Saving him a dark romanc.., p.18
Saving Him: A Dark Romance (Keep Me Series Book 2), page 18
I sigh and crush the empty bottle of sanitizer in my hand before throwing it on the floor of the SUV. My hands tremble as I hold them in front of me. I'm fucking losing it. Of all times to fucking lose it…why did it have to be now?
"I can't explain everything to you right now," I tell her, grimacing. "I'll just say I have a lot of issues."
Katya places one hand on her cocked hip. "No shit," she spits in her thick Russian accent.
If there's anything I've learned from Katya over the past couple of weeks, it's the fact that she speaks her mind. I think that's one of the things I like most about her. She's definitely been keeping Jax on his toes.
"Who cares if you have issues? We all have issues," she says, and I can see the hurt in her eyes beyond the stony expression. But as quickly as it appeared, it's gone. "You love her, don't you?" she asks pointblank.
"More than life itself," I confess.
"Then get your shit together and be the man she needs you to be right now."
Scowling, I rake my hands through my hair. "I fucking can't!" I yell. I feel helpless and hopeless and everything in between. "She deserves better than this," I murmur. "She deserves so much better than what I can give her."
Katya sighs and then is silent for a long time while I pace around the parking lot trying to force my legs to move towards the hospital instead of in a fucking endless circle.
"I'll be right back," I hear her say before she walks towards the hospital.
Fuck. Now she's gone too. And I'm out here all alone, not knowing what the fuck is going on with Adeline…or our baby.
My breathing becomes harsher, more desperate as I keep pacing, muttering to myself and counting the fucking cracks in the pavement.
The severity of the situation feels like a million ton weight on my back, and I feel like I could crack into a million different pieces at any given moment.
I could be losing them both right now. And without having Adeline in my life…I'm not sure what would happen to me.
I just finally got her back, and now I could lose her all over again…forever this time.
By the time Katya returns, I'm a fucking mess. She takes one look at me, and her eyes widen slightly before she schools her features. "Jax told me a little bit about your…issues," she says softly. "I think these might help."
I stare at the contents in her arms. I gently take everything and set it on the seat of the SUV. It looks like she raided a surgeon's locker. Turning to her, I ask, "Where exactly did you get all of this…or should I ask how did you get all of this?"
She cocks a brow and simply says, "I have my ways." Then she instructs me with a stern tone, "Hurry. Put them on."
Grabbing the set of scrubs first, I slide them over my clothes. Next, I slip on the boot covers and put the mask on my face. I breathe through the mask and instantly feel better.
Lastly, I grab the blue latex gloves and put them on.
Glancing at Katya, I earnestly tell her, "Thank you."
"You're welcome. Now, let's go see how your girl is doing."
CHAPTER 44
ADELINE
I SLOWLY BLINK my eyes open, blinded by the bright fluorescent light above me. I turn my head to the side and see a doctor sitting in a chair by the side of my bed before I close my eyes again.
I must be in a hospital, my foggy brain tells me.
I'm having a hard time remembering what happened.
Opening my eyes once again, I stare at the doctor. He's wearing light blue scrubs and a surgical mask. His gloved hands are threatening to pull his hair out by the root.
Why is he so stressed?
And then it hits me like I just ran into a brick wall. The baby…the blood…what happened to me?
A whimper escapes my lips, and the doctor's head snaps up at the sound. When his dark eyes meet mine, a sense of recognition instantly comes over me. "Lucien?" I ask, unsure.
He pulls down his mask, revealing the lower half of his incredibly handsome face. "Adeline," he croaks, his voice chock full of a million emotions.
He stands, pulls off his latex gloves and comes to me then, sitting down on the edge of the bed. I lean up and throw my arms around Lucien. He's stiff at first, but relaxes in my grip and snakes his warm arms around me, holding me as if he's afraid I'll float away.
Tears spill down my cheeks. "I thought you were dead. I thought I'd lost you forever," I choke out with a sob.
"I'm here. And I'm not going anywhere," he whispers in my ear.
He holds me while I cry it all out, soothingly running his hands down my back and placing soft kisses on my cheek and neck.
Then he releases me and pulls my hands into his. The warmth of his hands wrapped around mine feels so good on my icy cold skin.
"I don't know what I would have done if…" his voice trails off, and I can see the anguish in his gaze. I don't know if I've ever seen Lucien this upset before, and it's beginning to scare me.
"The baby," I whisper. "Is the baby okay?"
He takes a deep breath, not answering me right away. I mentally try to prepare myself for the worst, but then realize I can't. If we lost the baby, I will be completely devastated.
"Twins," he whispers.
"Twins?" I ask in disbelief.
"We lost one of the babies," he tells me.
My heart breaks a little, and I hold back a sob. "And the other baby?" I urge.
"Doing okay for now." His brows knit together. "You have to take it easy for the next few weeks and go through a lot of tests and ultrasounds to be sure everything is all right, but the doctor seemed pretty optimistic that you'll be able to carry to term."
He gives me a shaky smile, and I know exactly how he feels at the moment. Heartbroken because we lost one baby…but overjoyed because the other one is still alive.
"What happened…what happened to Giovanni?" I ask apprehensively.
Anger laces his features as he explains, "He's in jail where he belongs, but I promise you he'll never see the light of day again as long as I'm breathing."
I nod solemnly. Even though I wish he were dead, it brings me some comfort to know that he's behind bars and not walking around a free man and taking over my father's legacy. He's no longer a threat to us…for now. But I don't doubt Lucien's promise for a second that he'll make sure Gio never gets out of prison.
"I don't want to talk about him anymore," I tell Lucien. "I don't even want to think about him."
"Good," he sighs. "Me either." And then he says, "We have more important things to discuss anyhow." Lucien leans back and places his hand over my baby bump. "I can't believe it," he whispers in astonishment.
"I know. It was a little unexpected," I say, laughing and crying all the same time. "When I thought I was going to have to raise our baby alone…that he or she would never get a chance to meet you…" My face falls and the rivulets of tears start all over again.
"Shh, baby," Lucien says, drawing me into his embrace once more. "You don't have to think about that anymore, because I'm here. I'll always be here. I'm not going anywhere."
I nod against his chest.
"Adeline," he starts. He leans back and reaches into the pocket of his pants underneath the pair of scrubs he's wearing. "I've been carrying this around for weeks now, wanting it close to me at all times."
I gasp when he retrieves a small, blue box. "Lucien," I whisper.
"I wanted to take you to the Eiffel Tower and propose…or maybe on a trip to Antarctica…or maybe to a rainforest or —. I don't know," he says, shaking his head. "I definitely didn't want to propose to you in a hospital…but I can't wait any longer to make you mine forever," he confesses.
"I don't need to go anywhere or to do any of those things, Lucien. I only need you," I tell him adamantly.
He flips open the box and reveals the most gorgeous ring I've ever seen in my life. A large, round solitaire diamond sits atop a diamond-encrusted rose gold band.
Lucien pulls the ring out and cradles it between his thumb and finger. He stares at it thoughtfully for a few seconds before he turns to me. "Adeline, before I met you, it was as if the sun had set on my world, but never once risen. I never realized how much I was missing out on life before you walked into mine. You make me want to be a better man." He rests his other hand on my stomach, and a smile graces his lips. "And I want to make you and our baby feel cherished every single day for the rest of our lives together. If you'll have me, that is." Lucien takes my hand in his as our eyes meet. "Adeline, will you marry me?"
"Yes, yes, of course!" I cry out.
He slips the ring on my finger, and I feel complete even though our journey is just truly beginning. He kisses me and then hugs me to him. "I'm never letting you go," he whispers in my ear.
"I don't want you to," I tell him honestly. "Don't let me go, Lucien. Ever."
EPILOGUE
ADELINE
I was able to carry to term, just like the doctor predicted. And a little after seven o'clock in the evening on August 13th, a perfect little boy with ten fingers, ten toes and his daddy's dark hair and warm, chocolate eyes was born.
Alexander William Sterling.
Barbara and her new beau, Dr. Benson, came to visit me in the hospital. I had been so worried about her, but she recovered quickly from the torture that Giovanni had unleashed upon her. And still going with the belief that everything happens for a reason, she full-heartedly believed the whole ordeal brought her and Dr. Benson closer. She told me he'll never replace Paul, but he's a damn close second and makes her happy.
After Lucien and I arrived back on the island, I was worried at first as to how he would cope with a baby, but he has surprised me at every turn.
As long as I take care of the poopy diapers, which even most normal fathers don't want to deal with, he's been absolutely helpful and pretty darn perfect.
Lucien's obsessions with cleanliness haven't been nearly as bad since he's been having regular communications with a new therapist. Dr. Dan used to suffer from the same afflictions as Lucien, and they both survived horrible childhoods. Having found a common bond with the doctor, Luc flourished in therapy and learned how to control his urges and need to control.
Not that I don't want some of his control at times…especially in the bedroom.
"Hurry," Lucien says as he ushers me into our room.
We just put Alexander down for a nap, and when he's sleeping is the only time we can make time for ourselves. This is how our days go as busy parents of a newborn, but we always find time for each other.
Stripping out of our clothes and losing them along the way to the bed, we fall onto the soft mattress naked.
Luc's teeth tug at my lip before he kisses me like a man possessed. He's been insatiable lately since getting over a lot of his phobias, and it's been a challenge…but also so much fun for me to keep up with his appetite.
He leans back and gazes into my eyes. I run my fingers through his hair, which is always haphazardly sexy now instead of perfectly styled.
Lucien's lips trail down my chest to my full breasts. He kisses each mound and says, "No wonder Alexander's always hungry. I can't stay away from them either."
I slap him jokingly and giggle.
He looks at me and smiles a breathtaking smile. "Love that sound," he whispers before his mouth meets mine once more.
My thighs part for him as he nestles between them. His fingertips find my sensitive nub, and he softly rubs me into oblivion. Just as I begin to shatter under him, he enters me, not stopping until his thick cock is fully seated.
I gasp and then sigh in content. He feels so damn good inside of me. And since I got a Depo shot a few weeks ago, we don't have to worry about condoms…or more babies until we're good and ready.
Lucien says he wants to wait until after we're married to try again. We were so caught up with my nerve-wracking pregnancy that we put off the wedding until we can actually enjoy ourselves and not be stressed over everything.
And I cannot wait to marry this man and spend every waking moment with him.
With his hands planted by my head, Lucien's strong arms quiver as he tries to rein in his control and allow me time to adjust to him. But I don't want him to. "Take me, Luc," I whisper to him, licking the shell of his ear.
My words are his undoing, and his control unravels quickly. He pulls out of me almost the whole way before thrusting the whole way back in. I call out his name, and he growls against my neck, "Yes, baby."
He fucks me with reckless abandon after that, and I absolutely love it. Lifting my thighs, I wrap my hands around his backside and dig my fingernails into his muscular ass, pulling him into me harder and harder until we're both shouting and tumbling over the edge together.
He shudders in my arms as his hot seed spills inside of me. "Fuck, Adeline. I'll never get my fill of you," he says before dipping down and placing a kiss on my forehead. He pulls back to meet my eyes and then whispers, "I love you."
I close my eyes for a moment, relishing in the sound of those words coming from his mouth. I don't hear them often, but when I do, they mean so much more every time he says them.
Smiling up at him, I say, "I love you too."
The squeal on the baby monitor has our eyes locking and our smiles growing bigger. "He has impeccable timing," Lucien comments with a chuckle.
I hurry into the bathroom to clean up, and then we dress in record time, heading out the door when Lucien runs right into Jackson …and Katya?
Growling, Lucien says, "Tell me you both aren't into voyeurism now."
Jax holds his hands up in a placating gesture. "Hey, we were just coming to ask if we could take Alex for a walk in the stroller this afternoon."
Jackson has his practiced innocent look on his face. But Katya, on the other hand, looks guilty as sin.
Lucien turns to me with a knowing grin, and I smile back at him. He's leaving the decision to call them out on me, but I decide to let them off the hook…this time. "Sure, you can take him. But I need to feed him first."
Jackson nods and takes Katya's hand in his. "Okay. Well, we'll be…in my room…if you need us." Then they glance at each other like lovesick teenagers before walking away hastily.
"Fucking voyeurs," Lucien mutters under his breath as we watch the happy couple disappear down the hall.
I laugh and wouldn't be able to stop the giant smile from forming on my face even if I wanted to. Katya and Jackson seem really good together, and I couldn't be happier for the both of them. Katya keeps her secrets pretty well guarded; but from what I've gathered, she had a pretty shitty life before they found each other. And if she finally found her happiness with the man of her dreams, then I definitely know how she feels.
And it's the greatest feeling of all.
Lucien takes my hand and kisses my knuckles. "We should go feed Alex," he murmurs.
"We?"
"Well, you feed him. I'll watch," he tells me with a fire in his eyes.
"Now who's the voyeur?" I joke.
He scoops me up in his arms and kisses my nose. "Oh, baby, I don't mind watching or being watched…but I'll never share. You're mine," he growls. "Forever."
"Forever sounds nice," I tell him.
He kisses my lips sweetly before carrying me towards Alexander's room. "Forever it is then," he agrees.
THE END
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
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Angela Snyder, Saving Him: A Dark Romance (Keep Me Series Book 2)
