Soar high, p.13
Soar High, page 13
Rather than pity, her expression showed only respect. “Then I’ll keep learning from you…and Aric.”
Damned if he could find the right words to say. He just nodded.
“Good enough,” Gabe said in approval. “How about getting you a pistol?”
“No, but thank you.” She smiled at the three women in the room before telling Gabe, “They offered to teach me, but…quite honestly, I don’t think I could shoot someone. Hit them, yes. Shoot, no.”
Gabe glanced at Hawk, who nodded. He’d already gotten that read on her, but it was impressive she knew her limits.
“In that case.” Gabe turned to Frankie and JJ. “When she can move better, work with her on self-defense. Escaping if grabbed. Running.”
“Sweet.” Frankie grinned at her friend. “I’ve been trying to get you to learn since forever. Now you’re stuck.”
JJ laughed. “I have some evil moves that work for women our size. It’ll be fun.”
“Oh, boy.” Kit chewed on her lip, then nodded. “Okay. I don’t like being helpless—I’d appreciate your instruction.”
She wasn’t a fighter, Hawk knew. Didn’t have a predatory bone in her body, but she had an internal strength he respected. She’d push herself to gain the skills needed to protect herself and her son.
Not that she’d need to use those skills. Not while he was around.
Bull gave her a nod. “At the shelter, once you got outside, you pulled it together. You figured out that being on the roof would put you out of reach. You got the women up there and kept the PZs from following. Good job.”
The pink that crept into her cheeks made her face glow.
Hawk’s eyes narrowed. She wasn’t used to hearing she’d done good, was she? He knew how that felt. As a kid, he’d fucking cried the first time the sarge had said, “Good job.”
He’d have to remember to tell her when she did well. It was easier with Aric. Not so much with a woman.
But she needed that reassurance, so he’d get his ass on that job too.
Chapter Twelve
If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month. ~ Theodore Roosevelt
* * *
The night had been as fucked-up as Hawk expected.
He woke in a cold sweat with the day’s battle playing in his head. Shooting in slow motion and seeing the nauseating damage each slug had done. Each replay had been slightly different, and in the last one, he’d been too slow. The PZ in the tree had shot him, and he’d been unable to move as Bull got gunned down. Then the house exploded beneath the women.
Their screaming had kicked him out of the nightmare, thank fuck.
He wiped off the sweat with a washcloth, letting the cold bite ground him, and then slugged down a glass of water to rinse the bitter taste from his mouth.
Once outside, he checked the courtyard. The night was gray and cold. Reassuringly silent. Barefooted, he patrolled the perimeter to reassure himself there were no intruders.
His behavior was a lot like Mako’s sometimes.
He half-grinned. There were worse role models than the honorable first sergeant.
As his gut settled, Hawk pulled on a flannel shirt and socks, fetched his violin, and settled out on his deck.
As he tuned the strings, streamers of fog drifted across the lake like lingering ghosts from his dreams. Beneath the fog was the black, still water.
The lake was his talisman. Infinitely changeable. Birthing life; cruelly taking life. Always beautiful.
Often enough at night, he played to the Lady of the Lake, offering her the sad haunting melodies from his heart. And she would gift him with a few hours of peace.
As she did now.
When his fingers grew too chilled to play, he went back to bed for a few more hours and rose at his usual time.
Dressed in sweats and a T-shirt and ready to run, he was tying his shoes when Aric slipped in the door.
“Hey, kid.”
Still looking sleepy, Aric leaned against his knee, pressing close. Yeah, Hawk wasn’t the only one disturbed by yesterday.
“Hungry?”
A nod of the blond head.
Hawk stroked a hand over silky hair that was softer than puppy fur. “All right.” A banana and milk would tide the boy over until breakfast. “Your mom still asleep?”
Another nod.
Figured. She’d had a fucking shitty time yesterday.
Hadn’t they all. He needed to run it off.
As the kid ate, Hawk walked onto the deck to check the lights in the other three houses. It was Saturday, so Bull and Frankie were probably sleeping in. Same with Caz and JJ. Gabe had planned to go into the station early—and there was a light in his house. Audrey might be up.
In case Kit woke up, Hawk wrote out a note and taped it to his sliding glass door. “Aric’s at Audrey’s.”
Finished, he told Aric, “Let’s go see Audrey.”
Never unwilling to visit—as long as Hawk went along—Aric slid off his booster chair. Onto bare feet. Hell.
Hawk made the “want to ride” gesture, and Aric nodded. After setting the kid on his shoulders, Hawk jogged to Gabe’s house, the first in the line, then tapped on the sliding glass door.
In the kitchen, Audrey waved for him to come in.
“Good morning, you two. What’s up?” She looked confused for a minute then laughed. “Let me guess. You’re dying to go running and want me to watch Aric?”
“Yeah. If it’s okay?”
“I like company.” She smiled at Aric and probably noticed the way the kid’s hands tightened in Hawk’s hair.
Maybe a run wasn’t a good idea. Or he could put the kid on his back and—
Audrey tilted her head. “How about we climb up to the…the…”
“Sniper’s nest?” Hawk guessed.
“Yes, that, and we’ll be able to watch you as you run. Okay, Aric?”
The grip on Hawk’s hair relaxed. “’Kay.”
Setting Aric down, Hawk pointed to the hallway. “Mind if I leave through there?”
“Go ahead.” She took Aric’s hand and led him toward the stairs. “You’re going to like this. You can see everything.”
After Hawk went out the garage’s side door, he took a minute to stretch out. He wasn’t a young pup any longer to be able to bust out running. Injuries and age had taught him the benefits of warming up.
He started off at a slow jog down the dirt and gravel road toward Swan Avenue.
After passing the strip he used for his plane in the off seasons when he couldn’t land on the snow or the water, he stopped and turned to look back at Gabe’s house.
No way to spot motion up in the tiny attic space. That’d been part of the design. The logs and shingles concealed sliding hatches at various locations and heights. Each house had a sniper’s nest that provided an excellent field of fire.
Mako had insisted.
Assuming Audrey and Aric were watching, Hawk held up his hand in a wave, then resumed his run, picking up the pace as he went.
The air was brisk with the damp scent of the lake and green growth. A pile of fur at the side of the road showed a moose calf had ended up being dinner for something—probably a hungry brown bear.
The young of any species was vulnerable.
His speed increased as anger…and determination…roused within him. The Hermitage had two young ones. Nothing—and no one—would harm them.
Or the women either. Especially not Kit.
But she was an adult, and despite what she’d been through, she wouldn’t stay hidden here where it was safe. She’d asked Caz and Gabe what jobs were available in town, ones that wouldn’t require a lot of lifting.
And each day, Aric was less dependent on having his mother or Hawk around. The boy might even join Regan at the summer school program.
It was good that the two were moving on with their lives.
It was good that Kit would soon be recovered enough to move to her own place.
Wasn’t it?
Heavens, but she’d slept hard.
Still yawning, Kit went in search of her boy. He wasn’t in Bull’s house.
Next choice would be over at Hawk’s. She heard Aric’s high giggles even as she climbed the deck steps.
When she knocked on the sliding glass door, Aric ran to let her in—and gave her a happy, little boy hug.
A sticky one. He smelled of maple syrup, and the house held an enticing, almost pastry-like aroma.
Hawk was seated at one of the long kitchen islands eating pancakes. That was what she’d smelled.
Disappointment swept through her that she hadn’t gotten up in time to have some. She kissed the top of Aric’s head. “Morning, honey bear. Morning, Hawk.”
Holding onto her legs, Aric leaned back so he could see her face. “Mama, I went up high. With Audrey. So high. We watched Hawk.”
Wasn’t it wonderful to hear his chatter? “Did you now?” She didn’t remember any climbable trees in the courtyard. Audrey wouldn’t take Aric anywhere unsafe, would she? “Where was this?”
“Up.”
Oh, that was helpful. Kit frowned at Hawk.
“Attic room. I was jogging.”
Kit smiled at Aric. “That sounds amazing.”
Except for the fact that she was creating work for everyone else. She’d just have to make sure she got up earlier. “I’m sorry I slept so late. It won’t happen again.”
Hawk snorted. “You’re allowed.”
“Sometimes I ride Hawk,” Aric said proudly. “In a kid-pack.”
“You run with Aric on your back?” she said slowly. “He’s not exactly light…”
“Lighter than combat gear.”
She had to shake her head at someone whose comparisons measured a child’s weight against battle stuff.
“So…” Hawk took a sip of his coffee, gave her a considering look, then turned to point at the garage door at the end of the hall. “Bad guys are busting in from there. What do you do?”
“What?” Just the question sent ice up her spine. Then the momentary chilling fear turned into annoyance. “Seriously? I haven’t even had coffee yet.”
He snorted and turned toward the garage door to call, “Guys, no shooting till the target gets coffee.”
When he raised an eyebrow at her, she wanted to yell at him. That he wasn’t being fair, that—
Life wasn’t fair.
Well…darn it, anyway.
She crossed the room to join him at the island, and okay, maybe she glared at him. A little.
His lips twitched with his amusement.
With a loud sigh, she put an arm around Aric, hugging him to her so she’d remember what was important. “I’d grab Aric and run out the deck door to whoever is home to warn them.”
“Good try.” He pointed at the coffee as an obvious reward.
She poured herself some and wrinkled her nose at the pitch-black color.
“Sugar.” He pointed to canisters on the counter, then the fridge. “Milk.”
After doctoring the sludge to a better color, she heaved a pleased sigh and started imbibing sweet caffeine. “Why did you call my solution a good try? Instead of perfect.”
“There’re gaps between the houses.”
She frowned. A gap meant someone on the road could see her and Aric. And take a shot. “Oh. Right.” That really wasn’t good. “Okay.”
“If you’re here alone?”
Her hands clenched at the terrifying thought. Having people around was one of her safety blankets. To be here alone and have men come in. What if Nabera…
“Kit.” Hawk’s deep voice yanked her out of her head. He didn’t reach for her—just offered his hand.
She gripped his hand with both of hers. His fingers were strong. Callused. Warm.
Her mind cleared enough she could think, and she still didn’t know what to do.
He glanced at Aric. “Hiding places?”
Aric pointed to the upstairs.
Hawk nodded. “Good doors; good locks.”
She found a breath. “So run and hide and call the cops.”
“And us.” He motioned toward the lake. “After dark, you can hide in the reeds.”
“Unner the deck.” Aric made the hand signal for “go prone”.
Hawk’s lips quirked.
Kit started to smile. Apparently, Aric had hidden under the deck a time or two. “Would it be best to leave the courtyard entirely?”
“Too exposed. Mako was a paranoid bast—” Hawk glanced at Aric and substituted, “man.”
Sitting on the stool next to him, she considered. The small dirt road ran past the semi-circle of houses before ending. On the other side of the road was Hawk’s landing strip. The forested area where they’d played games with the children was back where the road curved near the lake, much closer to Swan Avenue. There were no trees near the outside of the Hermitage. “I never thought about any of this.”
He nodded. “Knowing escape routes might let you…settle.”
“Settle?”
“After combat, soldiers stay on high alert. Preparation helps.” His tone was serious. Deadly. “Evaluate shit everywhere. Like the grocery—where are the exits? Hiding places.”
Her eyes started to tear. “I don’t want to live like that.”
“Woman, you already do.” The blunt statement was like a slap in the face.
Denying the truth was like whining that life wasn’t fair. It did her no good. Captain Nabera was still out there, would kill her if he saw her. And Nabera wasn’t the only predator in the world.
Even if there was no one actively wanting to hurt her, after what she’d lived through, her subconscious probably didn’t believe anywhere was safe. The best she could do would be to convince it that she could handle whatever happened. “Okay. I get it.”
His gaze stayed steady on her as he waited for the rest.
“And you’re right. I’ll work on it. And let you tell me the stuff I missed seeing.”
He gave a low humph of acknowledgement and agreement, then pointed at the oven. “Your pancakes.”
Her day went from sour to sweet. “I get pancakes?” She couldn’t keep from beaming at him.
And his head tilted slightly, his expression changing to one that was very masculine. “Do I get a hug too?”
Her mouth dropped open in surprise. At herself. Because she wasn’t immediately revolted; instead, the thought was intriguing—like another way to step out of the desert of non-touching she’d been in.
Before she lost her courage, she stepped between his knees, leaned forward, and hugged him around the shoulders. The very broad shoulders.
A tingle of interest sizzled up her spine.
He smelled different today. A green kind of clean—cypress and lavender. Maybe the tang of sage. She breathed in, wanting to rub her face against him. Against Hawk.
Her hand curled around his neck, under his hair, and she couldn’t resist running her fingers up through the strands. So thick and soft.
He closed his hands on her hips and pulled her closer.
Hard hands moving her.
At the feeling of being drawn forward, she felt the room turn icy cold, too cold for even air to exist. Her heart raced as she gasped, unable to breathe.
Wrenching away, she staggered back, hands up in a futile defense for when he…
He didn’t move.
He would. Soon enough he would. Nausea twisted her insides, and she choked, black spots in front of her eyes.
“Mama!” The cry pulled her head up.
Hawk had an arm around Aric. “Wait, kid. Grabbing her isn’t smart.”
Because she might not realize it was her son touching her. The knowledge was bitter. And forced her to get control.
Seeing her expression, Hawk let Aric go. “Slow, kid.”
Aric ran over, stopped before slamming into her…and hugged her leg.
Bending, she put her arms around his shoulders. He was shaking almost as hard as she was.
It took a minute, two, an eternity before her breathing returned to normal. Okay, okay. She had this. She was fine.
When she straightened, Hawk wasn’t in the room any longer.
Over at the wooden smoker, Hawk checked the state of the salmon strips there. Because he needed something for his hands to do.
Jesus, he’d sent her right into a fucking panic attack. What the fuck had he been thinking? That she was interested in him?
Not hardly. She tolerated him because of Aric, because her kid needed him. She might even like him in a friendly way. Not because she saw him as a man.
Pretty fucking familiar, wasn’t it?
He rubbed at the ache in his chest. He hadn’t intended to scare her, but hell, it seemed that she saw him as being as terrifying as her rapists.
Most women did.
The knowledge was bitter. Because he…liked her. Liked everything about her, from the haunted brown eyes to the thin, callused hands. The way she adored her kid and the unhappiness she showed when she had to accept charity.
He liked her spirit, her courage…and yeah, he was a guy, so he’d noticed the sweet breasts, the curve of her hips. He wanted her in his bed, under him and over him. If she wanted to sit on his face, he’d be all for it.
Instead, he’d scared her into nearly puking.
Now, every time she looked at him, she’d want to run—be looking for those escape routes she’d just learned.
Way to go, asshole.
A minute later, he heard Aric’s high little voice. Over at his house, they were leaving. Obviously, Kit wasn’t sticking around to eat pancakes.
He pulled in a slow breath, unhappiness settling like an unbalanced load in his gut. The Hermitage was home, his sanctuary, but Kit needed to be here. She didn’t have anywhere else to go while she finished recovering.
She wouldn’t accomplish much healing with him here, scaring her.
Aric was pretty much back to normal. If he had his mom, he’d be fine. Hawk wasn’t his security blanket any longer.
No point in hanging around, was there? He let out an unhappy sigh. Time to go shut up the house and get his ass out of here.
