She threw her hands up again. “Oh, my gosh! That’s not even important! What is going on with you? And why, why—” She choked. “Why haven’t you told me?”

  A tear rolled down Lindsey’s face, and I thought I was going to be sick.

  I rushed to her side. “Lindsey, I’m sorry, I’m just… I’m—”

  “Tell me.” Lindsey sank down onto the sofa. “Just tell me what’s going on. Start with whatever happened in Charlotte.”

  And so, I told her everything.

  “You’ve all sacrificed so much for me to be this big country star.” I grabbed a tissue. “But I’m unhappy. I’m just so unhappy.”

  “And you didn’t think you could tell us?”

  “When I’ve taken away all your dreams so I could have mine?”

  Lindsey shook her head. “Taken away all my dreams? What are you even talking about? I’m a little insulted that you think you’re the only one going after what you want… and a little hurt. We’re as close as we are, yet the most important thing that has happened to you in years you’ve kept to yourself.”

  “You’re… not mad?” I shook my head. “You’re not mad at me?”

  “I’m mad that you didn’t tell me! This is your life, Gia, and no one wants you doing something you don’t want to do. I’m sure of it. We were behind you because it was your dream. It took about seventeen seconds for me to see the life you were living and know that it was nothing I would ever want.”

  “Really? Even though you’re a great singer, too?”

  “Really, and for all the reasons you don’t want to do it anymore. To never feel at home. To never feel rooted. To constantly be going. For not having a moment of privacy. For always having to be on. That’s for someone, but that is not for me. I’m a homebody at heart.”

  “I think I might be, too.”

  “You just might be.”

  We sat on the sofa in silence for a moment before Lindsey said, “What are you going to do about your team? Sabine is going to die.” She bit the corner of her fingernail. “So is Bob. You know how much he loves ordering his roadies around.”

  “Ugh. It’s so hard!” I grabbed a pillow and put it over my face. After a couple of seconds, Lindsey knocked it away.

  “So, what are you thinking?”

  I breathed in and let it out slowly. “I think I need to talk to my accountant. I’ll stay through any live events that are already booked, of course, and then I’ll do what I can to help out the road crew,” I glanced at Lindsey, “especially Bob. But I’m going to look into buying out or renegotiating my contract with Sabine. I think we have a year beyond my tour dates.” I rubbed my temples. “I’ll still need a manager, just not as much as I need her now, and probably… differently, too.”

  Lindsey placed her hand on my leg, and I reached down and took it in mine. “Will you help me tell Mom and Dad and Paul?”

  “Of course, you big dork. And you won’t even need help.”

  “You don’t think they’ll be crushed?”

  Lindsey raised an eyebrow. “Feeling a bit big in the britches, are you?”

  I pushed her shoulder. “Linds!”

  “Crushed isn’t the right word. They’ll be shocked because it’s shocking. I’m shocked. We think of you as a singer. That’s what you are. And you’re so good at it! It’s going to take a minute, is all. But that’s all. This is your life. Everyone will get that, and whatever you want to do next, we’ll support it. Just like we all support Paul. Just like you all support me.”

  I rubbed my chest. “It’s hard for me to think of it like that. It feels like everyone had to give up so much for me. I feel like I’m letting you all down.”

  “Maybe we did give things up, but we made the decisions we needed to make at the time. And we’d feel a lot worse if, in ten years, we found out you were miserable doing something out of misplaced guilt. That’s just—yuck.”

  I laughed. “When did you get so smart?”

  Lindsey shrugged. “I’ve always been smart, but it helped to have an older sister chasing her dreams to show me the way. Not just the way I wanted to do things, but why I wanted to do them, and the impact they’d have on me, too. You showed me that.” Lindsey leaned into my shoulder. “So thanks.”

  I leaned back. “You’re welcome.”

  Lindsey was quiet for a moment. “I think there’s something else we need to talk about, too, don’t you?” She canted her head to the side.

  I let out a big sigh. “Ugh. Do we have to talk about all the big things tonight?”

  She spread out her hands. “I’m here.”

  I rubbed my forehead and took in a big breath. “Fine. Jackson’s not a fake boyfriend. I mean he is, but I don’t want him to be.”

  Lindsey’s eyebrows shot up to her hairline.

  “I think I might be in love with him.” I collapsed back into the cushions.

  Lindsey turned her body fully toward me and pulled her leg up onto the sofa. “I think that’s amazing, Gia. Because I really like him, too. But, um… I was talking about the trust fund you set up for Paul and me.”

  I flew to my feet, my hands on my hips. “What? How do you know about that? You’re not supposed to find out until you’re thirty!”

  Lindsey lifted her shoulders. “Your lawyer sent the info to Mom and Dad. It was on Mom’s desk when I was there the other week. I wasn’t snooping or anything, I went in there to get a pad of paper and it was just sitting there.”

  I narrowed my eyes. “Just like you weren’t snooping tonight?”

  “Oh no, I fully claim that—I was totally snooping. I thought it was going to lead to me teasing you about kisses, not finding out all your deepest secrets.” She tilted her head to the side. “That is all the secrets, right?”

  I nodded vigorously. “All of them. Every last one.”

  Lindsey pulled me back onto the sofa. “Okay, so more about Jackson. I like him, Gia, I really do. Since the beginning.”

  I bit my lip. “Me, too. He’s just been so easy, from the very beginning. Easy to talk to, easy to get along with. He was a fan, but he let me be me.” I took in a big breath. “He wasn’t intimidated, he didn’t act like I was someone famous, he just acted like I was… someone. Just me. Just Gia.”

  “That sounds so good. I’m so happy for you.” Lindsey reached for her water. “But how would it even work, with you in Nashville and him here?”

  I closed my eyes for a moment. “I’ve barely thought about that. There’s so much potential change going on for me in the near future. But you know…” I glanced down at my lap, then back at Lindsey. “Him letting me just be… well, me, helped me decide to have Alice sing my songs. And I think it’s the right thing for me.”

  Lindsey clapped her hands. “Okay, then. It sounds good. It’s going to take a minute, but I’ll get there. We all will. I think that’s enough big talk for tonight. Why don’t we get to bed so we can do it all again tomorrow. I’ve got to leave here by five.”

  I hugged Lindsey like the best sister she was, and then she went to clean up and get ready for bed.

  It took everything in me not to text Jacskon, but it was late, and for everything that had developed between us over the past month, we hadn’t turned into texters.

  Just what, exactly, was it, we had turned into?

  I bit my lip.

  I’d have to figure that out. And fast.

  Chapter 35

  - Jackson

  “Hey, y’all,” I said, jumping out of my truck. Gia and Lindsey were walking down the steps. It was after lunch, and I’d stopped at Gia's to pick them up. I hadn’t joined them earlier because I had some things I wanted to take care of. Gia was in her cutoffs and boots—one of my favorite looks on her, but did that woman ever not look good?—and Lindsey was in jeans and boots.

  “Hey, Jackson,” Lindsey said. “I just wanted to come out and say goodbye. I’ve gotta hit the road in a couple of hours, and even though I’d love to see your flower farm, I’m being selfish. Because the truth is, I’d love to go on a horseback ride more.” She gave me a big grin.

  “No problem. You can see the flower farm any time.” As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I realized how unlikely it was that Lindsey would be back here. That Gia would be back here. I shook my head to clear my thoughts. I wasn’t going to think about it today, not when everything was going so right.

  “I might just take you up on that someday,” Lindsey said. “Especially if this ride goes as well as it could. Let me get your number.”

  She handed me her phone and I added my number. “You’re the best, Jackson.”

  “The very best,” Gia said.

  “Like, superior?” I added.

  “How about, top-notch?” Lindsey tilted her head.

  “I’ve got it!” Gia said. “Superb.”

  I laughed. “I’ll take superb.”

  Lindsey gave me a quick hug, and then right before she let me go, she whispered, “Good luck! I hope you can do it!” And she stepped away. Before I had a second to figure out what that was about, she was hugging Gia and not letting her go.

  Believe me, I understood the sentiment.

  After more hugs and some tears, the two broke apart.

  “I don’t have to go to the farm right now, you know. We could come riding with you,” Gia said.

  “We can. Y’all rode my horses the other day. We could all go.”

  Lindsey waved her hand. “Nah. It’s only cutting our visit short by two hours, and besides,” Lindsey fluttered her eyelashes, “I have a gentlemen caller joining me.”

  Gia’s eyes popped wide. “What?” She smacked her sister’s shoulder. “Who is it? Why am I just hearing about this?”

  Lindsey laughed and turned away, running up the steps. “That’s for me to know and for you to find out! Bye, you guys. Have fun!” She gave a big wave and bolted into the cabin, closing the door behind her.

  Gia swung toward me, her hands on her hips. “What on earth? Who could it be?”

  I pulled my head back. “I have no idea.”

  Gia linked her arm in mine. “Well, there’s you, but you’re mine, so…”

  I reveled in her words. What if I was hers?

  Gia gave my arm a smack. “I bet it’s one of the Idaho cowboys!”

  I opened up the truck door and she slid inside. Before I closed the door, she said, “Or maybe someone from the bar? We’re going to have to go over everyone we met.”

  “Aye, aye, captain.”

  Gia grinned and I closed her door, trying not to think about how little time we had left.

  I jumped in the truck and we pulled out.

  “It’s kind of crazy that I haven’t been out to your flower farm, yet.” She glanced over at me. “You moved your whole life here for it. It’s important.”

  That was mostly right. “I moved here to not be in New York. I moved here to be with my grandparents, but I always loved working on the farm, so then it became home. I got lucky.”

  “You did.”

  “Did I tell you what my grams used to say to me when I was acting like the moody, bratty teenager I was?”

  Gia laughed. “You were moody and bratty? I can’t imagine! You’re always so calm and together.”

  I chuckled. “I was definitely moody and bratty, but less so once I moved here after college.”

  “Oh, right. That was thoughtless of me.” Gia reached out and placed her hand over mine on the seat. “Teenage years are tough, no matter what, but to not want to be at home…”

  “Another way to say that is to not be wanted at home.” Shoot. Why did I have to say it like that?

  I pulled into the farm, and Gia took off her seatbelt and slid over next to me, holding my hand in her lap. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I can’t even imagine.”

  I chuckled. “I bet you can’t. Your family is amazing.” I tugged her hand. “Come on. That was a long time ago. Let me show you the farm.”

  I slid out of the truck and got Gia’s door, and she immediately took my hand in hers, and it was perfect.

  We walked around and past the garage, when Gia stopped walking. She motioned to the side. “I love what you’ve done with this old truck and the flower landscaping around it.” She took a couple of steps away and looked out to the road and back to the truck. “But nobody can even see it. Why do you have it back here?”

  I placed my hand on the rusted round hood. “This is the truck I used to ride around the fields in with my gramps. It was old even then. He called her Bessie, and he was always talking to her, and it worked. This thing lasted forever, until it didn’t. And this is where it ended up.” I ran my hand over the front grill. “I couldn’t get rid of it.”

  Gia stood up on her toes and kissed my cheek. “I love it. And I think that’s an incredible way to honor your gramps.”

  She slid her arm around my waist and as we walked out to the fields, I thought about how lucky I was.

  “The lilies are done, but the amaryllis should be blossoming soon. They’re a good grower and dramatic, too, so we get a lot of calls for them.”

  We walked into the first field and pointed out the different varieties and the different ways they needed to be cared for. And when we moved on to the second field, Gia said, “Hey wait. You never told me what your grams said when you were being moody.”

  I smiled. “She’d say, ‘Jacks! I don’t know what your problem is, but you need to grab a shovel, and you need to go dig something up. I don’t care what it is, and I don’t care how long it takes, but don’t come back until your hands are sore, your muscles ache, and your head is clear.’ And it worked. Every time.”

  Gia gazed at me, a small smile on her lips. “She sounds great. She called you Jacks?”

  “Yep. She and Gramps started calling me that when I was around eight—right about the time we decided on Grams and Gramps for them.”

  “That’s sweet. I like it. It totally fits you.”

  “Eventually, she came up with a shortcut for when I was being a pain in the butt. It turned into, ‘Jacks, grab a shovel.’ And I would say ‘Yes, ma’am.’ And I’d walk out the door. Gramps was usually standing there giving me a look, so that motivated me, too.”

  “They sound wonderful.”

  I nodded and tried not to think about how much I missed them, or how much Gia had helped me not miss them as much. And soon I’d have to contend with missing her, too. I clenched my fists at my side and tried to shake off the feeling.

  I glanced up at the sky as we walked over to the blossoming shrubs and bushes, and thunder sounded in the distance. “Clouds are rolling in. We could get an afternoon downpour. Maybe we should head back?”

  Gia glanced up. “I know there are a couple more fields. Just show me this bit, and we’ll go back.”

  There was one field in particular I wanted her to see, but it could wait.

  “We’ve got everything in this field from camellias and gardenias to different types of jasmine. Hollyhocks over there—those were my gramps’s favorites. Also, peonies, hydrangeas, and lilacs, though we can’t count on the lilacs, no matter how hard I try.”

  “You just listed all my favorites! But peonies are the best.” Gia kneeled next to the bushes to get a closer look, even though the peonies were past. “And lilacs and irises are a close second—they smell so good I just want to eat them. Lilacs were my grandmother’s favorite, too.”

  I smiled. “My grandmother’s, too, which is why I will never stop trying to grow them.”

  “Why won’t they grow?” She stood and brushed off her pants.

  “Summers are too hot and humid, and winters don’t get cold enough. But sometimes I get lucky.”

  I stepped closer to Gia. One of my favorite people in one of my favorite places? I was definitely lucky.

  “You have a little dirt…” I moved my thumb next to her mouth and gently rubbed at the corner. I rubbed again, and Gia’s hand came up to cover mine.

  And then I leaned in to kiss her.

  My mouth was on hers, and Gia’s hands went to my shoulders, gripping tightly. The thunder unfurled overhead, sounding closer.

  I deepened the kiss, my hands running down the smooth skin of her arms, when the sky split open. Rain poured down on the two of us. We both looked up, my hands still cradling her face, and we grinned. I leaned in and kissed her again, playfully nipping at her lower lip.

  “Come on, let’s get back to the house.”

  Holding hands, we ran, laughing while we stomped in the puddles that popped up. The rain hitting the dirt was one of my favorite smells of living in the country, and the green of the landscape would shine when the storm moved past.

  We stopped on the porch and shook off.

  “Well, if you didn’t get the dirt off my face,” Gia laughed, “the rain definitely washed it clean.”

  “I have a confession…” I pulled off my hat and shook it. “There wasn’t any dirt on your face, and there wasn’t any whipped cream on your face in Charlotte, either. It was just an excuse.”

  Gia’s eyes glittered. “Pretty sneaky, Mr. Reed. I might have to try that sometime.”

  I pulled her close again. “You don’t need an excuse.” And I gave her a quick kiss while the rain continued to fall.

  “I’ve got something else to tell you, too…” She wiped a raindrop off my cheek, and I continued in a whisper, “After that kiss in Charlotte, I walked into my room, pulled the covers back, and jumped onto the bed to grab the chocolates for you.”

  Gia’s hand came back up to my cheek. “That was really sweet of you.”

  “Yeah, well, I didn’t count on the satin sheets, and as soon as I hit the bed, I went flying, feet overhead, and landed in a heap on the floor. And then the carafe fell off the nightstand, and I got totally drenched.”

  She burst into a fit of giggles and covered her mouth. “I hope it was worth it. Those chocolates were worth it to me.”

  I grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckles. “Definitely. Come on. Let’s get in the house and get dried off.”

  I pulled her inside, the both of us laughing, and then stopped in my tracks.

  My grandmother’s roll-top desk was open.

  Gia whipped her head toward me, her eyes huge.

 

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