Until mercy happily ever.., p.5
Until Mercy: Happily Ever Alpha World, page 5
“I smell lasagna and garlic bread, my favorite.” She smirks at me. That hits me in the chest, makes my heart beat a bit faster.
“It still surprises me how much you love food and aren’t afraid to eat. You aren’t one of those girls who only eats salads.”
“Feminism. Don’t just assume all girls eat salad. We aren’t all high maintenance and prissy.” She takes a seat, and I stay standing, watching her give me some smart response, and I take the bait.
“Every girl I’ve dated was too afraid to eat in front of me then, because all they ever ordered was salad,” I say matter-of-factly, coming to join her.
“You dated women ashamed to be women, and that’s a shame. Listen, I like to eat, and that includes all the carbs. So feed me and keep me happy, and I might consider another cheesy, romantic date.” Mercy winks, and I swear if she makes me speechless again and I find myself stumbling over her, I don’t think I will make it a date; instead, it may be a wedding. She makes me feel an all-over ache, one I can’t pin or even fathom. It’s a type of control, a heart beating out of my chest with no stop in sight feeling. It’s a possessive kind of thing, and it doesn’t go away. No, it only deepens with each damn minute I spend with her.
“Tell me more about you,”TI prompt after a few minutes of comfortable silence. I didn’t know what to say to her last comment, but I did take enough time analyzing it in my head. Something I’ve never done with a woman before.
“That’s a broad question. What do you want to know?” She chuckles, taking a sip of her wine.
“All right, tell me about your family. Sisters? Brothers? Do they live here, or do they live somewhere else?” She takes another sip, and I see a small glint of sadness behind her eyes. I wish I could take that question back.
“I don’t have any siblings. I was an only child, and I don’t talk to my parents anymore. They didn’t support some of my decisions growing up.” I think she’s going to expand on that, but she doesn’t.
“And what could those have been?” I push a little deeper.
“I just ran around with the wrong crowd and they didn’t like it. It’s no big deal. But it’s all good. I made it out alive, right?” She gives me a soft smile, but I don’t buy it. Mercy wears all her emotions in her eyes; it’s the direct gate to that heart of hers, and no matter how strong she thinks her poker face is, her eyes give her away. “What about you? Family? Siblings?”
I let it go—for now.
“No, I was adopted when I was two. My parents said I was enough of a handful, so they only needed one.” I smile crookedly, thinking of my parents. They are crazy about one another still, have been since day one.
“What are they like?”
“My mom is hilarious—her name’s Maggie. I get my sarcasm from her. My dad is a little more serious. He’s a cop in Seattle, so when my mother and I get going and bust his balls, I swear he grows another gray hair. His name’s Devon, and he’s my best friend. I’m very much like him though, when it comes to being the alpha.”
“Alpha, huh? What exactly do you mean by being alpha?” she questions, leaning in closer to me.
I get a strong whiff of her scent and it takes me over. “When I’m sure of something, or when I want it and I know I’m right, I’ll keep it. I will treat it like glass and make it my greatest prize.” I lean in a little, following her lead while she watches my lips.
“So like a possession,” she remarks, now inches from me. I know we both want this first kiss, and I plan to make it one she never forgets and will never be able to live without.
“No, baby.” I touch her face, my large hands taking up nearly half her face. “Like a fucking treasure.” With that, I close the gap. I kiss those plump lips that taste like wine and her. I have played over and over in my head what her lips would taste like. They’re perfect, every bit of what she is to me, and I wish I could bottle that taste and sip that shit like whiskey whenever I want.
Our lips move in sync, softly and without pause. It’s so slow I feel every movement and soak it up. She whimpers when my hand cradles her face less gently, and I tilt my head just a bit more to touch every part of her mouth that I can.
“You taste good, Mercy,” I whisper against her lips, not giving her a second to respond. I’m so far gone with her, and I don’t even want her to get a word in otherwise. I want to be selfish and take this moment as far and as long as I can, because that’s what Mercy does; that’s who she is.
“Touch me and taste more of me.” She separates us with her words, and those bright blues turn three shades darker, her lips even plumper, and the arousal showing on her cheeks heats my skin.
What do I do now? I want to take this slow, but slow is too slow for me when it’s Mercy. I can’t go fast or slow enough. With her, I’m upside-down, bent backwards, and twisted. She’s in there. In my chest. In my head. Everywhere.
“You sure you’re ready for that, baby?”
“Don’t make me ask twice.”
I smirk and do no such thing. I’m showing Mercy what it’s like to be mine tonight—for always. Because I ain’t letting her slide from my hands after this.
Chapter Seven
Mercy
I shoot up from bed, gripping my chest and listening to the room thunder with the sound of my tears. You can hear my heartache echoing off the walls of this hotel. I made it as far as some Podunk town in Missouri before I had to stop, or I was going to risk my life and other drivers’ on the road. I plan to drive the rest of the way to a small town in Tennessee tomorrow. I was sure I was too tired to have dreams, but if one were to slip its way in, I thought it would be a nightmare about Link and the fact that he’s after me. That he found me again. But no. It wasn’t. It was Kellan. I dreamed of the night when we first made love. I swear I could feel it like he was right here next to me.
But he isn’t. In fact, I have no idea where he is or what life he created after I ran out on his in the middle of the night. Did he love again? Did he forgive what I did? Does he ever think of me and the things we shared? Does he still have my ring?
The flashing red motel sign lights bounce off the wall in a timed pattern as I lie back down, trying to take deep breaths. I try my hardest to not think of Link, because if I do, I won’t be able to fall back asleep and keep up the fight. The run.
So I think about the one good thing my life once had, the memories I have, and that dream comes washing back in again.
Kellan leans me back and I let him lead. He’s gentle with me. A soft touch isn’t just soft with Kellan; in fact, it’s the complete opposite. It may be gentle and he may be careful, but I feel every bit of strength and manliness in that touch. A possessive and demanding touch that lurks under his fingertips. I don’t know how he does it, but he does it so well, and I crave each second that comes next. I have no idea what kind of passion I’m going to feel tonight, but the logical side of my brain warns me, yet that stubborn heart of mine controls me.
I want Kellan to touch me in a way I have always desired for a real, good, and kind man to touch me. He has an alpha side, he says, and I believe it, but make no mistake: it’s all the good traits of an alpha that he possesses.
Link always said he was an alpha. My ex swore he was the ultimate, but he wasn’t. He was a monster. A monster in broad daylight.
“You’re thinking too much, gorgeous. I want you to be here with me.” Kellan pulls me back to the moment and I’m thankful, because I don’t want Link to ruin this moment. I don’t want to be that girl who misses out on the chance to really find love, because I let one man—the wrong man—in my life. I refuse to be his victim anymore.
“I am. I’m right here with you, handsome.” I place my hand over his heart, and I swear I feel it beat erratically, just like mine.
“You’re beautiful, simply perfect,” he whispers. Kissing me, his tongue moves against mine and I absorb the taste, and I know he’s doing it too. Just like his touch roaming over my body, his mouth does the same, learning me, invading me, making everything in my head disappear and become only about him.
Leaning back and away from me, he grabs my legs, our eyes never leaving one another. I yelp suddenly when he pulls them up and he scoots me against his thighs.
“Kellan.”
He gives me that cocky, charming, and extremely perfect smirk. “What do you want, baby?”
He knows what I want; it’s written all over me. I want him more and more, and I’m losing it with each passing moment.
“You.”
“How bad?”
I bite my lip and slowly bring my hands to his belt to undo it. “Bad.” I work on his belt and his button, and he reaches behind him to pull his white tee off effortlessly. I almost lose my breath he’s so perfectly defined and toned. He has a saying in another language tattooed on his side, and it stretches over his muscles. I touch it with my finger as I ask, “What does that say?” I trace over it again and again.
“Υπερασπίστε συτό του υόεσάτε με θάρρος άρροτιμή.”
“Is that Greek?”
“Yes, want to know what it means?”
I nod, my bottom lip caught between my teeth. My entire body is on fire. Scooting back from me, I whimper at the loss of him, but he doesn’t go far. Lifting my top to just below my breast, exposing my stomach, he leans down and leaves open-mouthed kisses above the waistband of my jeans. My stomach tightens, and I moan out his name, the room feeling smaller, as if it were closing in on us.
“It says, Defend what you love with courage and honor.” A different feeling transpires in me with the whisper of those words, and it both frightens me beyond compare and thrills me.
“And what do you love?”
“You sure you want to know that?” I don’t know if I’m ready to hear it, but here it comes, and I don’t fight this. I want to say “I love you” to the man I have come to love. “Because once I say this, you won’t be able to get away from me. You become mine, baby.”
“Then say it. Make me yours.”
“Fuck, Mercy. I love you. You’re mine. You’ve been mine since the second I laid eyes on you.”
I search his eyes and I see it. I see the redemption I’ve been seeking, the forgiveness and love I’ve been looking for since I lost everything to the man I thought stole that chance from me. But here and now, I see he never took my heart completely. He can’t touch me and Kellan, and he can’t hurt me anymore. I will do whatever I can to make sure that what Kellan and I have never gets hurt—that nothing taints it.
“I love you, Kellan.”
There’s that passion in his eyes, that light, the salvation, and I surrender to it.
“You have me on my knees, Mercy. I’ve never wanted to love and protect something as much as I do you. I’ve never wanted anything to be mine more than I you. Don’t you dare think I will let this slip from my hands.”
With his words, he takes me. He removes each item of clothing from us both in a skilled way that seems never ending but fast, and before I know it, our skin is touching, his warm cock is hard, and I know this is going to hurt he’s so big.
Our lips melt against the other’s as our hands explore each other’s body, my palms smoothing over his defined shoulders and up in his hair, his squeezing my breast as his other arm braces beside my head.
“Say it again, Mercy. Tell me you love me,” he demands, his hand moving to my core, and my back leaves the floor as he plays with my clit. I writhe beneath his skilled fingers while they move in a steady, firm, circular motion. His intense stare has me by the throat and I can’t let the words slip out, and this just increases his speed.
“Oh!”
“Say it, baby. I won’t let you have me until you tell me you’re mine. Tell me you want this.”
I submit to the orgasm with black dots in my blurry vision. “I want you, all of you. I want to be yours; make me yours.”
I’m not ready for what happens next, but the second he sits up and grabs my hips, I know this is it.
“Look at that tight stomach, your sexy tits. These tiny thighs. You were made for me.”
His words are building up that coil in my belly again, and I can’t help but cry out his name. It’s a plea. I can’t wait anymore. I want to feel the touch of a real man, of a real lover. Of Kellan. And he shows me. Slowly, he glides me onto his cock, his hands controlling me by my hips. I feel every inch, skin on hot skin. I want to grab for something, but all I can reach from this angle is the blanket under my hands.
He stretches me around him, and the pain dissipates and grows into pleasure as I grip the blanket harder, my eyes on our connection.
“No, baby. You need something to hold, you just gotta tell me, sweet thing.” Sitting back on his calves, he pulls me up, one hand leaving my hip and reaching around to slide up my spine, leaving a trail off goose bumps in its wake.
Bringing my chest to his, our eyes lock and we speak for a moment without words. I use my thighs as best as I can to slowly rock and circle my hips. My heavy breathing mixes with his groans. I feel them in his chest, my small movements enough to drive him wild, and the knowledge that I’m pleasure the man I just professed my love to makes my desire more driven and fueled.
“You’ve never had it like this, have you, baby?”
I roll my head against his, sweat beginning to create a light sheen over our bodies. I can’t speak. I’m entranced. I can’t let my eyes leave his. I’ve never been connected with someone else this emotionally or physically, and I don’t ever want this feeling to stop. I can’t ever let this feeling stop.
“You won’t ever have it with anyone but me, Mercy. Now let go and don’t worry; this isn’t the end. I promise I will give you this every damn day, baby. Let go.”
I trust in him and I lean into it, lean into the fall.
I bend back, picking up speed, my head dropping backward, my body feeling everything he’s giving. His hands meet in the center of my back and I feel it from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. Every inch of his touch is sensual, and it deepens the sensations. He takes my nipple into his mouth, biting, licking, and sucking.
“Kellan, I’m not on the pill.” I struggle to get the words out, but I have to keep some sense in the equation.
“I don’t have a condom, fuck.” He starts to pull out and I protest, coming back up and wrapping my arms around his shoulders.
“I don’t care. Don’t stop this.” I kiss his lips then his chin then his neck.
“You could get pregnant, baby.” Reaching down, he grabs a handful of my ass and slams up into me.
“That doesn’t look like it’s stopping you.” I smirk, and he pounds into me again while he nips lightly at my neck. I know I should stop him, but I can’t do it. I want all of it, and I can kiss my sense goodbye.
“I don’t care. It won’t stop me. It’s only a matter of time before you give me a family.”
“Kellan!” I laugh.
“What? I warned you. Mine now.”
“You caveman.”
“Your caveman. Now give me those lips.”
We don’t use words anymore, and within minutes, I reach the brink. “Kellan! Kellan!” I forget where we are for a brief moment and lose every care that others in this building might hear us.
“Not yet, baby. You come with me.” He slows down and holds my hips in place so I can’t control the movements. He’s holding off and I don’t want him to. I can’t wait any longer.
“Kellan, please.”
“You trying to call the shots, baby?”
“Yes! Please, you have me—all of me. Don’t make me wait.”
“Look at me then. Let me see those eyes.”
My eyes fly open. I would give in to any demand right now.
“Don’t close your eyes. I want to see you when you come. I love you, Mercy.”
“I love you too.” I come with those words falling off my tongue, finally feeling safe and giving in to my love for him.
“Fuck. Fuck.” He groans out his orgasm, and in that look, I seal my fate. I am Kellan Ford’s. I won’t ever be able to run from him, and I hope I never have to.
All I have are memories—ones I’m so thankful I made, but even more fearful that I did. I can’t outrun those, and I don’t know what’s worse: having the memories of loving, or knowing I have only memories left and will never heal from the heartache of letting go of the one man who showed me what love is and how to trust the good again. But even if we were to cross paths again one day—which I’m sure is unlikely—he wouldn’t be able to look me in the eye.
I broke his heart and severed him down the middle. I wouldn’t be able to look at me either—most days I can’t—after what I did, so how could I ever expect him to?
I stole his happiness and left with no mercy.
I snort at the thought. How ironic—a girl fit perfectly for her name.
“Idiot,” I whisper into the night, throwing off the sheet and climbing out of bed. I go to the bathroom and start a hot shower, needing to wash away everything from the day and get myself on the road again. I want to make it to Tennessee so I can start this miserable cycle all over again. I miss Seattle. I miss Lana and Shayla. I miss Kingston and Trey and their crazy banter. I just miss home.
Washing my hair, I think about why I picked Tennessee, when I know damn well what it will do to me. Kellan has friends and family here. He talked about this being one of his favorite places, so here I go, adding fuel to my flames. Surrounding myself with what I lost and can’t ever get back.
“That’s wise, Merc,” I talk to myself for the hundredth time.
I could have called my parents, told them everything and begged them to help, but home would be the first place he would go. And though my parents and I didn’t end on good terms and they pushed me out, I don’t blame them, and I don’t want anything to happen to them or anyone. I feel guilty for leaving Lana and Shayla high and dry without a word. I cut them off before I could tell them I was truly, truly sorry. Basically, I’m the walking ad for the worst person in the world.
