Harlequin dare june 2021.., p.34
Harlequin Dare June 2021 Box Set, page 34
Cole nodded. “I appreciate it, man.”
Nate’s eyes narrowed in speculation before he dropped his own hand on Cole’s shoulder. An echo of what Cole had done earlier yet not quite as friendly and heading more into warning territory. “I understand that my sister is an adult but I’ll be damned if anyone else messes with her. She’s going through a rough time right now and I wouldn’t be doing my brotherly duty if I didn’t tell you to proceed with caution.”
Cole nodded, strangely pleased Nate had his sister’s back. He’d do the same for his own sister if she’d been in Blair’s position. He also wondered more about the rough time and if it was about the breakup she’d mentioned yesterday.
“I’m not that guy anymore,” Cole told him, referring to the fact that two years ago he wouldn’t be caught dead at a fancy winery party mostly because he would have been at the nearest bar getting shit-faced before sleeping with whoever wanted to come back to his hotel. But his old life seemed like something that happened to another person at this point. His entire existence was divided into before and after the crash. “And she’d bust my balls if I tried anything anyway,” Cole said with a laugh.
Nate grinned. “Well, you’ve gotten to know her then at least.”
“She’s a singular woman, your sister,” Cole told him. “I’ll let her know her presence was missed.”
Nate just shook his head as Cole turned to the exit. “I’m sure that’ll go over well.”
In his car, Cole wondered just what the hell he was doing by going to Blair’s house, what endgame was he hurtling toward exactly? If something happened with Blair, it couldn’t go anywhere. Maybe that was what was driving him now, the fact that he’d never see her again after tonight. But the reasons why this was probably a bad idea didn’t seem to matter as he came upon the cute two-story white modern farmhouse with twinkle lights draped around the length of the wide wraparound porch.
He’d no sooner opened the door and emerged than he heard, “You weren’t invited.” He could make her figure out, sitting on one of the cushioned loveseats under a wide picture window.
“You promised me a bottle of special pinot noir and I’m here to collect,” he called back, leaving his car doors unlocked like he’d seen Nate do yesterday at the tasting room. The casual trust around the winery reminded him of home. The Sandovals were open and honest people, something he’d missed over the years working the races and being in constant competition with damn near every person he met. Here on the vineyard, that life didn’t matter and he found some of the tension he carried fade away.
All that mattered to his body, in fact, was that Blair was close, and it wanted to say hello. Intimately.
“Nate could have given it to you at the winery.”
Cole stopped at the bottom of the stairs and looked up at her. She was lovely sitting on her porch with her feet drawn up beside her and her white linen skirt floating over her legs and a loose-fitting sky-blue tunic on top. “Nate also wanted me to check on you,” he lied. “He seemed pretty upset that you decided to shirk your hosting duties.”
Blair snorted. “He can go kick rocks. He knows exactly why I left and why it was necessary.”
“You scared of meeting your competition?” Cole taunted mildly, thinking of Nate’s offer to introduce him to other winery owners. Though he got the point that she must have seen someone there associated with her ex.
He could see her roll her eyes even in the low light. “Trust me, they’re far more scared of me than the other way around.”
“I take it you’ve told them about your whole men in a firepit idea as well?”
She met his eyes then. Their little game was over. “I told you I didn’t want to go to dinner with you.”
“Yeah, but this isn’t dinner.” This was what he wanted anyway, time with her one-on-one and the closer they were to a bed seemed to just better the odds that they might end up there.
As he watched her, he wondered if she’d ever give him clearance to join her on the porch, but at her next words he wasn’t sure he wanted to. “I did an internet search on you today.”
He knew it was inevitable and it wasn’t as if he hadn’t done one on her as well. He didn’t find much besides write-ups about the winery, her awards for craftsmanship, articles about how she was an innovative and badass female grower in an industry dominated by men. All stuff that basically intrigued him more and which had ultimately driven him to where he was currently standing. A search on him, on the other hand, well, that was a different thing altogether.
She stood and walked down the steps, eventually stopping on the last one so that they were the same height.
“You lost your brother,” she said quietly. Then she laid a hand on his shoulder, the first time she’d purposely touched him, and despite the fact that it was purely out of pity, it set his body on fire. “I’m sorry about that, Cole.”
He nodded mechanically, used to the sympathy by now. The long googly-eyed looks from people who barely knew him but wanted him to know just how much they felt for his loss, the awkward claps on the back from men he used to party with who were now uncomfortable in his presence, the silence from his family who were even more devastated than he was. Those simple words from her brought all of it back.
“No reason for you to be sorry,” Cole assured her, swimming hard upstream to not get dragged into the past. “Racing is a dangerous sport. You don’t do it without knowing the possible consequences.”
Her eyes locked on his then, the twinkle lights turning hers a golden amber. From this close, he also spotted a few pale freckles on the bridge of her nose. She was as adorable as she was fierce and being with her felt like he was seeing himself again for the first time since his brother’s death. He could get addicted to it if he wasn’t careful. Except that, of course, he would be careful because he owed it to his brother to be gone tomorrow.
“You don’t have to talk about it,” she said, giving his shoulder a squeeze before her hand drifted off. At the last second, he caught it in his, lacing their fingers together. He looked down at their joined hands trying to figure out when the last time was he’d held hands with a woman and coming up completely blank. Worse, the answer might actually be never. She gave their hands a glance and a raised eyebrow when her gaze returned to his, but she didn’t try to remove hers. “You can tell me instead how you got the nickname Easy Rider.”
A corner of her mouth quirked up and she continued, “Because I think there’s probably a double meaning behind it.”
He shook his head. “I won a lot of races,” he explained. “Easily.”
She smiled. “What are you really doing here?”
“I liked hanging out with you and I thought you liked hanging out with me too.” He gave her hand a squeeze, her soft fingers warm in his. “And your brother beat me at golf today and was being insufferable about it. I had to get out of there.”
“Now I know you’re lying,” she laughed. “Golf is the only thing my brother isn’t good at.”
“I’m not much for parties anymore,” he tried instead, “and especially ones where I don’t know anyone and where everyone there wears a watch worth more than the house I grew up in.”
“Why did you go to the party at all then?”
He raised an eyebrow. They both knew why he’d gone.
She sighed then, seeming to have made a decision. Then she let go of his hand, climbed the stairs and disappeared into her house, the squeak of the screen door loud in the quiet evening. Cole wasn’t sure if he was meant to follow her, but just as he was about to call her name, she reappeared with a wineglass, another bottle of wine and a very large bowl of popcorn.
Tilting her head for him to join her, he noticed an open bottle and half-full wineglass already on the wicker table in front of her. There were several seats he could take but he opted to sit next to her on the two-seater.
“What are we drinking?” he asked, peering down to read the label.
“It’s next year’s first bottling of zinfandel.”
“And?” he asked, interested in how she felt about her own wine and excited to try something no one else had had yet. It felt like a secret they were sharing together here on a world-class vineyard where people would kill to be in his place.
“It’s pretty lovely. Lots of cherry, lots of pepper but it feels balanced.” She gave her glass a swirl and he decided he could watch her drink wine for hours.
She poured him a glass and watched as he drank. “I like it,” he eventually said. “Definitely less intense than the one we had in the pairing yesterday, but I liked that one too.”
Laughing, Blair dug into the bowl of popcorn. “Yeah, that’s how most people feel. People take all that sniffing and flavors so seriously. The truth is that it’s just fun to see what all you can taste in a single sip of wine but ultimately you’ll have fun drinking it either way.”
She pushed the bowl of popcorn toward him and he took a handful, mostly to be polite and to have something else to do with his hands besides touch her, which he was already missing.
“So you quit racing after the accident?” she asked, meeting his eyes.
He nodded, reluctant to share but finding that he didn’t feel as reticent as he usually did. He wasn’t worried that Blair would go tell the press what he said or hold anything against him. He didn’t know if he’d ever find the absolution he’d been searching for, but after two years he couldn’t say he was picky. Most days he’d give anything to wake up without the gnawing pit of guilt and sadness the loss of his brother and the resulting rift between him and his family had left in his life. One that up until now he’d had little hope of ever filling. But for whatever reason, the moment he’d stepped into that winery and seen Blair trying to hide a plate of cheese, a light had turned on inside him, giving him hope that maybe one day he’d see himself out of the darkness. Then learning she had her own demons to contend with, he just felt more comfortable with her than even his old friends.
“I quit racing after the accident,” he acknowledged. “I don’t know how much you know about Formula One racing but it’s different than NASCAR. Two drivers from each team drive together during a round. So my brother and I were basically partners, both trying to nudge the other up in the ranks to get more points for the team as a whole. He wanted to retire that year but I made him keep going.” He met her eyes, wanting to see her face free of judgment before he told her the whole ugly truth of himself. “And then he died on the track all because I wasn’t ready to give up the lifestyle.”
A corner of Blair’s mouth tugged downward and he steeled against his own disappointment. But then she said, “You’re too smart to blame yourself for your brother’s death, Cole.” His heart beat again. “But I can tell you do and while I have wished death by fire upon you, I have to say that if your brother was anything like you, if he’d wanted something badly enough he would have done it, not let you push him into continuing to race instead.”
Cole opened his mouth to disagree except that she was probably right about that. But it didn’t mean anything because Cole had been seriously persuasive when Scott had brought up retiring, and like Cole himself would have done for him, Scott would have done anything for Cole. Which had ultimately led to his own death and left Cole picking up the pieces of his life, while trying to rebuild his broken family.
“Yeah, well, the rest of my family doesn’t seem to think so,” he said wryly, taking a hefty drink of wine. “So maybe you could shoot them a friendly email for me and plead my case.”
Blair’s eyes widened. “What do you mean? They don’t talk to you?”
“They do, they do,” Cole assured, not wanting her to get the wrong idea or paint himself as too much of a martyr. He was, after all, the villain of his own life. At least as far as his family was concerned. “I was always the outcast of the family. So when they knew Scott wanted to retire and come back home to Louisiana they were thrilled, but then when I talked him out of it they were already upset that I’d committed us to another year of traveling nonstop. Then when it ultimately resulted in his death, you can imagine how they felt.”
Blair took his hand then and he felt guilty for liking it so much. Guilty that he was getting the thing that he wanted all because he was sharing the story of his shame. “But you want to open a winery at home,” Blair said, thoughtful. “So you’re trying to mend fences with them.”
Cole scrubbed at the back of his neck, uncomfortable with all the talk about his life. “They’re not mad. Things just aren’t the same. Like, they love me like they always did, but for my parents it’s clouded by the loss of their son, and for my sister, her brother. Time is what it’ll take to heal, but I intend to do what I can to smooth it along so we can be a happy family again.” He’d already bought his parents and his sister new houses, new cars, beach vacations—anything he thought might make amends, but even after two years things just didn’t feel the same. The truth was without Scott, things would always be different, Cole just hoped that one day it wouldn’t feel like his fault anymore. “I thought maybe I’d start a winery as a way to move home and try to rebuild the family.”
“Well, if you need hands-on help, I’m happy to send Nate with you to Louisiana. I could really use a vacation from him around here,” she said, thankfully lightening the mood. “Last week he made me post an informational video on fermentation on social media. As if that’s what I want to be doing with my time.” She rolled her eyes and he smiled. “Creating content.”
“I’d love to see you talk about fermentation.”
Blair rolled her eyes. “I don’t know how you made that sound perverted, but you really have a gift for that kind of thing.”
“You won’t be surprised to hear that I’ve heard that before too,” he said, giving her hand a squeeze and at the same time pulling her forward a little. She raised an eyebrow, knowing what he was up to, but letting him get away with it. “Thank you for offering me your brother. I think after dealing with you he’d be counting his blessings to have me as a sibling.”
“You’re probably right,” she admitted, holding back laughter.
They were close now. He could feel her breath on the side of his neck and he wanted to lean forward and kiss her but thought better of it. The anticipation was good for now—let her think nothing was going to happen.
She reached out and took another sip of the wine and when she started to put the glass back on the table he took it from her hand instead, turned the glass to where the print of her lipstick was and drank from the same place. Watching her the entire time, he saw her eyes grow darker and then her frown appear. It was clear she was going to fight him to the end.
He placed the glass back on the table with a gentle click. “I know you don’t want to get involved, but I’m leaving tomorrow and who knows when I’ll be back. So honestly, what’s the harm in having a little fun, Blair?” Taking her other hand in his, he continued, “After all you’ve had to deal with, don’t you think you deserve some no-strings-attached fun for once?”
The look she gave him was bland and he knew he was laying it on thick, but now that the idea had taken root he was loath to let it go. Two years of celibacy did that to a person. This was the most he’d felt around a woman since his brother’s death. He’d tried to get back in the saddle, so to speak, even had taken women back to his hotel room before ultimately realizing that he couldn’t do it and sending them away. Maybe it was because Blair was so unlike the party girls who followed racing and looked at him with just a little bit of pity for his loss or how his family looked at him, like he was the person responsible for his brother’s death. Blair already made him feel like he had a purpose other than being a race car driver and that maybe just he, Cole, was enough to interest someone.
Which is why he laid all his cards on the table.
“I haven’t told anyone that my brother wanted to retire but I told you because—” he shrugged, unable to articulate the feeling of ease he’d felt with her instantly “—I guess I trust you.” He took a deep breath. “So I might also go ahead and admit that I haven’t slept with anyone for two years. And not because I haven’t had the opportunity, but because I haven’t been interested.”
Their eyes met but he had absolutely no idea how to read the expression on her face. He nearly grinned at the fact that he was working so hard to get a woman in bed. Past him would be laughing his fucking ass off. Present him, however, was too focused on, if nothing else, her joining him in a little fun where they could both forget all their shitty problems, whatever hers were, and enjoy each other. Future him, that poor bastard, was the one who needed to worry because if he looked too closely into why he was breaking his extended celibacy after all this time, he might have to admit that he might be interested in Blair for more than sex.
“And it’s as much of a shock to me as anything, but I’m into you, Blair. A lot.” He sighed, his gaze drifting away from hers before returning as he said, “After two years, it’s you.”
CHAPTER FIVE
BLAIR WASN’T AN exceptionally chatty person on the best of days, so while it wasn’t shocking that she didn’t respond to Cole right away, she did have to admit that she wanted to say something to him after he’d revealed his not sleeping with anyone for two years. And that she was the one who had finally compelled him to want to do so.
That was a lot of responsibility for one taciturn viticulturist to handle. The mountain of expectations that would accompany sleeping with someone after such a long dry spell was crushing! But the expectations weren’t the problem. Not really. The problem was her and the fact that she was probably still a little broken. If she’d thought she was improving, she had only to look to tonight and the fact that she’d had to bail on the party because she’d seen a mutual acquaintance of her ex and hadn’t been able to bear the brunt of the shame. Had the man known her ex was married and thought Blair was fine with betraying another woman? She didn’t know and she hadn’t been about to stick around and find out.
