"But there was nothing to tell."

  "No, there wasn't." I pause, realising there is something to tell now. "I saw him yesterday, after I was done talking to Mother."

  An uncomfortable expression flits over Magnus' face, but he covers it quickly. "That's understandable if he's living at the palace for now."

  "It doesn't mean I like it. I mean, I don't dislike him. He seems like a nice person. But I don't like him like that."

  "I understand."

  "Should we walk back to the dorms, or is there somewhere else you want to go?" I ask him.

  "The dorms is good, but maybe we can take the long way through the grounds?" he suggests.

  "I like the sound of that." My inner tiger does too. I can feel her purring and urging me to let her out. I think I need to shift again, but that can come after whatever this conversation is.

  I grab my bag and hoist it over my shoulder.

  Magnus holds out an arm to me and I slip mine through, a wide smile on my face as I think about walking with him like this.

  "I think I was really worried about seeing you with Jeremy because of the fated mates thing," he admits as he pushes the door to the range open and the two of us step through.

  "I'm sorry," I whisper. "I didn't mean to make you feel that way."

  "It's not your fault you were told that," he points out. "And it's not your fault if you want to wait for someone who does make you feel that way."

  The cool air hits as we step outside. There are a couple of other people about, but none of them pay us any attention. I'm sure they have their own conversations to continue. No matter what my position is, no one really cares about what I do.

  "I already found someone who makes me feel that way," I admit softly.

  "Jeremy?" It takes me a moment to process the amusement in his voice and realising he;'s making a joke.

  "Definitely not Jeremy. He doesn't make my heart race and the room lights up."

  "And you know someone who does?"

  "Yes."

  "Do I know him?"

  "Better than anyone else does." I want to kiss him so badly. I can't believe I made us wait when he makes me feel this way.

  "I'm glad about that. Maybe one day soon, you'll be able to tell him."

  "I hope so too," I admit. "But I think I need to put the fated mates thing to rest first. Let Mother know I'm aware they're not real and find out why she's been lying to me my entire life."

  "That doesn't sound like a fun conversation."

  "No, it doesn't," I admit. "But I've been doing a lot of things that make me uncomfortable recently, this is just part of it. If I want to prove I'm capable of being a leader, then I need to deal with my own problems."

  "I think you'll be an amazing leader," he assures me. "And you're only just getting started."

  "I hope you're right." And I'm determined to prove that he is.

  Chapter Twelve

  I'm getting really tired of being called back and forth to Court. I'm sure it would be easier if I lived in the palace still. But I can't do that. I'm not giving up the education I had to fight for, especially since it's already proved useful with several things when it comes to actually trying to make good decisions.

  "Kayra, good afternoon," Mother says, striding down the corridor towards me.

  "Good afternoon," I respond as politely as possible.

  "Walk with me," she says, gesturing to the front door.

  I nod and follow her outside. Does this mean the conversation she wants to have is too explosive for her office?

  I push the thought aside. She probably wants to take advantage of the good weather. I know I do.

  We step outside and walk down the path, neither of us saying a word. I hate waiting for whatever she's going to say, but I know better than to start the conversation myself.

  "You're being formally betrothed to Jeremy," she announces.

  "What?" I demand, forgetting all attempts at being polite. "I can't do that."

  "You will do that."

  "No, Mother. I won't. I don't consent to the match." My heart feels as if it's going to explode out of my chest, but I ignore it. That's not a good reason to go along with it.

  "He's your fated mate, Kayra. You will do as you're told," she responds sharply.

  "Really? You're going to try and use that line on me?" My voice squeaks at the end.

  "It's not a line..."

  "I know fated mates aren't real, Mother. I've known since before you introduced me to Jeremy. What I don't know is why you thought that was something you could lie to me about? And how you thought you could tell me someone who I don't have a connection to is my fated mate and have me not notice? Why would you think that's a good idea?" Tears threaten but I keep them away. I won't give her the satisfaction of seeing me cry over all of this, it isn't worth it.

  "Who told you that? They were the ones lying..."

  "I doubt it," I mutter. "But that isn't the point. You either lied to me about fated mates and lied about Jeremy, or you just lied about the fact Jeremy is my fated mate, because the pull you always said I was going to feel when I met the right person isn't there with him."

  She purses her lips.

  This is it. She's not going to give me any explanation for what she did. I'm going to go through the rest of my life without a single clue about any of it.

  "I told you fated mates were real as a way to make sure you didn't do anything stupid," she admits. "Getting pregnant or making connections with the wrong people..."

  A short bitter laugh breaks free from me. "And you thought the best way to stop those things from happening was to lie to me? What about having an open and honest conversation? By most accounts, that would have worked better."

  I seethe, barely containing my anger over the situation. I can't believe what she's saying. It's hard to resist walking away right now.

  "I did what I thought was best," she insists.

  "And now I'm doing the same," I say firmly. "I won't be marrying Jeremy. I'm sorry if that doesn't align with your plan, but right now, I'm not marrying anyone. I'm eighteen years old, the world doesn't expect it of me yet and I'm not going to rush anything just because you want me to."

  When I get married, it's going to be for love. And it definitely won't be when I've only known the person in question for a few weeks. I've known Magnus for longer and I wouldn't marry him at this point. It's a ridiculous notion to say the least, especially given my age.

  "Fine. You don't have to marry Jeremy yet..."

  "I'm not going to marry him at all," I insist. "This is something that's my choice and only on my schedule. If you try to force me through anything like that, I will make a public spectacle and everyone will know that you tried to force me."

  Mother blinks a few times as she stares at me, trying to make sense of what I'm saying. It must be a surprise to her to have me speak back to her, though I did do it the other day. But I'm not the same person who walked into Sabre Woods Academy.

  And I haven't been the little girl who hung onto her every word for a long time. She's broken my trust many times over and I've finally learned to put a stop to it.

  "Next time you want a meeting with me, please send an agenda in advance," I say firmly.

  I wait a moment for her to respond. When she doesn't, I turn on my heels and storm towards the gate that'll take me to the train. I can be back at the academy in an hour and away from this nonsense.

  A small part of me wants to give myself time to cool off before I head back, but I don't want to risk running into Jeremy and having to make small talk after I've just told Mother I won't marry him.

  He probably doesn't even know what's happened. It seems that if there's one person who has even less say in this than me, it's him.

  I feel sorry for him more than anything else.

  Hmm. Maybe it would be good to run into him so I can fill him in on everything that's happened. But I don't want to head back into the palace.

  I pull my phone out of my pocket and hit the dial button on his number before I think twice about it.

  "Kayra?" he asks down the line.

  "Hey. I need to tell you something," I say. I push through the metal gate at the end of the path.

  The train platform is completely empty, which is good for me. Despite my threats to Mother, I don't want word of this to get out. I know how much damage gossip can do.

  "Do you want me to come meet you somewhere?" he asks.

  "No. The phone is fine." I take a deep breath. "Mother told me we were getting married."

  "She did?" A note of hope enters his voice, but it's impossible to miss the confusion too.

  "I told her I wouldn't do that. I don't think I can ever do that. I'm sorry, Jeremy, but I don't feel that way about you."

  "Maybe it will come with time," he says.

  "I'm sorry, I don't think it will. I like you as a person and you're a good friend, but I don't see us as a good romantic fit."

  Magnus springs to mind as I think about that. I don't want to waste any more time. He's the one I want to be with, even if I've accidentally messed it up already."

  Jeremy sighs down the line. "I expected it. I'm sorry the Queen has pushed you this far."

  "Don't be. It's not your fault. I'm sure you'll find someone amazing one day."

  "I doubt I'll find anyone who rivals you."

  I laugh nervously and rub my free hand down my skirt. "I promise you will."

  "Maybe, I'll guess time will tell," he says.

  The line crackles as a lump forms in my throat. "It will," I assure him. "I'm really sorry."

  "Don't be. I understand you're not attracted to me like that. But I do want you to know you've still got my support."

  "Thank you, Jeremy. That means the world to me."

  "I'll see you around, Kayra."

  "See you around," I repeat back to him.

  The line clicks.

  I take a deep breath. This isn't how I expected today to go, but it feels as if a big weight has been lifted from me.

  Maybe now I have a chance at sorting out the rest of my life.

  Starting with Magnus.

  I pull up our message chain and type quickly.

  Can you meet me in my room? Heading back from the palace now.

  I hit send before I can overthink it. All I've been able to think about since I told him there couldn't be anything between us is how much I want that to change.

  So now I'm going to do something about it.

  Chapter Thirteen

  My heart skips a beat in the good way when I enter the corridor with my dorm room on it to find Magnus leaning against the wall.

  "Hey," I say, a smile lighting up my face and my words.

  "Hi." He grins back at me, clearly as pleased to see me as I am him. "No Demi?"

  "No."

  "You didn't want to talk to her about what happened at the palace?"

  "I do. But telling her can wait. Talking to you is more important right now."

  "Why do I get a bad feeling about this," he jokes. "Did your mother tell you to marry Jeremy or something?"

  I raise an eyebrow.

  "She did?" He whistles. "Wow, I didn't see that one coming."

  "You kind of did," I point out.

  He chuckles awkwardly. "All right, yes I did."

  I slip the key into the door and twist it before pushing it open and gesturing for him to come through.

  He sits down on the bed without needing any prompting. I like that. It shows he's comfortable here.

  I sit down next to him and sigh loudly.

  "She told me I had to marry him."

  "What did you say?"

  "What do you think I said?"

  "Well, I hope you said no."

  "I did. And threatened to make a big deal about it if she forced me," I admit.

  "Do you think she would?"

  "Honestly? I don't know. This is someone who lies to me because she thought it would be easier to deal with me." I shrug as if it's not a big deal. But it is. I'm still hurting even from thinking about that.

  "I'm sorry."

  "Don't be. I feel better for telling her no," I admit. "And after I'd done that, I called Jeremy."

  "Okay..."

  "And I told him that I couldn't marry him. He was a little surprised about that considering he had no idea it could happen."

  "But he took it well?"

  "As well as anyone can. I doubt many people like being told someone doesn't like them like that and doesn't think they ever can."

  "You told him that?"

  "I did."

  "Why?"

  "Because I like someone else like that," I whisper.

  Taking a chance, I shuffle in closer to him. Our knees brush and I reach out for his hand, threading my fingers through his.

  Our gazes lock and he reaches out with the hand I'm not holding, leaving it hanging in the air between us.

  "Can I kiss you?" he asks.

  "Please."

  Relief fills his eyes, and a smile breaks out over his lips. He touches my cheek and strokes it with a thumb.

  He leans in, closing the distance between us.

  My eyes flutter closed as I feel the anticipation build. I know we've kissed before, but somehow, this feels different. More intense.

  His lips brush against mine, sending shivers down my spine.

  I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss. Nothing else matters in this moment. It's all about the two of us and the connection we seem to have built between one another without even really trying.

  In a lot of ways, this is better than what I always imagined kissing my mate would feel like. It takes me a moment to realise why.

  Choice.

  We're not doing this because the universe thinks we're a perfect fit. We're doing it because we think we could be good together. It makes it even more special. And better than I ever thought.

  The two of us break apart, each of us with a slightly dazed expression on our faces.

  I clear my throat, trying to think of the right words to say but not finding any. How can I put what I just felt into a sentence?

  "What's that?" Magnus asks, his voice hoarse from our kiss. He leans down and picks up whatever it is he's seen.

  He holds it out to me, and a small smile spreads across my face. "It's a wish bracelet."

  "Why is it on the floor?"

  "It must have fallen off." I reach out and touch my wrist, unsurprised to find it bare.

  "Is that supposed to happen?"

  I nod. "When my wish comes true."

  "Oh. Did it?"

  "That depends."

  "On?"

  "What that kiss meant," I admit. I wait for the onslaught of nerves as he processes what I've said, but it doesn't come. It's almost like even the most unsure part of me is certain about Magnus.

  "What do you want it to mean?"

  "Please don't play this game with me, Magnus," I warn.

  He winces. "I'm sorry. I didn't think."

  "It's fine."

  "I want you to be my girlfriend. That's what the kiss means."

  My heart flutters, but the nerves stay away, making it easy to answer. "That's what it meant to me too," I assure him.

  Relief crashes over his face. "For a moment, I thought you were going to reject me like you did Jeremy."

  I chuckle. "I don't think it counts as rejection if he never asked me anything himself," I point out.

  "You may have a point there. But I'm sure that's not what it feels like to him right now. Especially when you're here with me."

  "He isn't aware of that," I point out. "I didn't tell him anything about my plans. They weren't his to know about."

  "That's fair. I don't think I'd want to know if you'd been going to see him tonight."

  "You know it was never a competition, right?" I check.

  "Logically, yes. Illogically, definitely not."

  "Men." I shake my head in bemusement.

  Magnus shrugs. "You're beautiful with a kind heart. Anyone would want to be with you, they'd be crazy not to. I'm sure he wants you to like him like that."

  "But I don't."

  "I know."

  "I like you like that."

  "You made that obvious." He grins widely. "I enjoyed the demonstration."

  "Good, because I plan to give you more."

  He raises an eyebrow.

  "I'm sorry, I'm not sure why I'm suddenly so forward."

  "It suits you."

  "I'm probably still on a high telling Mother no, there was something surprisingly intoxicating about it," I admit.

  "That's to be expected when she's been keeping the truth from you so much."

  I nod and bite my lip.

  "So, did you get your wish?" he asks, holding up the broken wish bracelet.

  "I did if you kiss me again," I say.

  "You wished I'd kiss you twice?"

  "I wished there could be something between us."

  "You're the one who put us on hold," he points out.

  "I know. But I hope things will be a lot more manageable when it comes to my duties at Court and I can have more time for my academy work and for you."

  "I can help you with the academy work too," he promises. "Especially if that's a way I can spend more time with you."

  I chuckle. "Is that why you keep coming over with food?"

  "A small one. But I really did mostly just wanted to support you when you needed it."

  "I appreciate that. But now I have some other plans for you."

  "Boyfriend plans?"

  "Definitely." I place a hand on his cheek and lean in so I'm the one who initiates this kiss.

  I need him to know how much I want this.

  He kisses me back instantly, snaking an arm around my waist and pulling me closer.

  A feeling I've never felt before travels through me, a need I didn't know I had. I want to be closer to him.

  I start to lean back, pulling him with me.

  "Kayra," he says, my name something between a plea and a warning.

  I end the kiss and search his face for the answer.

  "Not yet," he whispers.

  "But..."

  "We've been dating for all of five minutes. We're not rushing this. I don't want us to rush into this and then for you to regret it later." The seriousness on his face is impossible to ignore.

 

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