Threads of fate, p.25
Threads of Fate, page 25
Chapter 20
Sweat ran down Orah’s back while she took it all in. She had no idea how any of the obstacles were supposed to entice her powers to come out.
“Okay, so, I think this course intends to kill me,” she said, glancing back over to Jes.
“Then don’t die,” Jes replied with a smirk.
She turned back to the course. Warmth hummed in her chest. Something was calling to that power—all she had to do was let it answer. She moved to head toward the platforms jutting from the mountain when Jes pulled her back.
“Wait,” he said.
“What?”
“The other day in the training room. You had said you had a question for me that you would get to ask if you got over that wall.”
“Oh, yeah. I was curious what it was between you and Roan that made you so protective, but he and I talked last night. I think I understand now,” Orah replied.
“You do?” Jes asked.
“You’re his Beskermer but more importantly you’re his friend.”
“Well, Orah Clark.” Jes waved his arm out in front of him. “Go get your ass kicked.”
The warm hum inside of her grew stronger while she approached the first platform. Taking her first step up, she watched in fascination but also horror as the cylinder arm jolted in and out of the mountain as though it were a battering ram designed to take her out. Her hands buzzed in response and she looked down.
Maybe if I just jump when it goes into the mountain, I can make it.
She stared at the arm while it disappeared into the rock briefly. She observed it for a few seconds trying to grasp any kind of pattern. Finally, she leapt forward right when the arm disappeared. She landed on the next platform with a loud grunt and the cylinder behind her flew forward, barely missing the edge of her shoes. Bolting upward she stood, then repeated the process to get to platform two, then three, then four. Standing on platform four, she jumped to five, sure she had the pattern of the cylinders down but that surety cost her. Platform five was further from four than the others had been. Her eyes widened and her hand flew out in front of her grasping at the air when the arm between four and five jolted out from the mountain and slammed into her side.
Time stood still and she was hurled to the ground. Hitting the dirt, pain erupted through her side. She bit back her scream while her vision blurred and her chest tightened. Her breath left her lungs and she laid staring at the blue sky, sure she had possibly taken her last breath.
Relax! Relax!
Her vision cleared and her chest loosened while air filled her lungs again. After a few moments laying on the warm dirt, she sat up and surveyed the platforms. Her eyes narrowed and her curses flew out of her mouth outside of her control.
“Orah?” Jes's voice sounded far away. “Orah, are you okay?”
Turning to find him, she winced from the bolt of pain that shot up her side. Biting her lip, she let out a deep breath and grabbed her side. “I’m good!” she yelled.
I’m very much not good.
“You will not let this beat you,” she whispered.
Blinding pain almost knocked the air back out of her when she stood and tried to steady herself. Making sure to breathe, her feet moved toward the platforms. Same as before, she got through platforms one to four. Standing on the fourth platform she stared at the fifth. The cylinder jolted out from the side of the mountain repetitively and her hands tingled in anticipation.
“Orah! The course is trying to challenge you. Feel your power. Let it help you!” Jes yelled.
So much easier said than done.
She turned back to the platform in front of her. The jump was definitely farther than the others had been from each other. Glancing back at the three behind her, she considered retracing her steps and calling it a day.
“Orah, don’t you dare give up.” The tone in Jes’s voice startled her. She glanced down to find him now standing near the first platform. “This is challenging your power. Let it help you. You don’t have to figure it all out by yourself. Your power is there to guide and support you.”
Orah scoffed at how easy he must have thought it was to just accept help. The power thrumming inside of her might have been hers but she didn’t know how she got it. It didn’t feel like it was hers exactly. It hadn’t ever been there to help or guide her through her life. Never showing up to protect her. Never stopping her pain. Her thoughts ran rampant inside while she stared down at Jes.
That growing power called to the hidden anger she kept buried deep inside. The bitterness she rarely allowed to come to the surface jumped, ready to be let out to play. She wasn’t sure what she was even doing there; trusting had never been easy for her, yet there she was trusting Jes when she wasn’t sure she could even trust herself.
“Orah, we don’t have all day,” Jes said from the ground below.
Shaking her head, she turned away and stared at the platform.
Trust.
The word felt bitter on her tongue. She thought back on all the times she trusted and her trust had been broken. She thought of trusting one of the few people who she should have been able to count on in her life and the black hole of despair that trust allowed in. She thought of her father and how thoroughly she trusted him but even he eventually left her as well. Tears welled in her eyes and her gaze locked on the platform ahead.
How could she trust this power if she couldn’t trust those closest to her?
How could she trust the power wasn’t there to hurt her in some way?
How could she trust herself when she didn’t even know what she was doing most days?
Her chest tightened and her anger begged to be let out. She stared at the obstacle course designed to supposedly help her learn how to protect herself. To protect herself from people like Marek.
I wouldn’t even be here if I hadn’t forced that damned door open.
Her vision blurred and she cursed herself and her stubbornness. How unwilling she was to just leave the door alone and come back another day. That had always been her thing – she could never leave things alone.
She poked.
She prodded.
She demanded the right things to be done. She wanted her way when it felt unfair.
Her breathing became low while the anger consumed her. Her body hummed and that darkness seemed to smile, clawing itself out of its hidden depths.
If only she could have left things alone she could have avoided so much pain in her life. If she didn’t insist on pushing, perhaps certain things wouldn’t have happened. If her anger hadn’t driven her to lash out, perhaps certain people would have still been there.
She could no longer see the platform. Her vision was blurred by the tears falling down her cheeks. Her hands felt warm and tingling and a strange buzz hummed from the tips of her toes to the top of her head. She laughed a low guttural laugh, as though she’d lost complete control of herself.
How convenient this power would have been years ago.
Why hadn’t it shown up when she needed it most?
When she was most vulnerable?
Darkness clawed up her throat and she threw her head back, letting out a scream. Sounds around her went out but the last thing she heard was Jes’s curse below her.
It’s warmer. She blinked away her tears.
Large hands on her arms startled her and her feet lifted off the ground. “What the hell?” she screamed, thrashing at the hands gripping her. They rose into the air and she stared down in horror. The obstacle course was on fire.
“Orah you need to calm down right now.” Reality came back and she realized Jes was who had her – Jes’s hands held her arms.
A large gust of wind next to her pulled her gaze from the hypnotizing flames and she looked to her right. Tume was now hovering next to her watching the flames. Relief washed over Orah, she would have never forgiven herself if her fury had injured the Pegasus.
Taking a deep breath in then out she watched mesmerized while the flames shrank further and further with each breath she let out. They hovered over the course while she breathed until finally the flames reduced to smoldering embers. Nothing appeared to have been destroyed, but a heavy layer of smoke surrounded them when they landed back on the ground.
Jes set her down and she rubbed her arms. “I’m definitely going to bruise,” she whispered, while her fingers brushed tender spots.
“Bruise?” Jes snapped his head to her. His eyes were wide with either anger or surprise. Maybe both. “You’re worried that I may have bruised you after pulling your ass from a fire you set? What were you doing up there to cause a fire to erupt?”
They stared at each other while she considered his question. “I was thinking,” she said.
“Thinking? About what? The firepits of Shadus?” his hands fell, smacking against his thighs.
"Well, since I don’t actually know what that is or looks like, no. I was–” Stopping herself, she stared at him. He didn’t need to know what she was thinking about. “I was just thinking. That’s all.”
His eyes narrowed. “Orah, no one that was thinking about anything good sets an entire obstacle course on fire.”
“It doesn’t matter what I was thinking about,” she snapped.
“If you want me to train you, then you need to be honest with me,” he bit back.
“I will be honest as best as I can, Jes.”
Stepping back, his eyes scanned her up and down. “You can’t control whatever magic you have if you can’t accept yourself or what lives inside you.”
Irritated, she crossed her arms “You’ve said this before. I don’t need advice on how to deal with my traumas.”
Shock flashed across his face. “Traumas?”
“We’re not getting into that. Let’s make a deal. You will train me and I will figure out my own shit inside my head.” He opened his mouth to respond but she threw up her hand, stopping him. “I will figure out my own shit myself,” she said, firmly.
For a moment he looked as though he was going to argue but instead he nodded, stepping back. “I’m not sure what you’ve lived through Orah but I won’t pry. I’ll accept your deal.”
“Thank you,” she grimaced. “Did I break your course?”
“No. This isn’t the first time someone’s power has caused a little destruction,” he said with a laugh.
She watched him walk toward the wardpad, motioning for her to follow. He pricked his thumb, pressed it against the pad. In an instant the destroyed obstacles were replaced by the course she’d observed when they first arrived. As though her flare of anger hadn’t happened.
Amazed and slightly amused she turned back to him with a grin. “Well. Now that that’s fixed, how about the other half of our training?”
He shook his head sternly. “We’re not sparring today, Orah.”
“What? Why not?” she asked.
With a smile he approached her then poked her side. She jumped back screaming from the jolt of pain and glared at him. “What did you do that for?”
“You’re injured. I’m not teaching you how to fight when you were knocked through the air and onto your ass,” Jes replied.
“I could get injured every single day we’re out here. Does that mean you’ll perpetually put off teaching me to defend myself?” she asked, sure she was making a valid point.
“No. What it means is that we need to be better prepared tomorrow. There are tonics you can take to help protect yourself from injuries. We’ll want to grab some from the city before we come back.”
Trying to hide her grimace as she shifted, she placed her hand on him and scowled. “And once we have those, you’ll teach me how to fight?”
He gave her a sly smile “Yes.”
The anticipation of what was to come was almost painful while she imagined all she could accomplish there. What she could possibly discover about herself. What she could possibly accept about herself…
She turned back to walk toward Tume and tilted slightly from the pain in her side reminding her it was still there. Jes rushed to her, steadying her. “We better get you back to the house,” he whispered. His hands wrapped around her shoulders and he slowly guided her to Tume. “May I?” he asked, pointing to her waist then toward the saddle.
“Oh – yeah but be careful, please.” He wrapped his hands around her and lifted. Her side spasmed in protest and she let out several pants trying to ignore the pain.
Jes grimaced. “Are you going to be good to fly?”
“I think so. You said it’s only fifteen minutes, right?” She tried to tell herself fifteen minutes was nothing, but just sitting in the saddle was already agonizing.
Concern flashed over his face and he buckled the straps around her. “Yes, but I think you’re more injured than you realize. Fifteen minutes may feel like fifteen hours.”
"There’s no other way to get back, right?”
“Correct,” he replied.
“Then I guess we better go then.”
Nodding he patted Tume, whispering something she couldn’t hear. Tume looked back at Orah cautiously then back at Jes. With a nod and a huff she reared back and shot into the sky. Tears sprung from Orah’s eyes at the jolt of pain that cascaded through her. Tume flew as though she were trying to take it easy but Orah’s side screamed in protest. She tried her best to sit as still throughout the ride, keeping her eyes on the city as it grew closer.
Jes hadn’t been kidding that the time it took to get back would feel longer. When they finally descended, Orah let out a breath of relief that she would be out of the saddle soon. She gasped when they landed and found Roan standing by the stables talking to Kai. Slowly he turned and she knew somehow he was aware she’d been injured.
“What happened?” His question was more of a command and she stared at him in shock.
Landing next to her, Jes bowed his head. “The course warded itself to try and invoke her powers. She was thrown to the ground on her first try.”
“How?” Roan’s voice echoed through the trees surrounding the stables.
Orah and Jes glanced at each other nervously. Taking a deep and very painful breath Orah replied, “There were platforms coming out of the mountains and these cylinders shooting in and out of the mountain. I jumped from one platform to the other and the cylinder thought it needed to stop me.” She lifted her shirt to show him and winced. Roan and Kai’s responding gasps surprised her and she looked down. Shit. She hadn’t taken a moment yet to check herself out and found a large bruise running right above her hip to the top of her ribs.
The ground shook and Roan turned to Jes. “Did you seem to forget that she’s a mortal?”
“She’s a mortal with powers, Roan.” Jes stood taller with his arms folded.
Orah rolled her eyes. She was getting tired of them acting as though they knew more about her well-being than she did. She patted Tume’s neck and the Pegasus lowered her front legs, understanding Orah’s request. Unbuckling Orah hopped out of the saddle, landing on the ground with a soft “Umph.” Standing as steadily as she could she straightened herself hoping neither Roan nor Jes could see the pain now rattling her bones.
They both turned their attention from each other and rushed to her side. Throwing up her hands, she stopped them and held onto the saddle for support. “Despite what either of you think, I know what’s best for myself.” Looking at Roan she stood a little straighter. “I know you feel that my wellbeing is your responsibility, but it’s not. I know what I’m getting into by training at a magically controlled course. Jes told me today we were both unprepared and that won’t happen next time.”
Roan was silent, seeming to contemplate his response before he nodded. “I understand. Jes can you please run to the healer and grab as many tonics as you can?” Orah kept her eyes on Roan while Jes launched himself into the air.
Roan walked toward her with his arms out. “I know you said you’ve got yourself but you look like you might fall down at any moment. Can I help you inside?”
As if on cue, her legs shook under her and she nodded her head. “I think that’s probably wise,” she replied. Expecting him to wrap his arms around her shoulders like Jes had at the camp, but instead he scooped her up into his arms. “Shit!” The curse flew out of her mouth from the pain that spasmed in her side.
“I’ve never heard anyone curse as often as you do.” Roan laughed.
She blushed. “That’s not even the worst thing I’ve said.”
He did nothing to hide the amusement in his response. “Oh I know.”
She clutched the back of his shirt while he made his way inside. Ms. Perri met them at the bottom of the stairs and stared at Orah. “What did you do to yourself?” Ms. Perri asked, covering her mouth with her hand.
Orah smiled. “Just a bit of training. I’m fine.”
Ms. Perri’s eyes shot to Roan and he nodded. “She’ll be okay. Jes ran to the healer for tonics. But I need help getting her door open upstairs.” With a nod Ms. Perri rushed beside them while Roan tried to walk up the stairs as slowly as he could. Each step he took was more agonizing than the last and Orah was covered in a thin layer of sweat by the time they made it to the top.
Roan leaned down whispering in her ear, “I know you can’t really control it but could you try not sweating so much? You might slip out of my arms.” His joke shocked her and she let out a laugh followed immediately by groans of pain.
“Oh. Please don’t make me laugh,” she said.
“Why would I ever not try and make you laugh?” he replied.
