Sigils and spells, p.68
Sigils & Spells, page 68
Diana pushed me back onto the bed and in my weakened state I didn't have enough strength in me to get past her. “Annarah. The flood was intense. If she got caught up in it, which she must have or we would have found her during the initial search, there is no way she survived.”
“How do you know that? I did. Barely, but I did. She must be out there somewhere, scared and probably hurt. We have to find her.” Tears coursed down my cheeks at the thought of her laying out there scared, alone and in pain.
“My child, please. We searched everywhere. The entire length of the river bank from the waterfall down. She was nowhere to be found.”
“Then she must not be dead.”
Before Diana could continue to explain herself, the door to the room pushed open and the High Priestess entered, followed by the healer. Her lips pursed at the sight of Abigail. But she stood and curtsied to the High Priestess, something that didn't happen very often.
“I'd like to speak to Annarah alone once Abigail has checked her over.” She didn't look my way.
Diana nodded. “Of course.” She turned to me. “I'll come back and check on you later. You just focus on getting well.”
Abigail performed a cursory check on me, taking my vitals and making some observations, all in total silence. As she finished up, she nodded to the High Priestess and left the room.
Laying in the bed, I watched the facial expression of the High Priestess, wondering what she thought. I knew from the conversation I'd overheard that she didn't necessarily want to throw me out, but not much else. And she could change her mind at any time. The residents of the temple complex lived here only by her leave.
“Annarah. First off, how are you feeling?”
“Physically? I'll be fine, eventually.” Did she need to know so she wouldn't feel bad about telling me I needed to leave?
“I know you are suffering.” Her dark eyes pierced mine, and I saw no malice there. “Can you tell me what happened?”
This gave me the chance to tell my story, to tell her that what happened that day was not a result of my powers getting out of control. But for some reason, I found it hard to form the words. My throat closed up and didn't want to let them exit my mouth. Even my tongue seemed frozen. It took great effort just to swallow.
I shook my head, tears threatening again. “It wasn't my fault.” Barely audible, my words rasped through my dry lips.
She reached over to the bedside table and picked up the plastic water cup, helping me to get the straw in my mouth. Cool and fresh, it soothed my throat and her gesture gave me encouragement to keep going.
Once I got started, the words just gushed out. Every detail I could remember tumbled forth. I talked about the moments of silence when my internal alarm warned me something changed around us. I retold of the horses spooking and running off, leaving us with only our own two feet, which wound up not being fast enough to escape the rising water.
“It seemed alive. It just rushed up the sand and wrapped around our ankles, pulling us in. I didn't even try to use my magic until that very minute, I swear. I tried to push it back, but I wasn't strong enough. We just got drug under, then I lost sight of her as I tried not to drown myself. Eventually, I ended up on the beach where they found me. I don't know how. At that point, the water just looked like the normal river we always see.”
The High Priestess patted my hand, mulling over my words. For several minutes, she didn't speak. When she did, my body trembled, terrified of what she might be about to say.
“I believe you, child.”
Relief flooded me.
“But we will need to figure out a plan. Never has outside power managed to affect the land within the temple compound. Its protection has always been ironclad.” She hesitated. “I don't want to tire you while you are still healing. You've had a rough time, and I want you to recover fully. We will need to talk more, though.”
“You aren't going to make me leave?” The question was barely a whisper, and yet she still heard.
“Absolutely not. This is not your fault, no matter what anyone else thinks.” The addition to her sentence let me know that more than one person blamed the loss of Evie on me.
I bit my cheek and blinked the tears away as best I could. “High Priestess?”
“Yes, my child?” She met my eyes steadily.
“May I attempt to use my magic to heal myself? Would that be okay?”
Her gaze bore into me, and I could see her mulling over my request. “Do you believe you have healing abilities?”
“I'm... I'm not sure. But I feel the injuries internally, and I can feel a pull to send energy there. I just don't know what to do since I've been forbidden to use my powers.”
“You may do so right now, as I stand here.”
“I'm not really sure what I need to do, so I'm just going to follow my instincts if that's okay?”
She nodded, and I turned my focus inward. The pain throbbed in numerous areas and my lungs still burned from the river water. Closing my eyes, I let my inner self lead the way, following the light through my physical body to the areas of damage. Before too long, I felt sweat dripping down my forehead. While not gone, the pain was slightly less. I opened my eyes to see the High Priestess watching me intently.
“How do you feel now?”
“Better, I think? It's the kind of thing that would take a lot more practice if I was going to be any good at it.”
“For now, let's just stay here in the medical wing and let your body heal itself. You are, of course, excused from chores for now.” She spun to leave.
“Excuse me, please?”
She turned back toward me. “Yes?”
“Evie- Genevieve?” I choked on her full name. She preferred not to use it, but the priestesses insisted we use our given names instead of nicknames. “Is she really gone? There's no chance she is somewhere hurt? No chance at all?”
Her expression gentled as she met my eyes once last time. “I'm so sorry. She's gone, really and truly gone. We will hold a memorial for her soon.”
The tears clogged my throat and spilled down my cheeks. No matter how badly I wanted to, I couldn't acknowledge the High Priestess's apology. My heart shattered into a million pieces. Somehow, her enforcement of what the others said made it real, and made it final.
CHAPTER 6
Aside from the pain of a shattered heart, my physical injuries healed in good time and I returned to “normal” within a couple weeks' time. In that same time frame, I'd also become a pariah. Very few people spoke to me unless they absolutely had to, and I heard the whispers every time I passed by them. Time marched on and the weeks continued to pass by.
If I wasn't doing my daily chores, I huddled in my room, alone and despondent. Diana stopped by regularly to try and get me out of bed, but try as I might, I couldn't bring myself to care about anything.
After running off from the river, the horses made their way back to the barn, riderless, which had been the first indication to Toby that something must have happened while we were out. He tried getting me to come by the stable and work with them as I'd loved to before, but I couldn't seem to even step through the door without Evie. Not yet.
One morning, I sat at the edge of the pool in the laundry area scrubbing linens, lost in thought. Footsteps approached me from behind, which I ignored. That choice garnered me a solid shove from behind, knocking me off the ledge and into the water face first. The sheet I'd been working with wrapped around me like a net, making getting my head back above water a struggle.
By the time I unwound myself and caught my breath, whoever pushed me was long gone and nobody occupied the room but myself. Tears mingled with the water running in rivulets from my hair and down my face. Diana happened to come in before I got dried off and ran to my side.
“Annarah! What in heaven's name happened here?” She reached out and pulled me to my feet, grabbing a towel from the stack and wrapping it around my shoulders.
“I must have lost my balance. I fell in.” The last thing I wanted was to talk about it.
“Annarah Grace, lying is a sin, and you know it. I may be getting older, but I am not getting any stupider. You have never fallen into the washing pool. And don't think I am now aware of at least some of what has been going on around here.” She fixed me with a stern glare.
“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lie to you. I just don't want to cause any more drama.”
“Then tell me what happened right now, or I will get the High Priestess and there will be drama for days if I have any say in the matter.”
“Please don't!” I held up my hands, as if that might ward off any action she considered taking. “I was sitting here at the edge scrubbing this sheet. Someone came up behind me and pushed me in. I didn't see them because when I heard the footsteps, I assumed they were just passing through. I've been mostly avoiding any interaction with anyone.”
“Annarah! How often is this happening?”
“Diana, please. Can we just not worry about it?”
“Spill. Now.”
I blew my breath out between pursed lips. “This is the first time anyone has pushed me into a pool.”
She raised her eyebrows. “But?”
Of course she'd pick up on my evasiveness. “Well. I've found chicken poop in my bed, smeared into my sheets. I picked up some of my clothes from the drying line with slashes cut into them. There have been notes left in my room. Everybody whispers about me when I walk by. They all believe that I killed Evie and some of you are trying to hide that from them. They don't know or understand why. And they all want me gone.”
This time, I didn't even cry. With effort, I managed to separate her death from the things that were happening to me, even though they were inextricably tied. There was no reason to cry for myself when I believed I deserved everything I got from the others.
“Annarah. Why didn't you say something? To any one of us? This is not okay. Nobody should be doing these things to you.”
“I should leave. But this is the only home I know. The goddess has not stripped me of my powers, nor expelled me from her temple when I go to worship. I still dream. So what am I to do?”
“Oh, my child.”
“I have no money. I can't just walk out the front gates and rent an apartment or get a job. I wouldn't even know where to start. Or how. I'm absolutely useless anywhere else in the world, and I'm not wanted here.”
“You are wanted here. Not just by me and the High Priestess, but the Goddess Selene herself. And others. But most especially the goddess. As you mentioned, she has not denied you access to her in any way.”
“But... If she wants me here, why I am so miserable? Why is she allowing these things to happen to me? Why didn't she protect Evie?”
At the utterance of her name, the tears threatened to fall, but I managed to choke them down. If possible, Diana looked even more sorry for me than she had when she first found me wet and shivering.
“Oh honey, I wish I had answers for you. I really do. But I don't. Far be it for me to even begin to guess the motive behind the decisions the goddess makes. But we are going to have to do something about this. We are going to talk to the High Priestess and come up with a solution.”
She stood, tugging my hand to pull me upright with her. At first I resisted, but I needed to go back to my room and get dry clothes either way, so I let her help me up. Together, we walked back down the hall toward the exit.
Just as we reached the end of the corridor, Priestess Pia showed up, eliciting a sigh from me. She immediately pounced on the fact that I was leaving the wash house.
“Where are you going? I know you aren't finished with your chores.”
“Do you know that because you happen to be the one responsible for trying to drown her not that long ago?” Diana's words seethed with a quiet venom.
Pia had the good sense to at least pretend to be shocked at the allegation. “I guarantee you I do not know what you're talking about.” She looked me up and down. “Why are you wet?”
Diana huffed. “I just told you someone tried to drown her in the washing pool. I know you are not deaf.”
Gently, I touched Diana's shoulder. “It's okay. Let's just go.” I turned to Pia and spoke as neutrally as possible. “I'm just getting dry clothes on and I will be back to finish the washing.” Leaving her in my wake, I continued down the corridor.
“You probably lost your balance and fell in. Nobody here is going to try and hurt you, Annarah.”
My temper got the better of me and I spun back around to face her. “No? Do not pretend that you would have any feelings of sorrow if I had been the one to drown in that river or come to any other end. You do not bother to hide your dislike of me, and I am neither blind nor stupid.”
Priestess Pia sputtered with indignation. “How dare you? As if any of us are to blame for not wanting a murderer in our midst. One of us could be next. Nobody here wants to live in fear, constantly looking over our shoulder.”
Refusing to let her see me cry, I bit the inside of my cheek until it bled and marched down the hall and out the door without another word. Diana could be heard telling her off before I heard her footsteps almost running to catch up with me. She tugged on my shoulder to slow me down, but all I wanted was to get back to the privacy of my room before anyone saw me cry.
Yanking my door open, I rushed through the doorway, only to slip in a puddle on the floor and land flat on my back. My skull cracked into the flooring and I saw stars for a moment before focusing on Diana kneeling beside me.
“Are you okay?”
I squeezed my eyes tightly closed and waited for the nausea to pass. “I'll be fine.”
“Let me help you sit up.”
Once in a sitting position, I took in the room. Water covered most of the floor. Anything that had been sitting on the floor was soaked, some of my things ruined. Despite my hands being wet, I rubbed them over my face. Whoever had done this must have carried numerous buckets of water or left the water in the bathroom running for quite some time.
Before I could get to my feet and fetch towels to clean it up, I heard a surprised gasp from the door.
The High Priestess stood with one hand on the knob, taking in the scene. “What on earth happened here?”
I struggled to my feet. “I'm so sorry. I'll get some towels and clean it up right away.”
Diana rested her hand on my shoulder. “High Priestess, there are some things we need to discuss.”
The leader of our temple complex inclined her head in agreement. “I would say so.”
CHAPTER 7
With a wave of her hand, the High Priestess dried the floor, my belongings, and even the clothes I wore. In seconds, no evidence existed that my quarters had been a flood plane. She turned to Diana and me and gestured for us to follow.
“Will the two of you come with me, please?”
With a slight wobble, I got to my feet. The other two women frowned slightly but didn't say anything to me. We crossed the compound in silence, making it obvious the High Priestess was taking us not to her office, but to her private living space.
Everyone we passed on the way watched us with interest. Some tried to pretend they weren't, and others stared boldly. My eyes remained trained straight ahead of me and I pretended not to notice the attention we had garnered.
The door opened at her approach and she waved us through. “Please come in.”
As the door shut behind us, I took a moment to look around. Never before had I been invited to her private home. I'd been in her office many times, but this visit made the first for me. Diana didn't seem to feel out of place, but I didn't know if she'd ever been here before.
“Thank you for seeing us, High Priestess.” Diana spoke in a friendly but formal tone.
“Please, make yourselves comfortable.” She gestured toward the sofa. “Can I get you anything to drink? Tea, or perhaps cocoa?”
Both Diana and I nodded, and a tray appeared on the coffee table before us with service for three. The High Priestess sat in a green armchair opposite us and invited us to help ourselves.
As we poured tea, I took in the room around us. Its decoration ran exactly opposite to the rest of the complex. Where most of the buildings were sleek and minimal, this room felt homey and comfortable.
Warm wood floors boasted a large floral rug. The green furniture complemented the rug perfectly. Beige walls were bright without being stark. Even the sheer curtains flowed in such a way that the room felt alive.
“Your home is absolutely lovely.” I couldn't refrain from commenting on it.
Sometimes, in my dreams, I had my own place. Small and nothing fancy, but all mine to decorate however I fancied. In my imagination, I might choose patterns and colors such as these because they felt so soothing and peaceful.
“Thank you. Now, what in heaven's name is going on?”
Before I could get a word out, Diana launched into the laundry list of treatment the others had been inflicting on me for weeks on end. Months at this point. Her voice vibrated with anger as she got to that morning’s shenanigans that almost left me drowned in the washing pool.
“And then you saw her room. Someone ran enough water in there to flood the entire place while they knew she would be somewhere else taking care of her chores.”
The High Priestess listened to everything Diana had to say and then turned to me. “Child, why did you not come to me and say something?”
My chin wobbled slightly as I looked at her. “I didn't want to be a complainer. If I tattled, then I figured it would only make things worse. They all hate me now. I've always been different, but before, they didn't blame me for anything bad, just being different. Now? They think I killed Evie. They all believe that it was my runaway magic that got her killed. They all want me to leave, and I'm not sure they're wrong.” My voice cracked, but I didn't cry.
She pressed her lips together and twined her fingers together in her lap. Diana sat silently and waited for a response. The longer the silence carried on, the more worried I became.
