Envy, p.1
Envy, page 1
Contents
Title Page
Copyright
Keep Up With Hildred
ENVY
1
2
3
4
5
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Envy
Sins of Mercy #4
Hildred Billings
BARACHOU PRESS
Envy
Copyright: Hildred Billings
Published: August 4th, 2020
Publisher: Barachou Press
This is a work of fiction. Any and all similarities to any characters, settings, or situations are purely coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in retrieval system, copied in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise transmitted without written permission from the publisher. You must not circulate this book in any format.
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ENVY
1
The public library was where libidos went to get annihilated.
Worked for Mercy, who had things she wanted to get done on her day off. After grocery shopping, going to the bank, and picking up a package at the post office, Mercy headed to the library for some research. She took with her a tote bag full of overdue books from a year ago. The Tale of Mary’s Magical Derriere was not something the librarian wanted to scan that day, but oh well. The book sucked, anyway.
Dues paid, Mercy wandered through the stacks in search of… well, she wasn’t sure. Was what she wanted in fiction or non-fiction? Should she ask somebody? Check on the computer? Mercy did neither of these things, as she was too embarrassed to even open her mouth to say it.
Seven Deadly Sins.
She stared at an old tome on the upper shelf, high on the second floor. Mercy stood on her tiptoes, attempting to reach the dusty book, but it proved to be out of reach.
“Here. Let me help you with that.” An older gentleman dressed in khakis and a polo shirt plucked the book off the shelf and deposited it into Mercy’s hands.
“Thanks.” She blew the dust off the cover and turned away. She had shit to look up, and she didn’t need strangers in the library looking over her shoulder in the hopes of striking up a conversation. So much for the days of shushing libraries and quiet corners. Mercy knew things had changed from her childhood because Marissa incessantly complained about how “uncouth” the library had become. “So many kids running around,” she once huffed. “College students loudly discussing their ‘work,’ if you really want to call it that.” She longed for the days when someone could get their ass kicked for talking in a library, but Mercy wasn’t convinced those days ever existed.
“Hey,” the older man said, “what’s a lady like you doing reading silly stuff like that?”
Silly? Silly? Did this guy have any clue as to what he was talking about? Doubtful! Mercy furrowed her brows and sent the stranger a strong glare. He put up his hands and walked away, mumbling about “women who don’t appreciate chivalry.” She was reminded of Bill, of all the fuckups she didn’t want to think about on her damned day off.
The sunny side of the library had rows upon rows of old oak tables. A few at the end were taken up by a study group from the local law college, but the other end was free aside from another elderly man reading through a stack of magazines. Mercy picked a seat where she could sit in the sunlight and read the tome without needing her glasses.
The Seven Deadly Sins, as told through Catholicism, art, and other mythology. Mercy was not a religious woman anymore, but she had heard plenty of these fabled sins as a child. Once. A long time ago. Her family’s church would never cavort with Catholics, but occasionally the pastor went on about gluttony, wrath, covetousness and, of course, lust. No matter who told it or how, it was always the end of the world for one of God’s children to embrace the sin within them. Although Mercy was no longer religious, many of those teachings still took hold inside of her. How could sinning be a good thing?
“Let’s see what we’ve got here.” Mercy licked her fingers and flipped through crusty pages, looking at forewords and stains upon the paper. Sketches soon appeared, each one depicting a deadly sin in the form of a woman. Because they were always women. Hmph.
Mercy’s finger lingered over the image of “Lust,” depicted as a conventionally beautiful, thin woman with chestnut brown hair and large breasts. She lay on a chaise lounge, gaudy skirts spilling onto the floor and showing a hint of leg. The come-hither look in her eyes was clearly drawn by a man. Mercy sighed. This woman looked nothing like the Lust she had known.
Neither did Avarice. Nor Sloth. Avarice was a hag with fangs, sinking her teeth into a well-to-do woman and making off with a pouch of jewels. How cartoonish. Sloth was a large woman snoring on another couch. Of course, she was positioned in such a way that a perverted reader could see the insides of her thighs and plunging neckline. Mercy shut the book in disgust.
Yet she had come for a reason. That reason was to find out more about these Seven Sinners, so help her Christian God.
Vanity. Gluttony. Wrath. Envy. Each sin was depicted as a woman acting out her trait, from screaming and thrashing, to another overweight woman stuffing her face with turkey legs. Vanity preened in a mirror while applying lipstick and having some poor sod brush her long, blond hair. Envy was another vampiric cartoon of a young lady peering around the corner and watching a girl flirt with a handsome young man. A devil’s tail hung out of her dress, and horns sprouted from her head.
“Each of the Seven Deadly Sins represents the faults of mankind. They serve as a reminder to rise above them, and become a better person. The Seven Virtues act as a countermeasure.” Mercy put down the book, a plume of dust rising into the sunlight. The faults of mankind, huh? That was strange, considering her friends among the Seven Sinners worked to restore those faults into women. Like a gift.
Mercy sat back in her seat. Before she met the Sinners, life was in ruins. Depressed, suicidal, and waiting for the world to end. That was Mercy. Then, one night, as she contemplated jumping off a bridge, Acedia appeared and offered to change her life.
Whether I liked it or not, honestly.
That didn’t sound like something bad people did. Was sinning really so terrible?
Mercy flipped to the back of the book and scoured the index for Acedia’s name. She found it, but only after searching every footnote she came across in the history section.
“Acedia was one of the two additional sins later removed from the final list, as approved by the Vatican. It represented a severe listlessness, to the point of not caring about others or the world. Some people argue that it is akin to the understanding of depression during times when mental health issues were not as well comprehended. Later, it was merged with Sloth. Today, the term Acedia means to be uncaring about the world or those who inhabit it.”
What a lovely image. Mercy closed the book and slumped down in her seat.
She wouldn’t pretend that she understood spirituality or how it pertained to her life. Nor would she try to explain what was happening to her in terms of being visited by these deities who promised to “fix” her by giving back her sins meant to destroy mankind. Or something.
Mercy packed up her things and placed the book on a cart. A librarian walking by took one look at it and said, “Dear me, I haven’t seen this book in so long! I thought we had gotten rid of it. Must be terribly outdated. Sorry about that.”
Somewhere from the depths of her fatigue – a gift from Sloth, ugh – Mercy managed a smile. “It’s no problem. It told me what I needed to know.”
The librarian gave her odd look. “That so? Well, glad we could help. Do you need assistance with anything else?”
Mercy shook her head. “I’m fine, thanks.” She stole out of the library before the librarian followed her.
It was a lovely day, the kind of day Mercy would have once used to do some cleaning around her house or read at a café. That feels like so long ago now. Or at least it felt like a long damn time. Long before the Seven Sinners started showing up on her doorstep with a mission to fuck the life back into her.
Mercy yawned.
Since Sloth’s departure, Mercy was certainly a sleepier woman. No longer plagued with endless energy, Mercy now slept full nights again. Fitfully, even. She had forgotten how nice it felt to be lazy in bed and rest for the sake of it. Reminded her of when she and Marissa used to… no, she wouldn’t think of it. Thinking of Marissa only made her sad again. And lustful. And greedy of all the things Marissa took with her when she left. Mercy missed the cat most of all.
She stopped at a corner café, sitting on the terrace with her cappuccino as she watched the world go by. It almost made her smile. Strange. She hadn’t smiled over simple pleasures in so long. Not over cappuccinos, which warmed her mouth with foam and slid down her throat like silk. Not over cute baristas who made her stomach tumble. Not over clear blue skies or the laughter of friends sharing stories. The feeling, however, was fleeting. Soon enough, Mercy was back in a dark place where she didn’t know how to sin enough to stay alive.
“You’re getting there.”
Mercy hadn’t heard Acedia’s voice in a long while. She sipped her cappuccino and attempted to enjoy the sunshine.
“What do you think is still missing from your life?”
Knowing better than to start talking to herself in public, Mercy pulled out her phone and typed something into the notes app.
“Tsk.” Although the deity wasn’t physically around, Mercy could still feel Acedia’s presence, shaking her head and passing the usual judgment. “I saw you poking around the library. Learn anything good?”
You don’t need me to tell you that. I’m sure you saw what I was reading.
“Indeed. But I’m certainly curious to hear your take on it.”
Apparently, you’re good for nothing.
Acedia said nothing after that. Had Mercy struck a nerve?
Chats from Acedia could only mean one thing: another Sinner was due for a visit. Before heading home to deal with that, however, Mercy remained on that terrace with its gentle breezes and warm sunlight. A crazy deity infused with sin could wait for her. Too long since Mercy took some time for herself. Just to prove how much it was worth it, she loaded an eBook on her phone and endeavored to enjoy some classic literature.
Suffice to say, she was more chipper than usual as she walked down the street an hour later, on her way to the trains that would take her back to her neighborhood. What to have for dinner? Mercy stuck her hands in her jeans pockets and walked with a skip in her step. Maybe she should order in Chinese and spoil herself. Nah. Too oily. There was a soup and sandwich place outside her station that could be a good meal. Maybe that would work. She could scarf it down and go straight to bed. Hm, maybe a bath first. She owed herself extra pleasures that night.
A dark shadow crossed her path as she turned to take a shortcut down a barren alley.
Fear struck her. A mugger? A homeless person? Both? Mercy froze where she stood, hands still in her pockets and turtleneck choking her throat. Oh, God, she didn’t actually want to die now!
A cat jumped out from behind a dumpster and took off past Mercy. She released her pent-up breath. Well, shit!
“Mercy.”
What was once a warm day suddenly turned cold. Chills ran down Mercy’s spine as she slowly turned around at the sound of a thick, authoritative voice.
She knew who it was long before she saw her.
She knew, yet her throat still went dry and her body froze with fervor.
There, standing at the end of the alley, swathed in emerald and forest greens, was a woman. Not any woman, of course. A deity. A goddess. A woman with the power to shake Mercy’s part of the world.
As if on cue, the earth trembled beneath the slamming of Mercy’s heart against her chest. No, not now. She was having a nice day. A lovely day! Finally, she was at peace. She felt balanced. Was really now the time for one of these Sinners to bring it all to a screeching halt because they felt the need to recalibrate her once again?
Apparently. If only Mercy could gather the courage to interrogate the woman standing before her.
In a bit. In just… a little bit.
When her consciousness was her own again.
2
“Who… who are you?” Mercy held herself to a wall, attempting to hide behind the rancid dumpster. For the love of… she hoped this deity wouldn’t try to make love to her in an alley! There were some experiences Mercy never wanted to have, no matter how glamorous the media made them. “You’re one of them, aren’t you?”
“My reputation precedes me.” Deep, dark. That voice crawled into Mercy and made her knees knock together. Not from desire, but from a sense of foreboding that she should not cross this goddess. “You must be Mercy. I was sent to help you.”
Did Mercy hear a trace of an accent in this woman’s voice? Or was that the thick richness of her tenor? She did have a striking countenance, the kind that supermodels killed for and aging narcissists sacrificed virgins for. A strong jaw, toned arms, and a no-nonsense haircut that framed the length of her face. Her eyes were set deep in her visage, and her lips, pursed, were a garish pink.
None of it compared to her dress, however. The focal point to these deities was their gaudy dresses made of silk and glitter. Sometimes, Mercy thought they looked like old-fashioned prom dresses… other times, bridesmaids walked down an aisle, or someone was flirting at the local garden party. But she was afraid to think about this green goddess. With a look like that about her… Mercy shook her head. This shaking made her look at the strong shoulders and wonder what it was like to grip them. No, no! Too soon for lust to cloud her judgment! I wonder what it would be like to wear a dress like that. Like a forest growing around her, tipped in emeralds as worthy as any diamond. No, no, not the avarice, too! Next, she would want to fall asleep next to this not-so-fair maiden. In the name of sloth, of course.
Curiosity compelled her to once again ask who this woman was. Mercy wanted to know what kind of sin would be injected into her this time.
“I am Envy, of the Seven Sinners,” that rich voice hummed upon the thickening air. “I’m sure you know why I am here.”
Envy. The woman sinking her teeth into a beautiful woman. Alongside her sister Avarice, whose fangs were greater and whose skin shriveled with a lust for possessions. Mercy shook the image from her head. She had to get a hold of herself now. They were in public, for fuck’s sake! Sure, Avarice had appeared in public, too, but a sex club at night was a bit different from an alley in broad daylight!
“You’re not like the others,” Mercy said. For one, this deity was out in the sunlight. What if someone walked by and saw them? What a disaster!
“Even in the spirit world two women are not the same,” Envy declared. “I thought you were supposed to be smart.” She chuckled into the back of her hand, lifting her skirt. Although the long train this emerald gown boasted dragged through the dirt and piss and whatever of the alley, not a single thread of it became marred. How ethereal. Otherworldly. I can’t fucking take it. They will all be the genuine death of me.
“I am smart,” Mercy finally rebutted. “Excuse me, though, if I was used to meeting entities like you in my home.”
“I’m not like the others.” Did she hear herself? How could Envy give Mercy crap for making the same observation? Was she trying to gaslight the poor mortal who could barely keep up with these spiritual shenanigans? “My work requires a different type of help. Are you ready for me to give you my sin?” Envy held out her hand, skirt hanging from her arm like a cape. The way she looked at Mercy, scowling with that set jaw, did not inspire confidence to go off with this enigmatic stranger.
“What… what are you going to do to me?” Besides the sex, of course. Mercy hoped to God (any God, not particularly Christian this time) that it was not happening here! She’d shell out for a five-star hotel room before doing the deed in an alley.
Envy lowered her arm. “I will make you envious of the world. I will renew your desire for what others have and achieve. It’s not greed. My sister would have you covet things. She’s an idiot. I’ll make you see the world with an emerald hue like you have never envisioned before. All of the abstract ideas that humans covet… you will yearn for them too, soon enough. Such passion has been missing from your life, and I am charged with bringing it back.”
Mercy tried to contain a strained laugh. “Damn, you’re serious. Well, all right. Let’s go have sex. Although I kinda wish you lot would at least take me out on a date first. You know, something to be said for wooing a girl before screwing her.”
Envy’s hard expression did not change. “Date? What is a ‘date?’”
“Forget it. I was being facetious.”
A large, intimidating hand raised in Mercy’s direction. “I will take you somewhere.”
Mercy studied that hand only a few feet away from her. “Huh?” Did she dare touch that hand? It looked like it would grip her throat and choke her to death. And why was Envy so serious looking? Mercy almost preferred the drawing of the vampire sucking the life out of a helpless woman.
Envy’s fingers beckoned to Mercy. “Come, and I will show you what true envy means.”
“Like a field trip?”
Mercy looked around. A few people passed by on the street, but did not stop to look at them. “I mean, I’m sure you’re nice and everything, but you’re not exactly normal looking. People are gonna stare. And call the police. I’m just saying.”
