Green shadow, p.21
Green Shadow, page 21
Stifling a smile, I leaned back to enjoy this eclectic group of people who’d accepted me without hesitation. For the first time in decades, I truly felt part of a family.
Chapter 24
Mackenzie
I gazed around the large meadow. It was the first time I’d seen this much greenery in months. My eyes watered as I inhaled deeply, filling my lungs with the clean air of the forest. A longing tugged at my heart, and I wanted nothing more than to feel the energies of the earth. As it was, it broke my soul to stand here, looking at all the plant life, unable to hear the whispers of each blade of grass.
Shadow came to stand beside me. He made a slight motion with one hand, a signal only I would notice— I was safe for now. Since our first mission months ago, he’d stayed consistent with his little acts of kindness and support. Every time he acted in my interest, it chipped away at the layer of stone I’d wrapped around my heart. If Shadow betrayed me now, a piece of me would never recover.
Ben stood a few yards away, plucking flowers and ripping their petals off one by one. I rubbed absently at the bandages secured around my upper arm. Safety was never guaranteed when Ben was around.
Turning my attention away from the psychotic mage, I let a sad smile curl my lips. The first and last time they’d taken me to a forest, only days after my arrival at the facility, had made me nearly catatonic.
Dr. Smith must want to see how my tolerance is now that a few months have passed.
Ben cleared his throat, and I barely repressed a shudder of disgust. “Alright, Sunflower, time for another experiment.” He clapped his hands. His versions of experiments were vastly different from the ones Dr. Smith created. She might be coldly cruel and calculating, but Ben was downright sadistic in comparison.
I stayed silent, staring at him blankly. His left eyebrow twitched, a sure sign I was getting on his nerves. Keeping myself contained, and having that little win, was one of my few joys in life.
His voice took on a sugary sweet tone as he held up the control crystal. “Dr. Smith wanted to be here, but the higher-ups insisted on a progress report. However, since this crystal is a prototype, she is fine with me giving a detailed account. So let’s begin, shall we?”
Cringing inwardly, I waited to see what new horror the lab tech had concocted.
Putting the crystal to his lips, he spoke a hushed word into the smoky surface. I didn’t have to wait long for the effect. Within seconds, the pain hit, but it wasn’t the intense agony as before. I made a show of collapsing. Perhaps they would use this crystal more if I acted as if the pain was more profound. It would give me an advantage in the future.
Hitting the ground, I clawed at the collar, my mouth pinched in a line. Ben approached, knelt, and said, “scream, and I’ll make the pain stop.” I wanted to laugh. This pain was nothing compared to the original crystal. Instead, I thrashed more but stayed silent. His nose wrinkled in frustration.
The stream of pain came to an abrupt halt, and I waited a moment before standing up. As if the effects lasted longer.
When I looked to where my tormentor had been, I found him lying on the ground, Shadow standing over him, a bruise already blossoming on the left side of Ben’s face. Shadow’s knuckles were red and showed early signs of swelling.
“You fucking peon,” Ben spat. “I’ll have you in a cage for this. Then you’ll only have the shadows for company.”
Ben’s tirade continued, and Shadow let him run out of steam before stating. “You’re not as important as you think, parasite.”
Well, that set Ben off again. I didn’t care if he yelled all day. With his attention on Shadow, I had time to sneak to one side and run my hand down the rough bark of a tree. I couldn’t hear its voice, but simply having contact provided a balm to my soul.
“You have a bad habit of breaking things that aren’t yours to break,” Shadow told the man lying at his feet. “Dr. Smith is tired of having her specimens in less than peak physical form. It alters the data she’s collecting.” He nudged Ben with his toe. “She sent me to make sure you didn’t get overzealous.”
A pang of distrust roiled in my gut. My old paranoia reared its ugly head and seduced me with whispers of eventual betrayal. But I’d decided in GreenRiver not to let the voice win. I’d started to shed my barriers with Liz and Amber, even Lucan. Shadow had kept my confidence so far. Even now, his words said one thing, but his actions protected me. I could still be wary without alienating potential allies to the point that their betrayal became a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Ben didn’t respond but kept a wary eye on Shadow. “Alright, Terra. The pain controls still function fine. It’s time to see if this new control crystal lives up to its reputation.”
Bracing as Ben spoke into the gem, I strained to hear the word. The sound of the spell didn’t reach me, but the movement of his lips differed from before.
As his lips formed the last syllable of the word, the floodgates opened. I stopped wondering about the activation phrase; instead, I rejoiced in the incredible rush of power that accompanied the freeing of my magic. The intensity of the surge overwhelmed me for a moment, whiting out all my senses. A raw rush of power sent endorphins coursing through my system, and tears flowed from my eyes unnoticed.
I reached out hesitantly and brushed my fingers over the grass beside my knee. I felt the life present in each blade and could hear the faint whispers as they spoke to me. I was whole again, and it was glorious.
I drew my magic into me, swirling it around my core until I couldn’t possibly contain the power. It demanded a release. A grin turned up the corners of my mouth, and for the first time in months, I knew just what to do with that power.
Getting to my feet, I turned my attention back to Ben. The mind mage’s face darkened with lust. He coveted the sheer amount of power I could wield.
Ben’s look of greed quickly became pure terror as I slapped my palms together and drew them apart. Technically the motions were unnecessary but concentrating on the visuals after being without my magic for so long was difficult. I wasn’t going to kill Ben. My responsibility to Evie wouldn’t let me risk the potential fallout. But I was more than ready to get revenge for all the humiliation he’d caused me.
The earth rumbled, and shivers rippled the grass. Ben let out a shrill scream as the earth opened beneath him and then closed over the top. I let out a satisfied sigh as his muffled shouts continued to penetrate from the ground. I hadn’t buried him deep, only a foot or two. But he didn’t know that.
Shadow walked over to me leisurely, but he couldn’t completely hide the tight coil of his muscles. I bet he’s wondering if he’s next. If I’ll take this chance to escape.
Even if they opened the door and looked the other way, I couldn’t run. The oath I’d spoken to Dr. Smith was particular. I couldn’t free myself. The collar, a symbol of my confinement, needed to be removed before I could escape this place.
“Fool,” Shadow said as he came within a few steps of me. “He took too long activating the second trigger. This new crystal is supposed to grant another the use of your power.” Shadow’s nonchalance was blatantly fake. I’d scared the ‘scary bastard.’
A cold shiver raced down my spine as fear ripped through my heart. All the horrible things they could do with that amount of power ran around in my mind. My breath started to stutter, but I wrenched it under control. I had to focus on the things I could control. And right now, I had no control over how they would use me in the future.
“Are you planning to let him up?” Shadow asked while I calmed myself down.
“In a bit,” I said, my tone almost normal. My brain rapidly tried to think of a way to keep my power out of the wrong hands. “The asshole should have expected it.”
I had other questions too. If the crystal granted the wielder use of my abilities, why hadn’t Ben taken control and freed himself? Another anomaly hit. Why hadn’t the collar been activated? Was it because I hadn’t intended Ben any harm? Or maybe Dr. Smith had deactivated the device for this test.
I sat down and began to run my hands back through the grass. How can I protect my core magic from being used by the wrong hands?
Shadow raised an eyebrow at my statement and nodded in agreement.
“I would never go so far that they would punish Evie. Based on Ben’s past reactions, I have another five minutes before I need to let him out. Much longer and punishing me won’t be enough.”
Shadow crouched down next to me. His eyes stared at me with intensity. “Why don’t you run? I won’t stop you, and I’m sure one of your brothers could remove this collar in a blink.”. So, the good Doctor hadn’t shared everything about me with the staff.
“An oath binds me. I can’t run without breaking it. Unless freed, I’m stuck in this hellhole.” I wouldn’t dare ask Shadow to do it. He was no freer than I was, and whoever he protected was worth far more to him than me. Besides, I’d promised Evie I would take her with me, and I never went back on my word.
Slipping into my mind, I replayed my decisions from the moment I got Ben’s text. It wasn’t the first time I re-evaluated that chunk of time. Analyzing whether I’d made the right choices. An itch in my chest, right next to my heart, had me scratching at my chest. Maybe I could have asked for more help, and things could have been different. It was a driving force behind my need for change.
Shadow narrowed his eyes. “What are the terms of your oath?”
I gave him a sad smile. “If your boss hasn’t told you, I’m not sure I should.” The reminder was more for me than for him. I couldn’t forget that even though Shadow wasn’t here by choice, he’d caved enough to be free of a collar like mine and willingly followed orders. A person in his position would do and say anything to keep that freedom.
Shadow reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “You remind me so much of someone I used to know.” He mumbled, and I only just caught the words.
It took an enormous amount of will, but I caught myself before I could lean into his touch, the lonely part of me wanting the contact. But a sharp tug at my core had me remembering someone else’s touch. Knowing I shouldn’t hold out hope for the dragon, the man who got a glimpse of my dark past and ran, I couldn’t shake the thought of Lucan’s electric blue eyes or his protective dragon’s heart.
My face softened with the memories, and my longing must have shown on my face. Then, shadow misreading it as an invitation, leaned over and gently placed his mouth over mine.
His lips were warm, and he tasted of nuts and honey – the protein bar he’d eaten before we’d left the compound. My brain froze. It felt like years since the last time I’d kissed anyone, had this intimate connection with another human being. On the one hand, it felt wonderful, but at the same time, it felt wrong in the core of my being.
My magic bucked inside me, fueled by the rough tugging at my core. That feeling of wrongness intensified as if an outside force were glaring at me in disapproval. Then, without a conscious reaction, my powers snaked out. The grasses around me grew, bent, and twisted into ropes as thick as my pinky.
I tried to move back, to disengage from Shadow. Not wanting my rogue power to hurt him. But he held me tighter, trying to deepen the embrace.
With a roar in my mind that suspiciously sounded like a giant-scaled beast, my power acted. The ropes of grass wound around Shadow’s legs and arms. They dragged him the short distance across the field with a forceful yank and bound him to a tree.
The tree’s branches creaked and moaned as they moved to bind him tighter. A white light emanated from Shadow, almost invisible in the afternoon sun, opposite to the darkness he normally exuded.
Jumping to my feet, I rushed toward the bound man. Freaked out that my magic was acting of its own accord, I tried to gain control. I didn’t want his blood on my hands.
Shadow panted heavily and flexed as he tested the strength of the bonds. I pushed my will forward and shouted, “STOP!”
The branches and vines quivered, then froze. Sweat dripped from my forehead as I bent my focus to untangle Shadow from his leafy prison.
A petulant feeling accompanied his glacial slow release. I frowned. Plants had acted in my defense before, but only after I’d spent a significant time around them. They needed heavy doses of my magic to gain this level of independent action.
When Shadow’s feet hit the ground, determination transformed his features, and he moved towards me. I raised my hand as the vines twitched behind him.
“No.” I didn’t shout, but I needed to ensure there were no misunderstandings. Taking a step away, I made my position clear.
Shadow took a step away from the trees with a wary look. Then he turned to me, his gaze perplexed. “Why?” he asked and sunk a whole bunch of meaning into that one word. Why not grasp at something positive? Take the small joys where we can. “I like you, respect you even. And I know you have at least a kernel of trust for me. I would be in that hole with Ben if you didn’t.”
All valid points. But no matter how much trust I gave Shadow here, this place wasn’t a good foundation for anything real. And even if I could overlook that, I didn’t want to build that foundation with this man.
Adamant to sway me, he continued. “I will talk to Dr. Smith and have her assign us as a pair. I will treat you well.” He’d stood again, punctuating his words with hand gestures. Turning on his heel, he began to pace back and forth.
Taking a few steadying breaths, I squashed the urge to shout at him. Shadow had been here since he was young, probably the same age as me. But, unfortunately, I didn’t have a lot of memories of that time. And the few I did were hazy—a voice here, an image there. But in every piece of my past that I retained, none of the faces stuck. I only remembered those who came after Tyr and Alec dragged me from my fugue. Even after, the only love and support I’d ever gotten were from my siblings.
Shadow wouldn’t understand the components that make up a healthy relationship. All he saw was a partner with whom he could share his secrets, one who wouldn’t betray him for anything less than the most severe torture. I must have looked like a godsend. My heart shattered for the man.
I didn’t have the words to tell him, to explain my deep need for my blue-eyed dragon. But I had to try. Shadow deserved honesty.
“I have someone on the outside. The relationship was new, barely tested, but it was real in a way I can’t explain. I won’t give up on what it represented.” I held up my hands in a placating gesture. A piece of my soul would die if Shadow turned against me for this. Suppose he became a cold, ruthless monster towards me. I needed the brief respite being with Shadow provided. It gave me a similar strength to being with my family.
“But you said you’re trapped, that there was no escape, so why hold onto him?” He growled in frustration.
I didn’t debate for long. “Can I trust you?”
There was no hesitation. Shadow didn’t show any of the usual tells of someone lying. If anything, he seemed to be more frustrated with the question than he’d been with my refusal.
“Yes! Why the hell do you think I lied for you?” He threw his hands up in the air. “I’ve stopped Ben and haven’t tortured you as they want me to. I’ve been trying to gain your trust.”
“Huh?” This time it was my turn to be confused.
He paused for a moment, then coming to a decision, he said. “Time to put all the cards on the table, alright?”
I nodded. “Agreed.”
“Psyche had a vision years ago. She saw a time when she and I were free of this place, living in a small city, in a small house, with the whole world at our disposal.” I realized this vision had kept Shadow going. It had been the one piece of hope he’d never lost while trapped in this place.
“What does that have to do with me?”
“Psyche saw a series of key players. People who would enter our lives shortly before this paradise would occur. Some she told me not to trust, no matter how they tried to butter me up.” His gaze slid towards the ground, where faint sounds from Ben echoed. Shit. I’d forgotten about him. I’d have to let him up soon.
“Some,” he looked at me, “she said, I would need to do everything in my power to earn their regard. The future she saw would only happen if I could win ‘her’ over.” He ran his fingers through his midnight hair. “You are the woman in her vision. Psyche and I need you to be free, and I don’t know why.” He clenched his fist in frustration. “How can you help if you’re even more trapped than I am?”
I felt a burst of sympathy for Shadow. He was doing everything in his power to have a brighter future, and I decided his honesty deserved an honest response. A secret shared.
“I left a loophole in my oath, one my brothers will recognize. I promised not to run if they could hold me, but once my family frees me,” I fingered the collar, “I will no longer be bound to obey. And I will make sure they will never again put any being in a cage.”
My last words came out low with a snarl. Technically, anyone not affiliated with the facility could rescue me, but other than my family and the members of Catch and Release, why would anyone care enough to do so?
Sparks of light burst in the inky darkness of Shadow’s eyes, matching the aura I’d seen around him. I wondered if it was the flame of hope rekindling within him.
“Together. We’ll get out of here together,” I said.
It was a promise I fully intended to keep.
Chapter 25
Mackenzie
I released Ben from his cage a minute later, and the glare the mind-mage leveled at me was pure loathing. For a moment, I stood paralyzed with fear. Then he whispered into the crystal, and my magic again lay beyond a transparent wall, inaccessible.
I fell to my knees, losing my gift more painful than anything I’d ever felt. It was ten times worse than when the collar had snapped around my neck. Tears streamed down my face, and I wanted nothing more than to curl into a ball and moan as I weathered the storm.
