Cole protecting you find.., p.12
Cole (Protecting You, Finding Us), page 12
Cole takes one look at me, and his eyes get wide.
“Jeeeeesus,” he mumbles, running his hand up his chest and over his mouth. I swallow hard as I take him in. His light blue collared shirt is tucked into bootcut dark denim with dark brown boots. A whiff of his clean scent invades my nose as he towers over me in his usual power stance with his hand on the top of the doorframe. Just fucking take me right here and now and put me out of my misery. His eyes travel down my tight black dress before making their way back up to mine.
“How do I look?”
“Like I’m about to commit three sins.” His expression changes with the blink of an eye as he takes a step back and cracks his neck. “Dress like that is about to have the eyes of every horny dude in this county. I’d hate to go to jail tonight.”
From the way he’s talking, I know murder would be the first sin, but I can’t help but wonder what the other two would be. He holds his elbow out for me to take, and it feels like pins and needles are prickling my skin as I entangle my arm with his. Cole is clearly uninterested, which means I need to ignore the way I’m feeling and stop taking every gesture he does as sexy. He’s doing it because he’s my friend, and he’d hold on to anyone in heels. It’s just who he is.
My new heels click on the hardwood floors, and he takes each step down the stairs slow and steady, holding on to me tightly. Cole pays attention to my feet as we go down each step because I know he would throw himself down before letting me fall. We walk to his truck and drive down to the hall, and what I saw yesterday from the outside has nothing on what I’m seeing now.
String lights, balloons, and probably a million gorgeous flowers adorn the front of the fancy building. Cars are parked in a grassy lot, and people are mingling all over the place.
“I can’t believe how many people are here,” I say.
“My aunt is a beloved staple to the county. I’d bet everyone who has ever known her is probably here today. And throwing these big events is what she does best. I knew this was going to be huge.”
I spot the cashier from in town today and get angry all over again. It wasn’t easy to mask my rage after being accosted by that fucking reporter in the store. I still don’t even know how he knew where to find us, but he is just as much the snake as I thought he was. When I get back home, he’s going to be lucky to keep his job. I’ll buy that fucking newspaper and close the damn thing down if I have to. Somehow, he had a still shot of Cole standing over Louis in the bar and threatened to put it on the front page if I didn’t promise to give him a personal interview with me. The heiress of the Judge Media. God, this makes me so fucking sick.
If Cole found out, I don’t even want to know what he would do, but I guarantee it would only fuel Aiden’s story. Not to mention, from everything I’ve gathered, his uncle has a pretty protective spot for Cole too, and I can only imagine the things that man is capable of if Cole were to get into trouble. It’s just too much drama for today. I’ll deal with it when I get home because I have no intention of giving that bottom-dwelling fucker a story.
“Hey,” Cole says, touching my arm and pulling me back to the moment. The truck is already parked, and his door is open, but I’m just sitting here. “What are you thinking about?”
“I was just thinking about how much fun Levi is probably having,” I lie.
His thumb rubs on the back of my hand, and I fall back into the feelings I had when he touched me in the bedroom. I have to stop this. It’s never going to happen between Cole and me. If it was, it would have happened already. But it all came down to that night at my prom. I went in to kiss him, and it looked like he was leaning in too. Until he stopped me and told me that we would never cross that line. He was just being honest, but I have never been more embarrassed in my entire life, and that moment stuck with me. He didn’t want me. He doesn’t want me. And I’m just being a desperate, middle-aged, single mom who can’t commit to anyone. Pathetic.
“I’m sure he’s having a blast. But don’t worry, he misses you. You’ll see him soon. Now, let’s go get this over with.”
Whenever Cole talks about Levi, he gets sexier and sexier. The way he loves my boy so hard and how he’s so understanding and patient with him just lights my heart on fire. Cole holds on to me as we walk closer to the doors, and a little grunt comes from under his breath. I look up at him, and his face is scrunched up so tightly.
“You’re going to be fine. There are so many people here that you don’t have to be face-to-face with your dad if you don’t want to be. We’ll just stay away from him the best we can.”
Cole nods, but I can tell he doesn’t believe that. Hell, I don’t even believe that. If I remember his dad as well as I think I do, that man will come across the room just to say what he wants to say to Cole.
“Holy shit, Cole, is that you?” A man that looks a lot like Garrett but missing those grumpy lines on his forehead walks up to us with a huge white grin as we walk into the hall. My heart stops at the sight. Just like in their house, one wall of the wide-open space is nothing but windows and a glass door in the middle for people to walk onto a patio. There are lights strung through the rafters and huge crystal chandeliers that hold a vast contrast to the warm, dark wood room. The tables are lined in crisp cream linens, and flowers are scattered on the tops with crystal oil lamps.
“Jace, so good to see you, man.” Cole skips the handshake and goes straight in for a hug. “This is Steph. Steph, this is my cousin Jace.”
Jace wags his eyebrows at Cole before politely holding his hand out for mine. “Nice to meet you, ma’am. How do you put up with this guy?”
“I beat him,” I say, which gets a laugh out of Jace.
“Probably the only logical thing to do,” he says, and Cole shakes his head.
“Uncle Jace!” a young girl with a bouncy ponytail calls from behind him. He spins around, and the girl points to a plate of food sitting next to her at an empty seat.
“Get some food, you two, and we’ll catch up after supper.”
“Will do,” Cole says.
Jace tips his cowboy hat at me and walks toward the girl. That’s when I realize over half of the men in this room are wearing one.
“That’s Shelby, Garrett’s daughter. She’s got to be like fifteen now. I can’t believe how much she’s grown since I’ve seen her last.”
“Look at this big old family you have here, Cole. Why the hell did you stay in Georgia?” I ask.
He looks at me but starts walking to the buffet line. “I had my reasons.”
As the evening goes on, without one altercation with Cole’s dad, Cole and I wander apart from each other. But every time I look for him in the crowd to check on him, he’s always looking back at me. The people here are so chatty and sweet that I’ve talked to quite a few people. Cole’s aunt is a firecracker, and if a large crowd busts out in laughter, you can bet she’s in the middle of it. Lance hasn’t moved from his seat at the table, but there’s always a group of guys around him. I’ve spotted Cole’s dad a time or two, so I know he’s here, but so far, it seems like they’re both avoiding each other.
“Those shoes are amazing,” Shelby says, looking down at them as we stand at a tall table next to the dance floor. After twenty minutes of nothing but shoe talk with Shelby, and seeing how she’s gushed over how the gold sparkles on the shoes I bought today, I think I’ll leave them here for her when we go back home. And she’s not the only one who noticed my shoes. For as many compliments as I’ve gotten on my sparkly shoes, I’m glad I shaved my legs. No, I’m glad that Cole shaved my legs. For more than one reason. The music changes, and Shelby’s face lights up as she darts away from me to a group of young girls that look to be her age, leaving me in the middle of the room.
“Let’s go,” Jace says, walking up to me with his hand out.
“Go where?”
“Dance. It’s the two-step.”
I give a nervous laugh. “Oh, no, thank you. I don’t know how to two-step.”
His jaw drops. “Wanna learn? I mean, we’re dressed all fancy, but if your shoes bother you, you can kick them off like they have,” he says, pointing to the other women in fancy dresses with no shoes. He looks too excited for me to say no.
“All right, go easy on me.”
As Jace leads me onto the dance floor, I search the room for Cole, but for the first time, I don’t see him standing in any of the groups around the room, and I get a little worried.
Jace twirls me around and then stands in front of me. “Your right hand goes in my left hand,” he says, taking my hand and raising it to the height of my shoulder. “You’re going to start with a step back with your right leg as I step forward with my left.”
I follow his instructions, and he grins. “See? Not so hard. Let’s take a few steps together. There you go. Now we’re going to do quick, quick, slow.”
As I listen to Jace and do his dance, I can’t stop scanning the room. Then I see him, sitting in a chair with his arms crossed over his chest, the veins sticking out on his forearms, and a look of murder on his face as his dad hits his hand onto the table in front of them. I want to run over there and pull Cole away, but I’m watching closely to make sure Cole isn’t balling up his fists or about to flip a table. Still moving around the dance floor, I can almost see the moment when Cole breaks, but it’s not in the way I thought. His arms loosen, and his body slumps.
“You’ve got this down,” Jace says, and I don’t even know what I’m doing.
With the most heartbreaking, defeated look on his face, Cole gets up from the chair, and with his dad’s mouth still moving, he walks away.
“I’m sorry, Jace. Thank you so much for teaching me, but I need to go check on Cole.”
“Anytime,” he says cheerfully. He grabs another woman from the side and pulls her onto the dance floor as she squeals in delight.
My first instinct is to run to Cole and comfort him. Tell him everything his dad just said is a lie. But as I get closer to Ted, I have a few things to say to him first.
“How dare you.”
“Well, Stephanie Judge. I didn’t expect to see you here.”
“I bet you didn’t. What did you say to him?” I stand in front of his disgusting, smirking face as he sips on a glass of liquor.
“The truth someone needs to be tellin’ him. That’s the boy I raised? Unbelievable. I always thought he’d wisen up when he got older. But here we are. All these years later, and he’s still floundering in that town, playing salon like a goddamn loser. What a disgrace to the family name.”
“I think you need to shut your fucking mouth and look in a mirror. The only disgrace here is you.”
Like a villain from every movie I’ve ever seen, the corners of his lips slowly rise, deepening the long wrinkles on the sides of his face.
“Looks like you might be in love with my son, Stephanie.”
The rate at which the air is moving in and out of my body could make me pass out at any moment, but the absolute fury that’s erupting inside of me is like nothing I’ve ever felt.
“So what if I am?” I blurt out and immediately want to throw up.
“What a waste that would be.”
I pick up one of the glasses that someone left on the table, and just as I’m about to throw the liquid inside all over his face, a hand encloses mine.
“Not worth it,” Cole says calmly. He takes the glass out of my hand, sets it on the table, and leads me out of the building.
“Where are we going?” I say, trying to keep up with the rapid pace his long legs are keeping. He doesn’t answer me.
Down a small walkway, I notice a tiny cabin that looks like a miniature version of the big hall we just came out of. Cole pushes open the door, and before I can even look inside, he spins me around, pins my body against the door, and kisses me. He kisses me. With all the fervor and passion that I always imagined a kiss from Cole would. The shock of what’s actually happening freezes me in place for a split second, but then I kiss him back. His warm tongue slips through my lips, and I taste Cole McBride for the first time. I’ve wanted this so badly it almost makes me want to cry. One of his hands grips my hip so hard I hope it leaves a mark forever as his other hand snakes around my back, pulling my body into his as I fall further and further into the spell of him. The kiss between us is wild and strong. My hands glide up his back as his hand runs down my ass and lifts my leg by the thigh.
“I’ll kill you, you son of a bitch.” The sound of Lance yelling outside pulls Cole away, and I can hardly catch my breath. If I wasn’t mistaken, the look on his face is laced with regret before the scuffle outside pulls his attention through the small window. “I told her not to invite your ass. No one wants you here.”
“Stay here,” he says. “My uncle is after my dad.”
I nod and move to the side, and he runs out of the tiny cabin as my lips still burn from fifteen years of pent-up yearning. But now it feels like it was ripped right back out of my hands as a cruel joke. If we weren’t so far from the house, I’d leave right now. I want to cry, but I won’t let myself under any circumstances. My heart is in my throat as I race to the window to see if I need to go after Cole since that was my job and all coming here. But I see Cole holding Lance back and Garrett hauling Ted to the parking lot. Once he’s far enough away, Cole lets go, and Lance turns around to talk to him, looking red-faced and furious. Cole places a hand on Lance’s shoulder, and I take a step away from the window, knowing Cole is okay.
But once I’m not worried about the fight, my chest hurts for another reason. I look around the small space, trying to make sense of what just happened. The cabin is only one room with a few windows, a large mirror with a platform in front of it to stand on, a couch, a pretty floral chair, and a small kitchenette. This is probably the place the bridal party comes to get her dressed when they host weddings. Which somehow makes this all even worse because that’s not in the cards for me. It was a decision I made when I got diagnosed. But here I am, in a bridal suite, just having kissed the man of my dreams. The sudden realization hits me that it’s possible he heard me tell his dad that I’m in love with him. What if he did? Does that mean he feels the same way toward me since he dragged me out here and pressed his needy lips to mine? Instead of being elated that it finally happened, I’m more confused than ever.
Cole finally returns and nods for me to follow him. I clear my throat because I’m a little nervous about how my voice is going to come out of my mouth. “Is your dad still alive?”
“Unfortunately. He left. Do you want to go back in or…”
“Honestly, it’s already pretty late. I think I’d rather go up to bed. If you could just give me a ride back, you can come back down.”
He nods and holds his arm out for me to take it again, and I do. But it doesn’t feel the same. It feels different between us. Not awkward or standoffish. Just different. Which is exactly what I was afraid of. What if he realizes kissing me was a mistake and everything I had feared if I acted on my feelings for Cole comes true? What if he just acted in the heat of the moment and that moment is gone now?
CHAPTER TWELVE
Cole
I kissed her. And I don’t regret it, but it scares the shit out of me. I felt weightless and like there was an anvil inside of me all at the same time. I don’t know how far it would have gone, but I can only imagine if we didn’t get interrupted. As we drive up to my aunt’s house, the quiet in the truck is so loud. But there’s no denying that she kissed me back. Her hands were digging into my skin and were clutching onto me with the same desperation that I was holding her with.
I held it together, just trying not to make a scene for as long as I could. Listening to him criticize my barbershop and telling me all the ways I fucked my life up really tested my self-control. He even went so far as to look up my barbershop website and tell me how terrible it looks. He blamed me for Mom leaving like he always does, and that’s when I couldn’t listen to it anymore. I couldn’t believe his new wife just sat on the other side next to him quietly as he talked about Mom with a smirk on her face as she drank her wine. I wanted to punch him so bad, but I went looking for Steph instead. She’s always a straight line when mine goes wonky. And I need her to tell me he’s just an asshole and that I’m not those things he called me. Because I still can’t shake the horrible feeling inside he gives me.
I didn’t look for long before I heard Steph’s voice. I couldn’t make out what she was saying, but I saw the fire in her eyes and her hand reach for that glass. I knew I had to get to her quickly before all hell broke loose. But there was something about the way she stood up to him for me that made me wild. I was able to control how I reacted to my dad, but there was no control when it came to my need to kiss her. To feel her up against my body and play out every fantasy I pictured in my head while my hands were all over her earlier.
When the fight broke out between my uncle and my dad, it snapped me back into the world of my reality. I saw her red lips from mine claiming her, and she looked so beautiful panting for me. But when I went back in, she was quieter, meeker, and her hand didn’t hold on to my arm as tightly as it did before. What did I do?
The lights glow inside the house as I park the truck. Steph gets out and doesn’t wait for me to walk her inside. If I’ve ruined this, I’ll never forgive myself. The house is quiet as we enter, and Steph goes straight for the stairs and jogs up. Is she trying to get away from me? I have to fix this. I have to fix this right now.
