My heart is a fool, p.1
My Heart Is A Fool, page 1
My Heart Is a Fool
Written by
BriAnn Danae
Copyrighted Material
Copyright © 2017 BriAnn Danae
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without written consent of the publisher, except brief quotations in review form.
This is a work of fiction. Any characters, places, objects, references or similarities to actual events, real people, living or dead, or to real locals are intended to give the novel a sense of reality. Any similarity in other names, characters, places, and incidents are entirely coincidental and are solely of the Author’s imagination.
This book is dedicated to and inspired by my best friend, Frank. Love you for life! May you continue to fly high and watch over me.
“I’m living out my dreams cause dying the only thing that’s promised.” – FrankieBTW
Chapter 1
Relief washed over me as I pushed the door open to the lecture hall and walked out. The crisp afternoon breeze entered my nostrils, and I welcomed it with a grin on my face. I had just completed my last midterm final of my Junior year in college and felt pretty damn good about it. Seeing as though I was almost the first person to complete the simple six-page packet, I had better feel good about it. Plus, that meant I could start my spring break vacation one day early.
I’d usually go to the student union for a bite to eat, but I was ready to disappear from campus for a few days. Heading to the parking garage, I pulled out my vibrating phone and shook my head with a smile. “She couldn’t wait,” I chuckled, sliding my thumb to answer my best friend’s call.
“Yes, Greigh. How can I help you?”
“Girl. Don’t answer your phone like I’m bugging you. I know you’re finished with your finals, right?”
“Uh. Right. I answered my phone,” I said, walking under the passageway.
“Well… How’d you do? Never mind. I know you aced that shit, and I can’t wait until you get back to the crib so we can celebrate,” she said cheerfully.
Greigh has been my best friend since middle school, but honestly, we were more like sisters. She rooted for me, just as much as I rooted for myself. My choice to go away to college while she stayed in our hometown to pursue her dreams didn’t cause a drift in our friendship at all. In fact, it had brought us even closer than were already were.
“I pray I aced it. I was so ready to get up out of there; I almost missed a question. Is Karnae at the house?” I questioned.
Karnae is my roommate, turned friend. We had been roommates since freshman year in the dorms, and we quickly became good friends. We decided to get an apartment together. Besides Greigh, I didn’t have many female friends. Not now anyway. In high school, I had two hands full. Mama was right when she said I wouldn’t have the majority of my high school friends in college, but I couldn’t blame her. One by one, they slowly started to dwindle away.
“Nope. She just left and said for us to have a good time. She should already know that we are. Do you know how many fine men reside in the state of Texas? They said everything is bigger down there, and baby… They weren’t lying!” she squealed, making me laugh.
Pulling out of the garage, and the long line of waiting cars, I made a quick right at the light. “Let me find out you have a little side piece down there.”
“Gotta have a main piece to have a side, right? I’m single.”
“Yeah, well I’m not. Well, not technically. I’m waiting on Maayad to call me back and let me know if he can come down or not.”
Greigh sucked her teeth and got quiet for a second. “What is he going to be, our bodyguard or something? Leave his ass, where he’s at.”
I didn’t need to see her face to know she was rolling her eyes, with a frown etched across her face. It was clear as day that Greigh didn’t like my situation with Maayad; a guy I had been casually dating for the past three years. We had never made anything official as far as a relationship, but we both knew what we had. Plus, the long-distance thing was strenuous enough. No need to place extra pressure where it wasn’t needed.
“I miss him, G. It’s the perfect opportunity. His spring break is the same week. He only lives four hours away from Texas, if that. But, I understand if you just want…”
“Listen. You know I’m the last person to cockblock, Lena. I know you miss his ass. I just don’t want you to be upset when whatever answer he gives you, isn’t the one you want is all.”
It was no secret that Maayad had done his fair share of deceitful acts over the years. I’ve cried more tears than I would have liked, but he made me happy as well. Relationships aren’t perfect, so of course, I knew where Greigh was coming from. She was just looking out for me like she always had. A real friend always will.
I sighed and turned into the parking lot of our apartment. “I know. I’m outside, so I’ll be in there in a second.”
She said okay, and disconnected the call. Sitting in silence for a few minutes, I gathered my thoughts before climbing out and heading inside. Locking the door behind me, I walked in the kitchen and was handed a shot of something clear. Already knowing that it was Patron, Greigh’s favorite, I scrunched my face up.
“You couldn’t go with something light?” I questioned. “Wine coolers?”
“Nope. Light is for weak bitches. Last time I checked, you nor I were weak or bitches,” she smirked, moving her hand towards mine. “Cheers, boo!”
Throwing the shot back, it went down with a slight burn, instantly warming my frame. “Ugh! I don’t see how you drink this shit,” I hissed, wiping the corners of my mouth.
“The same way you used to take bottles of Hennessy to the head. Now, that my friend is ugh. Are you all packed?”
I nodded my head and trekked toward my bedroom with her following behind me; Patron bottle in hand. I had been packed and ready to go since the beginning of the week. Dallas in March wasn’t sweltering hot, but it wasn’t chilly like the Midwest weather. I was ready to feel a cool breeze, relax, and get some shopping done. For that reason alone, I had hardly packed any clothing. I had plans to bring a suitcase full back home with me.
“Yep. Been done since earlier this week.”
“Good. Now, all you need to do is call Maayad and see what the deal is. He’s on our time.”
Springfield to Dallas was a quick six-hour ride, in Greigh’s opinion. She didn’t mind driving the first four hours, while I finished off the remaining time. I had been taking finals all morning, and the last thing I was trying to do was get behind a wheel. I needed a quick burst of energy, and I’m sure the comfort of the passenger seat rental she had copped would offer just that.
As I relieved my bladder, Greigh hollered from the room that my phone was ringing. Out of habit, I hurried my movements, handled my hygiene, and hollered for her to answer it.
“What’s good G?” I heard Maayad’s loud voice boom through the speaker. He talked loud for no reason at all, like folk couldn’t hear him, but I loved it. I always laughed because he claimed he was talking regularly
“What’s up Maayad,” Greigh spoke, before passing me the phone.
Holding the screen up to my face, I couldn’t contain the smile that stretched my lips and lifted my already puffy cheeks. Maayad was so handsome. His chocolate skin looked as if it were glowing, as he grinned back at me. He was in desperate need of a cut, but that didn’t take away from his manly features.
To some, which didn’t sway my opinion at all, Maayad wasn’t the finest of them all, but I didn’t care. In my eyes, he was the shit, and that’s all that mattered.
“Hey. You just got out of practice?”
“Yeah. A nigga dumb tired. What you on? How was yo’ finals?”
Moving around my room, I picked up a few pairs of shoes, tossing them in my closet. I’d place them in the correct spot later. “I just got home. They were cool. So glad this semester is almost over.”
“Hell yeah. Aye, nigga! Take yo ass home,” he hollered out to someone, grinning. “Out here politicking with these hoes.”
“Maayad,” I hissed, annoyed at his choice of words.
He frowned and shrugged. “What? Ol’ girl is a hoe.”
“You don’t have to be disrespectful.”
“Aight, Lena. I ain’t trying to argue over some female you don’t even know. What’s up? You packed and shit?”
I rolled my eyes on the sly. Maayad was so used to us arguing, that he thought everything I said would turn into an argument. If the girl was a hoe, cool. He didn’t have to blast her out, but clearly it made no difference what I thought.
“Yeah. Are you going to be able to come down?” I asked, giving him that look. He knew I was already going to ask, so him huffing was pointless.
“Lena. You know I would come down if I could. We have a game this weekend, and you know coach gon’ be on our ass.”
Frowning, the corners of my lips curled upward at his rejection of my offer. Maayad always wanted to do things on his own time. Having given him ample amount of time to come to a decision, I wasn’t just about to chuck it up to his “busy” basketball schedule. I know their coach was going to give them some leeway. He had to. Not only was this the first Spring Break trip I was actually looking forward to, but I also wanted to spend time with him.
“Don’t start that pouting shit, man. You already know how being a college athlete goes,” he stressed. He shouldn’t have been the one huffing, though. I knew exactly how the college athlete lifestyle was and had been dealing with it since we began dating my
“You play this weekend though, Yad,” I whined, and Greigh stood from my bed and walked out. “You start spring break the same time as me.”
“And we have a game as soon as the week is over. I can just see you when we come home for the summer. Don’t start tripping, Lena. I told you it wasn’t a guarantee.”
I chuckled and shook my head. “No. What you said was, Bae, I’ll come wherever to see you. You’re acting like Texas is far from Oklahoma. Just say you don’t want to fucking see me, Maayad. Don’t use basketball as an excuse,” I spat, pissed off.
“Man,” he dragged, slightly chuckling, which only pissed me off more. “We ain’t about to do this shit. Not right now. I had a long day, and we been good Lena. Why you trying to wild out on a nigga, huh?”
He stared into the camera with those dark brown eyes I had fallen in love with years ago, and mine filled with tears. I hated when he tried to make it seem like I was tripping for no reason. Now, when I stopped tripping, he’d better not say shit.
“I miss you. Why can’t you just drive down for a day? I haven’t seen you since Christmas, and even then, it wasn’t long enough.”
“I miss you too, but you already know how this shit go. You on your cycle or something? Over there about to cry and shit,” he joked, making me chuckle.
“Shut up. And, no I’m not. But, okay,” I concluded, no longer feeling the need to… Beg? Yes, beg because that’s exactly what I sounded like. Clearly, his mind had been made up.
“Okay what?” he questioned, climbing in his truck.
“I guess I’ll see you in May or whenever you have time for me,” I shrugged, ready to get off the phone with him. He had ruined my mood.
I don’t know why he kept chucking like I was a fucking comedian. “Or whenever I have time for you, huh? Yeah aight, with your smart mouth. I’ma make it up to you. You know I love you girl,” he grinned, but I held my mean mug until I couldn’t help but crack a smile.
“You better. I love you, too. What you have planned for the rest of the day?”
“Rest up. I been up since four this morning. G driving the entire way?”
“No, four hours and I’ll do the rest. I really wish you could come. I’ve been super horny,” I groaned, and he licked his lips sexily.
Maayad wasn’t my first, but he had pretty much taught me everything I knew about sex. Having not lost my virginity until I was a senior in high school, I was still a rookie in the game when I met him. That quickly changed the summer we hooked up, and every holiday break when he could make it home. Let’s just say; I was in desperate need of some good sexing. A little attention wouldn’t hurt either, but long pipe would be just fine.
“I’m already knowing, baby. I’ma handle that too. Don’t even trip.”
I wasn’t tripping. Maayad’s pipe game was the truth. His personality was why I fell in love with him, though. He always spoke his mind even if it meant hurting my feelings sometimes. I’d rather him give me the truth than pacifying me with a lie any day. I wasn’t naïve either.
We weren’t in an official relationship; only dating long distance. So, I knew he had to be getting pussy from somewhere. The thought of him fucking another girl the way he did to me, had me taking deep breaths. Never in life did I think I would act out a certain way behind a man, but it had happened more times than I’d like to admit.
“Bitch, come take these shots,” Greigh hissed, peeking her head inside my door, with a wave of her hand. I tossed up my index finger before sitting up on my bed.
“I’ll text you before we head out, okay?”
“Bet. I’m about to head to the crib, shower, and watch these highlights. I might be sleep tonight, but just call me when ya’ll get there.”
“Okay. Love you lil Yaddi,” I laughed, knowing he hated that name.
“Gone with that dumb ass name. Love yo’ ass too. Don’t get down there and show your ass. You know I got eyes everywhere.”
I smirked. “Mhm. I bet. Get you some rest.”
Disconnecting the call, I held my phone in my hand for a few seconds. Though seeing Maayad would have made my entire spring break, I wasn’t about to pout about not being able to. Walking into the kitchen, Greigh handed me the second shot of Patron, and I tossed it back without making a face this time around. It was much needed.
Sighing heavily, I felt Greigh’s intense stare. “What?”
“You know I’m not even about to let you be all in your feelings over this nigga not coming. Did you ask Demir if he wanted to go? You know he’s always down for a road trip, and he can drive,” she threw out there, raising her eyebrow.
“I hadn’t, but it won’t hurt to ask.”
“Exactly. You know he will do anything for your spoiled ass,” she said with a playful roll of her eyes.
Stepping in her space, I wrapped my arms around her and grinned. “So will you, so don’t act brand new. Let me call him before it’s too late.”
The great thing about having two best friends was that they were equally supportive of me, and I was the spoiled one. The youngest, and most needy, but they loved me. I just hope Demir hadn’t already made plans because the rate Greigh was drinking at, we weren’t going to be driving anywhere. At least, not tonight.
“We’re going to be late. Where is he?” Geoni’s annoyed tone echoed throughout the silence of my whip, as we waited for my cousin to make his arrival.
We weren’t going to be late. And, even if we were, we were moving on my time. Looking her way, I didn’t say a word as she pouted and rolled her eyes. I had gotten us tickets to a concert Future was headlining, but business came first. Plus, that nigga Future had come in town once before, and Geoni had been front and center.
The iPhone signature tune resounded through the speakers, and I smirked at the FaceTime call I was receiving.
“Damn, who you?” I joked, as Malena grinned, showing off her high cheekbones.
“Best friend,” she whined, and I knew right then she wanted something. She always used that damn baby voice with me, and she always got her way.
“Don’t act like that. I’ve had finals all week. And the week before I was studying. Are you busy?”
I could feel the look Geoni gave me, and I looked her way before replying, “About to head out with Geoni. What’s up? You straight?”
She shook her head no, massive curls moving from side to side. I don’t see how she put up with all that damn hair on her head.
“I know it’s last minute, but do you want to go to Texas with me and Greigh?”
“She’s only asking you because that punk ass nigga Maayad-”
“Greigh!” Malena hissed, face going stone cold. “He doesn’t need to know all that.”
It didn’t matter what she didn’t want me to know, we had been best friends for years, so whatever Greigh was about to say I’m sure I had heard plenty of times before. I heard Greigh suck her teeth, and I chuckled.
“Shit. If no one knows what’s up, Demir does. Ain’t that right?” she asked, peeking into the screen with a smirk.
“What’s good G. I can slide with ya’ll though. When ya’ll leaving?” I asked, just as my cousin pulled into his driveway beside me.
Malena gave me a nervous look, and I already knew her and Greigh were on some hot shit. “Lee,” I called out, making her sigh at the nickname I had given her. “When ya’ll leaving?”
“Well… We were supposed to leave today, but we can wait until tomorrow. I mean, it’s no big deal.”
“Right. Plus, your ass can drive. We’ve been drinking, and you already know scary Larry over here is not about to let me get behind the wheel tipsy,” Greigh chimed in, making me shake my head.
“You drinking already? Finals must have kicked your ass.”
“Nope. They were a breeze actually. Greigh here wanted to celebrate, so here we are. An extra day is fine.”
“Babe, come on,” Geoni spoke, as we both watched my cousin walk inside his crib. If there was one thing I hated more than a liar, it was a muthafucka who tried rushing me. Geoni and everyone else who knows me knows that I make moves when I want. On my own time.
