The seer, p.13
The Seer, page 13
Releasing my hold on Seren, I bounded over to the bow and picked it up with my teeth. The trouble was, I couldn’t both carry it and drag her. There was hardly time to come up with a good choice, and I ended up slipping her arm through it before folding that same arm across her chest to try and hold the bow in place. Running back around behind her, I latched onto her cloak and resumed pulling.
With each step I took, my muscles quivered. The thick smoke made it almost impossible to see and the barn’s groaning grew even louder. There were more loud crashes as wood continued to crumble around us, but I forced myself to press on. We weren’t dying like this. Not if I had anything to say about it.
The first brush of cool air at my back gave me a much-needed burst of energy. I let out a growl, tugging even harder as I continued dragging Seren across the ground. A quick glance over my shoulder told me we had reached what remained of the barn’s entrance. I dug into the last bit of strength I had and with a few more strong tugs, freed us from what had almost become our fiery prison.
I continued dragging Seren, even once we were free of the flames, wanting us as far away from the building as possible before it came down. Just a few more steps, I told myself, trying to ignore my panting as I half stumbled in the charred grass. Two more strong tugs and I released my grip on her, just as the burning barn gave a loud rumble before crashing in on itself.
“Ri Seren!”
The shout made me start and I looked to my left to see Tudwal and another warrior running up. From what I could see, the fire had begun to slowly burn itself out and there were no more signs of Fianna’s creatures. I shifted, though the transformation left me feeling weak and slightly lightheaded. It drained me each time I shifted and I’d already pushed my body close to its breaking point in getting Seren out of the burning building.
“She was unconscious when I found her,” I told Tudwal as he crouched down beside me.
Tudwal felt for Seren’s pulse, his expression grim. A hacking cough tore from my lungs, leaving me doubling over as my body protested the copious amounts of smoke I’d inhaled. Tudwal released Seren’s wrist and I got my first good look at the burns covering her left hand. My stomach clenched. We’d left the healer who had traveled with us in Sionnach and we were still a full day’s ride away from Castle Clogwyn.
“We’ll get her to the village healer,” Tudwal said, getting to his feet and motioning a warrior over. “The fire is getting under control and the creatures seem to have vanished.”
“I’m coming with you,” I replied, straightening as well.
Tudwal cast me a sidelong glance. “I suppose you could use a healer yourself.”
I could only imagine what I looked like, covered in soot and ash, along with minor cuts and scrapes that I’d earned battling the shadow creatures. Bits of the creatures’ poison had leeched into my body, some of my wounds having a distinct burning sensation, but I had survived worse. Tudwal took Rhonwen’s bow before instructing a warrior to pick Seren up and carry her. Though I wanted to argue that I could carry her to wherever we were going, my growing lightheadedness made me all too aware that I wasn’t in any shape to do so. Tudwal was right: I probably did need to be seen by a healer.
Trudging along behind the warrior carrying Seren, I worked to try and take deep breaths despite the ache in my lungs. Seren was a fighter. She’d survived a direct attack from a shadow creature; she would survive this. As we passed the charred-out husks of buildings, many of them still smoldering, my thoughts shifted to Alannah. If the creatures had disappeared, then Alannah was most likely gone as well. I doubted she would have mastered Lorcan’s skill of commanding the capricious beings from afar in a few months’ time. She would have been forced to go where they went to keep control of them. At least there’s a few less for her to command now, I thought, my gaze flitting to Rhonwen’s bow, which Tudwal carried with an appropriate amount of respect and care.
Our victory was a small one. I was reminded of that as we walked the ruined streets of Traeth. There wasn’t much of the village that had been spared and all around me, I was met with desperate, frightened faces. After Lorcan and Cadfael had died, I’d hoped to never see such destruction again. It angered and disturbed me that there seemed no end to it. And that creature came far too close to leading Seren to her doom, I thought, my gaze once again falling on the unconscious form of my wife as another cough ripped from me. It gnawed at me, the things unsaid between us, how I had hurt her, just as it frightened me that she might be ready to give up on us. And yet at the same time, she’d trusted me enough to have me at her side as we’d faced Fianna’s monsters. I wouldn’t lose her. I couldn’t. Not like this.
Chapter 21
Clouded Vision
Seren
I awoke to a painful burning sensation in my left hand, a throbbing head, and an aching chest. It took my eyes a few moments to adjust to the dim darkness, the two candles on the other side of the room not offering much light. The room was both small and unfamiliar. I sat up halfway in the narrow bed, unable to suppress a groan.
There was movement to my right and a shadowed figure whirled around. It was Domhnall, which meant I wasn’t among the enemy. I remembered the fire and running into the barn after the creature, but little else.
“You’re awake,” Domhnall said, walking over to my bedside.
There was something in his tone, a hint of displeasure, and in the set of his shoulders that left me with a niggle of unease. Something had shifted between us that night on the road, and not for the better.
“The fire? The warriors and the villagers? Rhonwen’s bow?” I asked, pushing myself to sit up more despite the sharp, stinging pain in my hand. I glanced down at it, now covered in thick cream-colored bandages. Clearly, I had not come out of my fight with the shadow creature unscathed. Another mark on my body from this unending battle with Fianna, it seemed.
“The bow is in safekeeping and the fire is out,” Domhnall answered. “The injuries the warriors sustained were largely minor. Only a few of them lost their lives. Tudwal has had any available warriors helping the villagers with the damages and seeing to their dead. I can say that the welcome we’ve received here has been far better than what we received in Sionnach.”
He didn’t bother to veil the disgust in his voice when he spoke of the far northern village. I wasn’t exactly pleased with what had transpired in Sionnach, but I also found that I didn’t care for his clear disdain. The villagers of Sionnach were still my people. I still owed them my protection and care as Ri, whether they cared for me or not. And I have failed them, I thought, worrying my lower lip. The only promise I’d kept to the people of Blaidd had been outlawing the hunting of shifters, but the people were still losing their lives and their homes to Fianna’s darkness.
“Where exactly are we?” I asked, covering my mouth with my arm as I coughed and using my good hand to rub my aching chest.
“The village healer’s home. He’s been tending you since Tudwal had you brought here yesterday afternoon.”
“A full day has passed?” I grimaced; Spirits only knew what I’d missed in my unconscious state.
“Not quite. It is not yet dawn.”
“And Bran?” My chest tightened at my last memories I had of him battling one of Fianna’s creatures. He could be dead now, for all I knew.
Domhnall’s lip curled before he crossed his arms and looked away, staring intently at the room’s one hide-covered window. “You were asking for him. Almost all night.”
“He is my husband,” I said, my voice hard even as I felt my cheeks flush slightly.
Domhnall’s features twisted into a scowl. “So he is.”
“I am asking you how he has fared.”
Domhnall didn’t answer at first, his eyes cold as he stiffly rolled his shoulders.
“I am asking you as your Ri, Domhnall,” I said, narrowing my eyes.
“He’s alive,” he replied, his tone flat.
I slumped back against the pillows, letting out a breath of relief. Bran was still here, with me. No Spirit had escorted his soul from this realm to the next; not this time. Another cough erupted from my chest, making me wince. I’d clearly inhaled far too much smoke in the burning building.
“I should let the healer know you’re awake,” Domhnall said, his gaze still slightly averted.
A tense silence filled the air, almost as if he were waiting for me to say something, but I was weary. I didn’t have the energy to deal with his petulance. Muttering under his breath, he turned and let himself out of the room. As soon as he was gone, I swung my legs over the side of the bed, unsteadily getting to my feet. I needed to see to my people.
At some point, my no doubt ruined clothes had been exchanged for a clean pair I’d brought with me in my saddlebags. I didn’t see my boots anywhere, meaning I’d have to go on a hunt for them. Drawing a deep breath, I took a few steps, grumbling at how woefully unsteady I was. The throbbing headache I’d awoken with only increased with each step I took. I sighed in frustration. I didn’t have time for this.
I’d only made it a few, uneven steps away from the bed when there came a knock at the door. I started so badly, I almost tumbled over, barely managing to grab onto the back of a chair to steady myself. In doing so, I hit my injured hand and the stinging, sharp pain made me hiss. I called for my visitor to enter, only to have my words cut off by another bout of coughing.
The door creaked open, revealing an older man, laden with a bag of what looked like healing supplies and carrying a basin of water. The healer, I presumed. He frowned as he stepped into the room, closing the door behind him.
“Ri Seren,” he said. “I must insist you return to bed. I’m afraid you’re not well enough to be up yet.”
“I have things I must see to.” I shrugged him off. “I must see to the villagers, and my warriors—”
“I do not mean to downplay your importance,” the healer replied, speaking slowly as if choosing his words with care. “But Warrior Tudwal has had things well in hand. The people of Traeth are grateful for him and for your timely arrival. You have sustained considerable injury during the fighting. As a healer, I must insist that for now, you rest.”
I closed my eyes, taking in a deep breath as I tried to stifle my mounting frustration. I loathed to admit it, but he was right. I had been injured, whether I liked it or not. With a heavy sigh, I shuffled back over to the bed.
“Please tell my advisor that I wish for him and Tudwal to speak with me as soon as possible, so that I can get a better assessment of the situation,” I said, awkwardly crawling back into bed mindful of my injured hand. Spirits forbid I brush it against anything with the fiery pain that followed.
“I will make certain that message is passed on,” the healer replied.
He pulled a chair over to my bedside, rummaging around in his bag before turning his attention to my bandaged hand. I hissed again as he unwrapped it, despite the care he took. The skin underneath was red and weeping, burns covering my hand and working their way up to my wrist. My stomach tightened. I could ride one-handed, but I’d hardly be able to fight, much less draw a bow. Spirits help me if we ran into any more of Fianna’s creatures on the remainder of our journey back to Clogwyn.
“This will hurt,” the healer said before passing me a flask of what I assumed was some sort of spirits.
Nodding grimly, I took it from him and took a large swallow. Over the years, I’d assisted Cian with tending to burns enough times to know it wasn’t going to be pleasant. Pain radiated up my arm as the healer began to clean the burns and I ground my teeth, fighting to keep quiet despite the pain, but before too long, a few muttered curses in Old Pernish escaped my lips. My shoulders sagged in relief when he was finally finished. He applied a salve, the concoction blessedly soothing, before carefully wrapping my hand once more in soft linen bandages.
“You’re very lucky those burns didn’t travel farther,” he said as he tied off the last of the cloth. “It’s a good thing our Tiarna got to you when he did.”
My brow furrowed slightly, my heart lurching at the mention of Bran. “How has he fared?”
“He was not unscathed, but he has healed quickly. His injuries were minor compared to yours.” The healer started to get up but paused, clearing his throat. “It was valiant thing he did, pulling you and the bow from that barn. And it has not gone unnoticed by the people of Traeth.”
He got up and gave me a respectful nod, gathering his things before seeing himself out. It appeared I had Bran to thank for my saving life, and for keeping Rhonwen’s bow from perishing in Fianna’s flames. Had I been too harsh on him since he’d returned? Even a village healer, it seemed, could see something honorable in him, even after the long months of him being painted as a traitor to the people of Blaidd. I had been nothing but unkind to him and in return, he had selflessly risked his life for me.
Using my good hand to fidget with the corner of one of the blankets, I swallowed against the thickness in my throat as Bran’s haunting accusations from not so very long ago in the dark of the dungeons came back to me. I didn’t want to be my father. I didn’t want to let anger and bitterness poison me as it had done to him, but as I sat in the dimly lit room, it was harder to lie to myself about how little of my father’s tendencies I truly possessed. I had let my bitterness fester since Bran’s disappearance. And it had colored my actions, whether I wished to admit it or not.
I bit my lip and my chin dipped. Once again, Bran had saved my life at great peril to his own. What else did I want from him? Even if I still shied away at the thought of completely giving him my heart again, it wasn’t fair to keep treating him so poorly and pushing him away. He had admitted to his mistakes and asked for my forgiveness. Was it truly fair to him to keep denying him that? How much had I let my hurt cloud my vision and keep me from seeing things clearly?
And was this not what I wanted? I thought, an uncomfortable feeling in the pit of my stomach. The people of Blaidd learning to accept shifters. Learning to see them as people and not the monsters Father painted them as? I’d done nothing but reinforce that narrative these last few months, pushed and goaded by the council to do so while my anger had left me willing to oblige. Shame made the back of my neck heat and I was glad I was alone in the little room as I wrestled with my guilt.
Bran had made a mistake, yes, but what servant of Fianna would have saved not only me, but the clan’s only weapon against it? There was no reason for him to continue to be treated like the enemy. I needed to come to terms with my own hurt and stop lashing out at him instead. He deserved that much.
Chapter 22
A Trial of Trust
Bran
I was desperate to see Seren. Tudwal had given me news of how she fared, but it still wasn’t the same as seeing her myself. I’d had half a mind to barge into the healer’s home and demand that I be allowed to check on her, especially when I’d heard that Domhnall had already visited her twice now, but I was uncomfortably aware that even saving Seren’s life hadn’t been enough to banish the suspicion that the other warriors, even Tudwal, held for me.
It was early morning, the sun just breaking over the Dail, and like the rest of the warriors, I was readying myself for a day of helping the villagers tend to their dead and their ruined homes. The fire had spared nothing and reminders of the blaze were everywhere one looked: in blackened skeletons of buildings, soot-covered stone, and the haggard faces of the villagers.
I was seated around a fire with the other warriors, in front of the small circle of tents where we’d set up camp, within walking distance of the village square. As the others talked with one another over their breakfast, I’d been left to sit a little away from them, shoveling down the thick porridge we were having for breakfast. I’d earned myself some begrudging respect from the villagers for my efforts to save Seren, but my actions had done little to impress the warriors of Blaidd. Not that I was completely surprised. Most of them had been loyal to Cadfael and they didn’t much care for Seren or shifters.
“Bran!”
When I heard Tudwal calling me, I hurriedly shoveled down the last few bites of my porridge. He pushed his way through the huddle of warriors, making his way over to me.
“Yes?” I replied.
“Ri Seren wishes to see you.”
My heart leapt and I bolted to my feet. “She’s improved, then?”
“The healer believes she will be ready to travel again in a few days,” he answered.
I took my empty bowl back to the cook, then hurried to follow along behind Tudwal. As we left our camp to enter the village, making our way down the narrow streets to the healer’s home, my palms started to sweat. I didn’t know exactly where Seren and I stood with one another, or what my reception would be, but I was anxious to see her. I’d come too close to losing her in that burning barn.
The healer met us at the door, ushering us inside. His home was simple and carried the pungent scent of herbs, a smell I’d long ago begun to associate with Aengus. There was a twinge in my chest at the thought of my friend. There’d been no sign of him here, during or after the fire, and I’d allowed myself the small hope that maybe he hadn’t gotten tangled up in Alannah and Fianna’s tangled web of darkness after all.
“This way,” the healer said, motioning for me to follow him.
I did so, Tudwal staying behind in the slightly cramped great room. It wasn’t a far walk, no more than a few feet to the room in which Seren awaited me. The healer left me at the door and I took a deep breath before entering. She was sitting up in bed, the sunlight streaming in behind her and casting her in a soft golden glow. Her left hand was bandaged and my chest tightened at the sight of it. I’d never forget finding her in that barn, or the terrifying split second of fearing that she was dead.
