“Fine, but give me your dirty uniform.”

  “Maybe I’ll take it to my parents, they have a washer and dryer.”

  “Are you trying to spare me?”

  “Yes, no reason for you to strain yourself.”

  “I always dreamed of washing army clothes. And now my love, my soldier, wants to stop me from fulfilling that dream?”

  “Do you have other dreams?”

  “Yes – to shower with a soldier, undress a soldier, sleep with a soldier, be with a soldier. Want more?” she teased, studying me up close.

  There was no way to resist her green eyes…

  “When all my friends were in the army, I was in hospitals, you know? When they told me about their army experiences, I was jealous. I’d go home and cry.”

  “I love you so much, Lily. I want you so much.”

  I hadn’t yet said “my wife, my woman,” but I knew there was time. I longed to strip and let my beloved take care of me as she wished, but my sense of responsibility toward my parents was stronger than everything. I hugged her, pulling a childish apologetic face. She gave me a knowing look as I dialed. My mother answered.

  “Mom.”

  “Who is this? Eli?”

  “No, Michael.”

  “Oh, I don’t believe it! Where are you?”

  “In Tel-Aviv with Lily.”

  “When will you come to us?”

  “Later. I just got home.”

  “Bring me your uniform and dirty clothes before Shabbat.”

  “Mom, Lily will wash and iron them.”

  “What is she?”

  “Mom, Lily will take care of it.”

  “But I’m your mother.” I knew this was coming, and I knew food would come up next.

  “Where’s Dad?” I steered the subject away from laundry, though not from the heart of it.

  “He’s not back from work yet. I made dinner.”

  “I’m sure.”

  “Will you come with Lily?”

  “What do you think?”

  “I don’t know. You with all your girlfriends.”

  “Mom, Lily will come with me.” Lily stood next to me, touching, longing, and I refused to let go.

  Toward evening, I woke up from her caress, her fingers stroking my short hair.

  “It’s already six o’clock! I can’t believe it!” I mumbled in alarm when I saw the clock.

  “You fell asleep right away.”

  “Why didn’t you wake me?”

  “I sat and watched you. You slept so deeply. And I love you so much.”

  “And I love you!”

  Chapter 24

  At My Parents’ House

  On the way to my parents’ house, Lily voiced her concern that my brother might recognize her – that maybe he had been at a conference at New-Hope Medical Center and seen her there by chance, or that… I cut her off before she finished the sentence and reassured her that the chances were slim to none.

  “So maybe he’ll notice that I’m sick…” She didn’t seem comforted.

  “Lily, so what if Eli is a doctor? It’s not written across your forehead. You look healthy and radiant,” I insisted.

  “But still – he’s a doctor. He’ll probably sense that something’s wrong with me,” she said anxiously.

  “There’s no such thing, and he has no reason to suspect you’re sick.”

  “You know what happens to me when I get nervous,” she pressed.

  “So you’ll blush a little. No one will think twice. I know him.” Lily fell silent but still looked uneasy.

  The introduction between Eli, his wife Joan, and Lily was brief. Dinner went more smoothly than I expected. Rachel, Eli, and Joan carried most of the conversation, occasionally including Lily and me. But from the corner of my eye, I noticed my mother’s frustrated glances at Lily’s almost untouched plate. I knew she would later have something to say about how “your girlfriend didn’t eat any of the special food I made just for her.” But there was nothing I could do – Lily had to follow a strict diet, which she broke only on rare occasions. The tension she felt about meeting my brother, the doctor, surely didn’t help her appetite.

  “Your girlfriend is stunningly beautiful,” my brother told me the first chance we were alone.

  “I know, so…”

  “Why didn’t you tell me anything about her?”

  “Because I usually don’t tell anyone about my girlfriends. Do you remember me ever telling you about anyone?” He hadn’t shared much about his own relationships either until marrying Joan.

  “Even Rachel didn’t say a word – and you know she has no boundaries sometimes. Are you hiding her?” Eli asked suspiciously.

  “Of course not,” I answered quickly, worried he might have noticed something unusual about Lily.

  “Rachel told me she’s really talented.”

  “Anyone who knows what they’re talking about says she has a bright future. She just got accepted straight into fourth year at Avni.” Before he could respond, I saw Lily and Joan walking toward us.

  “I hear you’re studying art,” Eli said to her.

  “Yes, at Avni.”

  Seeing that their conversation flowed naturally, I relaxed a little and went to the kitchen to speak with my mother.

  “She didn’t eat anything,” my mother pounced.

  “Lily?” I asked with feigned innocence.

  “Yes, Lily. What, my cooking doesn’t taste good to her?” She had plenty of practice in taking offense this way.

  “We were just at her parents’ house, and she had a bite of something there,” I offered a flimsy excuse.

  “Tell her that if she doesn’t eat here, she might as well not come.” My mother’s words were final.

  “Mom, does everything always have to revolve around food?”

  “Not everything, but most things … actually yes, everything. Remember: ‘If there’s no food, there’s no Torah.’”

  I’d heard that line more times than I could count.

  “Isn’t it enough that I eat?” I tried another angle. “I also didn’t see Joan gorging herself on your food, but you’re not complaining about her.”

  “I’m used to Orit by now. But to start out this way – with your mother?”

  My father stood silently washing the dishes. He knew better than to argue; nothing he said could ever steer my mother off her course. He gave me a smile of full understanding. The truth was, he didn’t understand anything yet. Only I knew that I was physically present at that dinner, while my soul wandered elsewhere. I wanted to, but couldn’t bring myself to say out loud the plan I had already sketched in my imagination. Nobody around that dinner table could have guessed what I was planning for the next day – November 22, 1975, exactly one week before the first night of Hanukkah.

  Chapter 25

  If I Forget You, O Jerusalem…

  Sunlight streamed through the slats of the shutters in the bedroom and woke me. It was nine in the morning; at the base, we were up by five, in total darkness. Lily was still asleep. I didn’t want to wake her. I walked into the living room and quietly opened the shutters. The light that flooded the room blinded me. The winter sun hung low in the southeast, the sky was blue from horizon to horizon, not a single cloud above. I smiled to myself because I knew what was going to happen today. Lily had no idea.

  Even though David had delivered the “message” from our friends – their opinion about what I was about to do – he was still the first one I called that morning to tell him: today is the day.

  “You’re the first to know that this isn’t new.”

  “I just want to say you’ve lost your mind. Does she know?” he asked, though he already knew the answer.

  “You know the answer.”

  “So maybe she doesn’t…”

  “No chance,” I cut him off.

  “There’s always a chance.”

  “I know her. She’ll say yes! I even think she’s expecting at least a proposal. So today I’ll propose, and we’ll do it, today. We’ll see how it unfolds. I’m not a fortune teller.”

  “And what about the parents?”

  “Whose?”

  “Yours, hers. Do they know?”

  “Nobody knows except you. And soon Max and Serge.”

  “And Lily?”

  “Shhh … keep your voice down. Sorry, I need to talk quietly – she’ll find out soon.”

  “When?”

  We arranged that he, Max, and Serge would be the witnesses and that they’d pick us up around eleven. He didn’t argue – he knew too well the rock standing before him. When he asked where the wedding would be, I said: wherever we can buy a ring. When he pointed out that people don’t get married on the Sabbath, I reminded him of the rabbinical ruling for emergencies.

  “Good morning.” Just as I hung up the phone, Lily walked into the living room and sat on my lap.

  “Who were you talking to?”

  “David.”

  “Plans?”

  “He, Max, and Serge will be here at eleven. We’ll go out – maybe to Jerusalem.” I racked my brain trying to think where I could find a ring on a Saturday. Suddenly I remembered: in the Old City, shops were open. I was sure I could buy one there. And the legendary restaurant Philadelphia was there too – a perfect backdrop for the day I had in mind.

  “Jerusalem?” she asked. “Aren’t you tired? Why not just stay here?”

  “Because I love that city. And we’ll eat at ‘Philadelphia.’ Do you know it?”

  “I know it, I know it. It’s an amazing restaurant, but there’s no way we’ll get a table.”

  “Be optimistic. You know Max. Trust me, he’ll make it happen.”

  An hour later, we stood in front of Jaffa Gate, surrounded by crowds of every faith, sect, and color.

  “You guys go on ahead. We’ll catch up, or meet here in half an hour,” I told David.

  “Does she know?” he whispered. Lily stood with her back to us, gazing toward the new city.

  “Don’t worry. She soon will.”

  “Good luck.” He gave me a mischievous smile I’ll never forget. I knew he’d play along, and I gave him a thumbs-up.

  “Come on, let’s look for a ring.”

  “A ring? What ring?” She was startled.

  “A wedding ring.” I could have said diamond, silver, or any number of things, but I chose to be direct.

  “This is how you’re proposing to me?”

  “Yes. This is my way. I’m proposing to you.” It wasn’t planned, and the words weren’t perfect, but once spoken, they were out in the world.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes, I’m sure.”

  “Absolutely sure?”

  I nodded. Before I could say more, she threw her arms around me in a hug I’ll never forget.

  “So when’s the wedding?” I hadn’t prepared to answer that one on the spot.

  “Today, Lily. If you agree.” She didn’t ask another question. Her eyes welled with tears.

  “It works for me – better yet, it works for us.”

  “I didn’t plan anything beyond coming to Jerusalem,” I admitted sheepishly.

  “Now we’ll find a place to get married. I know it’s possible.”

  She was well aware of my complicated relationship with my parents and also that hers would have liked advance notice.

  “What about our parents?” she asked.

  “They’ll have no choice but to accept it.” I had no idea where that confidence came from, but I was convinced that in the end, both sets of parents would have to accept the marriage as a fait accompli.

  She was quiet. Maybe she doubted what I was saying, but she decided to cooperate, still digesting the surprise.

  “So, shall we buy a ring?” I asked rhetorically. I knew that an affirmative answer meant that “Operation Wedding” would proceed.

  “Yes,” she replied firmly. “Let’s buy it and get married. By the way, you’re insane.”

  “That’s not news now, is it?” I smiled.

  “Do they know?” she pointed in the direction the other three had taken.

  “Yes, they know.”

  “They didn’t say a word! Not even David!”

  “Max actually did say something, but you either didn’t hear or didn’t understand.”

  Buying the ring turned out to be the easiest part. We walked into the first shop by Jaffa Gate, and within minutes walked out with the ring she had chosen. I think she just wanted the ordeal over with. Back at Jaffa Gate, Max demanded to see it.

  “Before you sanctify her, let me check if it fits. Come on…” he was always impatient. “Show us.”

  “In the restaurant,” I told him firmly.

  Luckily, we didn’t need his tricks to find a table at Philadelphia. The place was packed with Israelis, none of whom had any idea they were about to witness a wedding.

  Before coffee and dessert, I handed the ring to Max to check. I knew that was something you were supposed to do.

  “It looks all right. I approve,” he said solemnly and passed it to David, who passed it to Serge. Each one said, “Approved.”

  I was moved. So was Lily.

  “Good luck,” they said together. David added, “And good health…”

  “Thanks,” I said, and in the same breath slipped the ring onto Lily’s finger. “Behold, you are consecrated to me with this ring, according to the law of Moses and Israel.”

  “Do I need to say anything else?” I asked, as the three of them stood stunned and uncharacteristically quiet.

  “Say something about Jerusalem,” David suggested.

  “Uh … If I forget you… That’s what they say at weddings, right?”

  “At the breaking of the glass, I think,” Max said.

  “Yes, at the breaking of the glass,” David confirmed.

  “If I forget you, O Jerusalem, may my right hand forget its skill. May my tongue cling to the roof of my mouth if I do not remember you,” I recited with ceremonial pathos.

  “Break a glass,” Max urged, handing me a thick one.

  “Are you crazy? The religious guys in the course told me: it’s enough to sanctify with a ring and witnesses. No need to break a glass – or a leg…”

  On the ride back to Tel-Aviv, Lily rested her head on my shoulder, her hand nestled in mine, and fell asleep. I couldn’t even doze off.

  I held her hand and felt the ring – our wedding ring. Only weeks earlier, I had told David, “She’s mine.” Now she truly was. I felt the weight of responsibility settle on me.

  My heart overflowed with emotion. It had all happened so fast. But I knew – I would never regret it. The knowledge that we had to tell our parents, though – that she was now mine, and I hers – cast a shadow over my joy. I couldn’t imagine how they’d react. That’s why I wanted to face them alone. Later, I realized that was the right decision.

  Chapter 26

  The Gospel According to Michael

  Around five in the afternoon, Serge dropped me off at my parents’ house.

  I had parted with my wife – my Lily – earlier outside her parents’ home. We agreed to meet later at the apartment, after I carried out the “mission” which seemed more and more impossible the closer we got to Tel-Aviv.

  All the way from Jerusalem, I imagined how I would tell my parents they could set aside one more worry. That I was already married.

  Eli, my brother, their eldest son, had married two years earlier, and now their younger son was following suit. True, in a rather strange way, and certainly not in a very family-oriented one.

  I went into the building, skipped the elevator, and climbed the stairs to my parents’ apartment slowly, deliberately. With each step, I bought myself a few more seconds to reflect on what exactly I was about to do, and how they might react.

  I rang the bell several times. No answer.

  Maybe they weren’t home? Maybe something had happened? Maybe Max had already interfered, called Rachel, and she’d told my parents I had gotten married – and an ambulance had already taken my mother to nearby City Center Hospital. My imagination was getting ahead of me.

  Couldn’t be!!!

  “Who’s there? Who’s there?” My mother’s voice came from behind the door.

  “It’s me.”

  “Who?”

  “Me.”

  “Who?” The door opened wide. My mother stood in the doorway, trying to brush the sleep from her eyes. Clearly, she hadn’t recognized me yet.

  “Oh, it’s you. Come in, what a surprise.”

  I stepped inside and stood in the entryway.

  “Want to eat something?” she asked, already turning toward the kitchen before even shutting the door.

  “I’ve already eaten.”

  “There’s gefilte fish that you love, and schnitzel, and…”

  “Mom, I’ve eaten, I’m full.”

  “Then compote, I know you love that.”

  “Mom, I want to tell you something.”

  “Maybe some good ice cream, or cheesecake, or poppy seed cake which I baked just for you, I know you love them.” She was laser-focused.

  “Mom, Mom, stop,” I finally gathered the courage. “I got married.”

  “I didn’t hear you. What do you want to eat?”

  “Mom, I don’t want to eat,” I answered loudly and clearly, emphasizing each word.

  “You’re like Eli, you don’t like my food.”

  “Mom, I got married!” I repeated.

  “What are you saying?”

  “I got married.” I said for the third time.

  “Moses, Moses, what is he talking about?” She turned toward the bedroom. Silence.

  “Moses, Moses, Michael’s here, and he’s talking about a wedding, he says he got married. Did you know about this? I don’t understand… Bring me a glass of water. I need to sit down. Where’s a chair?”

  I held her hand and led her to an armchair in the living room.

  My father appeared in the doorway of their bedroom.

  He looked as if he had just woken from a restless nap, sheet creases still marking his bare arms. He went to the bathroom sink to wash his face.

  Silence filled the air.

 

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