As they are, p.17
As They Are, page 17
In real life, I forced myself to be polite, to let all of my partners take the lead, but in my mind, I could take control. She would do as I said, her freckled chest on full display. I’d take a second to let my mouth kiss each one before lining myself up and plunging into her.
“Yes,” she’d moan. “More. Give it all to me.”
I wouldn’t be gentle. She’d take my cock like she was made for it, and I wouldn’t slow down as I barreled toward an orgasm.
“Fuck yes, Henry. Come in me.”
I would look up, seeing Wren looking up at me.
And I came.
“Fuck,” I said the moment I was able to think again. I shouldn’t have done that. Nothing good would come of me thinking about her as I jerked off, because we were only fake dating. There was no future where any of my fantasies were real.
I needed to follow my rules and stay sane.
But as more time went on, that seemed impossible.
When I got out of the shower, I still felt guilty, but I saw I had a text from the very woman on my mind.
Wren
The first episode is coming out tonight. Mollie is having a mini watch party. Want to come and hang out? I’ll have popcorn. Or vegetables, if you wanna be healthy.
And now I felt worse. I wanted to spend time with her, but there was no way I could be the version of Henry she wanted. I was a mess, falling apart at the seams. She didn’t deserve that.
It was a long week, so I need rest. Maybe some other time.
Take as much time as you need. Do you wanna skip filming tomorrow?
No, I can film.
I wasn’t going to let her down that much. No, I was taking the day, and I would be normal by tomorrow.
I had to be.
18
WREN
RWL Superfan Discussion Central
Carly Ware: First episode of the second season drops TONIGHT! What are you most excited for?
Comments:
Jamie McCullough: I need an update on Wren and Jude! They better get back together!
Alicia Parrish: What about that other guy? Do you think he’ll be in it?
Neve Bullock: He’s just an off-season side piece. She better be with her soulmate!
Kerry Winsor: As a resident of Strawberry Springs, I can tell you he’s not a side piece! And he might be in the show . . .
Neve Bullock: NO
Alicia Parrish: Is he cute in real life too?
“I’m so excited!” Mollie said. “We get to watch the new series while the star of the show watches it with us!”
She had ice cream in her hand. Cain followed behind her with popcorn. Eric grabbed a massive handful and Cain sighed when pieces went everywhere.
“How are you feeling?” Mollie asked, sitting next to me.
“Nervous,” I said. “I know they went a new direction with adding Henry, but it feels too good to be true.”
“I get it,” she said. “But they did such a good job on the first season. I bet this one will be even better.”
I hadn’t seen the first season. By the time I wasn’t filming it, I had no desire to see Jude and me flirt.
I’d never considered seeing myself on TV, not even when I was a kid dreaming. I never thought I was the kind of woman for that. Some days, I still didn’t.
Pulling out my phone, I checked it again, hoping Henry had changed his mind. He was a balm on my frayed nerves, and I knew he would know the perfect thing to say to put my worries to bed. I didn’t want to make him feel bad for taking time for himself, because he more than deserved it.
I just foolishly wished he didn’t shut me out from it.
We’d been spending a lot of time together, but I had a feeling that there was something I was missing. Usually, I didn’t think this hard about people I hung out with, but I wanted to know everything about the man who’d helped me. All that was in my mind was the put-together version of him he showed me.
And I wanted more.
The bar had done nothing for my crush, especially when he’d pulled me close during our dance. I’d been serious when I told him I was fine skipping the dance floor, but now I regretted not staying longer. There was something about him that made me unable to look away, even though I should for my own sake. He was good at keeping up boundaries and making sure we didn’t spend too much time together and get confused.
Still, it stung.
“All right, we’re ready.” Mollie turned on the TV and did a little dance before passing the ice cream to Cain. “It’s a shame Henry couldn’t come.”
It was. “Yeah, but he’s literally saving my ass here. He deserves a day off.”
“Is that disappointment I detect?” Mollie asked with an eyebrow raised.
I shrugged as the show started.
The first episode opened with my interview with the camera, in which I talked about how things had changed between Jude and me. The tension was obvious on my face when Jude called us friends, and I was surprised Madison had left that in there.
Then, a drone shot of the library took up the screen, and my voice told the story of how I’d found it.
I left out the part where Henry and I had snuck in, but everything else was true. I felt like it was a forgotten centerpiece of a community. The town was tight-knit but needed a little love. How it had inspired me.
All in all, it was a good beginning. Madison easily could have put me in a bad light after the stunt I pulled.
Then, Jude came on the screen. He told the story of us. How we didn’t work out. And he sounded . . . disappointed?
In all of the time I’d worked with him, he’d never given me the time of day. There was no indication he’d missed me at all.
Was he acting again?
“That’s odd,” I said. “I didn’t know they were gonna go for that angle.”
“They could just be wrapping up loose ends,” Cain said.
“They better be,” Mollie said as she grabbed the ice cream from him.
The episode moved to the tour of the library, then to me kissing Henry. My cheeks grew hot the second I saw us, because that looked . . . real. And my best friend was watching it while she covered Eric’s eyes.
“Look at that hand placement,” she said. “Did you notice that?”
“No,” I hissed. “I was more focused on his other one on my face.”
She whistled.
“Can I see now?” Eric asked.
“I feel like I’m watching something private,” Cain said. “But it’s better than the first season.”
“You didn’t like the first season?” I asked. I wasn’t sure I could handle it if he didn’t, but my curiosity was piqued.
“I loved the work you did,” he said immediately. “But the romance was . . . a little forced.”
“He unfortunately called the fake relationship.” Mollie rolled her eyes. “Rude.”
“It was unnecessary, that’s all. I only cared about the mansion. No offense.”
“None taken,” I replied. It was refreshing to hear someone care about the work. All I’d seen online were people freaking out over Jude and me.
But I’d started this whole thing to show my work to more people. I hated that everything was about a fake relationship and not the beautiful piece of history I was working on.
I focused back on the show. They were showing the first few days of work I’d done, though making it look like Jude and the crew did more than they had. The contractors hired were there during the day, but Jude was a true TV guy and preferred to only do work on camera.
Which meant he didn’t get much done at all.
Seeing it now made me roll my eyes. And it only got worse when they kept showing him watching me. I’d not noticed while we were filming, but there were loads of shots of him glancing over.
“Are they making it seem like he misses you?” Mollie asked.
“He doesn’t,” I said. “He was the one caught with someone else. He started this whole thing.”
But then the camera cut to another scene of Henry and me, and I wondered if what I’d seen was real. They weren’t making either of us look like the enemy, just a happy couple.
When the episode was over, I was tense. Looking at myself through a camera was far more uncomfortable than I expected.
“That was interesting,” Mollie said. “Especially now that I know the whole story.”
“It’s show business,” I muttered. “They want the good ratings.”
“Is that what you want?” she asked.
I frowned, trying to decide. I knew Mollie would want an answer eventually.
But by the time I’d come up with something, she was covering her mouth and running to the bathroom.
I blinked. I’d been the one to get the ice cream and popcorn. “Please tell me Dale doesn’t stock expired stuff,” I said.
“Oh, no. It’s fine.”
“It’s fine?”
“Mollie throws up sometimes,” Eric explained. “Any time I ask, they say they’ll tell me later.”
I frowned. “If Mollie’s sick . . .”
“She’s not,” Cain said.
“Then—” I froze when I realized what was going on. Then I tore after Mollie.
She was hunched over the toilet bowl and didn’t spare me a glance as I hovered in the doorway.
“Cain, don’t be a mother hen. I’m fine. Stay with Eric and Wren.”
“I’m not Cain.”
She let out a groan. “Shit.”
“You’re . . . Are you . . .” I didn’t even know how to ask.
Mollie sat back on her heels. “Yes, I’m pregnant. Not very far along, but enough to make me throw up randomly. If you see a spot in a field, stay away from it.”
I could only stare. I knew they were discussing kids. But she was pregnant? Already?
“Wren?” she asked. “Are you . . . You have nothing to worry about, you know. You’re welcome here, and my due date is way after you go back to Nashville, but even if you stay longer, we still have Cain’s old room we could use.”
I heard her words, but couldn’t say anything. I was in such a state of shock that I didn’t know what to do.
Mollie played with the hem of her shirt. “Please say something,” she begged.
I pulled myself out of my thoughts. I wasn’t sure what I was feeling other than total and complete shock. “I am so happy for you.”
She perked up, her back straightening. “You are?”
“Of course!” I pulled her into a tight hug. “You’re gonna be an amazing mom.”
She was. And I knew it more than anything. Mollie was kind, funny, and selfless. Cain was dedicated and caring. There was no reason I shouldn’t be thrilled.
And I was.
But there was also a deep sadness, one I carried with me everywhere. Mollie hadn’t done this, and all she deserved to see was my happiness. But I couldn’t shake the grief that rocked me to my core.
My future niece or nephew was going to have the greatest mom in the world.
And I’d gotten one of the worst.
19
HENRY
Strawberry Springs Neighborhood Watch
Kerry Winsor: The first episode of Renovating with Love was so good! I kinda feel bad for Jude, though.
Comments:
Jade Clark: He can have the heiress he kissed then. Friendly reminder that Henry is in the group and can see everything you say.
Nicole Rudder: What streaming service is it on? I swear there’s like a million of them.
Mollie Wilson: It’s mainly on live TV right now.
Nicole Rudder: Who has cable anymore???
Henry Connor: Not me. You’ll have to keep me posted on how I’m doing on camera.
Kerry Winsor: You’re not even watching the show you’re in??? I’d never be able to look away from myself.
Hu Gh: Hey, has anyone noticed that the new girl looks kind of like the girl in the show?
Jade Clark: You’re kidding, right? Please tell me you’re kidding.
I felt Wren before I saw her. Instead of giving me my usual wave, she crashed into me the second she saw me. I had to keep what was in my hand pulled away so it wouldn’t get crushed.
“Hey, buttercup.” The pet name slipped out, but I told myself it was because I was wearing the mic. “What’s going on?”
“I just need this,” she said, her face pressed into my shirt.
I stayed still, letting her have whatever time she needed. I looked around and saw Jude watching us, and I hoped for his sake that he hadn’t been the one to do this.
“Okay,” she said, pulling back. “I’m good.”
“Are you sure?”
“Good enough. I can’t really talk about it under the best friend code, so don’t ask too many questions, but I just got a shock. That’s all. What’s in your hand?”
I was content to figure out what had upset her, but she was already trying to peer behind me to see what I was hiding.
“This is a morning glory. They just started blooming.” I delicately put it in her hair. “I thought you might like it.”
“Is there a florist in town that I don’t know about?” she asked. “You always find the best flowers.”
“No florist. I grow them myself.”
I tilted her head to kiss her. I wanted to talk to her all day, but she pulled away and turned. “They told me to keep it short today since we have a load of work to do. At least I can keep you with me.” She gestured to her hair.
“I understand,” I said. “Have fun and don’t work yourself too hard.”
“No promises,” she said before she walked over to Jude to do whatever she had to for the day. After checking my watch, I needed to get to the clinic.
But as I turned, I saw Jude reach out to touch Wren’s shoulder. She moved away, eyes narrowed at him, but the action alone made my fists tighten. As far as I knew, she wanted nothing to do with him.
Why was he trying it now?
I was tempted to stay and make sure he didn’t try anything like that again, but work called.
The sight weighed heavily on my mind until eight, when the door opened, and I was shocked to see Hugh walking in.
Hugh was one of the oldest people in town, and he avoided me like the plague. He didn’t need to, considering all of the things I knew about him.
“Tammy won’t give me any coffee until I come in here,” he grumbled. “Damn woman always getting in my business.”
I crossed my arms. “Does she have a reason to be worried?”
“I stepped on a rusty nail a week ago.”
“Wha—Hugh! You have to come in when things like this happen, especially considering your age. Come to the back right now. We’ll check it out.”
“Can I get coffee first?”
“Will it make you let me do my job without complaining?”
“Maybe.”
I let out a sigh. “Get a cup, but then we’re talking about this rusty nail and why you’re avoiding coming to get treatment.”
It was lunch before I got a breather. Hugh’s unscheduled appointment put me behind for the day and I had to rush through every visit to stay on time.
I was tempted to close the clinic, but as I walked up to the door, I saw one of the PAs running to me.
“The ladder . . .” she panted. “It . . . She fell.”
My heart jumped in my throat. “Who fell?”
“Wren.”
My heart dropped. Wren fell? My Wren?
I tore out of the clinic without another thought. It was rare that I dealt with an emergency, but I was trained for it.
But in this emergency, I couldn’t think of anything else but getting to her.
I loved the people I shared the town with, but I was able to put up a professional wall to do my job when I needed to. This time, my mind was filled with all the things that could have happened, and I’d never moved faster in my life.
I found her on the ground, thankfully in a grassy area. She was slowly sitting up, eyes on her arm that dripped blood.
Most importantly, she was conscious.
“Wren,” I said, skidding to a stop in front of her. She looked up at me, and her eyes seemed clear. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I think so.”
I put my hands on her cheeks to get a closer look at her eyes. They were clear and alert.
The cut on her arm was more than likely going to need stitches, and I trailed my gaze over every inch of her to check that it was the only injury.
“What happened?”
“It was an accident, I swear!” Jude was the first one I heard, and I turned to him, glaring.
“What did you do?” I nearly growled.
“I was just trying to talk to her.”
“Next time, don’t use the ladder I’m using,” she snapped.
I was going to break my Hippocratic oath and murder him.
“I’m fine,” she said. “Luckily, I fell on my ass.”
“I’ll be the judge of that,” I said. “You’re coming with me.”
“What? Now? But I—”
I didn’t give her a chance to argue. I slid one of my arms behind her back and the other under her knees and hoisted her up. She yelped, arms coming to wrap around my neck.
“I’ve got you.”
“I-I can walk. I think. Seriously, I’m fine.”
“Buttercup, I’m gonna lovingly ask you to shut up and let me do my job. Adrenaline is still in your system, and you could easily have injured something.”
Her cheeks went pink, but her mouth closed.
Everyone gave me a wide berth as I took her back to the clinic. After setting her on an exam bench, I immediately locked the door.
“Henry,” she began. “I don’t need—”
“Stitches first. Hold your arm out. Do you know what cut it?”
“A tree branch, more than likely. That was all that broke my fall.”
“Are you up to date on your vaccines?”
“Yeah.”
I nodded. At least there wasn’t a risk of tetanus.
I cleaned everything up before numbing the area and working on the stitches. I listened to every breath of hers to make sure she wasn’t in pain.
