Grounded, p.11
Grounded, page 11
Despite Sophie’s protests, Keller ushers her down the tunnel.
“I need to be on the ice,” Sophie says. “I belong with my team.”
“Didn’t you have enough of this song and dance last season?” Keller guides Sophie to one of the beds in the athletic training room. She wasn’t impressed with Sophie’s attempt to play through her injury last season. Is she punishing Sophie for it now? “What happened on the hit?”
“Nothing.” Sinclair hit her, she let him into her head which was fucking stupid, and now she’s trapped here while he gloats on the ice. She let him chase her off the ice. Now, he knows he can do it, and he’ll come at her even harder.
“You rushed off the ice and threw up for no reason?” Keller asks.
“Maybe I ate something wrong.”
Maybe she drank something wrong.
Sophie gags but she doesn’t puke. She squeezes her eyes shut, ignores the tears at the corners, and wills her body to cooperate.
Keller taps Sophie’s knee.
She opens her eyes. Keller has a cup of water in her hand.
Tap water.
Keller says something. Sophie can’t hear it over the buzz in her ears. She takes the cup. Does she have to drink the whole thing if she wants to play? She raises the cup to her lips. Her hand shakes and water spills over the sides of the cup and drips down her wrist.
She can’t do it. She tosses the cup in the sink and doesn’t look at her athletic trainer. “Gatorade. Electrolytes.”
“Of course.”
Sophie takes a deep breath as Keller moves out of sight. She needs to bring herself under control or she won’t be allowed back on the ice. Butler and Sinclair kept her off the ice last season, but they won’t do it again this one. She loves hockey. She feels more at home on ice than she does anywhere else. No one will take it away from her.
She takes a deep breath and slowly lets it out.
Keller returns with a purple Gatorade, Sophie’s favorite. The cap is already off. Sophie’s mid-inhale, and she stutters and chokes on air. Her fingers twitch, but she can’t make herself reach for the bottle. New tears sting at her eyes. “I’m sorry. Can I—can I have a blue one?”
This time, Sophie watches as Keller goes to the fridge on the far side of the room. She returns with an armful of bottles, Gatorades and waters. She hands Sophie a blue Gatorade with the cap still on. “I’ll be behind you on the bench. Whenever you need it, I’ll have a fresh bottle for you, okay?”
Sophie’s words stick in her throat. She nods and hopes it conveys her thanks. It takes two tries to open her Gatorade. She drinks it in small sips. At this rate, she’ll miss the whole first period.
Weak.
This is why women don’t belong in the NAHL.
“We’re talking about this after the game.” Keller squeezes Sophie’s knee and claims her attention. “But I believe you didn’t hit your head. So, let’s get you back in the game.”
Sophie nods again. She hopes Keller hears the thank you in the gesture.
★
Sophie joins her team in the locker room for intermission. Several of her teammates look at her, curious or concerned, but no one interrupts Elison’s speech. Sophie sits between Merlin and Elsa. She hunches her shoulders so she doesn’t touch either of them. She used a fresh water bottle to rinse out her mouth and brush her teeth, but her skin is sticky with cold sweat. She wants to win and then get the hell out of this city.
She focuses on her coach. From what he says, she gathers they’re down by two now. As soon as he’s done talking, she turns to Merlin. “They scored on the power play?”
“Yeah, but Sofe—”
“Who?”
“Sinclair. Elsa was in the box. But don’t get mad at her!” Merlin speaks quickly as if he thinks Sophie will turn and unleash her temper on Elsa. “Any of us would have done it, but she reached him first. You were white as a ghost when you came off the ice and then you didn’t come back.”
She ignores the concern and the questions he clearly has. “I’m back now. We’re winning this game.”
“Sofe—” He reaches for her, and she flinches back. He drops his hand, but he can’t hide the hurt in his eyes. “We’re here for you. You know that, right?”
Until you’re traded. Until a new team buys your loyalty.
“Help me score,” she says. “I want to bury them.”
“Anything you want.”
Sophie nods and stares at her hands. She’s averaging over two points a game right now. It’ll be easy to tie this one with Merlin and Elsa locked in. And then they’ll pile on more goals after that. She cannot allow Butler or Sinclair to think they have the ability to throw her off her game. These next two periods have to be a statement. Sophie Fournier won’t back down. She won’t be broken.
She dodges Elsa on the way up the tunnel, but it means she walks with Jonny instead. He used to be a Boulder. Can she trust him? Maybe she should slow up, walk with Woodsy instead. Woodsy still jumps at his own shadow. He isn’t a threat to her.
“I know how to end his career.” Jonny keeps his voice low, but his gaze is dark and determined as if all he needs is her permission. “I can make it look like an accident.”
Oh. Concord is her team. Isn’t that what she told Elison before the season started? Isn’t that why Butler was fired? Concord is hers, and her team supports her. She gives Jonny a weak smile. “All I want is to win this game.”
“Then, we win it,” he says.
★
Sophie skates a few laps around their half of the ice as intermission winds down. She’s shaky as if she just finished running a set of hills, but she can make it through this game. She’s played tired, she’s played sick, and her body may be weak, but she could win this game on willpower alone.
Elison waits at the end of the bench for her. He opens his mouth, but she interrupts him before he can question her readiness. “Put me out there. I can do this.”
The fans are merciless. On the other bench, Butler and Sinclair and the rest of the Boulders no doubt plot how to throw her off her game again. It won’t happen. She meets Elison’s gaze and allows him to see her conviction.
“First line on the ice!” Elison calls.
Sophie skates to center ice. Unsurprisingly, Sinclair meets her there. She stares him down and doesn’t flinch, even as he studies her for signs of weakness. “You should have scored more while I was gone. Two goals won’t be enough.”
She sets her skates for the faceoff. Sinclair says something, but his words don’t penetrate her focus. She sweeps the puck to safety. Sinclair bears down on her, as if he can force her to buckle and fall to the ice. She ducks down and then pushes off.
Theo loses control of the puck, but Sophie chases Wimberly down. She slams the Boulder into the boards and kicks the puck out to Elsa. She pins Wimberly until Elsa clears the zone. Denver wants a physical game? Sophie can do that.
She skates hard to catch up to Elsa. She trails Elsa enough to keep them onside. It’s the two of them against Lenno and his d-men. Sophie knows with sharp clarity that Concord is about to score. It’s only a matter of which one of them puts the puck away.
Elsa drives the net. Lenno and Kirkland commit to her. It leaves Sophie open for Elsa’s pass. Elsa threads the puck over Kirkland’s stick and between Pickard’s legs. Sophie catches the puck on the curve of her stick and snaps it past Lenno.
The crowd falls silent.
Sophie turns to Elsa. She doesn’t punch her fist in the air or kick up her leg in celebration. A goal isn’t worth celebrating, only a win.
“Again,” she tells Elsa.
She leads the way through the fist bump line. Her team follows her example, and the bench isn’t raucous with the goal. Sophie is centered, focused, but as though there’s a thick slab of ice between her and the world around her. She sits on the bench. Keller hands her an unopened Gatorade.
★
In the waning seconds of the period, Sophie and Elsa have another breakaway. This time, Lenno cheats toward Sophie. She passes to Elsa who scores off her backhand.
Tie game.
The third period will be a fresh start.
★
In the locker room, everyone watches Sophie, wary. She looks up but doesn’t say anything. Their stares don’t reach her. The same armor which keeps Sinclair’s words from affecting her, it keeps her team at a distance as well.
Finally, Merlin gathers the courage to nudge her with his knee. “Congrats on six-hundred.”
Oh, right. Her assist on Elsa’s goal was another milestone. Hadn’t that been her aim? Notch her six-hundredth point in front of Butler and show him she’s the best fucking player he’s ever coached?
“Thanks,” she says, a beat too late.
Her teammates look at each other, uneasy.
★
It takes Sophie a couple of shifts to realize how, every time the play is blown dead, there are two teammates between her and Sinclair. Denver’s captain still has plenty to say. He shoves at Theo and tries to start shit with Elsa, but no one lets him reach Sophie.
She thanks her teammates by scoring the go-ahead goal.
If her team holds this lead, they’ll win the game. She and Sinclair each have two goals apiece. She doesn’t want to end this game his equal. She turns to look down her bench and across to Denver’s. Jonny leans forward to catch the action on the ice and blocks her view.
★
With the score 3-2, Butler pulls Lenno when there’s a little over a minute left in the game.
Sophie’s on the ice as Rawlings joins as the extra attacker. She breaks up a pass between Sinclair and Rawlings, but Pickard gathers the puck and pulls it out of her reach. He passes down to Wimberly. Sophie drifts down to cover him and then barks out a warning as Rawlings tries to slip backdoor.
Kevlar adjusts to guard him.
Wimberly only has two options. Sophie’s moving before he passes. She jumps into the lane, picks off his pass to Kirkland at the point, and outlets the puck to Elsa. Elsa is already two strides out of the zone. Sophie and Kirkland are the closest to her, and they both chase Elsa down the ice.
Kirkland gains on Elsa and tries to knock her off the puck. She weathers his pressure, keeps possession, then drops the puck back to Sophie. Sophie whips the puck into the empty net. A moment later, she’s crosschecked from behind. She stumbles and almost falls. She spins around, stick up, ready to hit back, but Merlin grabs her and hauls her back.
Theo and Kirkland exchange blows. Elsa tries to fight Rawlings and Sinclair at the same time. Merlin pushes Sophie toward the bench and then dives into the fray.
“I should be a part of that,” Sophie says.
Zehavi reaches over the bench boards to grab a fistful of her jersey. He reels her the rest of the way to the bench. “You’re staying right here.”
Sophie looks over at Butler. This physical, nasty brand of hockey is what he loves. He meets her gaze, and she bares her teeth in a challenging smile. I did it. I beat you. I scored my first NAHL hat trick and put up my six hundredth point. I played Condors hockey. You’re the one who isn’t good enough.
He looks away first.
The officials sort out all the penalties and send players from both teams down the tunnel to finish out the game. Elsa pauses by the bench, blood on her face, her cheeks flushed, her eyes wild, victorious. If this was another game, Sophie would scold her for fighting. Today, Sophie nods and wishes she’d been at her side.
Elison puts Jonny, Woodsy, and Kansas out as their forwards. He selects Zehavi and Kuzy for the backend. Sophie chews her mouth guard as time winds down. There’s twenty-six seconds left, and she won’t see another shift. Twenty seconds now. The game is almost over. She isn’t ready for the aftermath. Then you shouldn’t have fallen apart. She grinds her teeth into her mouth guard.
The buzzer sounds.
Wimberly tries to start something with Jonny, but the officials are ready for it. They jump in before anyone can do any damage. Both teams are separated and herded toward their respective benches. Sophie takes her place at the bench gate as her teammates file off.
The fans rain down obscenities and insults. Sophie ignores them and pats her teammates on the back, hands out compliments, and makes sure each one of them has something positive to take from the game.
Spitz and Woodsy linger and then flank her on the way to the locker room. Mary Beth waits for her outside the doors, and Sophie ushers her two teammates inside.
“I can take you off media tonight,” Mary Beth says.
“Then they’ll have twice as many questions tomorrow. I’d rather face them now.”
“Sophie—”
“I won’t screw up. I know how to handle the media.”
“I was going to ask if you’re okay.” Mary Beth’s face is soft, open, her expression too close to pity for Sophie’s liking.
Sophie summons a smile. In her first season, she promised Mary Beth there wouldn’t be any lies between them. But testing the lines she’ll use on the media later isn’t the same thing. “I ate something that didn’t agree with me. Some fluids, a full night’s sleep, and I’ll be as good as new.”
She slips into the locker room before Mary Beth presses for more. The side chatter stops as soon as Sophie’s inside. Self-conscious, she crosses the room to Kevlar. She should shower and prep for the media onslaught, but there’s something more important.
“Show me,” she says.
He holds his hands out, his knuckles already bruised from the scuffle after her last goal. She brushes her fingers over the red areas. Next, she moves to Theo. His lip is puffy, but there’s a glint in his eyes as if he wishes he could have fought longer. She moves to Jonny to make sure he didn’t take any damage at the end of the game before the officials could break things up. If she had been stronger, her teammates wouldn’t be hurt.
Elsa is her last check-in. Sophie traces the cut on her face. It isn’t deep enough to need stitches, but the trainers smeared something sticky on it to stop the bleeding.
“I’m okay.” Elsa catches Sophie’s hands and holds them. “We’re all okay.”
Everyone but me.
Elsa draws Sophie in until she can wrap her arms around her. It’s part hug, part warning to anyone else who might touch her. Sophie doesn’t lean into it so much as she falls. “Benny has all four of your pucks. Do you want a shower before media?”
Sophie nods.
She’s grateful when Elsa joins her without Sophie having to ask. Elsa keeps an arm around Sophie as she turns the water on. Sophie’s wrung out. She gave everything to the game, and now she doesn’t have anything left. Maybe she should have taken Mary Beth up on the media pass.
And let Sinclair win? Hide instead of celebrate everything good she did tonight? She has her first NAHL hat trick. She’s six games into the season, and she has two four-point nights. Sinclair threw his worst at her, and she came out on top.
They can’t fucking stop her.
Sophie showers quickly, in and out. She grabs her towel off the hook and dries off. She pulls her clothes on over wet skin. Elsa is still showering because she isn’t expected to answer questions tonight. Sophie touches Elsa’s wrist, as much of a thank-you as she can manage right now. She’ll have to find her voice quickly. Marty Owen won’t settle for a few looks or touches.
Back in the locker room, Sophie changes into her game day suit. She could use the extra armor today. She buttons her dress shirt, shrugs into her jacket, and deftly ties her tie. Despite the shower and the layers, she doesn’t feel any warmer. The ice wall which kept her distant during the game is still up. Will Marty Owen’s barbs slide off her the same as Sinclair’s insults? Will Rossetti’s concern fall flat, unable to reach her, the same as her teammates’?
“Do you want to talk about the fights at the end?” Jonny offers as the media is let in.
Marty Owen strides past him, on a mission. Merlin shifts closer to Sophie as if to block Owen’s charge. Sophie touches his arm, and he steps aside. Her heart swells with affection for her team. They step in for her, no matter who they’re up against. This is her team, and not because management chose her but because her teammates have.
Marty Owen looks her up and down with a critical eye. “You dressed up for us.”
“We’re flying to Boston tonight, and I have a feeling media will run long. I don’t want to hold up my team.”
“Tonight was a loaded game. You can’t blame us for having questions.”
Sophie offers a neutral expression and nothing more. She may have to stand in front of them, but she won’t make their jobs easier. They’ll have to fight for every answer they want.
“You left the first period in a hurry.” Concern colors Rickers’s tone, but it doesn’t stop him from pressing. “We scoured the replay, but the hit was clean. Did Sinclair say something to you?”
How far can she stretch the truth? She can’t outright lie to the media, especially if there’s a chance she’ll be caught in it.
“A fan caught you vomiting on their phone.” Rossetti is gentle as if she’s breaking the news to Sophie. “Did you hit your head?”
“I must have eaten something that didn’t agree with me,” Sophie answers blandly.
“It had nothing to do with Sinclair?”
“You think Sinclair had something to do with my pregame meal?”
Rossetti is too good of a reporter to let Sophie throw her off. “If it was something you ate, why isn’t the rest of the team sick?”
Sophie shrugs. “I’m glad my teammates are feeling well. I can tell you, I’ll avoid cream-based sauces on future game days.” She goes up on her tiptoes to make a show of looking over the reporters. “Spitz, you went with the marinara today, yeah?”
Spitz picks up on her cue. “Every game day.” He slings an arm around Peets’s shoulders. “I’m inspired by this guy, right here. The original Marinara Man.”
Peets socks Spitz in the stomach and then waves to the cameras as Spitz doubles over.
“Next time, I’ll go with the marinara,” Sophie says.
“You don’t follow a strict pregame routine?” Marty Owen asks.
