Three souls, p.8
Three Souls, page 8
“Well, I’ll stay here with you until she comes back.”
I smoothed her hair and straightened her tunic before she dashed away to rejoin the game. Then I settled in a chair to watch the unruly youngsters and wait for the delinquent Nanny Wong.
When I returned to the wedding, everyone’s eyes were on the actress Li Minghui. She was Liu Tienzhen’s favourite film star, we’d been told, and had been hired to sing at the wedding. Sueyin and Tienzhen were seated at a table beside the dais, which now served as a stage where Li Minghui was performing a huangmei diao from a traditional folk opera, accompanied by a two-stringed erhu. Tienzhen was holding Sueyin’s hand and smiling with delight, his head swaying in time to the song. Gaoyin was at the same table.
“Where is Stepmother?” I whispered to her.
“At that table by the window. Why?” Then she saw my distress and followed me.
A few minutes later, we were all together, Stepmother sitting in a curved armchair of elm wood, while Gaoyin sank into a loveseat. We were in the dressing room where we had helped Sueyin adjust her heavy bridal clothing just hours ago.
I took a deep breath before speaking. “I have to tell you something, Stepmother. It’s about Second Brother’s friend, that Cha Zhiming.”
“The young man who was so kind to Fei-Fei?”
“I went for a walk by the lake, to . . . to look in on the children. I overheard a man in the pavilion trying to seduce someone. It was Cha Zhiming.”
Gaoyin yawned. “So you overheard a young man trying to steal a kiss.”
“But he wasn’t trying to seduce a woman. It was our Fei-Fei.”
Gaoyin’s eyes snapped wide open.
Stepmother stood up with a gasp. “What did he do to her?”
I shook my head. “I don’t know, Stepmother. I don’t think he had time to do much because she skipped out of the pavilion. You know how quickly Fei-Fei gets bored.”
“Where was Nanny Wong?” Gaoyin asked, her expression grim.
“Scrounging for food in the Lius’ kitchens. You can be sure I gave her a good speech when she returned. Enough to send her into tears.”
I knelt beside Stepmother, who had sunk back down into the chair, and tried to reassure her.
“I’m sure he didn’t do anything to Fei-Fei. When I found her in the children’s dining hall, she looked fine. She just wanted to get back to playing with the others. I’m sure she didn’t understand what was happening.”
“Did Cha Zhiming see you, Third Sister?”
“No. When he came out, I hid behind a shrub. That’s when I saw it was him.” I tugged at Stepmother’s hand. “We must tell Father. He would forbid Cha from ever coming to our home.”
But she shook her head slowly.
“General Cha is a very powerful man,” Stepmother said. “Powerful and vindictive, they say. We must not be perceived as hostile to him, or even let on we’re privy to knowledge that might shame him—such as his son’s despicable cravings. These are dangerous times and families are being ruined over lesser slights.”
I had no idea Stepmother knew anything about General Cha or the political climate of the country. She never said anything when my father and brothers aired their opinions.
“You’re right, Stepmother,” Gaoyin said. “It would be easy to bring this family down now that Tongyin has fallen in with Yen Hanchin. Just a few rumours planted here and there.”
“I think we’re safe, thanks to your father’s stature in this city,” Stepmother said. “And now we also have the Liu family as in-laws. But in the future, who knows? The longer this civil war drags on, the more obsessed our Nationalist government grows about traitors. They see Communist spies behind every tree.”
“But surely no one takes Tongyin seriously,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Everyone knows he is lazy and without ambition. How could he be a threat?”
“Your brother lacks convictions of his own,” Stepmother said. “So he embraces those of others with great fervour but without true understanding. That sort of fervour can be manipulated.”
“He admires Yen Hanchin. Nothing more.”
Stepmother looked at me as if to say something, then stopped. “Thank you for the warning, Leiyin. Please don’t say anything to your father. You know how he is when he gets angry. He’d react impulsively, unwisely. This is a situation we women must handle delicately, from the inner courtyard.”
“But, Stepmother—”
“Please, Third Stepdaughter. Fei-Fei is my daughter. Let me be the one to make this decision.”
“I will abide by your decision, Stepmother,” Gaoyin said, standing up to rejoin the party. “Leiyin, so will you.”
5
Between my concern about Fei-Fei and giddy memories of my time alone with Hanchin, it was nearly dawn by the time I fell asleep. Even though the dining room gong sounded an hour later than usual, I was late for breakfast, dawdling as I dressed and staring dreamily into the mirror. Would anyone be able to tell I was now a woman? That I knew how it felt to be embraced, to have my face caressed and kissed? It seemed as though bliss, and not blood, travelled through my veins.
Changyin and Shen were downing huge bowls of congee as though they hadn’t eaten a fourteen-course banquet the night before. Since so many of the wedding preparations and activities were under Gaoyin’s supervision, Shen and Gaoyin had received permission from his parents to stay with us on this visit instead of at his family’s estate.
Stepmother and Gaoyin were at the second table. There were no children in sight.
“The children are still overexcited. They hardly slept at all,” Stepmother answered when I asked after them.
Gaoyin greeted me with a nod from over her plate of toast and jam. I sat beside Stepmother and chewed on a corner of cold toast. Tongyin wandered in, hair dishevelled and eyes half open. He sat beside Shen at the other table, his back to me.
“The Liu family spared no expense,” Shen said. “Judge Liu told me Li Minghui and her staff travelled first class on the train from Shanghai.”
“She was very charming.” Gaoyin stifled a yawn. “Li Minghui told Tienzhen that Sueyin was more beautiful than all the leading ladies of Chinese cinema put together.”
“Tienzhen told me he admires Father’s literary salons,” Changyin said. “He wants to hold salons too, but for the film industry. To encourage young actors and actresses.”
Tongyin finally came to life after his third cup of tea. “Can you imagine calling a gathering of film actors a salon? Fortunately Hanchin said something very tactful. He suggested calling the events soirees instead.”
“So Yen Hanchin is a friend of the Liu family?” Father asked.
“They’re related, Father. Distantly, but of course the Lius are honoured to have a well-known poet and scholar in their family circle.”
I could have thrown my arms around Tongyin.
My brother spoke again. “There might be another betrothal in our family soon. Yes, very soon, possibly.” Tongyin sat up to assess the impact of his statement, his expression smug.
Had Hanchin confessed his feelings for me to Tongyin? It was too soon, Father wasn’t ready yet to accept a poor poet into the family. I held my breath, the knot in my stomach struggling against the flutter of hope in my heart.
Father slapped his knee. “Tell me more, Second Son. Weddings beget weddings, they say.”
“Father, yes. You’re correct. I had a conversation last night with Cha Zhiming. You know his father is General Cha.”
The knot was winning now. Had Cha Zhiming made a bid for my hand?
“General Cha?” Father sounded pleased.
“Yes, Father. Yes. Cha Zhiming is his eldest son, by his first wife. General Cha has younger sons by his second wife. Zhiming suggested matching his eleven-year-old half-brother with Fei-Fei, and the General agreed. None of this is official until the matchmaker approaches you, of course. But we’re good friends, so Zhiming told me. Informally, of course.”
I opened my mouth, but Stepmother laid a warning hand on mine.
Father beamed at Stepmother. “Well, what do you think of little Fei-Fei marrying into the Cha family?”
Fei-Fei was only the daughter of a concubine, a younger daughter of minor stature. Any son of General Cha was highly eligible. She could do far worse in the matchmaking stakes.
“She’s still quite young,” Stepmother replied in an even, unruffled voice. “Isn’t it unusual nowadays to make these approaches so early?”
“Stepmother,” said Tongyin, “you’re right. Quite right. But the General obeys his mother’s every wish. Old Madame Cha wants the General to settle her grandsons’ marriages before she dies. It would be unfilial of him to refuse.”
“Hmmm.” Father looked approving. Stepmother, merely thoughtful. She put some fruit on my plate and shot me another look.
“Father, there is one more thing,” continued Tongyin. “A small thing. Zhiming tells me that the Cha family likes their future daughters-in-law to stay at their family home for a few weeks every year before the marriage.”
Again, Stepmother had to put a restraining hand on my arm. Gaoyin frowned at me and mouthed the words “Keep quiet.”
“But I thought Old Madame Cha was a very traditional lady,” Stepmother said, her voice mild and steady. “Isn’t she afraid her grandson and Fei-Fei will meet before the wedding?”
Tongyin nodded. “She is, definitely. She’s very traditional. Fei-Fei won’t meet the boy. Old Madame Cha just wants to get to know the girls because she’s afraid she won’t live long enough to see her younger grandsons’ weddings.”
The fear inside me rose higher. Fei-Fei couldn’t be allowed near that family.
“Well, well,” Father said. “Let’s wait and see what happens. Plans made over wedding wine may come to nothing.”
“What about Cha Zhiming?” I asked Tongyin. “Why is he still unmarried?”
“Unmarried, yes, but his fiancée has been staying with them for a month each year since she was a girl. When Zhiming graduates, they’ll get married.”
Then he tilted his chair back and leaned over to whisper in my ear. “Don’t worry, Little Sister, all isn’t lost. I’ll ask Zhiming to make you his concubine!”
I didn’t bother telling him how badly he had misinterpreted my look, for now Stepmother rose from her seat.
“Please excuse me. I would like to take a stroll. After all that food last night, I think a long walk around the Old Garden is in order.”
I stood up. “I’ll walk with you. Gaoyin, why not come with us?”
***
The Old Garden had been designed as a retreat, with secluded spots where one could sit quietly to compose poetry or read. This we knew from a plan of the garden that had been drawn by the anonymous landscaper one of our ancestors had hired to create it. Halfway around the lake, an embankment of turf was planted with stands of oleander and pine that cast their shade onto the path. Together we ascended its ridge to where an ancient pine shaded a row of stone seats. A pungent resinous scent rose up to greet us as we walked over a layer of brittle needles.
“Tongyin has no idea what a monster that friend of his—” I began.
“Never mind Tongyin,” Gaoyin interrupted. “The question is, how can we keep Fei-Fei away from the Cha family?”
“We could reject that once-a-year visit,” I suggested.
“Not good enough. We’d have to tell Father why. And anyway, if Father agrees to even an afternoon visit, she would be in danger. The big question is how to avoid marriage to that family altogether.”
“Let me figure out how to handle this,” said Stepmother. “Old Madame Cha is very traditional.” She took a deep breath and folded her hands in her lap. “As your father says, it may all come to nothing, so please, Leiyin, don’t do or say anything. You’ve warned us, but hasty actions will only create more problems.”
“But shouldn’t we warn Father now?”
“Third Stepdaughter, please trust me in this.”
“Don’t fret, Leiyin,” said Gaoyin. “Stepmother will find a way through this.”
I nodded. We sat for a few minutes in solemn silence.
“Let’s talk about something else,” Stepmother said. “First Stepdaughter, when you were here for Sueyin’s engagement party, you came to me for advice. How is your situation now?”
My sister’s face flushed and she looked almost shy. “I did as you suggested, Stepmother. One of my servants has a sister who just had a baby girl. I hired the sister and she brings the baby with her. I spend a good part of each day with the baby. She’s such a darling. I can hardly bear to be away from her.”
“Good. Love the child as though she were your own.”
“Why?” I asked. “Why have you taken in a servant’s child?”
“Gaoyin is trying to conceive. I think her maternal essence needs help to flow more strongly. Sometimes fostering another’s child invigorates a woman’s essence.”
Stepmother laughed at my skeptical look. “It’s a cure passed down from my mother’s family. Continue your walk, my dears. I need to get back to the house.”
I held my tongue, but once Stepmother was well on her way around the lake, I shook my head. “That sounds like folklore, not science, Eldest Sister.”
“We’ve exhausted science, both Western and Chinese. This is a bit of folklore that does no harm. I enjoy having a little one in our home.”
“Is Shen so impatient for a son?”
She put her head in her hands. “It’s Shen’s mother. She wants him to take a concubine because we have been married three years already. She’s impatient for a grandson.”
“Shen adores you. He’d never take a concubine.”
“I like to think we’re a modern couple, but the truth is, he’s still totally obedient to his family. He’d take a concubine if his mother insisted.” Then her voice dropped to a whisper. “Oh, Leiyin. I can’t bear the thought of him with anyone else.”
“You’re First Wife. You’re allowed your say about concubines. Make Shen pick someone illiterate or ugly, someone he could never love.”
“I’m hoping Stepmother’s advice will let me avoid that. There. Now you know the truth. Your Eldest Sister is just a barren wife.” She smiled and wiped her eyes.
Tears welled up in my own eyes to see my imperious older sister so insecure, so vulnerable. Hanchin would never take a concubine if I proved barren. We’d adopt orphans, perhaps even one of those Eurasian children nobody wanted. Just thinking about Hanchin gave me courage. I took a deep breath.
“There’s something I want to tell you, Eldest Sister. A secret.” She looked up with a small smile, prepared to hear a childish confidence.
“I’ve decided to go to Hangchow, even though it’s against Father’s wishes.”
“Leiyin! You can’t! You’ve only just regained Father’s goodwill.” Exasperation replaced the smile on her face.
“All I need is money for room and board. And train fare. Will you help? I’m going to sell my jewellery but I’ll need to borrow more.”
“Third Sister! You can’t do this! Think what it would mean if you disobeyed Father.”
“It’s the boarding fees that cost the most,” I continued, as though she hadn’t said anything. “I could never come up with that much.”
“Leiyin, think what Father will do if you defy him like this.”
“Once I get to Hangchow Women’s, it’ll be all right. We all know how impulsive he is when he gets angry, but I won’t be around for him to punish. He’ll forgive me eventually. You’ve said often enough that Father is as quick to forgive as he is to get angry. Will you help me?”
She held my wrist in a tight grip and shook her head.
“You’ll be punished.”
“What can he do except drag me home? Once I’m at school, he’d lose face if he had to do that. He’ll have to go along with it or risk having people think he has no control over his children.”
“Third Sister, listen to me. You’ve always been his favourite daughter. But such outright defiance would be unforgivable.”
“Even if I get only one year at college, it would be better than none at all. Maybe Father will get used to the idea.”
Again she shook her head. She stood to leave. I jumped up and caught her by the hand.
“Please, Gaoyin. This means more to me than you can possibly imagine. My entire future, my happiness depends on it, Eldest Sister. You must help me.” For all my determination, I knew I could not do it on my own.
She saw my tears but didn’t waver. “I can’t, Little Sister. And I won’t.”
She clambered down the path and left me alone beneath the pines.
***
I suppose it was a good thing she left when she did, I tell my souls. I was ready to break down and tell her about Hanchin and why everything depended on university.
Gaoyin tried to warn you of the consequences. My yin soul chews on the end of a pigtail.
My hun soul hovers at the edge of the terrace, gleaming. You overestimated Eldest Sister’s capacity for defiance.
No, I didn’t. But I hoped. I had to try something, anything. I insist, still feeling the sting of desperate tears.
It’s a good thing your first sister had the sense to refuse you, my yang soul says. He paces around the terrace, hands tucked into his wide sleeves. He glances up at the sky. Ah, a full moon.
We stand still, all four of us, and lift our eyes to watch the moonrise. I look for the rabbit in the moon, even though I know it’s only a fairy tale. I remember Gaoyin reading me the story for the first time, when I was Fei-Fei’s age.
She was always the bossy one with all the answers, I tell my souls. I couldn’t believe she was asking Stepmother for advice.
You always did underestimate your stepmother, says my hun soul.
