Courting a christmas wal.., p.1
Courting a Christmas Wallflower, page 1
Courting a Christmas Wallflower
Courting a Christmas Wallflower
WALLFLOWERS AND ROGUES
CHRISTMAS WALLFLOWERS
BOOK TWO
DAWN BROWER
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Courting a Christmas Wallflower Copyright © 2022 by Dawn Brower
Cover art by Victoria Miller
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
For all those that find strength when they need it most. Do not give up. You never know what you might discover in the middle of your journey.
You must be the best judge of your own happiness.
JANE AUSTEN, EMMA
Contents
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Epilogue
Thank You
Excerpt: A Wallflower Under the Mistletoe
Dawn Brower
Prologue
Love Be a Lady’s Charm
Acknowledgments
About Dawn Brower
Also by Dawn Brower
Prologue
Lightening flashed moments before thunder struck and rattled the windows of Evangeline Payne’s bedroom. She shook beneath her blanket. Eva hated storms, but loud ones always made her especially nervous. This storm was no different.
Her mother, Daphne Atwood Payne, Viscountess Norwich had died during a storm like this one. That was four years earlier when Eva was three and ten. It was then when she’d become timid and lost the ability to speak well in polite company. Storms had become her greatest weakness.
Her father had changed after her mother’s death too. He’d become distant and angry. His temper flared at the slightest provocation. Her stammer hadn’t helped when he wanted her attention. She tried to avoid him at all costs. She relished the moments when she was allowed to visit her grandmother, Theodora, the Dowager Countess of Birchwood. At her grandmother’s estate she felt free, but still even there with her three cousins for company she couldn’t shake the stutter that plagued her.
She was going to stay with her grandmother in a week and she couldn’t wait. The storm only made her more anxious. What if it was an omen of sorts? If her father forbade her from going Eva didn’t know what she would do. She had to go. She just had to.
Eva slipped out of bed and made her way to the window. She should face her fear and maybe then she could lose the stutter too. Something had to change or she would never be able to escape her father’s house. She needed to marry, and she prayed for something to help her do that.
Her hand shook as she opened the window. With it wide open wind blew inside and the rain pelted against her skin. She lifted her head and let it pour over her face. The pain that prickled her skin from the drops of water was enough to shock her to reality. This was silly—what was she thinking?. Another flash of lighting and the pound of thunder rattled around her. Eva took a deep breath and then stepped away from the window. Somehow, someway, she would have to shake herself free from the fear coursing through her. She was tired of being afraid.
She stared at the stormy sky and made a promise to herself. This summer when she was at her grandmother’s estate, she would make a change. She would become a woman a man noticed, and she would find a husband. If she couldn’t do that, then she had no real chance of a future. Her father drank too much brandy and he got meaner the more foxed he became. Her home had ceased being a place of safety once her mother had died.
Eva didn’t want to be afraid of her own shadow anymore. It was time to live in the light. She stepped forward and closed the windows. Storms were not going to be her weakness anymore. Instead the tempest would be her strength as she walked into the storm and faced everything it threw her way.
She slipped into bed again and settled beneath her blanket. For the first time in a long time she slept peacefully—fear no longer the curse that held her petrified. As if fate had given her a gift… One she had been waiting for and hadn’t realized it. All she had to do was accept it and her greatest desire would be hers. Finally.
One
Eva stared out the window of the bedchamber she had been assigned at Seabury Castle. The castle was located along the shoreline, far outside of the village of St. Davids in Wales. It seemed almost as if her father had banished her to the ends of the earth, considering the castle’s remote locale. After two failed seasons, her father had sent her to stay with her Aunt Clara, the Countess of Andover, who had found a husband in her first season. So somehow that made her the only person who could possibly help Eva find one herself.
It didn’t matter to her father that Aunt Clara lived in such a remote location or that the chance Eva might meet a prospective husband would be unlikely. Eva believed her father had just wanted to send her away, and her lack of a successful season was an excuse to do so.
Aunt Clara had plenty of advice to give. Unfortunately, none of it was exceptionally useful to Eva. Her stutter made most gentlemen look upon her unfavorably, and no amount of advice Aunt Clara could give would help that particular situation.
Eva opened the blue velvet bag where she’d stored the rose quartz. Her turn had arrived to use it, and she wasn’t certain she wanted to. There were certain ramifications that came with the gift the rose quartz gave that Eva didn’t want to have befall her. Was finding love worth the hardships that may happen as a result? Hadn’t she already endured enough. Why did love have to be difficult, too?
If she used the rose quartz to find love, then another obstacle would be put in her path. There was always a chance she would find love only to lose it. That could mean anything from the one she loved dying, or being separated from her by another means. If the latter were to happen there was always a chance they’d find each other again, but at what cost? None of it sounded like a path she wished to take. In her estimation, the rose quartz was more of a curse than a gift. She should just send it on to her cousin. Eva had no intention of actually using it, and as it was a family heirloom, she didn’t wish to lose it either.
Carefully, Eva placed the rose quartz back inside the velvet bag and pulled the strings to close it tight, then put the bag inside the drawer on her writing desk. It would be safe there. She refused to place the necklace around her neck. Eva was too afraid to invoke the supposed magical properties it contained—and fear had never been a close friend of hers... She wanted freedom from her current circumstances, but at what cost? What would the rose quartz expect of her in return for granting her a chance with her one true love? She had too many questions and no clear answers. Eva hated uncertainty more than anything.
No, she couldn’t do it—even if it meant she would never find love…
She would not risk something happening to the one person meant for her. Fate was fickle, and she would not tempt it to a disastrous end. She’d take her chances with whatever her lot in life turned out to be without the aid of the rose quartz. After a time, she’d send it on to her cousin, the final one of four of them, to allow her a turn. If she waited a short time none of her cousins would question her closely about her use of it. Forwarding it to her cousin too soon would make them all pester her. She had to at least pretend she was interested in the rose quartz for now. Eva had no desire to give her cousins a reason to question her or her motives. They all seemed fine with using the quartz to find love, and if she expressed any disinterest, she feared how they might react. This was what was best for her, and she didn’t want to explain herself to anyone. She hated all kinds of confrontation, no matter how well meaning it could be.
A knock echoed through the chamber, causing Eva to jump. She turned toward the door. Who could be on the other side? She prayed it wasn’t her aunt. Eva had been in residence at the castle for less than a sennight and already her aunt was driving her mad. Another knock. “Miss Payne,” a woman said from the other side of the door. “Lady Andover wishes for you to join her in the blue salon.”
Eva groaned. She was probably preparing more lessons for Eva. So far none of her lessons had made much sense. Truthfully, they were nothing more than her aunt regaling her with tales of her own season and the joys of her youth. Eva had been polite, of course, but she had been battling ennui the entire time. “Please tell her I’ll join her posthaste.” She kept her tone light and happy sounding and somehow managed not to stutter once. Eva did not need the maid to report her lack of enthusiasm to Aunt Clara.
She sighed and then took a deep, fortifying breath. When she faced her aunt, she would need whatever strength she could muster. Satisfied she was duly prepared for the upcoming encounter with her aunt, she smoothed her skirts one last time, then exited her chamber. Eva slowly descended the stairs. Ladies, as her aunt had said often since she’d arrived, did not run or rush to be anywhere. It would be foolish to start the encounter with a lecture on her hurried arrival.
Once she stepped inside the parlor, she waited by the entrance for her aunt to acknowledge her. Aunt Clara had a fair complexion not marred by any time spent outdoor. Her hair was dark, almost as dark as the night sky, but highlighted slightly by some silver streaked throughout. When she turned toward Eva, her blue eyes made her shiver slightly from the coldness of their depths.
“Evangeline,” her aunt greeted her. “Come forward, girl, and sit. I don’t want to look up at you the entire time.”
Eva swallowed the lump in her throat and did as her aunt asked. She sat in the chair directly across from her aunt. When she had first arrived, she had deigned to sit closer and had come to regret that decision. It was far easier for her aunt to reach out and smack her with her cane if she was within reach. “The maid told me you required me to attend to you.” Eva struggled not to stutter. She was afraid of Aunt Clara, but if she couldn’t keep from stumbling over the words, her aunt would find some way to punish her for it. The few days she’d spent in her company had been harsh ones, and forced her to speak very carefully. She never let words spill off her tongue without first thinking about what she should say and then deliberately pronouncing each one.
“Yes,” her aunt agreed. “I did send for you. There are a few things we need to discuss.”
That did not bode well for Eva… “About?” She lifted a brow. Eva probably should refrain from being impertinent, but this was something she had to know.
“Your future, of course,” her aunt clarified. “I see no reason why you have not secured a match yet. You come from a solid family line and you are passably pretty.”
Such kind words her aunt had for her… Eva barely managed to suppress the urge to roll her eyes. Besides, her aunt was right. She did come from an excellent family and her blonde hair and blue eyes were at least more favorable in the eyes of the ton. Those things had never been the issue. She glanced away from her aunt and tried to keep the fear from her voice, but failed. “It..s not my fam…fam…family connections.” Damn it. She’d been doing so well.
“No,” her aunt agreed. The disapproval in her tone was evident as she spoke. “But we can work on your…speech difficulties.”
Eva turned to face her aunt. “I’ve bbbeen trying,” she said. Shame spread through her as she spoke. Why couldn’t she stop stuttering? Her cheeks heated from the frustration with her inability to speak properly.
“Not hard enough,” Aunt Clara said in a firm tone. She narrowed her gaze and studied Eva. She resisted the urge to squirm under the scrutiny. Her aunt settled her hand over her cane and leaned back as if satisfied with some decision she’d made. “We are going to ensure that will no longer be a deterrent for you. Starting with a house party over Christmastide.” A smugness settled over her aunt that troubled Eva.
She forced herself to calm down and articulate her words. Eva had to keep her wits about her to navigate the rest of their conversation, and stuttering would make it all inherently worse. “A house party?” She thought she would be free from social engagements until the start of the season. That had been the only blessing she could see about being sent to the remote area of Wales. “Christmastide is a mere sennight away. Is there time to arrange a proper house party?”
“I have already begun doing so.” Her aunt leaned forward, pressing her cane into the carpet. “Invitations were sent before you arrived. Our first guests will start to arrive tomorrow.” Her lips tilted upward into a self-satisfied smile.
How awful… Why was her aunt just now telling her this? There was no helping any of it of course. This was her life for the foreseeable future. Her aunt had complete control over her. Eva’s father had ensured that when he’d exiled her to the castle. “How many guests will be here?” She had to gain as much information as possible. It would be the only ammunition available to her. She needed as much help as she could to survive the upcoming house party.
“Several gentlemen,” her aunt informed her. “At least three eligible ones. I had to invite some ladies too or it wouldn’t be even numbers in attendance, and well, it would not look right. If I were you, I’d take advantage of the close proximity and lure one of those gentlemen into matrimony.”
Surely her aunt wasn’t suggesting she trap one of them into marriage... That couldn’t be right at all. Aunt Clara was far too prudish to suggest anything so untoward. “I don’t know if that is possible, but I will try to gain the attention of one of them.” Even if that attention wasn’t of the romantic sort. Eva had to at least try to converse with them. Her aunt wouldn’t allow anything less.
“Do more than that.” Her aunt’s tone was firm. “I expect that after Christmastide, I can write your father of your impending nuptials.” Well… It seemed as if her aunt had higher expectations than Eva had believed. Aunt Clara stared at Eva for several moments, unblinking. “Do not let me down, girl.”
What else was she supposed to say to that? She would not trap some unsuspecting gentleman into marriage. Eva wanted more than that with a husband. She hoped to find love, or at the very least, a mutual respect. If she forced a man to marry her, surely he would come to resent her for it. Then what kind of marriage would she have? One where her husband loathed her? No, she refused to sentence herself, and some unsuspecting gentleman, to a lifetime of misery. “I promise to do my best.” She would not promise to do anything she found appalling.
“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Her aunt sighed. “But don’t you worry, girl, I’m here, and I will not allow you to fail.”
And that was what Eva feared after hearing what her aunt had to say... If Eva couldn’t force a marriage to happen, her aunt would. This upcoming house party would be a social disaster. If she didn’t find a husband, she might very well end up ruined at the end of it.
She took a breath to calm herself. “I’m certain that will make my father happy.” Eva didn’t believe her father cared what happened to her as long as he was no longer responsible for her care. She was not a male child and therefore he had little use for her. He’d married not long ago and was doing his best to impregnate his new bride with his heir. Eva was not important, and never had been.
“Of course he will be. That is why he sent you to me, after all.” Aunt Clara lifted her chin. There was a haughtiness in her gaze that was foreboding. “I have also had the maids go through your gowns. Most will be fine for the house party but you did not bring any ballgowns. A seamstress will be here in the morning to take your measurements. You will be dressed appropriately for the Christmas ball. That is when I hope to announce your betrothal.”
Her aunt was overconfident about her chances of securing a match at this house party. What would she do when Eva undoubtedly failed? She wanted to run and hide, but that would not solve her problem. It was time to put her head high and quit being the timid mouse she’d been for years. “All right,” she said in a soft tone. “Is there anything else?” She hoped not…
“No,” Aunt Clara said. “Go rest. It will be the last time you can for a while. Tomorrow is the start of your new future. Prepare yourself, because nothing will ever be the same again.”
She nodded. “Yes, Aunt Clara,” she said, then stood and turned on her heels to leave. She forced herself to walk at a proper pace. If she rushed out of the room it would give her aunt the satisfaction of knowing she’d unnerved her. Aunt Clara had disrupted Eva’s small world in ways her aunt would never understand.
Eva didn’t have to wait until the next day for her life to change. It had the moment she’d been told she would have to stay in Wales over the winter months. Nothing had been the same since her father had decreed his sister would be her tutor and help Eva find a husband. She had known then that her life would be full of constant upheaval, and the fact she’d been right did not make it better.
