Sons of navarus box set.., p.21
Sons of Navarus Box Set #2, page 21
Sasa said nothing but worked to get a sense of what he was feeling. Her empathic abilities had finally begun to work on him recently, but now all she felt was power emanating from him.
Sliding his hand between her legs, he buried his fingers beneath her pants and stroked her tender skin like only he could. He wasn’t going to make this easy.
“Vasilije, we need to talk.”
“No. The last thing we need to do is talk. Talking is only going to make me want to kill someone again, Sasa.”
At the sound of her name, she pushed his hand away and turned in his arms to face him. Those crystal blue eyes stared at her with a steely look, as if to tell her she was treading on dangerous ground. If that was the case, so be it. What had happened between them and Thane needed to be resolved.
“So this is going to make things all better? A little sex and everything will be fine?”
He arched one dark eyebrow and a slow grin came across his lips. “I’ve always found it to be the case, love.”
His expression was growing icier by the moment, unnerving her. “So I’m back to being ‘love’ again?”
Vasilije closed the inches between them and held her to his body. Every muscle pressed into her, and she felt his cock as it nudged up against her hip. He was enjoying this.
“Sasa, I came up here to make love to the woman I adore. But I’m not going to beg.”
He slid his hand up her back and grabbed a fist full of hair. Gently tugging, he forced her to look at him as he spoke. “What? Now you want a gentle soul like the one I saw you feeding from downstairs?” Shaking his head, he continued, “Sorry, love. But you don’t really want that. If you did, you wouldn’t have been with me from the beginning.”
“I never had a choice,” she admitted, without a hint of guilt.
“Don’t play that sweet thing with me. I know you, Sasa. Everyone else in this monastery might think you’re that innocent creature, helpless little Sasa with big bad Vasilije, but you and I know differently. I wouldn’t have chosen you if you weren’t as tough as you are. You not only had a choice, but you decided to be mine. I don’t care if you prefer the rest of the world to think our relationship is entirely under my control, but you’re not going to get off the hook as easily with me. And as for Thane…”
His voice trailed off and Sasa watched as those stunning eyes darkened before her. In a flash, his hand was around her neck, stroking her skin. He didn’t squeeze or inflict pain, but it was a clear sign she understood immediately, even before he spoke.
“You’re mine, Sasa. Not mine sometimes. Not mine most of the time. Mine. Always. I won’t allow another male to feed you again. The next time, I’ll kill him, whether Terek is there to hold me back or not. No matter who it is.”
The pad of his thumb gently stroked up and down the column of her neck as he spoke. When he finished, his fangs descended until the sharp tips showed just below his lip. “Do you understand?”
“I understand you want to call me yours, but you’ve left me too many times already since siring me.”
As the last of the words left her lips, his thumb’s movement stopped and his expression grew hard. She waited for him to speak, wishing she could read his mind more than his emotions but steadying herself to deal with whatever he said.
“Sasa, you have a choice to make. I’ve already made my choice.”
“What do you mean? What choice have you made?” she asked, scared by his cryptic words. For the first time, she was frightened. Had she pushed this too far? Was she truly ready to go through with what had been in her mind for weeks?
“I chose to have only you. While I was gone, I fed from no others, even though I had my vampires around me at the willing.”
The idea that beautiful women had been at his beck and call while he was gone, wanting nothing more than to serve their sire, hit Sasa hard inside. “I wasn’t able to do that, Vasilije. I’m still a new vampire and I have no vampires like you. And as you know perfectly well, I couldn’t go out to the village to find any. It’s too dangerous.”
Releasing her, he turned his back toward her and walked away. “Fuck, Sasa! What do you want from me? Do you really want some fucking pathetic male who will let you drink from everyone around him while he stands and watches?”
“No! I want you.” Softening her voice, she said, “But you have to want me.”
For a long moment, he said nothing. When he turned toward her, she saw a look of rage in his eyes. In a flash, he closed the space between them and pressed her against the wall. “When have I ever made you feel like I don’t want you? When I chose you over all my other vampires? When I make love to you and give you more than I’ve ever given another woman in four hundred years? When I fall asleep with you in my arms every morning and wake up with you every night? I had to leave you because of who I am in our world.”
“And bringing Elizabeth and Delilah to our home?”
“You know that was to help us in the fight against the Archons,” he said flatly.
“It hurt my feelings to see women you’d been with before here, in my own home, and you never once thought of how that would make me feel.”
“Maybe you’d like it if I let you fuck another male while I stood around waiting for you to finish?”
“So my lack of consideration for your feelings is a crime, but yours is defensible?”
The emotional distance between them seemed so wide now as he stood looming over her asking these questions. She’d promised herself she’d remain strong, but the truth in his words cut her to the quick.
“I hadn’t shared myself with either of those women in ages. Not since you. You drank from him after only a few days.”
“Vasilije…I…it meant nothing to me. It was just blood. Nothing more.”
“Sasa, I’m your sire. I protect you. I give you what you need. No one else. In this, I won’t allow any argument.”
“Even if it hurts me?”
His voice betrayed the merest hint of kindness now. “Do you think it’s a coincidence that I came back here just as you were feeding from him? I felt your need. I returned because you needed me.”
Sasa swallowed hard to rid herself of the lump that had formed in her throat. She’d been such a fool! She’d never even considered the possibility that he’d felt her hunger or cared. With sadness, she realized he’d been the sire he’d promised to be from the first night he made her vampire.
“I’m sorry, Vasilije. I didn’t…I didn’t think.”
She couldn’t stand the gulf between them any longer. Wrapping her arms around him, she rested her head on his chest, hopeful that he felt the sadness inside her.
His hand touched her hair and he held her close. “Sasa, I’m the one who made you. How could you ever think I’d be able to let you suffer?”
Sorrow consumed her, and she let the tears flow that she’d held back since she’d watched him leave that night. Against his chest, she sobbed, “I thought you didn’t care. I didn’t know. First, you bring your vampires here and I know they…you…” Sasa stammered, unable to say the words. “Then you left without even saying goodbye. I thought you didn’t care.”
Kissing the top of her head, he whispered, “Don’t ever believe I don’t care. I’d be lost without you, Sasa. I wouldn’t want to go on if you weren’t with me. There would be nothing for me without you.”
Looking up, she smiled through her tears. “I’m sorry.”
Vasilije bent his head down to kiss her and for the first time since he’d returned, she felt like the man she’d fallen in love with all those nights ago was truly there. He cradled her face tenderly and stared into her eyes with that look that never failed to make her knees weak.
“I need to remember you haven’t been a vampire for long. But never doubt how much you mean to me, Sasa. In the middle of this civil war with the Archons, I need you with me. I can fight without you, kill without you, but I can’t live without you.”
When he kissed her again, the passion that had been there between them when they’d first found one another was there once more, as strong as ever. His lips pressed against hers, demanding the desire she so wanted to share with him. The sensual being who had seduced her simply by being himself was there again in every kiss and every touch.
His hands caressed her body, bringing it alive again, and she reveled in the feelings he brought out in her, remembering that first time his lips met hers and set her soul on fire.
*
Vasilije closed his eyes and turned away from Sasa, even as he pulled her body to his. The rage that had nearly overwhelmed him before as he watched her feed from Thane surged in him again now. Until that moment, he’d been sure their time at the monastery had dulled the male he’d always been, making him more like Saint and Terek than himself. For weeks he’d pushed against the restriction of being that male, wanting once again to take off and go out into the night to hunt. To be the male he’d been for so long.
The truth was that this life with Sasa was what he wanted. He just wanted it in a different way. The life they’d settled into here bored him and in truth, he’d relished the chance to leave to save his vampires. He knew he could never tell Sasa that. She’d never understand.
Or maybe she would. All he knew was that this civil war was making him feel like a trapped animal in every facet of his life, including the one he’d made with her.
Sasa pressed her body next to his, prodding a tiny lick of guilt to form inside him. He’d never intended anything to happen… He shook his head to expel the idea. He was the sire here, not her. If he needed…no, wanted to have someone else, that was his prerogative.
The night air slid over his skin, and he looked out the window toward the mountains of his homeland. They called to him—whispered their seductive Romanian chant into his soul, making him want to feel the wind on his cheek and the earth under his feet.
“Vasilije? What’s wrong?” Sasa whispered against his neck as she planted tiny kisses over his skin.
“Come. I want you to feel what I feel.”
She turned her face up toward his and her eyes widened. “What do you mean?” she asked, her voice trembling.
Shaking his head, he took her hands and wrapped them around his waist. “Hold on and don’t let go.”
Before she could answer, he had his arms around her and they were racing through the Romanian night toward somewhere he’d kept even from her. A place high in the mountains away from everyone and everything in the world—other vampires, other Sons, and all the responsibility that threatened to smother the life he had with her.
He stopped in a patch of trees, and as he held her to him, looked up at the moon overhead. The night sky from the top of the mountain was just as he remembered it from years ago. The stars seemed to hang like silvery decorations, so close if he reached out his hand he felt like he could touch them.
He’d come here with his father as a child and returned right after becoming a vampire over four hundred years ago. Of all the places in the world, it was the only one he felt truly at home in. He was the son of a Romanian prince here, but he was a creature of the night here too, a vampire whose soul cried out for the earthy touch this place offered.
“Vasilije?”
Looking down, he saw the confusion on Sasa’s face. “Do you remember when you first came here when I called you to me? I told you this was home.”
Sasa nodded. “Yes. I remember thinking that this was a place I could see you calling home. It’s wild and colder than anywhere I’ve ever been. It’s you.”
Vasilije chuckled at her description of Romania. For someone who’d lived her entire human life in New Orleans, she naturally would think of his homeland like that.
Dipping his head, he kissed her hard on the mouth as he tugged at the clothes that hid her body from him. He wanted to see her milky white skin shimmer in the moonlight as he ran his fingertips over her neck and down to her full breasts. Naked, she stood in front of him like a goddess surrounded by nature, the way female vampires were always intended to be, taking him back centuries.
“Vasilije?”
Sasa’s voice brought him back to the present and the rage he’d hoped would dissipate pushed against his insides as the thought of her with Thane returned.
His gaze slid over her body, pausing on those parts of her he’d worshipped so many nights. That spot where her leg met her body, so soft next to his lips as he sunk his fangs into her skin. Her deep pink nipples, so tender and responsive. The place right above her collarbone that made her clutch him close to her as she pleaded for him to never stop.
“Did you fuck him?”
Her eyes grew wide with surprise, and a look of hurt filled them. “No! I swear what you saw was the only thing.”
As she spoke, she reached her hands out to touch him, but Vasilije backed away. Gritting his teeth at her words, he hissed, “The only thing between the two of you.”
His mind whirled at the reality that there was anything between Sasa and another male. The thought sickened him, made him want to kill someone. Anyone.
Her.
Sasa moved toward him. “Vasilije, please listen to me. You said back there you understood. I didn’t know. I swear it. And I swear it will never happen again.”
He didn’t back away this time but let her press her palms to his chest. She stared up at him with big brown eyes, and her touch sent a jolt through him. It mixed with his emotions, forcing out logic and everything he should have known about her. In a flash, he had her in his arms and pushed back against a tree, the sharp ridges of its rough bark pressing painfully against his hands.
As he looked down into her eyes now, he saw them register her fear. She should be afraid. He’d spared her once before when she’d betrayed him, and he’d sworn she’d never get that kind of reprieve again.
But she was his vampire—his duty was to take care of those he’d created.
He’d killed one of his own before. For her. He wasn’t above killing to avenge a betrayal.
Love and anger battled inside him, with jealousy coming in when anger grew tired of the fight. His mind replayed the sight of Sasa’s mouth on Thane’s wrist, taking from him what she’d only ever taken from her sire. The look of contentment on her face as she drank that only he’d ever seen was now part of another male’s memories.
His chest felt like someone was squeezing it in a vice. If she were another, he’d have killed her already and walked away with a clear conscience. She’d broken the trust between them, something sacred to vampires. By law, he could impose whatever punishment he chose other than death, but the civil war had made even death a choice, regardless of whether or not those fucking Archons recognized that or not.
But she wasn’t another. She was Sasa.
No soul on Earth since Nina had touched him like she had. Somehow, in her gentle way, she’d wormed herself into his heart within mere days, and in just a short time as his vampire had become as important to him as the air he breathed. He hadn’t lied when he told her he couldn’t live without her.
If only it had been a lie. He’d told that lie before many times, never meaning a word he said, but this time was different. Sasa was different. He’d stopped trying to understand why he loved her—if it was her kindness, her beauty, her body. He still had no honest answer other than there was something about her that he couldn’t do without.
From what seemed a million miles away he heard her voice say his name and plead for him to remember what they meant to one another. “Vasilije…Vasilije, please hear me. I love you, and I know you love me, no matter what you’re feeling. Don’t do this. Please.”
For a moment, love won out and he moved his hands to cradle her face. “Can you feel what I’m feeling, Sasa? As an empath, shouldn’t you be able to?”
She seemed for a moment to stifle the tears that began to fill her eyes, but then her gaze fell to his hands. Blood streamed from gashes the bark had inflicted and rolled down toward his elbows. “Vasilije! You’re hurt!” she cried as she took his hands in hers to comfort him.
He didn’t want comfort. He wanted answers. Tearing his hands from hers, he bellowed, “I asked you if you could feel what I’m feeling! Tell me!”
“Yes,” she said quietly. “Yes, I can feel how angry and hurt you are.”
“I’m not fucking hurt, love.”
“Yes, you are, Vasilije. I can feel it. I know I did this, but believe me I didn’t mean to.”
He moved his blood stained right hand to her neck and encircled it almost entirely. “Do you know how many have come before you, Sasa? How many there are right now I could leave you for?”
He saw the hurt from his cruel words wash over her face, but then she lifted her chin and stared into his eyes. “I won’t do this with you, even if I deserve it. I won’t,” she said defiantly, ratcheting up his rage a few more notches.
He reached around her head, grabbed a handful of hair, and tugged. “You won’t do it? You betray your sire and then you get to decide what will and won’t happen? I don’t think so, pet.”
Sasa pushed against him, but he pushed back, pinning her to the tree trunk. “You want to push me, love? I’m a four hundred year old vampire. You aren’t even a year old in our world. You don’t have the strength necessary to defeat me.”
Vasilije pushed her harder into the bark of the tree, knowing exactly what it had done to his hands. “Feel anything yet, love?”
Whether it was pain or anger, whatever she was feeling exploded out of her. She clawed her hands at his neck, dragging them down the front of his shirt and tearing it open as she screamed, “You want me to feel the pain you felt when I betrayed you? Then fucking rake my back up and down this tree trunk! Go ahead! Make me bleed like you. Do it! Or kill me like you think you can and just forget me. If that’s what you need to do to feel better, then do it!”
Tears streamed down her cheeks, and Vasilije buried his head between her neck and shoulder. He didn’t want to see her cry, even if they were tears of rage instead of sadness. But the sound of her sobbing invaded his ears, making him feel like knives were slicing cuts out of his heart.
