Rejected fae hate to lov.., p.1
Rejected Fae (Hate to Love Fae Book 1), page 1
Rejected Fae
Hate to Love Fae
J.L. Wilder
Copyright © 2022 by J.L. Wilder
All rights reserved.
No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher or author, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law.
Contents
1. Chapter 1
2. Chapter 2
3. Chapter 3
4. Chapter 4
5. Chapter 5
6. Chapter 6
7. Chapter 7
8. Chapter 8
9. Chapter 9
10. Chapter 10
11. Chapter 11
12. Chapter 12
13. Chapter 13
14. Chapter 14
15. Chapter 15
16. Chapter 16
17. Chapter 17
18. Chapter 18
19. Chapter 19
20. Chapter 20
21. Chapter 21
22. Chapter 22
23. Chapter 23
24. Chapter 24
25. Chapter 25
26. Chapter 26
27. Chapter 27
28. Chapter 28
29. Chapter 29
30. Chapter 30
31. Chapter 31
32. Chapter 32
33. Chapter 33
34. Chapter 34
35. Chapter 35
36. Chapter 36
37. Chapter 37
38. Chapter 38
39. Chapter 39
40. Chapter 40
41. Chapter 41
42. Chapter 42
43. Chapter 43
44. Chapter 44
45. Chapter 45
46. Chapter 46
47. Chapter 47
48. Chapter 48
49. Chapter 49
50. Chapter 50
51. Chapter 51
52. Chapter 52
53. Chapter 53
54. Chapter 54
55. Chapter 55
56. Chapter 56
Chapter one
ZARA
″Zara?″
I step forward, pushing off the wall I′ve been leaning against. ″Yeah.”
″You can come in now,” the man says. He’s large and bulky, and I can only imagine how giant he would be in his monster form.
I follow him through the door and into the room where the others from the monster gang are waiting. It’s hard to say where the power really lies in this situation. My fae nature makes me a danger to them. I know that, and I know that if they knew what I really was, they wouldn’t be bringing me anywhere near this inner sanctum. They would probably be trying to kill me instead. It’s not that fae are a physical threat to the monsters, we have no interest in drinking their blood, but they view us as competition and don’t trust our magic. Monster gangs like to have total control of the city they are operating in.
Fortunately for me, they think I′m just another wolf shifter.
The only things that would give away my true nature are my ears—ever so slightly pointier than a pure shifter’s—and the bright shimmer of my eyes that never quite goes away, no matter how long it’s been since the last time I tasted blood. And it’s a simple enough glamour to cover those things.
Unfortunately for me, that puts the power very much in their hands. I can′t access much more of my magic without giving myself away, and these monsters are much, much stronger than I am.
The thought of their bestial form makes me shudder. I’ve seen monsters in that form before—the green skin and red eyes and grotesquely large muscles—and I don’t need to see it again.
Even in their human form, they′re not much to look at. I walk into the interview room and stand before the table, facing them, feeling like I′m on trial—which I kind of am. They′re beefy and burly to a man, their hair tangled and unkempt, and when they show their teeth, I can see that they are uneven and that some are missing.
I swallow hard.
Maybe this wasn′t such a good idea.
″Zara, my name is Brock,” says the man in the middle of the table. He′s shirtless, and his biceps are probably as big as my head. I have a weird mental picture of him putting my skull under his arm and crushing it like a walnut. ″Why don′t you tell us what brings you here today.”
″I heard there was work,” I say. I′m doing my best not to stammer or betray any nerves at all. I want them to think I′ve done this sort of thing a thousand times before. If they know I′m nervous, they won′t hire me, and I really fucking need this job.
They glance at each other. ″You look young,” Brock says. ″Where′d you hear about this job?”
″Over drinks.″
″At a bar, huh?”
I incline my head.
″What we need is a tracker,” Brock says. ″Someone who can follow a scent. Can you do that?”
″Of course I can.” I let some irritation creep into my voice. ″I′m a wolf.”
They look at each other again.
″Let her try it,” one of them says. ″What harm can it do?”
Brock shrugs. ″Okay, why not,” he says. ″We′ll try it.”
He pulls out a stopwatch. ″There′s a scrap of cloth hidden somewhere in this room,” he says. ″The scent you′re looking for is gunpowder. Let′s see how quickly you can find it.” He holds up the watch. ″Go.″
The job′s almost too easy. With my fae side suppressed, my wolf is aching to leap to my defense, so shifting is easier than it′s ever been. The hardest part is convincing myself to pull off my dress first—I don′t love the idea of being naked in front of these guys. But I need this job, so it′s got to be done.
And as the wolf rises, my perception of this room changes slightly.
Everything is different. It′s louder—I can hear the hum of an insect caught inside. I can see more clearly, even though the room is unlit and the only lighting comes from a high window on the wall. And the scents—
Monster.
The smell of monster is what dominates the room. They′re pungent, like men who need to wash dialed up to eleven. I do my best to keep my nose from wrinkling at the scent of them. I force myself to relax and inhale.
Gunpowder.
I smell it right away, and it′s the work of a moment to follow the scent to a loose brick in the wall. I resume my human form, pry the brick loose with my fingers, and pull out the scrap of cloth.
″Damn,” one of the men says. ″That′s faster than anybody′s done it yet.”
I toss the cloth at Brock and return to my dress, tugging it on quickly.
Brock sizes me up. To his credit, I don′t have the feeling he′s checking out my body or anything invasive like that. He′s just considering me as a candidate for the job.
″All right,” he says. ″You′re hired.”
″Thank you.” Inside, I′m jumping for joy, but I can′t let them see that I ever doubted it. ″I won′t let you down.”
″Damn right you won′t,” Brock agrees. ″We′re trusting you with this, so we expect you to get it right. If you fuck it up, there′ll be a price to pay.”
″I won′t fuck it up.”
″You’d better not. We’ve been trying to get the better of this rival gang for months now. If they discover we’ve hired shifters to help us get the upper hand on them, they’ll come for revenge—and you would pay for that in blood.”
Tough guy posturing. I try not to let any nervousness show on my face.
″Someone go and get the guys,” Brock says.
The guys?
One of the monsters goes to the door again and opens it.
Three more men come in.
One of them is dark-haired and short—still about a foot taller than me, but short compared to the others. He′s thickset and barrel-chested, and he looks like the only person in this room who could hold his own in a fight against Brock.
Behind him is a lean and tall one, with the kind of muscles that come from running. He has sandy blond hair tied back with a leather cord, and his gaze darts about the room as if he′s looking for something—-or guarding against something.
The last man to enter is the tallest of them all. His hair is orangeish-red and stands up in spikes, and something about the way he′s holding himself makes me think he′s about to throw something or maybe attack someone.
The short, dark man looks at Brock. ″Is this her?”
″Yes,” Brock says. ″Introduce yourselves.”
The dark man nods. ″I′m Art,″ he says. ”Nice to meet you. These are my brothers, Chan—” The light-haired man lifts a hand in greeting— “and Elliot.” The red-haired one inclines his head.
″I′m Zara,” I say, thinking, damn, genetics was good to these guys. Maybe it′s just the fact that I′m in a room with a bunch of monsters, but right now, I′m feeling like these three are the hottest men I′ve ever seen. I sniff the air. I’m pretty sure they’re shifters.
Play it cool, Zara. You′re here to do a job, not get laid.
And if any of these men knew my true nature, they′d either run away screaming or try to kill me. So it′s not like I can get close.
″The first stage of the job begins in the morning,” Brock says. ″Seven a.m. sharp. Be early, if you know what′s good for you.”
Art nods. I get the feeling he′s the leader of this little group. ″We′ll be here,” he says.
″So will I,” I say. I wouldn′t be late for the world.
I′ve been given a chance, and I′m not going to fuck it up.
This job could change everything for me. I just need to get through the next few days with no mistakes.
I can do that.
No problem.
Chapter two
ZARA
I′m renting a studio apartment from a human landlord. It′s fine. I′ve gotten used to hiding what I really am over the past few months. Hiding the wolf away isn′t really that much more difficult than hiding my fae side.
It would be even easier if I had grown up knowing how to control the wolf, learning about it the way most shifters do. But you can′t have everything.
Because I need to be up so early, I make myself a cup of tea and go right to bed. I′m a little worried I′ll have trouble sleeping, but the darkness steals over me quickly, as it always does, and I find myself falling into a familiar dream…
I′m in the nest under the willow tree that Leo and I once shared. His hands are on my body—we will spend all day like this, touching, caressing, making love slowly. We aren′t in any hurry. There′s no work to be done today. It′s the eve of one of our blood festivals and everyone is celebrating.
He says something—in my dreams, I never remember his words, because the words don′t matter. What matters is the feeling as he kisses along the line of my jaw, his strong, sure hand spreading my legs, his thick fingers starting to move inside me. What matters is the feeling that my body is his now, and the sure knowledge that we belong to one another.
I think he tells me I′m beautiful.
I know I feel lit up from within. I feel magical. I feel powerful.
And then…
I know it′s going to happen before it does, because I′ve had this dream so many times. Still, I try to shy away from it. I close my eyes. I try not to hear what′s going on around me. I try to lose myself in my lover′s touch.
I can′t do it.
The heat and flame tear through the sky, and someone yells, dragon! Leo is on his feet. He′s pushing me away.
Something—something strange and defensive and powerful—rises up in me.
My body changes in strange, frightening ways. I feel my bones shift, grinding against one another. For a moment, it′s outright agony, and the pain is so dominant that I can′t even focus on what else is going on.
Then I look around.
I′m lower to the ground than I normally am.
I open my mouth to say something—to ask what′s going on—and the shape of my tongue is strange and different, and I can′t manage it.
And Leo is standing over me, looking at me with revulsion on his face, as if he′s never seen me before.
I can hear the sounds of the others fighting the dragon, getting it under control. I know what′s going to happen because it′s what always happens when a shifter wanders into our encampment. They′ll take it prisoner, and tonight is the blood ceremony. Tonight we′ll take the blood of the dragon. Tomorrow, we′ll all possess its strengths.
Except that Leo is looking at me the way he looks at enemies. I′ve seen that expression on his face before, and it terrifies me.
″You′re a shifter,” he says.
Even now, in my dreams, I remember those words. I remember the disgusted tone of his voice. My memory has erased all the sweet things he used to say to me when we made love, but this I had to keep.
I want to argue, to tell him that of course I′m not a shifter. But I can′t find words. My mouth can′t remember how to say words.
″You′ve been lying to us all this time.” He sounds horrified. ″I ought to kill you right now.”
I haven′t been lying. I don′t know what′s happening, but it′s some kind of trick, some kind of trap. I haven′t been a shifter. I′m not one.
I can′t be.
Even in the dream, knowing what happens next, knowing the truth of what I am, it feels impossible.
I can′t be this.
He′s moving toward me. ″You should have known better than to try to infiltrate our encampment,” he says. ″I reject you, Zara. You deserve what happens to you now. The blood ceremony is tomorrow, and you′ll give the whole host the power of the wolf.”
He′s talking about drinking my blood.
He lunges at me and, reflexively, I dart backward.
And I realize my new strength.
I′ve tasted wolf blood before. I′ve been granted their superior speed and stealth and senses. But I′ve never been in a wolf body before. I′ve never felt my muscles react this quickly and powerfully.
I know, in an instant, that I can outrun Leo.
And I know the next moment that I′m going to have to.
He will kill me if I don′t get away from here. He′ll take my blood and share it among the hosts and they′ll all have the strength that′s rightfully mine.
I′ve just discovered this wolf, but already I′m possessive of it.
And I′m running through the woods, and the twigs are lashing at my face—but I mind it so much less than I ever have before because this body is strong and fierce and born to not give a damn.
Leo calls out my name, and I don′t care.
I′m shocked. I′m horrified. But I′m free.
I wake up panting, feeling half-animal, staring up at the ceiling overhead.
I′m safe. I remind myself of this over and over. I′m safe. Leo and the others might still be hunting for me—they′re almost certainly still hunting for me—but they won′t find me here.
They′ll assume I went to Shifter Town. Everyone knows that Shifter Town is where rejects go. It′s a home for shifters without a home. It′s the perfect place for someone like me, in theory.
Except that it isn′t. At all.
Because I′m still part fae, and the shifters would kill me just as surely as the fae would.
Sometimes I wonder who my father could have been, and what could have led him to involve himself with my mother. A wolf with a fae woman…it seems impossible. How did they not kill each other?
Maybe she did kill him. I can′t exactly rule it out.
I sigh and get to my feet. It′s still dark outside, but the sky is pale, and I know the sun′s about to rise. If I don′t want to spend the rest of my life hiding in the human world, I′d better go out there and get this job done. It′s the only way I′ll be able to secure a future for myself.
Chapter three
ZARA
″All we have to do today is find the rival gang of monsters,” Art says. ″If everything goes right, there won′t be any fighting.”
″I didn′t sign up for fighting,” I say. It′s not my strong suit. ″I thought they just needed a tracker.”
″That′s all we′re going to use you for,” Art says. ″Chan and Elliot and I will handle the fighting.”
″You′re all wolves, right?” From their scent and energy, I was almost sure these guys were shifters. There’s no way in hell they’re monsters. There′s nothing monstrous or repellent about their appearance, and I′ve always been utterly turned off by monsters. Monster blood has always been the one thing I won′t touch because it′s grotesque. It’s been tried in the past, of course—you’d be a fool not to try anything that might make you stronger. But monster blood reacts terribly with our fae makeup.
There is nothing grotesque about these three. I′m not saying I′m planning to drink their blood and confirm their worst ideas about fae. But I am saying they′re definitely attractive to me.
″Chan is a wolf,” Art says.
Chan shows his teeth. I can′t tell if he′s being playful or threatening me. ″At your service,” he says, tossing his sandy hair.
″But not all of you?” I frown. ″I thought you were brothers.”
″Half-brothers,” Art says. ″We have different fathers. The same mother.”
″I see,” I say.
″Is that not how things worked in your pack? Different men having children with the same woman?”
Because he just assumes I grew up in a pack. And I can′t let on any different. I need him to believe that I was, in fact, a part of a pack.
″No, yeah, that′s how it was,” I say quickly. ″I just didn′t realize. When you said brothers, I thought you meant full brothers.”
″We don′t look much alike for full brothers,” Elliot says, laughing a little.
″Well, I wasn′t going to question you,” I say. I′m feeling a little uneasy because it seems like they′ve decided my behavior is weird, and if they question it too much, truths I don′t want told are bound to start coming out.
