Wicked heir, p.31
Wicked Heir, page 31
She cracked a small smile. She had forgotten that Alastair mentioned he knew her father. Saoirse desperately wanted to hear stories of him, but this wasn’t the time. She would have to ask Alastair later on.
“Thank you,” Saoirse said. “For everything. I’ve felt more at home here than I did in Ireland. Even in spite of what Kieran has done.”
“I’m glad to hear that.” Alastair stood and extended his hand. “Well, I better not keep you much longer. I’m sure you have much more exhilarating plans than listen to me blather on.”
Saoirse accepted his hand and rose out of her seat, following him to the office door. Her heart felt a little lighter after confiding with Alastair. She was a bit conflicted knowing Emrys had a troublesome relationship with him, but both fireannaich had the same intention to protect her as best they could. If anything, it made her feel more comfortable and secure in the house.
Emrys waited patiently outside the door of his father’s office. It felt like an hour had passed before he heard the click of the doorknob and immediately perked up when the door opened to reveal his mate. Her eyes were slightly swollen, and her nose had a rosy tint to it, but she didn’t look as fearful and anxious as she had been before stepping into the room. Instead, she looked content, as if the weight of the world had been removed from her shoulders.
Saoirse stepped towards him and wrapped her arms around his waist. He planted a kiss in her hair and embraced her.
“Are you alright?” he asked in a low voice.
She nodded as she pressed her cheek to his chest.
“I hate to ask this, but can I have a few words with Emrys in private?” Alastair asked from the doorway of his office.
Saoirse lifted her eyes to Emrys, and he kissed her gently.
“Go see Ada or Seraphina. I’ll find you afterward, alright?”
She nodded and slid her arms from him. He missed her warmth immediately as he watched her disappear down the stairs. Once she was gone, Emrys entered his father’s office and debated sitting in one of the chairs at his father’s desk.
“I was afraid my assumption would be true,” his father said, still standing. “There are going to be consequences for Kieran.”
“There are?” Emrys asked, his brows raising in surprise.
Alastair nodded, his expression a mix of anger and resentment. “He deserves more than a black eye from you in the hallway and a slap in front of the court.” He leveled a gaze with his son. “I’ll be removing him as general.”
Emrys thought he misheard his father. His eyes widened as he stared in bewilderment at him. “You are?” he asked.
His father nodded again. Determination gleamed in his eyes, and it made a shiver run through Emrys. “Yes, he’s gone too far in the last month, and he needs to be held accountable for his monstrous actions. Between the way he’s bullied the Duke of Donheath, engaged in brawls in my hallways, and now what he’s done to Saoirse…” Alastair sighed. “I’ve let him get away with too much.”
Emrys’s jaw hung open. He wanted to be wary of his father’s words, but after seeing the look on Saoirse’s face when she left this office, he had little room to doubt Alastair. “I support you, Father.”
“Thank you,” Alastair said. “I’ll let you get back to your wife now.”
Emrys nodded and made his way to the door.
“Oh, one last thing,” his father said, making Emrys stop in his tracks. “Saoirse is quite lucky to have you as her spouse. I think your mother would be proud of you.”
A knot formed in Emrys’s throat. He attempted an appreciative smile and nodded. His father rarely brought up his mother, but since Emrys had married Saoirse, Alastair had brought her up several times. It pulled at old wounds, ones that Emrys had thought he had closed decades ago. What had he missed by having his mother ripped from him so young? Would he have made different choices in his life?
Emrys pushed those thoughts away as he always did, and when his father turned his attention to his desk, he slipped into the hall and down the stairs.
He found Saoirse in the kitchen enjoying a cup of tea with Ada and Rory. A warm smile tugged at his lips when he saw her lost in conversation with the house manager and housekeeper. The mating spark made itself known as Saoirse met his gaze and smiled back at him.
“Hello,” he said, placing a hand on her back and kissing her temple. “Are you still alright?”
She nodded. “I’m actually starting to feel much better than I have in the last few days.”
“Good.” He stroked his hand along her spine and felt her tiny flinch, as if she had been hit with a surge of electricity. He knew she had felt the mating spark, and he once again debated sharing the truth.
Saoirse was in a better place than when he took advantage of one of the elements of the mating bond to relieve her pain. But what if she was still emotionally fragile and didn’t take it well? She had spent the last week reliving the worst moment of her life. Revealing the bond could pile onto that and cause all the work he put in to gain her trust to unravel.
He shook the thoughts and doubts from his mind and spent a few minutes with Ada and Rory alongside Saoirse. He was caught up on the staff gossip, a favorite pastime of Ada’s. But when she offered him his own cup of tea, he graciously declined and bid them goodbye to escort Saoirse upstairs.
“What did your father say?” she asked as he closed the sitting room door.
Emrys crossed the room to his bar cart and poured a glass of amber liquor, hesitating to answer her. “Do you want a drink?” he asked. He needed liquor more than tea after the emotional whiplash his father put him through.
“No, thank you,” she answered as she leaned against the arm of the sofa. Emrys sipped his drink and avoided meeting her gaze. “Emrys.” Her soft voice was too nice to avoid. He looked up, and she asked again. “What did your father want to speak to you about?”
“He told me my mother would be proud of me.” Emrys leaned against the back of the sofa and took a sip of his liquor. He relished the burn in his throat as he swallowed it.
“That was nice of him.” Saoirse gave a small smile. “Maybe he does give two straws about you.”
Emrys huffed a laugh. “I think he only gives two straws about me because I’m married to you.”
“Regardless, he notices you, and he’s proud of you.”
Emrys stared down into his glass, unable to absorb any truth of her observation. “He’s going to punish Kieran,” he added.
Silence came from Saoirse. He peeked up at Saoirse to see all amusement had been flushed from her face and her skin had gone pale. “Punish him how?” she asked, her voice beginning to waver.
“He’s removing him as general.” The words didn’t seem real as he spoke them out loud.
“What?” Her hand shook as she raised it to brush the tiny strands of hair at her hairline. “He-He’s stripping him of his rank? Because of me?” Saoirse shook her head in disbelief, and Emrys quickly jumped to explain she wasn’t at fault.
“He’s done more to warrant this than just what he’s done to you. He’s been a menace in council meetings and has pushed us closer to a war we could have avoided. He has ignored my father’s warnings and hid behind his rank to avoid responsibility.”
Saoirse’s chin wobbled as she fidgeted with her hair and clothes. “But that’s now how he’ll see it. He’s going to assume it’s because of me. I burned him for what he did. You boxed him. Andromeda slapped him. And now he’s having his rank removed. He’s going to think it’s because of me!”
“He’s not going to—”
“I don’t want to be here,” she interrupted. “I don’t want to be in this house when Alastair strips Kieran of his position. You can tell me I’m not at fault all you want, but that doesn’t mean he won’t take his revenge out on me…or you.”
Emrys hadn’t thought about himself as being a target of retaliation. Kieran could easily turn on Emrys rather than Saoirse. She had a handful of people ready to make his life miserable if he touched her again. But if he made Emrys’s life miserable? It would be much harder to prove, and Emrys couldn’t guarantee his father would step in like he did for Saoirse.
“Emrys.” Saoirse’s eyes were wide, and he could see how shallow her breathing was.
He scrambled for an idea. Somewhere he could take her to be safe for a few days. His mind landed on the one place Kieran couldn’t go looking for them.
“I know somewhere we can go.”
She froze at his words, and Emrys waited patiently for her to confirm how much she trusted him. “Where?”
“Go pack a bag.” He leveled a stare with her, waiting for her to agree.
“Where are we going? What should I pack? How many days?”
“Pack whatever necessities you need and make sure they’ll last a few days.”
“Emrys, I trust you, but where would you be taking me?”
I trust you.
He gained the one thing he had been after since he met her. She trusted him, and he could finally breathe easier.
“A cottage,” he finally answered. “Seraphina and Ada own it, but since they live here, it’s unoccupied. It’s near the North Sea, and Kieran doesn’t know anything about it.”
She nodded in understanding and contemplated his offer for one last moment. He reminded himself she trusted him and she wasn’t contemplating if it was safe. She was contemplating if it was indeed right to flee or not.
“Okay,” she said softly. “I’ll go pack.”
32
Saoirse wasn’t sure what she expected the cottage to look like, but what she found was exactly what she would expect Seraphina and Ada to call home. After riding on horseback for two hours, she and Emrys came to a cottage that was a mile from the beach. While the exterior showed some wear and tear due to its proximity to the ocean, it had been built to withstand what was probably centuries of use. The two stories of cream-colored stones were weathered in places, but the terracotta-tiled roof looked nearly untouched. The only other obvious sign of the home’s age was the porch creaking under her boots.
As Emrys opened the front door, Saoirse was greeted by the smell of cloves and other spices. The kitchen was the first room to welcome them. The counters were clean, and the space was small with a simple sink, stove, and table. A cozy dining room was to the left, and a sitting room sat on the other side of the kitchen wall. A large brick hearth was built against the wall and, with the chill of the sea air, Saoirse imagined herself curling up on the worn sofa with a cup of tea and enjoying the dancing flames of a fire.
She turned in place where the dining room, kitchen, and sitting room bled into each other and took in the pale blue walls of the interior and the worn, scuffed floors. She could feel the love of Ada and Seraphina’s family woven into every inch of the house.
“There’s a bedroom this way,” Emrys said, pointing to a door at the opposite side of the kitchen and pulling her from her thoughts. “And three bedrooms upstairs. You’re welcome to choose whatever room you’d like.”
“I’d like the one down here,” she answered.
“Very well. The layout of the house is pretty easy to navigate, and I don’t think you’ll have any difficulty finding what you need.”
He closed the front door and placed their luggage into the downstairs bedroom. When he returned to the kitchen, he rummaged in the cabinets for ingredients to make something for dinner. “I’m not sure what I’ll find to make dinner,” he commented as he sniffed a block of cheese.
“I thought you said Seraphina and Ada haven’t lived here in years.” Saoirse leaned her elbows on the kitchen table.
“They haven’t, but there’s usually one of us who has been here in the last week.”
“One of us?” Saoirse asked.
“Ada and Seraphina’s children,” Emrys answered simply. “We all have full access to the cottage and have an unspoken rule to leave some food in the icebox or cupboards for whoever comes next.” He looked over his shoulder at Saoirse with a cheeky grin. “Except for me.”
“Why are you the exception?” she asked, the corner of her lip tugging upward.
He returned his attention back to the cabinets and pulled a few things out that Saoirse couldn’t make out. “Because I’m the baby, of course.”
Her lips pulled up into a full grin, and her shoulders shook a bit. As her giggles settled, she looked around the cottage and noticed how quiet and empty it was. “How did you know no one would be here?”
“I didn’t.” He turned towards her and plopped a loaf of bread, that cheeky smile still on his lips. “I took a gamble.”
She huffed a laughed as she shook her head. Emrys found cold cuts of meat and fresh cheese in icebox and added them on the table alongside the bread. He pieced the ingredients together and presented a finished sandwich on a plate to Saoirse. She took a small bite, but her stomach still felt unsettled from earlier.
Her thoughts continued to return to Fearynhurst and every potential reaction Kieran could have. She wanted him to be punished, but she assumed he would get a few responsibilities or privileges revoked, not be stripped of his entire job. With the timing of his latest transgression, there was no doubt he would connect the punishment to her and target her for his revenge.
“Saoirse,” Emrys said gently. “You’re going to be safe.”
“I know,” she whispered. “But—”
“No ‘but.’” He closed the space between them and cradled her face in his hands. “I will keep you safe as long as you trust me to do so.”
“I have no plans to stop trusting you.”
“Good.” A small grin graced his lips before he pressed a kiss to her forehead.
They continued eating their meager dinner, and Saoirse found herself missing Ada and her staff’s indulgent cooking already. Emrys took their empty plates to the sink as Saoirse moved to the sitting room. She shook the anxiety out of her mind long enough to muster a bit of flame to light the hearth. Delicious heat brushed against her, and she smiled to herself.
Saoirse heard the squeal of a kettle in the kitchen and moments later, Emrys appeared with two large ceramic mugs that had lopsided rims. He handed one to her, and she breathed in the comforting scent of Ada’s special blend of tea.
“Did one of Ada and Seraphina’s children make these mugs?” she asked as she took a sip, feeling warmth inside her as well as outside.
“No, Seraphina did,” Emrys answered, fighting a laugh. He took a few steps towards the worn ivory sofa and plopped down comfortably on it. “She took it up long before I was born and I’m sure dropped it not long after. Case in point.” He lifted his own misshapen mug.
Saoirse also stifled her laugh, covering her grin with another sip. She joined him on the sofa and stretched her legs out onto his lap. Her fears of Kieran were slowly fading the longer they were in the cottage. They were alone without staff, visitors, or Alastair. The respite was shaping up to feel like a honeymoon.
A new fear struck her, and she hid her shaking hands by sipping her tea. As fulfilling as sharing uninterrupted time with Emrys was, it wouldn’t be long before they tried to be intimate. And she would fade out of the moment, interrupting it.
She dropped her gaze to her tea and tried not to let their future disappointment ruin this quiet moment.
“What are you thinking?” Emrys asked.
She glanced up at him, and her cheeks flushed to a rosy shade. “Nothing,” she murmured.
“I know it’s not nothing. You’re thinking so loudly I can’t find any peace in this room.” His half-smile eased her, and she attempted to return it.
“I’m worried what will happen if we have sex,” she answered in a small voice. She didn’t mean to say it so bluntly, but she felt compelled to be as forward as possible with the truth.
“You shouldn’t,” Emrys said.
“What if the same thing that happened at Andromeda’s happens here?”
“Then we work through it.” He wrapped his hand around her ankle and gave it a squeeze. “We haven’t tried since that night, so there’s no telling what will happen.”
“I’m sorry.” Her throat clogged, strangling her words.
“You have nothing to be sorry for.”
“But I do. I trapped you in this. I saw a way out of my miserable life and took it. You deserve better.”
She braced for his realization and subsequent exit. But it never came. Instead, she felt the warmth of his hand on her calf.
“That’s absolutely not true.” His tone was gentle, and Saoirse felt the familiar pinch and burn of tears forming behind her eyes.
“It is,” she argued, her voice cracking. “You deserve better than the mess I am. You deserve someone who doesn’t have the scar of a neglectful family. You deserve better than someone who has nightmares and panics when she sees her former lover. And you deserve someone who doesn’t fade away in intimacy. I’m sure you could have found someone that offered much more than I could.”
“I am not perfect,” he whispered as his hand stroked her leg. “And I definitely don’t deserve someone who is perfect.”
“But you deserve better than me.” Her voice cracked again, but she held back tears.
“Maybe that’s true, but I don’t want anyone but you.” She tried to give him a smile, but it came off as a grimace. “And I want all of you. I want every dark corner and bright spot. I want to love every last part of you.”
Saoirse felt her heart drop, and her tears dissolved instantly. Emrys’s face remained calm as she stared at him.
“You don’t have to feel the same. I don’t expect you to. But I love you, Saoirse, and you deserve that.”
Love.
He said he loved her. She couldn’t think of the last time someone had said those words to her. There may have never been a time she heard those words directed at her. She sat numbly as it sunk in.
As if sensing her overwhelm, Emrys carefully extracted her mug of tea from her hands and moved it to a nearby table. He pulled her into his arms and cradled her in his lap.
