The return of the cat, p.8
The Return of the Cat, page 8
“Edi, even if you found it, the cat could have killed you,” Dulcis says, her voice barely above a whisper. “Everything there could have killed you.”
“Or turned you into a worm,” adds Adamo.
“Look, I understand you think going to their camp was reckless and you’re right,” I begin, “but I knew what needed to be done. I couldn’t explain it to you because you wouldn’t have understood and would have stopped me going.”
“Too right,” Curt growls.
“King Armpit, or whatever his name is, called me the Realm Storyteller, and he’s right. Some things I just know and this is one of them. First, Alpha, you were right to send everyone away. Their camp is huge with too many serpents to count. We can’t fight them.”
“I could have told you that,” Curt pipes up.
“Do be quiet, nephew,” says Yelena, “and let go of her wrist. Now.” Curt drops my appendage like a hot coal. She nods at me. “Continue.”
“I found the mage cat.”
Dulcis sucks in an excited breath and leans towards me, face aglow. I knew my girl would like this sort of thing.
“UrRahUm.”
“Ur what?” asks Alpha.
“UrRahUm. That’s his name.”
“How do you know?”
“He told me.”
“He changed into a man?”
Alpha is all questions and I don’t have time for them.
“No, he spoke to me as a cat.” I hold up a palm to make him hush while I continue. “He’s held prisoner in a covered cage. Armpit uses an amulet to syphon off dark magic and that’s how he grows so large and spews fire. When it drains, he goes back to a man via that slug thing. If we can break the cat out and smash the amulet, he promises he’ll help us defeat the serpents and we can all go home.”
“Of course he does,” Curt sneers.
“Don’t give me that face,” I tell my recalcitrant mate. “I got here with a magic book, remember. I don’t want to hide for the rest of my life in freezing cold trees or caves, pooping in the mud. Even if it’s with you. I want our lodge back. I want you to build me a nice warm lodge with a spiral staircase, indoor plumbing and a rocking chair. Understand?”
“I’m not making you anything,” he mutters. “You left me. Again.”
“Look on the bright side,” I reply. “I didn’t go with Anguis.”
The eponymous snake tuts and tosses long blond hair over his shoulder. “I’m angry with you too.”
“Who cares?” Curt snarls.
Yelena scowls at her nephew. “Stop speaking; you’re annoying me.” She turns to me. “So, if I’m understanding correctly, in return for the cat unleashing magic on the serpents, he requires us to break him out of his prison and destroy the, what was it, amulet?”
“Yes,” I agree. “And let him roam free.”
“Of course. Why not?” says Curt, ladling on the sarcasm.
“What if he’s dangerous?” Anguis asks. “There’s no reason to believe he’s telling the truth. We could release him and he runs away, or turns on us.”
“All true,” I agree. “But he’s our only chance to beat the serpents. He may be bonkers, but I believe he’ll help us. He’s a captive, so he’s got no love for the serpents and besides, it’s better than slavery or running forever. All we have to do is kidnap the cat. Very, very quietly. Oh and there’s one more thing.”
“There always is,” Curt growls and his auntie scowls him into submission.
“The amulet’s on a cursed chain which can only be broken by another serpent.”
“Me,” says Anguis, jumping in before I finish the last syllable. “I’ll do it.”
“She said serpent, my friend.” All eyes swivel to King Serpen. “And that means me. Well, it was time I made myself useful. I’m with you.”
“Serpen...” his ambassador begins.
“I left that castle for a reason, Anguis. Your job is to take care of our people and my Sospa.”
“No-one has decided anything yet,” states Alpha.
“One more thing, part two,” I offer, ignoring Curt rolling his eyes. “Whilst our serpent breaks his chain, I have to tell a story.”
Adamo guffaws.
“I’m trying very hard to go with you on this,” says Yelena, “but there are limits.”
“That’s the magic. I’m not making this up.” The thought flashes through my mind that ‘making it up’ is precisely what I’m doing, if I’m the Realm Storyteller, but I keep that to myself. “It’s what the cat told me.”
“So it must be true,” Curt mutters.
His sarcasm is getting on my nerves.
“Hmmm,” rumbles Ursid, staring me down. I look away from his accusing gaze. “I have no idea why, since it’s ridiculous, but I believe you.” My eyes shoot back to his with gratitude. “Doesn’t mean I’m happy with you,” he says, frowning. “Wings, what do you think?”
“There were hundreds, if not a thousand serpents down there,” the birdman replies. “Edi’s as mad as a pack of dancing wolves in slippers, but I believe her about the cat. Which makes me a very sad old bird.”
“I can’t believe I’m agreeing,” says Ursid. “About the cat, not you being sad.”
“I vote yes,” chirps Dulcis, sticking up a hand.
“Me too,” agrees Adamo.
“Nobody’s voting on anything,” growls Alpha.
“I thought we agreed on a council?” says Primus, interjecting for the first time.
“With the final decision resting with me,” Alpha insists. “I’m not risking our entire pack on this madness.”
“No, you’re not,” I agree. That shocks him. “You should all move south and hide, as decided. Only me, Serpen and Wings have to do this. Sorry guys.” I nod at the former king and the eagle.
“Are you trying to make me howl at you?” Curt pretty much howls.
“I love you, Mange, but you can’t help me on this one. And we don’t have time to argue. That amulet will soon be ready for their king and they’ll all be coming with him.”
“I can fly you and Serpen there,” says Wings, “but how are we getting the cat and the both of you back here? I can’t carry three of you.”
Oh. I hadn’t thought of that.
“From the look on your face, I guess you need another eagle,” says Wings.
Gulid’s feathers slump on the spot.
“It has to be your choice, Gulid,” I tell him. “It’s dangerous.”
He squawks, slaps himself in the beak with a wing, sighs, then nods his head.
“Exactly how big is this cat?” Anguis asks.
Another good question.
“He’s a sabre tooth tiger, lion,” I state, remembering the mane. “ Or both. A big one.”
“Well, I’ve no idea what a tigerlion is,” says Yelena. “Anyone else?”
Blank faces give her the answer.
“He’s very, very big,” I offer. “Maybe the size of three Ursids.”
“That’s not too...” Wings begins.
“As a bear,” I finish.
Gulid slumps even further, dragging his wings in the mud.
“Can’t he change to human?” Anguis asks, ever the purveyor of sensible questions.
“No, he can’t. He spoke to me as a cat. Told me he can’t change.”
“But if he’s a cat, can’t he run out on his own?” the ambassador adds, still reaching for a solution.
“No again,” I reply, sadly. “The amulet’s hurt him and he hasn’t run for a long time.”
“Then I won’t be able to fly him out alone,” says Wings. “If he’s that heavy, it’ll take both myself and Gulid to carry him.”
“Wonderful,” mutters Serpen, glancing at me. “We seem to be walking back.”
“I still haven’t made a decision,” states Alpha, but no-one’s listening to him.
“This is where we come in,” warbles Adamo, bobbing up and down on his heels. “The Bear Prince and his general to the rescue.”
“Pardon?” Ursid chokes.
“Wings carries Serpen and Edi,” Adamo qualifies, slapping his general on the back. “Gulid takes you and me. They rescue the cat. The eagles fly the cat out. Serpen and Edi ride you and me as bears until the birds come back for us.”
“You’re not as stupid as you look,” states Yelena.
“Thank you, Granny,” the ginger prince replies.
“That’s dangerous,” Dulcis points out, poking his broad chest.
“No worse than fighting that fire monster thingy,” he replies. “And I’m not doing the magic bit, just the scarper as fast as you can with a rider part. Even I can do that without tripping over. What do you say, Ursid?”
“When do I ever get any peace?” rumbles the general.
Lord, how I love this family.
“If she’s riding anyone, it’s me,” growls Curt. I try to cuddle him, but he steps out of my arms with a growl of disapproval.
“I’m sorry, my mate, but I’m too heavy for you to carry any distance,” I point out. “The bears can get me away further and faster. I want to come back to you.”
“I still haven’t agreed to this,” Alpha repeats, raising his voice to howl level.
“No one cares,” Yelena states, illustrating from whence Curt inherited his attitude. “I feel for both my nephews, in so far as I’m capable of feeling, but the human is right. She has to try. If this cat can defeat them, it’s our only chance. A slim one, but it’s a chance. And if she fails, we lose nothing.”
“Except her life,” Curt growls.
“And mine,” mutters Wings.
Gulid squawks and points a wing tip at himself.
“I’m sorry,” I tell them, “but we have to go now. Right now, before the serpents come at us. Everyone else go with the pack. We’ll find you at the caves.”
“No,” growls Curt, eyes filled with betrayal. “Do you not get what being a mate is?”
“Yes,” I tell him. “Please trust me, Mange. I know I’ve not given you reason to, but I’m begging you. I know this is right. Anything for the pack, remember?”
He backs away from me, but I spring forwards, catching him off guard and hugging him fiercely. “I love you,” I whisper in his ear and let him go.
Primus thrusts a large backpack into my arms. “For their clothes. Blessings be with you all.”
I want to cry and hug everyone, but there’s no time for such indulgence, except for one piece of information I owe my young friend. “Primus, Yelena, I’m sorry to tell you this, but Fidus and Decipa are with the serpents. I thought you should know.”
Primus grasps his grandmother’s hand and lifts his chin. “Then we need to beat them all the more. Go.”
Let’s fly,” I tell Wings, but it’s Gulid who grabs me in his right claw and takes to the air. He circles once and snatches up Serpen.
“I didn’t agree to this,” I hear Alpha yell.
Yet again, my mate stares up at me as I fly away from his embrace, his man howl of disbelief ringing across the ruined town.
CHAPTER 13
The Catnap
Soaring over the mountains, anchored in Gulid’s claw, unleashes a wave of frigid déjà vu. Clutching the empty backpack to my chest, I fill my mind with hopeful outcomes to this mission. It will work. We can free UrRahUm, defeat the serpents and come home. I’ll be happy with my wolf. I will.
I glance over at a straining Wings, flying beside us, dangling the bear contingent. Adamo gives me a cheery wave. I’m grateful for his optimism, even if it is fake. Ursid sports a visage set in concrete. I don’t blame him. Not so long ago I sat in an office, desperate for adventure and destiny. Well, here I am. The Realm Storyteller. Knees knocking in the wind.
We fly over the castle with its new mould coated makeover and I glance at Serpen’s expression. He remains impassive, despite the disturbing memories that must be warring inside him. He catches my gaze and offers up a gentle smile. It feels like forever since he sent me to a tower to freeze. How far we’ve come together. I pray Sospa never has to face the weight of her serpent heritage.
Knowing the route from the first flight, I’m prepared for the sight of the writhing multitude and the surreal angle of entry into the forest surrounding the enemy camp. Once my already cycling feet hit the ground, I sprint straight for those covering trees and friendly undergrowth. Two eagles and three men squeeze into the tiny area with me and I nod in the direction of the covered cart.
“We’re going there,” I whisper to Serpen, who’s staring at the thrashing mass of serpents inside the ring of frozen eagles. “Never seen another serpent?” I ask him.
“Only my own family. Never this many. What about the eagles?” he asks, snapping out of his fascination.
“I think they’re all mesmerised,” I tell him, spotting the eagle I turned over, still on his back in the mud. “They didn’t react to me before.”
Serpen prizes the backpack from my frozen clutches. “You two should change now,” he tells Adamo and Ursid. “We’ll need to make a swift exit.”
The quickest striptease in history results in two hulking bears holding their breath behind a tree, desperately endeavouring to manifest thinness. Whilst Serpen thrusts their clothes into the backpack, Gulid pokes me with a wing tip.
“You all stay here,” I tell the bear and eagle posse. “I’ll try to bring the cat to you. Grab him and fly straight out. Don’t look back. Ursid will save me.”
The general rumbles quietly and gently taps a paw on my head.
“I hope you plan on saving me,” Serpen tells Adamo.
The ginger prince gives a toothy grin and bounces a paw off Serpen’s forehead.
“Should I change here?” Serpen asks me, smoothing down his hair.
To be honest, I’m not sure of anything. “No, let’s get over there and see what he says to do. You might need hands.”
Serpen grabs the bulging backpack. “Lead on, then.”
“Why are you carrying that?” I ask.
“I’m not leaving my clothes in the dirt over there,” he replies, “I’m running out of decent coats.” He offers me his free hand. “Here’s to us and not getting eaten by anything.”
I shake it, glance back at the others for a nod of encouragement and creep forwards through the vegetation, heart pounding like a piledriver, Serpen behind me. We’ve reached the ring of statuesque eagles and are heading for the tarpaulin, when a candyfloss pink serpent with a face like a constipated gargoyle slithers around the cart. Serpen hurls himself behind a handily placed log. I, being a twit, don’t. In my defence, there’s no room for us both down there anyway, but that doesn’t explain why I think standing directly behind a frozen eagle, like his big bummed shadow, is a good idea. Wings has probably fainted watching this performance.
The sour faced bubblegum snake writhes past, bulk curling side to side, and bumps my shielding eagle. He tips over backwards into my face and I push him upright again. He rocks back and forth before regaining equilibrium. The oblivious serpent slithers on, somehow completely missing the most obvious interloper in history. My guardian angel must be working towards a promotion.
As I’m not planning on giving myself another heart attack, I nip out from behind the eagle and pelt across the mud, throwing myself under the tarpaulin and leaving Serpen to fend for himself. I might be hidden from sight in the sudden darkness, but hyperventilation makes me sound like an elephant with a sinus infection. Luckily, there doesn’t seem to be anyone in here with me. Excepting UrRahUm, I hope.
A ray of light shoots across the cage, illuminating a stripy sabre tooth tiger, complete with a fuzzy lion’s mane, spark out on his side, pink tongue draped over a yellowing tooth, a tufty patch of white fur beneath his chin. Every mage should have a beard.
Serpen ducks under the tarpaulin and sucks in a shocked breath as he catches sight of the cat. Unfortunately that beam of light lands right across the feline’s closed eyes. A ripple passes down his fur from nose to tail and a huge furry head rises from the bottom of the cage, half his mane flattened against his face. He shakes his head and the hair springs out, sticking up in all directions as though he’s been plugged into the mains, as he yowls, “I’m hungry.”
“Shut up,” a cranky voice hollers from outside.
The serpent and the human hold our breath, Serpen not daring to drop the tarpaulin back into place. We’ve turned purple before we’re sure the owner of that voice isn’t coming in here with us.
“Dum dum de dum,” UrRahUm sings, ending with a toothy yawn, the joined amulets swinging from the chain fixed to his neck. His bearded chin drops and he stares straight at me, whining, “I want to go home.”
Me too.
Serpen gulps, swallowing his next words. “You really are a cat.”
UrRahUm’s massive head stays still, but those huge eyes swivel to the snake, narrowing with suspicion.
“And who are you, reptile?” he growls.
“How do you know I’m a snake?” Serpen asks.
“I can smell you,” the cat replies. “You all stink. Serpents worst of all.”
“We do not,” Serpen insists, choosing the worst time to become precious. “I’ll have you know I’m very clean.”
“Does it matter, right now?” I whisper. “UrRahUm meet Serpen. He’s a friend and a full serpent. We’re here to break you out.”
“Snakes aren’t friends to anyone,” the cat spits, “except themselves.”
“That may have been true once,” Serpen replies, “but times change.”
I step closer to the cage. “Serpen gave up his crown to live with us. You can trust him and he’s all we’ve got.”
“Are all your snakes puny, once king?” asks UrRahUm, not giving an inch.
Serpen stares down his antagonist. “My snakes are worth ten thousand of me. If you ever stop insulting us, you might realise I’m here to help you. If I can.”
UrRahUm snorts and flicks his tail against the bars. “We shall see.” His head suddenly snaps to attention and he sniffs the air. “The mouldy king is coming and I don’t mean you, snakelet. Hide behind me.”
