Lily harper complete s.., p.199
lily harper - complete series, page 199
“What are you thinking about?” Asterion asked as he looked down at me with a concerned smile.
“Alaire.” It wasn’t until I finished saying his name that I realized I was gripping my sword hilt to the point of white-knuckling it.
“Given his reputation,” Asterion said, tactfully ignoring my tight grip. “I’m rather surprised at how slovenly an ambush he set up for us at the club.”
“Yeah, definitely not one of his better efforts,” I agreed, forcing my sword hand to relax. I could feel the ache from the strain and had to shake my hand out. “That attack at the Toy Store was a lot scarier and more coordinated.”
Asterion tapped his chin in thought and I was suddenly overcome with the want, the need, to kiss him. I quickly looked away and took a few deep breaths, trying to get control of myself.
“You seem to be a continuous blind spot in his calculations, Lily. I have never seen Alaire in such a constant state of frustration, where you are concerned. Dare I suggest he… might be in love with you?”
“Ha! Alaire isn’t capable of love,” I spat out, shaking my head.
“You might be surprised,” Asterion said and glanced down at me with eyebrows drawn.
“Yeah… no. Alaire’s not in love with me. He just doesn’t like losing.”
Asterion nodded, those long obsidian locks framing his face. I had to look away. “I am not certain what to make of Alaire,” he said, his expression turning thoughtful. “Regardless... within mere seconds of calling Uriel, Alaire asked to speak to you. It therefore follows that you were his primary focus all along.” He looked away as if he’d heard something, before turning back at me. “If I may ask, what exactly did he wish to speak to you about?”
“My mom,” I said, feeling my mouth go dry at how Alaire had used her to torment me. “Before this last trip, he kept calling me, saying he was going to pay her a visit.”
I could see the Minotaur’s rage in Asterion’s eyes as he growled, “If he did anything that foolish…”
“He didn’t, he didn’t,” I quickly reassured him, putting a hand on his chest, which I instantly regretted because he was just so warm and muscular and… masculine. Ah, Sorcha was going to be the death of me! Unless this reaction wasn’t all her’s... “But it wasn’t from lack of trying,” I continued, forcing my attention back to the subject. “Someone cut Alaire off from being able to access her and he thought I had something to do with it.”
“But you didn’t?”
Despite the topic, I found myself smiling. “No,” I said, shaking my head. “I’m as much in the dark on that subject as Alaire is! Not that I could convince him of as much.”
I saw fear begin to replace the anger in Asterion’s eyes. “Now I’m even more grateful we slew those demons at the club. Alaire wanting to know the truth usually means the unlucky victim being taken alive and tortured.”
The way he said the words, I knew he had first-hand knowledge. “Is that what he did to you?”
The way he hung his head, I wanted to reach out and wrap my arms around him, to hold him and tell him I would never allow anyone to hurt him again. But, I didn’t. I just continued walking.
“Yes, during his hunt for Uriel...” his voice died away.
“What happened?” I cleared my throat. “I mean… if you want to talk about it.”
He nodded but there was a hesitancy still there, all the same. “He tortured me day and night for so long… I can’t even remember how long now. The pain I suffered... there came a point when I couldn’t handle it anymore. I broke.”
“What does that mean?”
“I told him,” Asterion answered with a shrug. “I finally gave him the information he so desperately wanted.”
“You told him where Uriel was?”
Asterion nodded. “And I have never forgiven myself for that betrayal.”
What could I do in the face of that admission but grab his hand and squeeze it as hard as I could? “You were in an impossible situation,” I whispered. “Besides, Uriel doesn’t seem to hold it against you.”
Asterion breathed in deeply. “Like all archangels, he sees more than us. Perhaps that’s why.”
I had this urge then… this burning need to grab him around the neck and pull him into a kiss. He was hurt and lonely and so vulnerable and so perfect and…
Oh my God, what am I thinking?! That alarm was enough to make me loosen my grip on his hand and drop it. I could see a small bit of hurt on his face but it was still better this way.
Clearing his throat, Asterion said, “I couldn’t help but notice how you’ve not used your Awakened power since we returned to Edinburgh.”
My turn to wince. That was another subject I didn’t like to talk about. “Yeah, great idea—I might as well set off fireworks to let everyone know where we are.”
He nodded at me with deference. “A very sensible reason to refrain from such a display, I agree. But we both know that reason is anything but the true one.”
“What makes you so sure of that?”
“Because I know you, Lily. What our bond has left out, my experience with you has filled in. Between the two, I know how ill at ease you are with what you have inside you.”
“If by ‘ill at ease’, you mean ‘scared shitless’, then you’ve hit the bullseye,” I admitted. “Seriously, Asterion, I’m frightened by what else my Self will do to me.”
“Aside from saving our lives, what else has it done?”
“Made me question if I’m being possessed,” I answered on a laugh I didn’t feel.
“Do you care to explain?”
I inhaled deeply. “The thing that scares me the most about the Self or Sorcha or whatever… is the thought that what’s left of the old me is still slipping away.” I breathed out, thinking I probably needed to explain what I was talking about. “Now don’t get me wrong. There’s a lot about that person I’m glad is gone. But there were a lot of good things too...” I felt my throat tighten up. Pushing past the knot in my larynx, I finished, “And I don’t want to lose those parts of me.”
Asterion put one of his big arms around my shoulders and squeezed them in a sideways hug. And I melted into him, grateful for his strength, his warmth, his kindness. There was just something so understanding about him. So kind and caring.
“Does Tallis know this?”
The mention of my Scotsman made guilt well up within me and I pulled away from Asterion. I then looked up at him and asked, “You know how much I really love him, right?”
“Beyond any reasonable doubt,” he assured me.
“But things like this... he’s not very good at understanding sometimes. Or, just listening. Tallis is a fix-it sort of person. If you tell him something, he immediately tries to find the solution. But, sometimes I just want him to listen, you know?”
Asterion nodded. “I do, but perhaps you shouldn’t assume without giving him the benefit of the doubt.”
“You don’t know Tallis like I do,” I said with a shake of my head. “If I told him everything I just told you, he’d tell me I was imagining things and to suck it up and focus on more pressing concerns. And I just… I don’t want to hear that.”
“And Bill would not be much better?”
I shrugged both shoulders, suddenly feeling uncomfortable with the conversation. “Depends. Sometimes he can say just the right thing when I need to hear it. Other times, he’s too busy trying to show off.”
“And that makes me your sole remaining option?”
“It’s not like that!” Hearing the whine in my voice, I tried again. “But, to answer your question, yes, I guess it does. You just… you understand things and you know what to say or what not to say, given the situation.”
His soft lips kissed my forehead while he wrapped his arms around me and gave me a gentle squeeze. “I’m glad to be here for you, Lily,” he reassured me. “And if I can offer you some advice?”
“Of course.”
“Change is inevitable in all things. Never to be feared, always to be embraced. It’s only when someone refuses to change that catastrophe follows.”
My mind flashed back to the stultifying bureaucracy of AE, the unchanging despotic rule of Alaire, Bill drowning out his pain with his lust and Tallis doing the same with isolation and self-loathing.
I looked up at him with genuine affection. “How did you get to be so wise?”
He gave me back a sad smile. “Continued survival requires constantly facing hard truths. There are some who would call those truths ‘wisdom’, I suppose.”
On its own, my hand reached up to his cheek and stroked it. It’s not fair—to feel this way, I thought. It’s just not fair.
“Ah, for Bran’s sake...!” Tallis called out from ahead of us.
That intrusion of reality made both Asterion and me quickly scoot apart from each other. It turned out to be good timing as Bill was running back our way.
“What’s the problem, Bill?” I asked, my eyes trying to penetrate the gloom so I could spot it myself.
“Be easier to show than tell,” my guardian angel admitted, moving his head in the direction we were still walking.
We’d gotten closer to the cabin than I realized. The plain-looking structure stood as proud and defiant as ever. I kept expecting Tallis’ pack of tamed monsters to be there to greet us. But they’d been killed a while ago. And it was strange that it struck me as sad, considering they were demons from the Underground and not exactly domesticated. But, they were just like Tallis, himself.
“What the bloody feck,” Tallis started as he glared at his home.
As I studied Tallis’s modest home, something struck me as wrong with the landscape. The grass and trees were more vibrant than the rest of the wood, like a piece of Sherwood Forest had dropped down from below. Looking at the banners with the black background and white horse in the center, I began to see why Tallis was so pissed off.
Tallis was aiming his sword at the front door, muttering to himself.
The door flew open and a young man with a thin build, hawkish face and laughing eyes came out with a flourish.
“Ah, it’s so good to see everyone once again!” Gwydion said as he clapped his hands and grinned from ear to ear.
EIGHT
TALLIS
The second I saw Gwydion, I felt me blood boil as hot as any lava. Instead of the jerkin I’d seen him in last time, he was now sporting a fine three-piece suit in black, right down to the fancy shoes. He’d have looked more at home walking the streets of Dis than slumming here in the Dark Wood.
“Where in bloody hell is Cassandra?” I snapped at him, fearing the worst. The Welshman never showed up anywhere without trouble being close on his trickster heels.
Cassandra had been house-sitting in me absence, something that was clearly no longer the case.
He gave me a dismissive chuckle and a shrug. “How should I know? That backwards-fluent prophetess has been sent elsewhere by the Muse sisters.”
I stuck me blade under his chin as I growled, “An’ that was...?”
He gave me the look of a man disappointed in his slow cousin. “Really, Tallis. We both know the likes of Polyhymnia would never deem to tell me such a thing. All I can definitely say is that I was tapped to take over Cassandra’s post.”
He glanced at me blade like it was a rare gem he’d like to filch. “I have to say that’s some remarkable restraint you’re showing, old friend. Guess those rumors about Donnchadh being out of your system are true, after all.”
“I think his restraint is going to be dependent on you being cooperative,” Besom warned him, her own hand on her blade’s hilt.
Gwydion nodded. “In which case, we should get along swimmingly.”
Then the bastard had the cheek to put a hand on me shoulder and add, “And admit it, Druid. Few folk can guard a location—or a secret—as well as I can.”
“Yeah, when you’re not backstab-blading people with a double-cross,” the angel snapped, aiming his bow right at the Welshman’s eyes. The stookie angel had neither forgotten nor forgiven the slave hunter’s ambush that Gwydion had lured us into.
Cassie’s replacement had the good sense to pull his hand off me shoulder. He turned it into a waggling finger at the stookie angel. “Tsk-tsk-tsk, I’ll have you know that what I did last time was a triple-cross, my overly sensitive guardian angel. And since everything ultimately worked out for the best, what harm was done in the end?”
“Is that the kind of line you fed Alaire before you pulled the same game on him?” me Besom asked him. I could feel the faint hum of her power surging under her skin, ready to flatten the smug little shite if he made one misstep.
“Such rampant distrust,” Gwydion sighed as he shook his head. “Mind you, I’ll be the first to say it was earned, but...”
Besom wasn’t charmed by his self-effacing act. “How do we know you didn’t pull a fast one on Cassie and you’re just here to get Alaire off your back?”
He all but threw his head up as he stretched out his arms, deftly pulling his chin away from me blade. “Oh, Lady Lily, you are giving me far too much credit.”
“Ye admit to havin’ limits?” I muttered, aiming at his neck. “There’s a first.”
He grinned at me. “There’s no shame in admitting my guile and wiles can’t get me everything. They’d hardly be a match for a prophetess trained by none other than Delphi’s patron god.” He put his hands down and gave what he thought was a sincere look. “And really, Ms. Harper, do you think for one moment that Cassandra couldn’t have called in the kind of backup that would utterly ruin my day?”
That did make sense. Cassandra had mentioned how she had some mysterious protection she could call upon if things ever got too dangerous here. Interesting that the Welshman also knew as much.
“I think you forget yourself by being too familiar,” Asterion rumbled, stepping in front of Lily. Me Besom quickly stepped around the big lummox, giving him a little look of reproach. But I couldn’t help but see the way she gave him a grin of gratitude, all the same.
“The curse of being sociable, my good sir,” Gwydion said, taking our newest companion’s presence as lightly as he took the rest of us. “I must confess I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure.”
As the now-human Minotaur opened his mouth, Gwydion waved a hand in front of him. “No, no, don’t tell me. I’d rather figure your identity out for myself.” He squinted up at the man-bull and muttered, “Strong lines... muscles that’d put Bran the Blessed to shame... and there’s something positively... primal inside you...” He pulled back and asked, “You’re not a werewolf, are you?”
“Does Kemosabe look that hairy to you, Gwydi-liar?” the angel snapped, still aiming the bow at the Welshman’s face.
Gwydion only had eyes for the man-bull while he absently waved at the stookie angel. “No, no, you’re right, little angel, stupid of me. Let’s try again...” He went back to squinting and muttered, “Dark features... I’d say Greek? Definitely not a god or demigod I’m acquainted with, though. And it doesn’t match what I saw inside... so...” He clapped his hands together and pointed. “The Minotaur!”
Me Lily looked a second away from taking the Welshman’s head for a trophy. “He prefers the name his mother gave him… Asterion.”
“Your mother being Pasiphae, unless I’m mistaken?” Gwydion deduced.
The man-bull’s expression only grew more sour as this conversation rolled on. “You are not mistaken.” He took a breath. “Who are you again, presumptuous one?”
Seeing as I knew the Welshman best, I took the time to make the introduction. “Asterion of Crete, meet Gwydion fab Don, nephew of Mag the Ancient an’ general pain in the arse.”
Gwydion gave him a deep bow. “It is a genuine honor to meet Judge Minos’ stepson. I’d heard you’d escaped that beastly Arena some time ago. Being with this fine company gives me an inkling as to how you managed it.”
“Are you mocking me, Gwydion fab Don?” the man-bull asked, his temper at full boil. I fancied I could see his muscles swell with his rage.
“Oh, positively everyone, son of Pasiphae,” the Welshman answered. “Just ask my Uncle Mag.”
He then looked around the woods behind us. “What, expecting one o’ yer many enemies to show up, Welshman?” I mocked.
“Well, I have had to worry about Alaire since our last meeting,” he admitted, eyes still on the trees behind us. “He was even less amused by my previous antics than you were, Lord of Fergus Castle.”
“Then maybe talking out here isn’t the best idea?” Lily suggested.
“Why not out here?” the stookie angel argued otherwise, lowering his bow with a shrug. “All the eyes watching this place got made blind, deaf, dumb and stupid.”
I didn’t have the heart to tell him those last two were one and the same.
“Even so, the occasional scouting party has been known to pass by,” Gwydion added with a note of caution.
The man-bull pointed at the banners. “Perhaps announcing your presence is a mistake?”
“Oh, those are strictly for you,” Gwydion answered, waving away his concern. “Once we go inside, all this pageantry will fade away like a dream.”
I gestured with me blade towards the cracked door. “Then ye’ve nae objections if I go in first?”
Gwydion stepped aside and gestured towards the doorway. “Why ever would I stand in the way of a man returning to his home after so long?”
I snarled and said over me shoulder, “Watch him.” Trusting in this one’s good intentions was a bigger gamble than using the Phonebooth had been.
Were it not for the rough hewn walls, I wouldn’t have recognized me own cabin. The floor had been completely swept and the holes in it patched. Electric candles softly glowed from wall scones, putting out a soft, but bright glow. I wondered how they were powered when I spotted a quietly running generator in the far corner to me left. Right in front of it was a desk with an open computer—laptop, I think it was called—with a blank black screen. A bed big enough to hold all of us dominated the back right corner, white sheets or soft pillows on every inch. It made me think of that strange show from America about a group that goes about fixing people’s dilapidated homes.
