P s you would be so luck.., p.10
P.S. You Would Be So Lucky, page 10
He shook his head. "Then I dated a girl who was in America from Japan, studying English. And then I dated this girl from Lebanon, and I dated—”
"Okay, okay. I get it," I said. "You're an equal opportunity dater."
"Yeah, I am. I think you do yourself a disservice if you narrow your dating choices based upon the person's race. I actually don't think that makes much of a difference," he said. "I like who I like. If she's hot, I want to bang her."
"Wow, so romantic, Brad," I said, shaking my head.
"What about you? Have you dated men of all races?"
I stared at him for a few seconds and nodded. "Yeah, actually, I guess I would consider myself an equal opportunity dater as well. It's more about how they treat me, and if I find them attractive, of course."
"Nothing to do with their wallet size," he said, and then he started laughing. "Don't kill me. Don't kill me, Shantal. It was only a joke."
"That wasn't very funny," I said, rolling my eyes.
"I know. You have to forgive me. I have the sense of humor of a thirteen-year-old."
"Yes, you do,” I said. "So, where are we going?" I asked after I realized we were walking what seemed to be pretty much aimlessly.
"I don't know. I was enjoying the conversation so much that I wasn't paying attention to where we were going."
I stopped then and stared at him. He stopped too and looked at me with a puzzled expression on his face.
"Uh-oh, did I say something wrong?"
"No," I said. "That might be the nicest thing you've ever said to me."
"What? That I wasn't keeping track of where we're going."
"Yeah, because this conversation has just been us getting to know each other. This hasn't been us teasing each other or flirting or rushing to get to a bedroom so that we can have—”
"Hot sex," he finished the sentence for me, and I just rolled my eyes.
"It's been nice talking with you. You're not all bad, I suppose."
"I'm really not," he said.
"You shared something with me, so I will share something with you," he said softly.
"Oh, what's that?"
"The reason I'm in therapy and the reason, I guess, I am the way that I am."
"Oh, do tell."
"So I think I told you that I lived in a car with my mom for a year?"
"Yeah, I said, nodding. "That must have been really traumatic."
"It wasn't so bad at first. I didn't really realize what was going on. The harder part came when I went to school."
"Oh, I'm sorry."
"It's okay. My mom was like your parents. She wanted me to be in the best school district, so we would park in affluent areas. I don't know how she did it, but she got me into this really rich exclusive school. I guess they found out that we didn't really live there, and that I was poor, and I was teased mercilessly and made fun of for it. It just stuck, you know? That I wasn't good enough, or man enough, or... You know…" He shrugged and looked away.
"Oh, I'm sorry." I rubbed his shoulder. "That must have been really hard."
"It's weird because it was such a long time ago, and you would think it wouldn't affect me now. I'm a grown man. I'm successful. I'm rich. I'm handsome. I have whatever I want. Yet sometimes, when I'm just going about my day, I can remember the taunts and not being good enough, and not being able to change anything, being helpless, you know?"
"But you were just a kid, Brad."
"Yeah, I was a kid, but that was my mom. Do you know what it's like to sit in the back seat, watching your mom sob for hours in the front seat as she begs people for twenty dollars so she could buy me dinner?” His voice choked up. "It was hard."
"It sounds like a difficult time in your life."
"Yeah," he said. "But you know what? I'm past that, and you are past your high school days, and we're here, so let's enjoy the moment."
"Is this my cue to start rubbing your cock and kissing you?" I said with a small smile, trying to lighten the mood.
"If you would, please." He returned a small smile.
"I guess I can." I stepped forward and grabbed his head and kissed him hard, pressing my body against his. I murmured against his lips as his hand found my ass and squeezed, then brought me closer to him so that I could feel his hardness against my stomach. He ran his fingers through my hair, then pulled my face back and looked down into my eyes for a couple of seconds, not speaking. We just stared into each other's eyes for what felt like an eternity until I felt him kissing me again. I ran my hands up and down his shoulders, down his back.
Tonight was going to be hot. Tonight was going to be amazing. But I had to make sure that tonight was the last night. Every time I got to know Brad just a little bit better, I could feel that I was falling for him. I could feel that it was becoming too real, and I could not allow this man to break my heart into a million pieces.
Chapter Eighteen
Brad: How did you sleep?
Shantal: Why are you messaging me? Did you already forget the rules?
Brad: This morning, you didn’t seem to care about the rules...
Shantal: ????
Brad: Morning sex seemed like a bonus.
Shantal: Really, Brad?
Brad: It was more like, oh yes, Brad...harder, harder, give it to me harder.
Shantal: I didn’t say that.
Brad: I know...you screamed it. Ooooh Brad...AWWWW. Harder.
Shantal: Brad!
Brad: Are you blushing?
Shantal: Nope!
Brad: So I see you pulled the old leave it behind so I can see him again trick...
Shantal: What are you talking about?
Brad: You left your purse at my apartment. I guess you want to see me or my big D again soon.
Shantal: Oh, shit! I left my purse.
Brad: Hoping for a repeat and VIP tickets to a game, huh?
Shantal: LOL...in your dreams.
Brad: I guess it’s not every night, you get to be with The Brad Chambers.
Shantal: Gag me with a knife. You are full of it.
Brad: I want to see you again too.
Shantal: All I want is my purse. You can drop it off at my job.
Brad: I’ll send you my email, and we can set up a real date. I know you wanna see my baby blues again one more time.
Shantal: UGH...you’re too much.
I wrote down his email address and turned off my phone. I couldn’t believe how obnoxious Brad was, and I also couldn’t believe I had left my purse there. What a rookie mistake to make. I quickly opened my email account and sent Brad an email, so he would know I wasn’t interested in any way, shape, or form.
Dear Hotter than Hades Wannabe,
Let me fill you in on a secret. Football players do not run the world and they certainly do not get to run mine. To be honest, I don’t even know the difference between a quarterback and a tight end. Well, that’s a bit of a lie. I love me a good tight end...but do not distract me. You can bat your big blue eyes at me any day of the week, and I will feel nothing. You’re not God’s gift to women, no matter what your mama told you. Yes, we had one night together. And no, I didn’t know you were "The Brad Chambers.” Like I said, I don’t follow football. I didn’t leave my purse in your apartment because I was trying to ensure you would call me again. I couldn’t care less. And no, I don’t want a repeat performance of that night. It wasn’t that memorable. I hope this will get you to stop emailing me now. And no need to send me VIP tickets. Not interested.
Sincerely,
The Hottest Three-Night Stand You Will Ever Have
P.S. You would be so lucky to get another night with me!
I hit send and sat back with a confident smile. Take that, Brad!
Shantal,
Let me take you to dinner tonight. Come by my gym around 6pm. I’ll give you your purse and let you see me again one more time.
Growing hard just thinking of tonight,
Sexier than the other famous Brads
I read his response and groaned. What a jackass! But it was true. Brad Chambers was hotter and sexier than any other Brad I’d heard of. However, I needed to remember that I was looking for a long-term love, not a short-term good time. No matter how attractive Brad made the proposition of casual fun.
Chapter Nineteen
"Mayday, mayday," I sent in all caps as a text message to my friends.
"What's going on?" Susie responded immediately.
"Meet me in the break room in five minutes," I said, in all caps, and then put my phone in my pocket and jumped up. I didn't care that the phones were ringing. I didn't care if I got fired. I was totally and utterly out of my league right now. I couldn't believe I'd left my purse at Brad's apartment. And now I had to see him again, and I was falling for him.
The previous evening had been magical—waking up to him staring at me, the way he'd played with my hair, the way he'd kissed me, and then how he'd made me breakfast in bed, and then we'd made love in the shower. It had really put me in my feelings, and I liked him as more than a one- or two- or three-night stand. He had been vulnerable with me. The things he'd shared with me, the things I'd shared with him, things I had not spoken about to anyone other than my best friend.
I hurried to the break room and waited for Susie, Lilian, and Marcia to enter. I needed their advice, and I needed one of them to go with me to the gym to pick up the purse because I didn't trust myself to be alone with Brad.
I didn't trust that he wouldn't try to make another move, and I wouldn't be able to stop myself from succumbing. I could not sleep with this man again. I already felt like we had some sort of soul tie. I already felt like he was someone special. And I didn't want to think that I didn't want to feel that. I couldn't allow myself to be drawn into him because I knew all that was waiting for me was heartbreak. This was a man who still had demons. This was a man who still had pain and hurt. I could see it in the way he'd spoken about his mom. I could feel it in the way he'd described her crying. He was still hurting. And even though he'd made it, and even though he was successful, he was not past that trauma.
And I knew from experience that when someone was still dealing with trauma, they couldn't give themselves to you. That was probably why he wasn’t looking for a relationship and why he went from woman to woman. He had this exterior shell that was cocky and slightly obnoxious because that was his way of protecting and guarding himself. That was his way of stopping people from getting too close. And even though I knew that, I also knew I couldn't fix him. I couldn't break down that wall. He had to be ready to do that himself, and I wasn't in a place emotionally to walk down that path with him.
I wasn't in a place emotionally to be on the side waiting for him to have that come-to moment. I'd done that in my past and I'd been horribly, horribly broken, hoping a man would change, hoping that I could heal a broken heart. What I'd learned in all my years is that no human could fix another human. It could help, but it wasn't until that person was ready. It wasn't until that person was open to letting go of the hurt and forgiving and accepting that they could truly move on.
"Hey girl, what's going on?" Marcia said as she walked into the break room.
"Hey," I offered her a slightly depressed smile.
"Oh no. What happened with you and Brad?"
"Nothing," I said. I jumped up and walked over to the coffee pot. "I think I need something to drink."
"I'll have one as well," she said.
"Hey, what's going on?" Susie entered the room, followed quickly by Lilian.
"Guys"—I sighed—"I'm in over my head."
"Oh, no. What happened?" Lilian asked as she walked over to me and rubbed my back.
"So, Brad is really not a bad guy."
"Oh, boy," Susie said, "you're in love."
"I mean, I wouldn't go that far, but I have feelings, and he's not as shallow as I thought. And I know, I know they all are, but he really is. He had a really hard childhood. And I think he's so obnoxious and cocky because he's got this front, but I know I can't fix him."
"So then you can see him again," Marcia said softly. "I know that's probably not what you want to hear, but—"
"No, girl, that's exactly what I need to hear," I said, taking a sip of the black coffee and grimacing. "But I fucked up."
"Oh, shit. What did you do?" Lilian said, worried.
"I left my purse at his apartment. I don't know how or why, but he messaged me, and he wants me to come and pick it up at the gym."
"The gym?" Marcia raised an eyebrow. "That's a bit weird."
"I guess he's working out or something, I don't know. But I want one of you to come with me please because I don't trust myself to be alone with him."
"Oh shit, I've got plans with Finn today," Marcia said, "and I don't know that he'd be happy if—"
"I can go," Susie said with a small smile. "Brody has gone to California for the week, so I'm free as a bird."
"Thank you, girl."
"No worries. Plus, I would hope that you would do the same for me if the role was reversed."
"You know I would."
"I know," she said. "So what time are we going?"
"I think he said around six."
"Okay. So we're just going to go there and get the purse and leave?"
"That's the plan."
"Okay, sounds good. And if he tries to corner you?"
"He won't corner me," I said. "Stay by my side."
"Okay. And if you tell me you're going to join him for dinner or a drink?"
I glare at her. "I'm not going to do that."
"But let's just say you do. Am I to stay by your side then as well, or am I to get the hint and leave?"
"I'm not going to go have a drink or out to dinner with him."
"But let's just say that he convinces you with his sexy smile or his alluring blue eyes. What do I do?"
"You stay with me," I said.
Lilian shook her head. "Nah, girl, you go."
"Lilian."
"What? I'm just saying. If after all this you still want to go and get a drink with this dude, then she has to go, and you have to see where it takes you."
"But it's not taking me anywhere good."
Lilian grabbed my shoulders and stared me in the eyes, "Girl, not a one of us thought that our guys would be the one. All of our guys had issues. None of our guys wanted to commit. All of our guys were players. Yet here we are—three engaged women. We are here as proof that men can change when they meet the right woman."
"Yeah, but you guys are lucky. I just don't have that luck. I just meet the losers that aren't ready to change."
"Hey, girl," Marcia said, shaking her head, "don't be so down on yourself. You never know."
"I do know my entire life has just been one bastard after the other. Why would I think that would change now?"
"Because maybe now it's the right guy," Susie said softly.
"Maybe," I said. "He's really sweet. He made me breakfast this morning, oatmeal"—I laughed—"with raisins and cinnamon and brown sugar."
"Oatmeal?" Lilian wrinkled her nose.
"I mean, I know it's not pancakes," I said with a giggle, "but it's the thought that counts, and it was very delicious. He even put coconut chips in it."
"I guess it's because he's a football player," Marcia said, "I guess oatmeal's healthy or something."
"I guess," I said, thinking back to the morning and the way he'd kissed me right before I'd left. "I'm really falling for him, you know? But I don't want him to know." I let out a deep sigh. "I don't want him to think that he could just have his wicked way with me and do whatever he wants, and it's going to be okay."
"Well, he has had his wicked way with you," Susie said, laughing.
"Not one, not two," Marcia added.
"But three times," Lilian ended, and they all started laughing.
"It's not funny, guys. It's really not. I was only supposed to have one night with him, and now it's been three. And three nights with him make me want more. Oh, how do I get myself into these situations?"
"You got dick whipped," Lilian said.
And I growled, "I totally did get dick whipped. How did I let myself get dick whipped when I told myself I wasn't going to let myself get dick whipped?"
"It was because the dick was that good," Marcia said, grinning. "Sometimes, those dicks be doing it to you like that."
"Ugh," I groaned, "but I should get back downstairs because I'm sure Gloria must be already looking for me. And you know, I don't want to give her any more excuses to fire me." I looked over at Marcia. "Please, don't tell me that you'll ensure Finn doesn't fire me. There's only so many times you can tell him to give me a second chance."
"Girl," Marcia said, "Finn is my man. I can tell him a million times, and that dude will not fire you. Because you know what? If he does, he will not get any of this pussy for years." We all started laughing then.
"You're a good friend. Actually, all of you are. I love you guys. I was thinking about this the other day, but I'm so lucky to have you all in my life."
"I think we're all really lucky," Lilian said. "We've got a really special friendship."
"Yeah," Susie said, "we are the four queens of Winchester Enterprises."
"Yes, we are," I said, "and now this queen better get her ass back down to the receptionist desk. I'll see you guys later? Bye, girls." I waved at them and then exited, feeling slightly happier than I had when I'd stopped emailing with Brad. I was in over my head, and now I wasn't sure what to do because Lilian was right. They had all dated guys that had been players, maybe even worse players than Brad was, but they'd all changed. They'd all fallen in love. But I had to remind myself that happily ever after didn't come to everyone, and every bad guy didn't turn out to be a prince. Sometimes, bad guys were just bad guys. And while I didn't think Brad was a bad guy, per se, I didn't know if he was going to be the hero of my story or not. I quickly sat down in my seat as the phone started ringing. "Thank you for calling Winchester Enterprises. This is Shantal speaking. How may I direct your call?"
Chapter Twenty
"So I'm going to text him that we're here," I said to Susie as we stood outside the gym.
