Hidden beneath the ember.., p.21
Hidden Beneath The Embers, page 21
The friction made my clit burn, building my pleasure as I continued to move, pushing my center deeper into him and letting my head drop back. He pulled me down, kissing me hard as his hand grabbed my breast. Letting out a moan, I went to pull away to remove his pants, but I stopped suddenly, as a cold shock ran through me, as if someone submerged my body in ice.
Before I could dissect that feeling, his body seized with his release, making me pause. I felt the fabric of his slacks dampen as his eyes came back to focus on me, his feelings of pleasure quickly fading as he realized what had just happened.
Alastair’s embarrassment poured out, making the air shift around us, feeling tainted as it washed over me and the moment we were sharing. I pulled my body off him and laid next to him with my eyes gazing up at the dome above us, wondering what to do or say. He knew what lay within his slacks as his hand brushed over the fabric to fix himself.
He swallowed, clearing his throat. “I’m sorry, Davyna…I…I—”
“It’s fine,” I said, trying to reassure him as we sat in silence for a minute, both not really knowing what to do next.
“Let me go change. I’ll be right back.” He moved quickly to his bathroom, closing the door gently, but I could feel his anger and embarrassment through the door, only growing with more intensity. I grabbed my dress, put it on, and moved my body to the edge of the bed, where I watched the flames flicker off one another. It was probably for the best. Everything was moving so fast, and after tonight, I just needed everything to stop spinning.
The door opened, and Alastair wore his pajama bottoms resting low on his hips as he came out, giving me a half smile, that I tried my best to return. “Did you want to stay here tonight?”
I knew the next words to come out of my mouth would make him upset, but I just needed some space. “I’m going to go to my chambers and just sleep this day off.”
“Of course. Would you like me to walk you there?”
“No, it’s fine. I’ll see you in the morning.” I moved over to him, taking his face with both my hands, and gave him a deep and final kiss for the night, hoping it would relay that what just happened was not the reason I was leaving. I pulled away, taking in those eyes slowly opening, seeing a genuine smile grow on his face. “Goodnight, Alastair.”
“Goodnight, Davyna.” Walking out of the room, I closed the door behind me and felt a cold chill pass through me again. What was that? My magic? Something else?
I crossed my arms over my chest, feeling my eyes pull towards the library at the end of the hall. I looked the other way, seeing the empty estate, and decided to go there before heading to my room.
As I walked in, the candles flickered to life, illuminating the space as I stopped in the center of the room. I desperately wanted to know what life could be like, keeping this side of me, keeping my magic, because going back to a life without it felt like a mistake now.
I wanted to find anything that proved the Fae helping me were wrong about what was best, because everything I felt—as scary as it was at times—felt right. And I couldn’t shake this feeling deep within saying not to do this spell. I looked over all the books and silently prayed to the gods to show me a way to keep this part of me—that the answer was somewhere in this library.
But nothing came to me, and my magic didn’t cry out. Dropping my head in defeat, I guess I already knew there was no other way—no other answers to give me than this.
I can’t keep it.
The fire that burned through me woke a whole other person, and I couldn’t help but feel there was so much to learn from her. To see her thrive, to grow into something more. Alastair was right, though: what was happening here wasn’t my battle, and I was only a target. Going back and forth on my feelings only caused me more pain. A tear streamed down my cheek as I glanced up at the crystal dome, blinking quickly as I saw something pass by, but it must have been my own imagination.
I stopped trying to call anything to me and didn’t touch any books, because there wasn’t anything else I could do now. Walking back out of the library, I pulled the door closed and made my way past Alastair’s room, still feeling his anger mix with other emotions, seeping through the wood.
I made my way up the stairs and down the hall to my chambers, closing the door softly, before I made my way over to the bed, not bothering to change. Looking out the window, I prayed to whomever was listening to let me have a dreamless night. But I don’t think the gods themselves would grant me that mercy. So, I drifted off into the darkness, letting it take me where my fate awaited.
The force of the wind began to grow, making the trees sway back and forth, moving the ashes in a circle around me. I was on the ground, confused as I stood and saw the blackness that consumed me on more nights than I could count, growing in size. It began pulling me again, but unlike the other times I've come here, I didn’t try to fight it. The cold broke through me as if it was taunting me to break, but I didn’t cry out...
“NO! STOP!”
I turned, looking for the voice in shock, but I still felt numb. The only thing I could ever hear in this place were my screams. But that voice…
“LET HER GO!”
I saw no one, and for a moment, I wanted to call out to them...but what was the point? This darkness would always win.
I picked up my foot and moved willingly into the void as it started closing around me like a book that would never be opened again. I turned to watch everything close in, feeling tears roll off my face into the abyss as the trees disappeared from my view… And the entrance to this nightmare gave me the only answer that I think I needed to know. That I was going to be forever lost and forgotten.
Just finish it, please.
That voice called out again, grabbing my attention and making a spark within ignite. “STOP!”
I tried to pull out when I saw a figure approaching, but I couldn’t move my feet from the tar holding me in place. Something inside began to build, pushing away the numbness I felt, making me realize... I gave up. I gave in. No! I didn’t want this. Fight! Fucking fight!
I pushed against the tar holding me in place, clinging to that voice as it called my name, weakening the void’s power. Pulling myself to the small opening, I reached my hand out into the world, and found my voice again.
“Don’t let it take me…please!”
I heard the voice yell: “Fight it, Davyna!” And I did, pushing harder to break the chains that the abyss was encasing me in. My head dropped, pushing one more time, and the person grabbed my hand, sending sparks shooting through me like I’ve never felt before, illuminating the darkness into pure, white light.
I quickly sat myself up, panting as I realized what just happened. Someone was with me in there, helping me. Looking down at my hand, I brought it up, still feeling their hand in mine, like a lingering weight.
An ounce of hope began to rise in me, and for the first time, I didn’t feel afraid after this nightmare. Because whoever they were, they made me feel safe, strong, and alive. Their voice had been muffled, but I felt like I’d heard it before.
Who was that?
I ran around the estate three times, trying to get what happened in my room out of my head.
Pushing my body to go around a fourth time, I felt the strain on my magic from Lunavas, making my breath come shorter as my lungs burned with each breath. Every muscle gave a plea to stop, but I couldn’t. I needed to let this anger out, because if I didn’t, I knew what would happen.
My mind flashed to the image of how she had climbed on me, grinding against me repeatedly. Shit! It wasn’t supposed to go like that... My mind rolled through the night’s events, like how fast she pulled the dagger, and where it even came from. But what crossed over her face and in her eyes, was as if the fires consumed her silver irises, burning with such fury. It was dark, just like the Embers.
It worried me that she could fall into that darkness, allowing it to consume her if we didn’t contain it first. I saw her anger at the ball, and what it unleashed. It was deadly and smeared with wrath that I, myself, feared. Or even the fires that consumed her family home. She hadn’t done anything like that here—just the complete opposite in my presence.
And then, it hit me, pulling the air out of my lungs, making me believe I didn’t deserve another breath.
Her magic always came out like that around…him.
Kadeyan and Davyna shared something. It was dark, and it glowed in each other’s presence. I could see it at Lunavas, when she looked at him. And something in the way Kadeyan acted around her… I recognized it from the ball and the clearing the other day. It was something strong, almost a possessive essence coming off of him. Acid burn in the back of my throat, bringing up a bitter taste and I tried to swallow it back down.
Looking around to make sure I was alone, I allowed myself to shift to push this anger out more. My growl echoed as I switched to all fours, feeling my claws rip into the ground, throwing the grass behind me. Another growl escaped my lips, piercing the sky, making me push faster, forming tunnel vision as I picked up speed.
A figure stepped into my direct path, and I snapped out of my trance to shift back on a dime, stopping a few inches from her face. My anger was still evident in my expression as I began pacing. “What do you want?”
“Is that anyway to treat me after the time we’ve spent together?” Jinx asked, her sharp eyes glowing in the moon’s rays. That perfectly straight black hair flowed over her shoulders, falling just below her nipples as I took in the sheer ebony lace gown she wore to the event.
My mind felt like it was transported back to a few months ago, before all this, before Davyna. I had been in the Crystal Court for a meeting, and I saw her from the study as she passed by, only to find her in my bed when I retired. And I hadn’t protested.
Jinx and I had known each other for a long time. She was a powerful and talented witch, and I trusted her. We both bonded over the loss of family, and found comfort in each other from time to time, but it was never a serious matter, until that day. We didn’t have a mating bond, so both of us decided it wasn’t something to pursue past that one time. And then, Davyna came into my life, and everything changed. I wasn’t able to stop thinking about this possible bond Davyna and I shared since the night I brought her here.
“Can you keep your voice down?” I looked back to the estate.
“She doesn’t know how to listen in. If her Fae abilities are even in there, they are suppressed, along with whatever else is hidden.” She rolled her eyes as I looked back at her. “I need to know you will make good on your promise.”
Jinx’s little sister, Nyx, was taken into custody by the Queen years ago. She was forced to serve as a spellcaster for the realm and to search for the Ember stone. We all knew the sentence of that position. The King before her would bring Fae witches in, and if you didn’t find what you were tasked with, you were turned to ash, and new recruits were brought in to replace you. Now, the Queen did the same, and Nyx was running short on time.
“Did you find the stone?” she asked, moving closer. “I am only helping you with this girl if you make good on your word.”
“I have it…and will bring it to Nyx after the spell is successful.” She studied me as she walked in a circle around my body. Suddenly, I felt a spell flowing through my veins. “You don’t need to do a fucking truth spell on me.” She stopped in front of me and gave me a wicked smile.
“No, I know that…but I am.” She pushed the spell deeper, making it impossible to fight her power as it crawled through my veins, causing them to burn. “Do you have it?”
I gritted my teeth from the force of fighting the cracking pain within. “Yes, I fucking have it.”
“Where did you get it?” she asked with a demanding tone, as her power sent me to my knees. I fought the spell as torment flowed through every fiber of my being, trying to keep the secrets in. But no matter what I did, I couldn’t lie under its hold. My eyes shifted to the estate, and her gaze followed.
“Oh my…” She let go and laughed. “Looks like you are keeping secrets from your new flame.”
“Don’t say anything, Jinx, or I’ll destroy it. I fucking will.”
Her eyes narrowed as curiosity crossed her features. “How did some half-human have it?”
“That’s what I'm working on finding out. I’m sure the Fallen Court is behind this.”
Jinx let go of her hold on me and glanced up at the moon beginning to set. “Then, we are good to go. I’ll see you tomorrow night for the spell. I will call on the gods and siphon what I can from the full moon to magnify our power. Enjoy the rest of your…run.” She let her purple essence swirl around her body until she vanished, and my eyes went back to the window, taking a deep breath.
Davyna didn’t need to know everything, only that I would make everything right.
Alastair and I sat in the dining hall eating breakfast when Nova, Marta, and Jinx made their way in. Nova set down a stack of books on to the table, looking towards me and gave me a sweet smile, before shifting her gaze to Alastair. “We found the rest of the spells needed. We can do it tonight, but we need to pull on the full moon for more energy.”
Jinx gestured to the ceiling. “Where do we want to do it? We will need the day to set wards and spells protecting the circle.”
Alastair wiped his face on his cloth napkin and leaned over to kiss me on the cheek. “I’ll be back in a little bit.” He moved his chair out, gesturing for Jinx to follow him. Nova turned, following right behind them, but Marta stayed.
She walked over, her heels echoing off the white marble floor. “I was thinking about you and figured maybe you’d like to have a distraction today.” Moving closer, she stretched her arm out as her power swirled around her hand, making a brown leather pouch appear. I took it and undid the top, seeing the thread and needles within.
“How long has it been since you created whatever you wanted?” she asked.
“I couldn’t even tell you at this point.” I smiled, looking back at the various colors of thread as my fingers grazed over them. “Thank you, Marta.”
“Then come with me.” I took one last bite of my food as I pushed the chair back to follow her.
We went through the estate, climbing the stairs and going down the opposite side of where I’d been staying. We reached a room at the end of the hall, but before she opened the door, I sensed anxiety rise…from her.
“Are you nervous?” I asked as her fingers wrapped around the doorknob.
“About what?”
“This spell. It just seems like a lot,” I mentioned, letting my eyes drop the floor.
“No. Between the three of us, you are in good hands, Dy. How about you? How do you feel about all of this?” She opened the door, moving into the room, causing me to follow her. I collected my thoughts for a moment as I moved forward, but just as I went to speak, I felt all words escape me as I took in the room before me. Fabrics of all colors lined the wall, with tools laying on the table in the center of the room with a sewing machine.
“Dy?” she asked, pulling my gaze back to her.
I dropped the smile that had formed, thinking about her question again.
“I don’t know if I want to do this. I have felt more myself since my magic came alive than I cared to admit. I was just starting to understand what it meant to have this light running through my very being. And the thought of closing that door forever…scares me…” Marta’s head fell low, but I continued. “All my life, something felt like it was missing. Then we lost Elias. I searched for my father, as he told me to, and it led me here. I just don’t believe he would have sent me on this path if I was meant to take it all away. I think he wanted me to wake it up.”
I spent most of the night tossing and turning with this thought, and I couldn’t shake it. Elias had to have known about the Fae, about my connection to this Realm, especially if he knew my father. Unless that detail wasn’t truly known. How easy it would be if I could just ask him, to get the whole truth instead of feeling these emotions pulling me back and forth. Moving over to the fabric, I grazed the surface of a few rolls, taking in the texture of the silk, cotton, and satin materials.
“After I got here and learned about the Embers…I was scared of their history and dark magic, thinking it was possibly within me. But I’m telling you, it doesn’t feel that way. And to know they are all gone…” My mind was spinning, and thoughts of people I didn’t even know came to the forefront of my mind. The grief for my people took over, breaking my heart in two as I winced. “The Queen did that. And after seeing her at Lunavas… I don’t understand how anyone could follow her.”
“Queen Persephone is very good at making people love her, then ripping their hearts out. I would know.” Marta moved over to me, her hand traveling up to pull at a shimmery purple fabric as I watched her knuckles turn white.
“You know her?”
“Yes…we were close once. Before all this.”
I looked over at Marta, feeling a sense of panic rise in her, but it was also tainted with grief, and it made me think of what she told me about the other day.
“Was she responsible for your sister’s death?”
Marta looked at me, and I saw her powder blue eyes gleaming with tears. I took that as my answer.
Allowing her a minute, I moved over to the sewing table, overlooking the machine. It was all black with gold swirls detailed throughout. And yet, I couldn’t shake this cool sensation deep in my spine, keeping me from enjoying the possibilities around me to create something beautiful. “I'm afraid, Marta.”
“Of what?” Her voice was soft as I turned to her, seeing her wipe her eyes. “This is only to protect you.”
“I'm afraid I’ll miss it. The feeling of this power…and this world.”
She moved her hand over mine. “You will, but it doesn’t mean you’ll lose us. You have people who care for you deeply." Her powder blue eyes softened. “You have been the one caring for others for so long now. Stop fighting…and let us fight for you. Let us protect you in this cruel world that would see you dead.”
