The dover cafe at war, p.12
The Dover Cafe at War, page 12
‘I know. But what are we supposed to do? There’s nowhere for us to go where we can be like any other couple. Where we can just kiss each other on the cheek even, hold hands . . . It’s not illegal, you know, to be like me.’
‘But it is illegal to be caught in the act, and you know it, so don’t try to plead innocent.’
‘You have no idea. No idea at all what it’s like to be me.’ Jimmy’s eyes sparked with fury and frustration. ‘Tell me, how was Donny conceived? Was that an act of public indecency? Somewhere in the fields, hidden by the long grass? Because if so, then you have no right to lecture me.’
Marianne coloured. He was far too close to the truth, and the memory made her feel dirty. She turned her head away, allowing the wind to cool her suddenly hot cheeks. If she was honest, she’d never considered this; never equated her experience with Jimmy’s.
‘That’s not fair, Jim! And anyway, look what happened to me! It didn’t end well, did it? And what I’ve been through is nothing compared to what might happen to you if you get caught!’
Jimmy sighed. ‘I’m sorry, sis. You’re right. That was below the belt. But you shouldn’t worry about us, you know. No one seems to care anymore. Things are changing.’
‘Are they really, Jim? Or is that wishful thinking?’
‘You think we’re the only ones? You’d be surprised. Anyway, I don’t want to argue on my last day here, so if I promise to be careful, will you promise to stop worrying?’
‘How can I? If you got found out . . .’ She looked away, her shoulders slumping. She didn’t want to argue either. ‘I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have got angry with you. But I can’t help thinking about that article Mum was reading that day, and it scares me. Have things really changed that much?’
He shrugged. ‘I don’t know. You know, when I was young, when Colin and I . . . well, we had no idea it was considered wrong. We didn’t even think it would mean we wouldn’t get married. It was just fun . . . curiosity.’
Marianne wasn’t sure she wanted to picture this, but she forced herself to keep listening, looking at him steadily.
‘But then . . . well, I tried to feel the same way with girls, I really did. But I just don’t. That’s all there is to it. I just don’t. And neither does Colin.’
Marianne put her arm around him. ‘I don’t care either way, Jim, and if you say you’ll be careful, then that’s going to have to be enough.’
Jimmy grinned. ‘Anyway, enough about my love life. I want to know what went on between you and Alfie. The man couldn’t take his eyes off you all evening.’
‘There’s nothing going on with me and Alfie! He walked me home because he’s nice, that’s all. And he saved your bacon with a very impressive little dance in the pitch dark.’
‘Hmm, well, I think there’s more to it than that. Never seen him walk out on a performance before. Shame we’re all leaving. I always thought he might be just the man for you – someone to bring you out of your shell, show you some fun. And as for him, I don’t think he’s had much gentleness in his life.’ He smiled down at her. ‘He needs someone to look after him.’
She nodded sadly. ‘It sounds like he had a horrible time.’
‘Really? What did he tell you?’
‘You know, about his parents, the orphanage, John, the music . . .’ She trailed off, noticing his expression of astonishment.
‘He’s never said anything to us! I just assumed because he said he didn’t have anywhere to go on his leave this week . . . He must really like you.’
‘If he’s not told you he probably doesn’t want people to know. Then again, you men don’t really speak to each other, do you? If you put a roomful of girls together, before the day was out, we’d know every detail about each other’s lives.’
‘That’s because we men have more important things on our minds – you know, like ridding the world of an evil dictator while you girls sit around at home drinking tea and gossiping.’ He dodged away, laughing, before she could whack him.
‘Well, maybe you men could learn a thing or two from us; maybe if Hitler was more interested in gossiping we wouldn’t be in this mess. Anyway, I told Alfie he was welcome to come to us when he has leave. I wonder if he’ll take me up on it, though.’
‘I’ll make sure he does. Like I said, he needs someone like you in his life.’
‘Oh, stop it! The man was absolutely surrounded by women last night, he could take his pick. And none of them have a child. Plus, they’re younger.’
Jimmy rolled his eyes and put his arm around her. ‘I’d say Donny gives you a distinct advantage. Weeds out the scoundrels.’ He winked.
‘Weeds out all the others as well,’ she said ruefully.
‘Oh, I don’t know. There’s always Roger . . .’ This time he didn’t dodge away quickly enough as she hit him on the arm. He laughed. ‘Come on, sis, let’s get back. I spotted a very raw-looking joint of pork on the table, and I’m no expert, but I think it needs a couple of hours in the oven before we can eat it.’
‘Hell’s bells. I forgot. I told Rodney we’d be eating at one and you know what he’s like when he’s hungry and behind schedule!’
‘Oh no!’ Jimmy squealed, throwing his arms up in mock horror. ‘What are we going to do?’
‘Oh, shut up! Come on.’ She grabbed his hand and started to jog down the hill.
He pulled her back. ‘Tell you what, jump on my back and I’ll show you how fit and strong the army’s made me.’
‘I’ll crush you!’
‘I think I’ll manage.’ He bent down slightly, his arms held back, ready to catch her legs. ‘Come on! If you don’t want to incur the wrath of Rodney, jump on!’
So she did, and Jimmy stumbled theatrically down the hill, moaning about her weight, while she clung on, tears of laughter rolling down her cheeks. How she would miss Jimmy. She loved all her brothers and sisters, but she and Jimmy shared a special bond, probably because, in their different ways, they were both outsiders.
Coming back into the kitchen through the back door, Marianne was pleased to see that Lily had made a start on the lunch. A large pan of potatoes was on top of the range and she was now busily peeling carrots. But her eye was caught by a splash of colour on the small table by the wall.
‘Who are those for?’ She pointed at the bunch of yellow roses, their stems wrapped in newspaper.
Lily grinned at her. ‘Well, the note just said . . .’ She hunted around on the table until she found a scrap of paper and held it out to her.
‘“For the lady in the kitchen. Hope to see you soon”,’ Marianne read. Then she looked up, perplexed. ‘But who are they from?’
Lily shrugged. ‘There was a knock on the back door and when I opened it, these were on the doorstep.’ She held her hand over her heart and sighed. ‘It’s so romantic.’
‘Didn’t you see who left them?’
‘Nope. Just the flowers. I told you Alfie was interested.’
Jimmy snatched the note and looked at it with a frown. ‘Well, well. The man clearly knows what he wants.’
Marianne studied the scrap of paper and the memory of another anonymous note came back to her. She couldn’t remember what the writing had looked like, but the same feeling of anxiety and unease she’d felt then stirred within her again.
‘I don’t think they’re from Alfie,’ Marianne said. ‘I mean, why wouldn’t he just bring them himself?’
‘Of course they’re from Alfie! Anyone could see that he fancies you. I hope you invited him to lunch.’
Marianne shook her head distractedly. It was the only explanation, but it was strange that he didn’t feel able to deliver them personally. Maybe he was shyer than he seemed.
Despite Marianne’s worries, lunch was ready on time, and as they always used to on a Sunday, the family gathered in the café. Looking around, Marianne wondered when, or even if, they ever would again.
Throughout the lunch, Donny questioned the men minutely about army life, but he was particularly fascinated by Rodney’s job in the castle.
‘Uncle Rodney, do you really live in a tunnel?’
‘Yes, I share a room with a few others, we sleep in bunks. Very uncomfortable, and I miss having a window.’
‘But what do you do there?’
‘If I told you that, Don, then the war could be lost. Haven’t you heard: “Be like Dad, keep Mum”?’
Donny looked confused for a moment. ‘But I don’t have a dad to be like. He’s dead.’
‘You’ve got three dads, Donny, and they’re all sitting here,’ Marianne said, hoping to divert yet another conversation about his father.
‘You know what I mean. Last night Mum told me he was handsome and clever and that I was just like him. Do you think I am?’ He looked around the table at the rest of the family.
Marianne cleared her throat. ‘They never met him, love. So they don’t know.’
‘But if you were going to get married to him, how come they never met him?’
Marianne looked down at her plate, aware of everyone’s questioning gaze.
‘I hope you’re not suggesting your mum’s telling porkies, young man,’ Nellie admonished her grandson. ‘I met him once or twice, and I’d say you’re much more handsome. In fact, you’re almost as handsome as your uncles, who have been better dads to you than most.’
‘Was that a compliment, Mum?’ Bert put his hand over his heart. ‘Does that mean we can have a chocolate bar each?’
Nellie smirked at him. ‘Don’t let it go to your head, son. It’s about the only good thing I can say.’
Bert laughed and raised his glass. ‘Cheers, Mum. For a moment there I thought you were going soft.’
‘Huh. Not likely.’
‘But they’re not any good cos they can’t marry Mum. So unless she finds me a dad she can marry, me and Davey will always have to play in secret.’
Marianne put her hand on Donny’s. ‘But you’re forgetting that first I’d have to meet someone who wanted to marry me.’
‘But why wouldn’t they want to marry you? You’re soft and cuddly and bake the best cakes in the world.’
She laughed and kissed him on the cheek. ‘Ah, if only it was that easy, they’d be queueing out the door. But if I were to marry, it’d have to be someone special enough to be your dad.’
Lily came to her rescue then. ‘Sometimes dads aren’t all they’re cracked up to be, Don.’
There was an awkward silence, as the memory of their own father reared its head. It wasn’t something they needed reminding about just before Jimmy and Bert were sent off to fight in France – as their father had been twenty-five years before.
Realising what she’d done, Lily jumped up from her seat and raised her glass of water in the air. ‘Anyway, enough of all that. Edie, Marianne, Mum, Donny, stand up, and let’s raise a toast to our men.’
The others rose obediently.
‘I just want to say, before you two go off to who knows where to do who knows what, that like Mum said, you three have been the best dads a boy could wish for. Eh, Don?’
Donny nodded and sighed. ‘I suppose they’re better than nothing.’ He sounded so like Nellie that everyone chuckled.
‘But not only that, you are the best brothers we girls could have wished for. Even you, Rodney.’ She grinned cheekily at him, and he grinned back. ‘And Mum might deny it, but you’re also the best of sons. Right, Mum?’
Nellie nodded wordlessly, so Lily continued, ‘Come home quick, boys. Life’s too quiet without you.’
The men stood up then, and they clinked their glasses together over the middle of the table.
Seeming to have recovered his spirits after making everyone laugh, Donny piped up, ‘You better get home soon cos life’s not easy when you live in a house full of women.’
The table erupted with laughter again. Marianne tried to join in, but her throat felt tight. Lily’s words had inadvertently brought the danger her brothers faced home to her. She glanced at them, glad they were smiling, but wondering if they, too, were hiding their fears. Finally her gaze rested on her mother. Nellie was smiling bravely, but her cheeks were wet with tears.
On the other side of the road, hidden in the shadows of the covered market, a man watched the family scene through the large café window. How touching, he thought with a smirk. It would be a shame to break up the family, but still, there were enough of them that they wouldn’t notice if one was missing.
Chapter 13
The following morning breakfast service was in full swing, and, as there simply wasn’t enough room to fit everyone in, Nellie had decided to offer sandwiches to go. This meant there was a queue of people at the counter that went back all the way to the door, causing much grumbling from those lucky enough to get a seat as their tables were knocked by the people queuing. Nellie had tried to persuade Edie to stay for an hour or two to help out, but she had left the minute she was dressed, not even stopping for breakfast. As for Lily, she was in the scullery trying to keep up with the washing up while Donny dried. Jimmy and Bert, who were due to get an early train back to Canterbury to re-join their regiment, were sitting at the small table in the corner of the kitchen demolishing plates of eggs, bacon, fried bread and tomato, while Marianne stood at her usual spot by the stove with five skillets on the go. It was only eight o’clock and already the sweat was pouring down her back, but for many of the men, this would be their last breakfast in England, so she wanted to make sure they went off with a good meal inside them.
‘Knock knock!’ a voice called through the kitchen door. ‘Blimey, talk about dog eat dog! Have you seen it out there?’ It was Alfie, carrying his kit bag in one hand and his trumpet case in the other.
‘Mate!’ Bert got up from the small table by the wall and clapped him on the shoulder. ‘Yup. It’s the last supper – or should I say breakfast. Let’s get out from under everyone’s feet and go and have a cup of tea and a fag upstairs. Train doesn’t leave for a couple of hours, so plenty of time. You coming too, John?’
Without waiting to be asked, John had slipped through to the scullery and out of the corner of her eye Marianne could see him put his arm around Lily’s waist and plant a kiss on her cheek. Lily slapped him on the chest with a soapy hand. ‘If you want to make yourself useful, I reckon Donny could find you a clean tea towel!’ she told him sharply.
Laughing, John backed away to the stairs. ‘Sorry, darlin’. Some of us have a war to fight.’ He looked at Alfie. ‘You coming?’
‘Be right there.’ He hovered behind Marianne, jumping out of the way when she turned to slide food on to some waiting plates, before dumping them on the hatch.
‘Sorry, Alfie. Just a bit busy. I meant to say, thanks ever so for the flowers.’ She was relieved she couldn’t look at him because now, in the cold light of day and after what Jim had said to her, she felt mortified about Saturday night.
He looked puzzled. ‘Flowers?’
Marianne turned back to the stove, using one hand to crack more eggs, and another to flip the fried bread. ‘You know, the roses. I just thought . . .’ She turned her head to look at him. ‘Oh. It wasn’t you.’ Her cheeks flamed with embarrassment. Of course they weren’t from him. What was she thinking? But overriding her embarrassment, she felt the anxiety she’d pushed aside return, sitting like a hard ball of lead in her stomach.
‘Marianne! Today, if you don’t mind! We’ve got hungry soldiers waiting for their sarnies, and they can’t fight that raving lunatic on empty stomachs!’ At Nellie’s words, a cheer went up from the queue, and, flustered, Marianne loaded up a baking tray with more bacon and stuck it in the oven. What else could she do? With only five rings, she couldn’t perform miracles.
‘Can I do anything?’ Alfie’s voice made her jump.
‘Here, Mr Lomax, you couldn’t help us with the washing up?’ Donny was holding a dry tea towel out to him. He eyed the trumpet case that Alfie had set down by the scullery. ‘Are you going to play?’ he asked hopefully.
‘No. I was going to ask you a very big favour. Do you reckon you could keep her safe for me while I’m away?’
Donny nodded eagerly.
‘Take good care of her, mind.’
‘I promise.’ Donny snatched up the case and took it down to the basement.
Meanwhile, Alfie took off his jacket, rolled up his sleeves and went into the scullery, where he started to dry a plate.
Marianne watched in disbelief. He’d really meant it when he offered to help? Even her own brothers had ducked out of service. Her heart warmed towards him. Who needed flowers when a man helped with the washing up? But if Alfie hadn’t left the flowers, then who?
At nine o’clock, Marianne collapsed into the kitchen chair with a groan. Gladys came through with some more plates and dumped them in the sink in the scullery and sank into the chair next to her. She looked at Alfie, who was still drying up. ‘Alfie Lomax, you are a prince among men. Look at ’im, Nellie,’ she called through the kitchen door.
Nellie poked her head through the hatch. ‘Marianne, how can you let one of our serving boys do the washing up? Where are Lily and Donny?’
‘School, Mum, remember? And before you start, you’re the one who insisted she stay on to take her final exams.’
Nellie huffed. ‘The sacrifices I’ve made for that girl’s education. Thank God you weren’t that way inclined. Started cooking for the punters at fourteen, Alfie. Couldn’t keep her out of the kitchen.’
‘And from what I’ve tasted she’s not wasted any of those years.’ He smiled warmly.
‘Glad, get Alfie a cuppa then come back in here, will you?’ Nellie gave her friend a meaningful look.
‘But—’
‘Just do it, for gawd’s sake!’
Gladys huffed and got up to do as she was told. ‘I don’t know why I put up with that woman,’ she grumbled. ‘Who does she think she is, orderin’ me about like that?’
‘Glad, you know you don’t mean that,’ Marianne said placatingly. The truth was, Gladys would do anything for Nellie. Gladys’s husband had been killed during the last war. Unfortunately, they’d only married the day before he went away, and she’d been left destitute when the landlord had thrown her out of the rooms they’d just moved into. Nellie had seen Gladys sleeping under one of the market stalls, and brought her in and fed her. And there she’d stayed until after the war when Nellie had somehow managed to browbeat the local MP into looking into the injustice and making sure she got her pension. She’d even lent her money to get her flower stall up and running.
