As Lauren climbed the stairs, she was again reminded that Jonathan Michaels was first and foremost a spy. And that meant he knew how to keep secrets. Something she didn’t want from a mate.

  The man drummed his fingers on the desk. “Have you discovered where she is?” he asked Parker.

  “No.” Parker didn’t like the look in the other man’s eyes. “She was there this morning at ten. I went to her flat under the pretext of asking how she felt after her breakup with Donald. She seemed upset and said she wanted to be alone to think.”

  “So you left her?”

  “There wasn’t much I could do and not make her suspicious.” Parker paced before the large desk. “I mean, I couldn’t barge into her apartment and demand that she tell me if she knew where Greg Williams was.”

  “So where the hell is she at this moment?”

  Parker flinched at the other man’s deadly, cold tone. “I don’t know. I checked her restaurant. She’s been there every day since she recovered from her husband’s death. Nothing has kept her away.”

  “So why do you think she’s missing now? Do you think Greg Williams made the connection between the thefts?”

  He shook his head. “Even the inventor doesn’t know how the system was split up.”

  “But our little Texas girl saw my shopping list. Maybe she and Greg Williams put it together.”

  “How?” Parker sat in the overstuffed wing chair. “Only ONI knew where the parts were, and the only guy here in London who knew that information was Ted Anderson. He doesn’t remember me studying his plans, because he was passed out from the drug I gave him. He thought he’d come down with a bad case of the flu.”

  The fingers tapped an ominous rhythm on the desk. “Our profitable days may be at an end if we don’t eliminate Greg Williams. He hasn’t made you yet, but I think the longer he’s out there, the better his chances are of fingering you.”

  “So how am I to discover where he is?”

  “I think the way to get to him is through Lauren.”

  “What’s your plan?”

  A deadly smile curved the man’s lips. “We harm her baby. A kitchen fire will flush our Lauren out. And when she surfaces, I’ll bet Greg will soon follow.”

  “Where are you?” Diamond asked.

  “The Black Horse Inn, Exeter. Did you find out any information about Alfred Fox?”

  “Yes. He’s an English scientist who teaches at the University of Glasgow and works for Teltex. Their research labs are there.”

  “Teltex. That file was clean but I think part of it was missing from the disk you sent.”

  “I copied those files straight off the embassy computer.”

  “Which means, I think, our mole got to the information before you sent it. Damn.” Where did they go now? “Maybe I could talk to the professor and get some information. What’s his address?”

  “He’s on vacation in New Zealand but he was due back today.”

  “It’s worth a try.”

  Diamond gave him the Glasgow address.

  “Who in the Office of Naval Intelligence decided to parcel out each part of the system?” Jon asked.

  “I knew you were going to ask that.”

  “Our leak might be there.”

  A deep sigh rumbled out of Diamond’s throat. “I’ll have to call in several promises to discover that.”

  “But you can do it. I have another question relating to the radar system. Do you know what part each manufacturer got?” Something told Jon that piece of information was important.

  “Let me see.” Jon heard the rustle of papers. “Here it is. Orley had the base. Simon-Ray had the trigger. Engles Tool had what was termed ‘the red,’ and finally Jensen Brothers had the code.”

  Jon visualized the list and each component. “Okay. I’ll call tomorrow when I get to Glasgow. See if you can pave the way for me to talk to the professor.”

  As Jon climbed the stairs to the room, he wondered if the guy in ONI might be their leak. Before he’d been reassigned to London, he and Diamond had checked out the personnel at the embassy. In the CIA section, five people, Parker among them, were the same as when he was there three years ago. Four new people had come with him in the new rotation.

  On that fateful day three years ago, Jon had signed out, stating only that he was meeting Bright Eyes. Anyone in the department could have read the sign-out sheet. But to discover where he was going, they would’ve had to talk to the communications officer to see if a neutral third party had been contacted to arrange a meeting place. Unfortunately the communications officer who had sent the message died in a car accident two weeks after Jon had his near fatal accident. That left him and Diamond shooting in the dark, wondering if any of the five men had talked to the communications officer.

  But Jon didn’t believe any of them was the mastermind behind the ROSES spy ring. They were all too mild-mannered and “proper.” That’s why he thought the guy in ONI might be their man.

  He paused at the top of the stairs. His legs were throbbing with the effort it took to climb a simple flight of steps. He struggled down the hall, grateful there were no witnesses to see his limp. Stopping before his and Lauren’s room, he knocked softly. Immediately the door opened.

  “Was your boss in?” Lauren asked once he was inside. “And what did he tell you?”

  Jon sat on the love seat and began to knead his aching knee. “The man who invented the system lives in Glasgow. He’s been off in New Zealand vacationing but was due back today. I think it would be worth our while to go question him. We could drive there—”

  The muscle in his thigh contracted into a tight ball. He gritted his teeth against the pain as his fingers dug into the muscle. “Damn leg,” he grumbled.

  “Let me,” she said, kneeling before him. Gently brushing away his hands, she began to knead his thigh. Jon didn’t know if it was more pain or pleasure to have her hands on him. And there was definitely a lot of pain.

  Finally, after what seemed like hours, the muscle relaxed. His head rolled back on the couch cushions. Her fingers stilled.

  “Are you all right?” Her voice was like chimes on the wind.

  The heat from her palms seeped through the fabric of his pants, firing his already smoldering desire into a roaring flame. He placed his hand over one of hers. She went still, suddenly aware, he was sure, of the position of her fingers high on his thigh.

  “If you’re asking if I survived the cramp, I did. If you’re asking if I’ll survive having your hands on me, the answer is no. I’ll die a happy man.”

  She tried to jerk her captured hand free, but he wouldn’t release her. He opened his eyes, and his free hand caught her chin.

  “Lauren, lieveling, I want you. I want to bury myself in your warmth and have it drive away the chill from my soul.”

  “Don’t do this to me, Jon,” she whispered brokenly.

  “Why, Lauren? Why?”

  “You know why.”

  Indeed he did. He knew that there were hurts and issues that she wanted resolved. But he also knew that the bond between them had been weakened by what had occurred. That bond needed to be strengthened if they were going to make it. She was his, dammit, and he’d use any means, do anything to make sure it stayed that way.

  His knuckles brushed over her cheek. “When I make love to you, I know that there is still hope and beauty in this world.” She needed words, so he’d give them to her. He leaned forward, bringing his mouth inches from hers. “But more than that, I want to give you a taste of paradise that I experience each time we are together.”

  A moan emerged from her throat, and she closed her eyes. At that instant he knew she’d surrendered to him, but he didn’t like the feel of this victory, didn’t want to think about the underhanded method he’d used to win her. Instead, his mouth covered hers, devouring hers, as if he were a starving man tasting his first food.

  His tongue invaded her mouth, dueling with hers, caressing the slick inside surfaces. Her fingers dug into his arms, trying to draw him closer. He pulled her up onto the sofa and over him as he lay back.

  He searched her eyes, looking for confirmation that she wanted this as much as he did and found an answering hunger in her. “Do you want this?” he asked, his voice dark with desire.

  Lauren felt every inch of his hard frame under hers. The resolve that she had worked so hard to build melted under the heat of his touch. The pull of her flesh was stronger than the pull of her brain.

  “Do you want this?” he asked again.

  She realized that he wasn’t going to allow her to claim afterward that he had coerced her. He may have thought he had outmaneuvered her, but Lauren knew that although her body wanted this, she didn’t have to lay her heart open to him. She could divorce that part of her from this lovemaking. “Yes.”

  His mouth captured hers, pulling her down into his churning passion. Somehow her blouse and bra disappeared, and his shirt was opened so her tender breasts were pressed into the soft hair of his chest.

  His kisses demolished the last of her resolve, and she plunged gladly into the world of feeling that he offered.

  “I’m not going to make it to the bed,” he whispered in her ear.

  “Then we’ll have to make do here, won’t we?” she answered, releasing him from his pants. He didn’t bother trying to take her skirt off. Instead, he reached underneath and pulled her panties down her legs. When he entered her, Lauren felt every nerve in her body cry out in delight.

  His eyes locked with hers as he began to move with her. When she reached the heights and shattered into a million color-filled pieces, he was with her.

  She collapsed on his chest. Listening to the rapid beating of his heart, Lauren realized that she’d been dead wrong. She couldn’t divorce her heart from her body.

  Chapter 11

  Jon’s hand lightly caressed the skin of Lauren’s back. “Why did you try to keep part of yourself from me?” he softly asked.

  She wasn’t ready to face this just yet. “What are you talking about?”

  He pulled away from her and gazed down into her eyes. “I take back what I’ve said. You’d make a lousy spy, because you can’t lie worth a damn.”

  She scrambled off him and reached for her blouse. He captured her wrist, stopping her.

  “Why, Lauren? Why did you do it?”

  “I was only trying to follow your lead. After all, we’ve made love countless times before, yet you kept a part of yourself hidden from me. Never once, Jon, did you give your entire self to me.” A sob caught in her throat. “So you have no reason to complain when I try to do the same thing. The only difference between us was I wasn’t successful.”

  He released her wrist, and she pulled her blouse modestly across her chest.

  “How did you do it, Jon? How did you keep a part of yourself locked away from me?”

  He pulled back as if she’d slapped him. He zipped his pants and reached for his shirt but encountered her panties instead. He handed them to her.

  “Why don’t you take a shower while I’m gone, then go on to bed,” he said, retrieving his shirt.

  “Where are you going?”

  His gaze clashed with hers. “I don’t know.”

  The pain from the wound he just opened caused her to gasp. Something flashed in his eyes. It could’ve been regret. He didn’t stay long enough for her to know. Grabbing his cane, he silently left the room. When the door clicked closed behind him, Lauren gave in to the tears clogging her throat.

  How could anything so beautiful and earth-shattering disappear so quickly? And how had things disintegrated so fast?

  He’d been right in his accusation. She had tried to be dishonest with him, as well as with herself. She’d been trying to live by another’s standard, and it hadn’t worked. A bitter laugh escaped her lips. Hadn’t worked was a bit of an understatement. Miserable failure more accurately described it.

  On wooden legs she walked to the bathroom. As she stood under the spray of hot water, Lauren realized that if she was going to survive emotionally, she would have to stop playing games and be honest—with herself, with Jon. That meant risking her heart. Could she do it? She honestly didn’t know.

  * * *

  Jon stared down into the tankard of ale on the table before him. He certainly had made of mess of things, hadn’t he? Of all the dumb things, being speared with his own question ranked right up at the top.

  He remembered her saying this morning that she no longer trusted him with her heart. That’s why, when he knew she was trying to keep her heart uninvolved, he had poured all of himself into their lovemaking.

  Taking a large swallow of the bitter brew, he thought it ironic that in trying to ensure she held nothing of herself back, he gave his all. And when Lauren got around to thinking about what just passed between them, she’d discover he hadn’t held anything back.

  His blunder had come when he put his anger into words. But her actions had enraged him. What he should’ve done was keep his stupid mouth shut. Now all he had were fresh wounds he’d inflicted on himself and Lauren. It was a rotten way to end the night.

  “Are you wanting another drink before I close the bar?” the bartender asked him.

  More alcohol wouldn’t change a thing. All it would do was dull his reflexes, and he was in enough hot water now to boil off his skin. “No.”

  He downed the last of the ale and headed back to the room. Again his leg protested when he climbed the stairs. He paused on the top step, evaluating his performance over the last few days. It was sloppy. He was losing his edge and letting his heart control his head. If he kept it up, it wouldn’t be long before he made a serious blunder and innocent people would probably pay for his mistake.

  As he unlocked the door to their room, the thought occurred to him yet again that maybe it was time to quit.

  Lauren heard the key in the lock. She tensed as the door swung open. After showering and slipping into her gown and robe, she had decided that it would be best for all if she slept on the love seat. She’d pulled the pillow and bedspread from the bed and curled up on the love seat with them. She’d left the lamp on the nightstand burning.

  “Lauren?” There was a note of alarm in his quiet voice. “Lauren, where are you?”

  She sat up. “I’m here.”

  His shoulders slumped in relief. “What are you doing over there?”

  “Sleeping.”

  The subtle change in his posture warned Lauren of his coming anger. “Get back in bed.” His words were so hard and cold that they could’ve cut diamonds.

  Suddenly her earlier actions seemed childish, and she wanted to explain them to him. “I thought that it might make things easier.”

  “Get in bed, Lauren. I might be an idiot, but I’m not a rapist.”

  A wealth of hurt lay buried in his words, and Lauren couldn’t ignore them. “It wasn’t you I was afraid of.”

  His eyes closed, and he leaned back against the door. “Thank you.”

  She gathered up the pillow and bedspread and padded across the room. The bulky spread caught her foot, and she stumbled sideways. Jon stepped forward and tried to steady her, but he stepped out on his bad leg. She heard him curse as his knee gave out, and they both stumbled into the mattress. They landed in a jumble of arms and legs.

  Lauren stared into his dazed eyes. This falling together was becoming a real “thing” with them. Suddenly it seemed hilarious to her. “At least we didn’t end up on the floor this time,” she said, trying to hold back her chuckles.

  His mouth twitched. She gave him an answering grin. Then a giggle escaped her lips.

  “I guess my technique isn’t quite as polished as it used to be,” he said.

  “But it gets my attention in a very efficient manner,” she answered between laughs.

  “Yeah, but it’s murder on my ribs.”

  After their laughter died down, he threaded his fingers through hers and brought her hand to his lips.

  “Lauren, I—”

  Suddenly she didn’t want to hear what he had to say. She feared his words. Her heart couldn’t take any more disappointment or disillusionment. “Don’t, Jon.” She laid her fingers across his mouth to stop his words. “There will be time enough tomorrow to say what we need to.”

  He thought over her proposal, then nodded. Lauren breathed a sigh of relief, but she knew they were simply postponing the moment of reckoning, not eliminating it.

  Lauren woke several hours later. She glanced around, wondering what had drawn her from sleep. Jon’s side of the bed was empty. Her fingers ran over the place where he had been. The mattress still held the warmth of his body, so he couldn’t have left the bed too long ago.

  The disturbing thought popped into her brain that after only a couple of days back with Jon, her body was so in tune to his that the lack of his warmth woke her. She was in major-league trouble here.

  Scanning the room, she saw Jon sitting on the love seat. He was working on the laptop, and the light from the screen was like a beacon, drawing her. She slipped on her robe and joined him on the love seat.

  “What are you doing?” she asked sleepily.

  “I wanted to enter the information Diamond told me into the files while I was thinking about it.” He glanced at her. “Earlier I got sidetracked.”

  It was easier to skim over that point. “What information did he give you?”

  “You remember the four companies working on the radar system?”

  She nodded.

  “Well, he gave the individual part that each company produced.”

  She rested her head on the back of the love seat. “Did it help? Give you any insight?”

  “It’s been like everything else in this investigation— information that leads nowhere.”

  “Mmm.” Her eyes fluttered closed.

  “Go back to bed, Lauren. We’ve a long way to drive tomorrow.”

  Her head came up and she stared at him. “Drive?”

  “You remember I told you that the professor was due back from his vacation?”

 

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