“Pepper, hold on,” Carl says apologetically, holding his hands up. “Listen, I didn’t want things to end like that. Me and Karly, that was the only time we ever—”

  “Don’t. Fucking. Lie to me, Carl!” I hiss before yanking my arm free of his and stepping away. “We’re done, do you hear me? You got what you wanted. I never want to see your face again.”

  He doesn’t stop me this time as I get into my car. Once inside, I emphatically lock the doors before peeling out of the college parking lot, tires screeching. I drive for fifteen minutes, going nowhere in particular. My vision is red and my hands are shaking on the wheel.

  But then inspiration hits and with newfound determination, I grit my teeth and pull up before a local bar. The Salty Lagoon isn’t exactly a nice place, but a dank, divey hole in the wall is exactly what I need right now. Still angry, I get out, slam the door, and storm inside.

  2

  Pepper

  * * *

  After one beer, the nightmare still hasn’t gone away. Fuck. I can still see Karly’s eyes roll back in her head as Carl dicks her hard. I’m going to need more alcohol if I want to forget what I saw.

  Luckily for me, Jessa is the bartender tonight. Her curly red hair is piled high in a bun at the top of her head, and she’s got a cute sprinkling of freckles on her nose. She can tell something is wrong with me, but then of course, I’m not exactly hiding it. The bartender doesn’t pry, but she does wait for a few patrons to leave before she leans forward.

  Her eyelids are covered in shimmery blue makeup that contrasts prettily against her hair. Her faux lashes stick out almost an inch from her face, and glimmer with silver glitter. Her tits are pushed up toward her neck and press against her top. It’s not her usual look, I know, but it’s how her boss likes his bartenders to look: like a wench. If I weren’t totally down right now, I’d commiserate with her. No one could be comfortable in that tight corset.

  “Hey, Pep,” she says. “What’s wrong?”

  I shake my head and push my fingers through my hair. My hat lies against the bar next to me soaking up some kind of alcoholic substance that someone spilled, but I can’t bring myself to care.

  “I’m a fucking idiot, Jessa,” I say. “I can’t believe I thought he loved me.”

  She’s confused for a second, but then it clicks in her brain. Her pretty face gets serious as she leans even closer. “What did Carl do?”

  I sigh, and to my horror, a tear trickles down my cheek.

  “I went to surprise him after practice. I waited for, like, an hour for him, but he wouldn’t come out. I actually went into the locker room to find out what was going on, and you know what I see?”

  “Tell me.”

  “I see that son of a bitch fucking some cheerleader’s brains out!”

  Jessa’s eyes widen, and she presses her hand to her mouth. “Oh, honey, I’m so, so sorry.”

  I wave away her condolences. “I don’t want pity, Jess. I just want another beer.”

  She nods and bends below the counter to get me another. She takes a bottle opener and removes the cap in one expert flick of her wrist before sliding it across the bar.

  “Let me know if I can get you anything else, hon.”

  “You’re a life saver, Jess.” I put the cool bottle against my lips and take a long pull. The liquid slides like ice down my throat and settles in my empty stomach.

  But two beers in, I still remember the smell of musk and steam in the locker rooms. Why am I so surprised? I knew being with Carl was a long shot. Let’s face it: hunky football players aren’t exactly into short, chubby nerds. Why didn’t I read into the long bouts where he wouldn’t text me back no matter how many times I texted him? How could I miss the fact that he’s always been strangely vague about his whereabouts when I ask?

  I turn my head at the sound of someone entering the bar. To my dismay, it’s Trent, and my emotions rush up again.

  “Hey, Jess, watch this for me,” I say. Then, like a banshee on a warpath, I begin to approach my prey. Trent sees me coming, and he raises his hands in surrender. He starts to back out of the bar, but it’s too late.

  “Hey!” I shout as I follow him outside. “Thanks for telling me that my boyfriend is a cheating bastard! I really appreciate the heads up.”

  “I tried to warn you, Pepper.” He has his car door open now, but he hasn’t gotten inside yet. “I really did.” The look on his face is ashamed, but I don’t care. I’m too drunk to really focus on anything except my own rage.

  “No. You did everything you could to keep Carl’s secret and to keep me from finding out the truth.”

  He gives me a helpless look, his hand tightening on the car door. “He’s my teammate, Pepper. I can’t just sell him out.”

  I laugh because if I don’t, I’ll cry. “Yeah, you’re all so loyal. You’re all so there for each other. Brotherhood and all that bullshit, right? But when it comes to someone else, a girl maybe … well, she doesn’t matter at all, does she?”

  Trent just stands there, unable to say anything in reply. He doesn’t have to because his silence is enough of an answer.

  “Fuck you for helping him keep his dirty secret, Trent.”

  I whirl away with tears in my eyes, and the only sound in my ears is the echo of my words.

  After three beers, the memory of Carl’s voice is starting to seem far away.

  Of course he wasn’t really interested in me. Karly is tall, beautiful, and she’s in killer shape with cheerleader legs. I, on the other hand, am just so ugly and fat. Did I ever deserve him in the first place? I know I’ll never have another man as handsome as Carl love me.

  “Pepper, you know that’s not true,” Jessa says with a worried look.

  Was I speaking out loud? I didn’t even notice. I must be well on my way to getting drunk, but at least I can still see straight.

  “It is true, Jess.” I hate how whiny my voice is, but I can’t stop myself. “I just wish I could go back in time and tell myself not to date him.”

  She lays her hand on top of mine. Her fingers are cold from handling so many drinks, but they squeeze mine reassuringly. “I get that, hon, but why don’t you try taking this as a learning experience? Now you’ll never fall for someone like Carl ever again. I know it hurts, but you’re going to come out of this smarter and stronger.”

  “I don’t know, Jess…”

  “I do. You’re beautiful, Pepper. There will be other guys, and unlike that asshole, they’ll treat you the way you deserve.”

  “Do you really think so? Or are you just trying to cheer me up?” I want to believe her. I really do. But my heart just feels so heavy in my chest. I can’t see this as anything but a loss. The pretty bartender smiles sympathetically.

  “Can’t it be both? I know that there are plenty of men out there who would throw themselves at your feet, and I’m telling you this because it’s true. You need to love yourself, Pepper.”

  The words strike a chord somewhere deep inside me. I still just want to die, but could learning to love myself really help me? Maybe it will. Someday. I smile blearily.

  “Right now, Jess, I feel like I need to do something crazy to get over him.” She grins.

  “Maybe you should listen to that feeling. As long as you’re not trying to get yourself killed, maybe a little fun is just what you need.”

  “But what should I do?”

  Jess shrugs. “Maybe you should try having a one-night stand. There’s nothing like some hot loving from a stranger to get your head back in the game. Maybe another beer feels good right now, but this will be your last one, okay? And then I want you to call a taxi or an Uber or something to get yourself home.”

  I nod, and she slips one more bottle across the bar.

  But while sipping the drink, the image of Carl and Karly’s bodies heaving together comes up again, and vomit literally begins to rise in my throat. That’s enough. I pay for my beers with a couple of twenties, and then push away from the bar and head outside. The sky has turned the orange of a dying flame as the sun sets. It’s dusk now, but I feel strangely lucid, like I’m in some kind of waking dream.

  I stumble against my car, but then I remember Jessa’s warning. I should call an Uber to get home. I fumble with my phone for a bit, hitting random buttons. Where’s the Uber app on this damn thing? But then, the flashing lights of an ambulance parked across the street catches my eye and inspiration strikes.

  Wouldn’t it be fun if I took that thing out on a joyride? Jessa did say I need a bit of fun in my life, right? Of course, she meant dating-wise, but I see opportunity right now.

  The thought propels me from my car, across the street, and into the driver’s seat of the ambulance before I can think twice. I look around blearily for the keys before I realize they’re still in the ignition. Hell yeah, this was meant to be. Not only that, but there’s no sign of the paramedics who must be in charge of this thing. Trembling, I let my hand take hold of the keys and turn the engine on. My grin spreads so wide, it threatens to spit my face in two. Perfect. I’ll be back before anyone realizes I’m gone.

  3

  Rob

  * * *

  Sam Nelson and I pull up to Prescott’s senior center just as the sky starts to glow with dusk. He kills the siren and pulls the parking brake on the ambulance. He gets out first, and frankly, my buddy looks like he’d rather be anywhere else but here. We’ve been partners for twelve years now, and I can read his every thought without saying a word.

  I get it though. I have a pretty good idea of what to expect because sometimes the scene at senior centers can be depressing. The patients are old and occasionally, there’s nothing to do but to let them pass in peace.

  This time, however, we know it’s not that. Mrs. Wheatley has mild asthma, and when she feels the staff at the senior center isn’t paying her enough attention, she has “trouble” breathing and nothing that anyone does can calm her down except for Sam’s attention. It’s a selective asthma attack for the Mrs. Wheatley because she’s got a thing for blonde, blue-eyed men, especially ones who look like they could be on the cover of a romance novel. And to her credit, Sam looks like he could be a model. Poor guy. He’s attracting the attention of women in their 80’s when he’d much rather be solving real emergencies.

  I don’t blame him for being annoyed, but then again, Mrs. Wheatley’s harmless, and if I’m being honest, it’s hilarious to watch her try to squeeze Sam’s cheeks as he coaches her on how to catch her breath. And I don’t mean the ones on his face. I mean the cheeks down there.

  “Look alive, kid,” I say, slapping Sam on the back. “It’s our last shift of the night.”

  “Easy for you to say,” he scowls before sighing. “You’re not the one who gets groped every time we come here.”

  “Fair enough. But chin up, we’ll be in and out before you know it. Besides, maybe she’ll spare you this time.”

  He shoots me a look. He and I both know that Mrs. Wheatley won’t, and I turn my face away to keep him from seeing my grin.

  We enter the senior center, and the staff leads us to the recreation room, where a small crowd has gathered around Mrs. Wheatley’s wheelchair. She has her hand placed against her chest in her typically overdramatic fashion, and she’s bent forward, trying to catch her breath. Sam, looking very serious, kneels next to her and takes out his stethoscope. He presses it against her back in various places, listening for what he knows will be perfectly functioning lungs.

  When he’s satisfied, he removes the stethoscope and tells Mrs. Wheatley to remember to use her inhaler whenever she experiences symptoms. The gray-haired lady nods, and when he stands up, sure enough, her hand shoots out to try and grab his ass. He easily avoids the attempted grope, and returns to my side with a pained smile.

  I’m ready to tease him as we exit the building, but then both of us stop short. The hell? We step outside right in time to see our ambulance screeching off down the street, red lights flashing. What the fuck is going on? Who in their right mind steals an ambulance?

  Sam and I sprint down the street, yelling and waving our arms after the disappearing bus. It gets to the end of the street before slowing and eventually stops, pulling over to the curb. I get to the driver’s side and yank open the door, prepared to read the riot act to this stupid-ass clown, but to my surprise, it’s Pepper, my daughter’s best friend, at the wheel.

  “Pepper?” I ask, dumbfounded. “What are you doing?”

  She turns to me and smiles like the cat that’s just eaten the canary. She’s gorgeous, even if the smell of alcohol is strong in the air. Her curly hair bounces, and her cheeks are flushed. Her breasts look like ripe melons beneath her t-shirt and my fingers itch to squeeze them, even if it’s utterly inappropriate at the moment.

  “Hey, Mr. Trainor,” she slurs. “Sorry, is this your ambulance?” And then she laughs like she’s made a great joke.

  I shake my head. I’ve known this girl for years, if not a full decade. I remember her as a stick-thin, freckled kid with messy brown locks who used to follow my daughter around like a shadow. Now though, she’s grown. In the past five years or so, she’s turned into a full-figured Venus. God, I shouldn’t be thinking about her like this, especially when she’s drunk. Yes, Pepper’s gorgeous, but she’s the same age as my daughter. It’s entirely wrong for me to think of her as anything more than my daughter’s friend.

  Still, I can’t help but smile a little as I help her out of the ambulance. She stumbles against me, pressing her big breasts against my chest.

  “Oops!” she slurs, looking up into my face, still smiling from ear to ear. She kept her auburn hair short all through high school, but now it’s grown out and curls delicately around her heart-shaped face. Suddenly, I’m taken by the urge to run my hand across her cheek, but Sam’s voice cuts through my dreamy haze.

  “What the fuck were you doing?” he shouts. “You think you can just take this ambulance and do whatever you want? There could have been lives at stake!”

  “I…” she blinks at him, and then frowns. “I was only going to keep it for a little while—”

  “Are you stupid? Did no one teach you not to take things that aren’t yours?” he asks angrily.

  I know he’s right to be pissed, and I know that Pepper deserves to get an earful not only from him but from me as well, but when she flinches, my instincts flare. I want to protect her.

  “Sam, I think she gets the point,” I say pointedly. “Back the fuck down.” But my partner’s on a rampage.

  “No, I don’t think she gets it at all. When I get the police involved, maybe she will after a night in jail and a felony charge. You know that’s what happens after you steal an ambulance right?”

  Pepper blinks slowly at him.

  “Wha …?” she slurs. Oh shit. I need to take over and I throw my partner a stern look. “No police.”

  This time, Sam looks flabbergasted, his handsome face pulling into a frown.

  “What? Are you fucking kidding me? She’s a felon!”

  I nod.

  “Yeah, but I know her. She’s not a bad kid. She went to school with my daughter, Mindy. I’ll take her home, and I’ll help her get sober. No one this young deserves to have a felony charge for a stupid mistake.”

  Sam shakes his head. “This goes against everything you’ve ever taught me, Rob. If this were anyone else, you’d have them in the slammer in a sec.”

  I nod.

  “You’re not wrong, but again, I know her. I can’t let this get on her record because she’s my daughter’s childhood friend.” He doesn’t seem convinced. “Listen, I’ll owe you, okay? You name it, I’ll do it.”

  Sam thinks for a moment.

  “You can’t tease me about Mrs. Wheatley anymore.”

  “Fine.”

  He raises his hand. “I’m not done. And you have to promise that when we get calls to come out here, you’ll handle her instead of me. And you’ll still owe me a favor even after that.”

  I close my eyes briefly. “You drive a hard bargain, kid. But fine, I’ll agree to your terms.”

  “Good.” He grins. “Glad you see things my way.” Then, he looks back at Pepper, and grimaces. “I still think you’re making a mistake, Rob.”

  “You’re not wrong, Sam. But I’m going to do it anyways.”

  With that, I help Pepper into the back of the ambulance, and Sam drives us to the hospital parking lot. By the time we get there, the sky is dark. He lets us off, gives me one last disapproving look, and then takes care of logging our vehicle in the system.

  Meanwhile, I usher Pepper to my car, but instead of taking her home, I take her to my place. After all, her parents shouldn’t see her in this inebriated state. Marcy and Peter White would completely freak out. Instead, I’ll take care of the curvy girl and make her feel better before the night is over.

  4

  Pepper

  * * *

  By the time Rob pulls up to his house, I’ve mostly sobered up. That other paramedic’s voice echoes in my head, accusing me of being stupid and selfish. He’s right of course. If they’d had a patient with an emergency, I really could have messed things up for them. I’m lucky to have had Rob there to intervene.

  I glance at him as he kills the engine. His handsome face is shrouded in darkness, and I can’t tell what his expression is or how angry he must be with me. No doubt he just sees me as one of Mindy’s silly friends out to make trouble. The worst part of it all is that I can’t even blame Carl for this one. I chose to steal the ambulance by myself, and it’s not as if Carl’s hands were there, forcing me. As desperate as I am to forget the entire night, I’m the one that got myself into this mess.

 

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