Hunters descent, p.23
Hunter's Descent, page 23
It was no wonder she was having trouble. She’d killed what was essentially a packmate, after all. Sure, she’d done it to save her sister, but Ruri knew from her own experience how much that hurt.
Poor Josephus hadn’t seen it coming. He hadn’t been in his right mind for days. Rabies was a hell of a disease to the wolven, much closer to how it progressed in animals than among humans. He couldn’t have been allowed to infect anyone else in the pack, and it had been one of Ruri’s first jobs to carry out as Dean’s newly-minted Beta. She’d kept to fur-form for days afterward, in constant physical contact with others of the pack before she and the wolf had recovered some semblance of their old selves.
She moved her hand to trace the long scar that ran around the bottom of her ribcage on the right side and stopped. Instead of the ropey sliver of rough skin, her fingers encountered only smoothness. Ruri lifted her other hand to feel for the notch on her ear, but it was also gone. She bounded off the bed and in front of the mirror, opening her shirt as she moved. When she held it open and stared at her reflection, she was astounded to see that her scars had all vanished. Her skin was as flawless as a baby’s.
Ruri stared, unable to believe that all the reminders of previous fights and scrapes were gone. Some of those scars had been a part of her for over a hundred years. Her breaths came fast and shallow around the hollowness in her chest. Losing them hurt as much as losing the tintype of her family. Without the scars to remind her, how many memories would fade? The skin on her shoulder itched. It was there that she’d been bitten by the wolven who’d turned her.
Jens Hagen had shown up at their farm one autumn afternoon and had talked her parents into having a photograph taken of the family, then had stayed the night with them. In the morning, they’d risen to find the first snowfall of the season had snowed them in. He stayed a few days until a thaw had cleared the road enough that he was able to get his wagon out of the barn. Despite the snow still clogging the roads and her hints that he could stay longer, he’d left.
To this day, Ruri still didn’t know what had compelled her to follow him. Maybe it had been the argument she’d had with her mother about why she wouldn’t consider going courting with the miller’s boy. Or why she hadn’t been interested in the son of the farmer to their west. Or any of the boys who had come to call. Maybe it had been the stories he’d told about the places he’d been and the people he’d talked to. Whatever it was, she’d snuck out of the house after everyone had fallen asleep and tracked him to his campsite. It was a simple task in the snow under the light of the full moon, and she wasn’t slowed down by having to guide a wagon through the drifts.
She still remembered the way his small camp was set up, with the campfire next to the wagon, and the horses on the opposite side, away from the fire’s heat. She remembered thinking that was strange, but then she’d been distracted by Jens stripping off his clothes next to the fire and dropping to his hands and knees. The flesh on his back had rippled and fur had come bursting through it in clumps. To her, it had looked as if his skin had melted away to reveal the massive wolf within him. Fear had frozen her to the spot, until the wolf had looked up with his molten gold eyes and held her gaze. And then she was running, but the wolf was in front of her. She tripped over something and fell heavily to the ground. Pain like unceasing fire had lanced through her left shoulder. She passed out and the next morning woke next to the burned-out remnant of the fire. The only sign of the itinerant photographer were wagon tracks in the snow.
She knew the legends. The next month had been spent eking out a living in the woods, and when she blacked out during its full moon, she knew what she’d become. The last time she’d seen any of her family had been when she crept back into the house and stole the tintype Jens had taken of them.
But she hadn’t been alone. The sister of her soul had taken up residence. The wolf was with her from then on. Until now that was.
Ruri went back to the bed. Carefully, so as not to wake her mate, she pulled each item of conjured clothing off Mal. Each piece disappeared into a shimmer in the air and a drift of fine powder that floated away, leaving Billy’s original components behind. All of Mal’s scars were gone as well. She studied her mate for a while longer, then covered the sleeping Mal with blankets and slipped from the room.
Corrigan’s door was down the hall. At least it had been the last time. Ruri hesitated in front of it for a moment, then knocked on it before she could lose her nerve. There was no answer. Ruri turned to leave then heard the latch click. The door opened and the sheriff stood in front of her. She was dressed in her uniform and looked human. In her hands was a light tan campaign hat. She ran her fingers nervously along the leather band above the brim.
“What is it, Ruri?” Corrigan asked. Her voice was almost monotone. She blinked up at Ruri.
“My scars are gone,” Ruri said, feeling foolish.
“Did you take a healing potion? One that made you feel really good?”
“Yes, after the hodag hunt.”
“Well, there’s your answer. That particular tincture heals all wounds completely. How else do you think we can look so good for so long?” Corrigan’s lips twisted in disgust as she gestured to herself.
“Are you all right?” Ruri asked. “What happened in the hall was rough.”
“Rough.” Corrigan barked out a sharp laugh. “That’s one way to put being stripped of your rank and title and being humiliated in front of the entire court.” She shook her head. “You might as well come in. This isn’t a conversation I want to have where unseen ears might catch it.”
Ruri thought about declining the invitation, but only for a second. “Why talk to me about any of it?”
“Why not?” Corrigan lifted one shoulder. “It’s not like you’ll tell anyone, not with what I know about you. The only people I can talk to here will either tell tales to curry favor or will be in trouble when someone assumes they know something and tries to extract it from them.” She crossed over to a large chair and collapsed into it, throwing her hat down on the table. “Being the heir is incredibly difficult, but the realm needs one. What Connall has done is insanely dangerous, almost as dangerous as naming the Jaeger as his heir would be. Even that is only a matter of time, I fear.”
“He doesn’t seem to have the needs of his people in mind,” Ruri said. In broad strokes, she filled Corrigan in on what had happened during the hunt for the hodag and Trajan’s death.
“That’s no surprise,” the sheriff said. “It’s how the Wild Hunt has operated for millennia, but they only used to ride in the mortal world. It’s been over the past century that they’ve been confined Underhill. They have yet to adapt.”
“I don’t really see how it’s better that they used to do that in our world.”
“It isn’t.” Corrigan waved a hand wearily. “A lot of people here see it that way, though. They don’t realize that the more we keep to the old ways, the more chance there is we’ll be discovered. We won’t survive that, not in any meaningful way.” She blew out a long breath. “The Jaeger is all about the old ways. He wants to take the Wild Hunt out in your world again. He wants to cleanse what he considers undesirable elements.”
“Humans?”
“Partly, though there aren’t many around here.”
“Who lives in La Pointe, then?”
“There are humans there, but the population is mostly fae in human guise and those of mixed blood. He’s not very fond of those, but he dislikes the fae from further abroad even more.”
Ruri shook her head. This crash course in fae politics had started a dull throb behind her left eye. “So he’s okay with humans.”
“As long as they’re claimed by one of the Old World fae.”
“And half-fae are all right.”
“If one parent is an Old World fae. In his view they have at least some of the proper blood in them.”
“But he doesn’t like fae who…what?”
Corrigan smiled a bitter half-smirk. “He doesn’t like fae who don’t come from Europe. Those from Asia are barely tolerated. Those from Africa and the New World should never have come here. There are those in the court who label them Unseleighe. They call them dark and unclean and twist the original meaning of the word until it means something far different than it used to.”
“Well, that’s comforting.”
“What is?”
“Knowing that you graceful, high and mighty fae have raving racists in your ranks also.” Ruri grinned. “It’s a little comforting to know racism isn’t something humans have a lock on. It’s also good to know your racists have the same logical issues ours do. How can the fae from here go back where they came from?”
“I think he would have more use for them if they’d done what was expected of them, but when they wanted to stay their own people and not become a serving-class for ours, he lost interest. You probably won’t be surprised to hear the king shares many of his views.” Corrigan shook her head. “I thought I could be a moderating influence on him, but as his grasp on this world weakens, the Jaeger has only gained more influence. Part of him still realizes the Jaeger as King Under Hill would be disastrous, which is why Connall didn’t name him Heir tonight. I think. It’s possible he’s doing something tricky. It would have been like him a hundred years ago. Now I fear he’s simply forgotten he needs an heir so this realm doesn’t crumble to nothing if he dies.”
“That’s depressing.”
“Isn’t it? And I’m suddenly in a position to do very little about it.” She picked up the hat and crammed it on her head. “But at least I can do my best to keep humans from noticing when our little world crumbles from within and explodes out into theirs.” She stood. “I need to get back to work. I’ll be back on occasion. If I disappear from court completely, the Jaeger will be free to do what he wants. The king still listens to me. Sometimes.”
Ruri got up out of her chair. “So what do we do in the meantime?”
“Keep trying to figure out a way to get the king’s favor and get out of here. If you can find a way to do that without the Jaeger’s help, take it.” Corrigan tugged at the bottom of her uniform shirt to straighten it. “Talk to Billy or Andra if you need me, but it had better be an emergency.”
“Okay. Good luck, Reese.”
The sheriff smiled at Ruri’s use of her first name. “And to you. You need it more than I do.”
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Mary Alice cracked open one eye and blinked. Why was the room in shades of grey? She focused on Ruri’s hair, spread out across the pillow in front of her face. No, not shades of grey, but everything looked washed out, nothing like the vibrant shades she’d seen last night.
Last night… She’d had a lot of fun, she could remember that much, but the particulars were choppy as if all she had to go on were photos of an event someone had snapped occasionally throughout the evening. There was a lot of dancing, some drinking. She smacked her lips at the remembered taste of a fizzy beverage. She wouldn’t mind getting some of that again.
An argument. Had there been an argument or some sort of fight? The only image she could remember had to do with a man falling through the sky. That couldn’t be right, could it? Mary Alice shifted, trying to get past the disturbing memory fragment.
Stiletto. She froze in the bed. Somehow, the squadmate she’d killed had figured into last night’s events. That wasn’t good. She tried not to move. She barely breathed as she sorted through the jumbled snapshots that were her previous night’s memories.
There it was. Ruri and her, back in the hall, heading to their room. She was in tears and confessing all to Ruri, who was… Who was what? Had she been angry? Disappointed? Disgusted? She should have been all those things. Lord knew Mary Alice was.
She reached out a hand toward her girlfriend, needing to feel her, to steal some comfort before Ruri woke up and faced the mess that was the woman she called her mate. The thing that wasn’t worthy of someone like Ruri.
Tears dripped off the end of her nose to land on the pillow with distinct plopping sounds. Ruri stirred, then turned over, reaching out to Mary Alice before she opened her eyes.
“Oh, sweetie,” she said, her voice gravelly from sleep. She pulled Mary Alice into her arms, hooking one leg over her hip, molding them together down the entire length of their bodies. Neither of them wore a stitch of clothing.
Ruri’s warmth seeped into her, chasing the tension from her muscles. She relaxed into her girlfriend’s embrace, feeling at peace for the first time in months. Ruri rested her chin on top of Mary Alice’s head. They lay there together for long minutes. Mary Alice was content to bask in her company. She was almost lulled back to a doze by the steady rise and fall of Ruri’s chest. All the while, tears streamed down her face.
“So…” Mary Alice finally said. “I guess the hug means you don’t hate me?”
“Of course I don’t hate you.” Ruri tightened her grip. “I take it you don’t remember much from last night.”
“Not really. Remind me to stay away from that stuff. I enjoyed it a little too much, I think.” She sighed. It had felt amazing to get out from under all her cares, but chasing that kind of oblivion had done incredible damage to many in her cohort. It had led to the deaths of more than one, if indirectly.
“I can do that,” Ruri said. “If that’s what you want.”
“It is.”
“Then I’ll remind you of that when you snap at me for it.”
Mary Alice smiled. “I know you will. I like that you don’t take my crap.”
“Oh, I’ll take it if I earned it, but I learned a long time ago not to take shit that isn’t mine.”
“I bet. So what did I tell you, exactly?”
“Not much, but enough, I think.” Ruri paused before continuing. “You said Stiletto got knocked out in the fight and you finished the job before she could regain consciousness.”
“That’s about the size of it.” Mary Alice sighed. “I didn’t think it would bother me this much. I did it for Cassidy, which isn’t as comforting as it should be.”
“It’s good that you’re bothered by it,” Ruri said slowly, picking each word with extreme care. “You worry about being a monster. If this didn’t upset you, I think you’d be a lot closer to being one, no matter what kind of DNA you’ve got floating around in there.”
“I should have been better. I should have figured out a way.”
Ruri laughed, an incredulous edge to her amusement. “You were in a pretty textbook impossible situation. If someone gave a class on impossible choices, you and Cassidy’s pictures would be front and center on the assigned reading.”
“But—”
“But nothing. You made it out with Cassidy. You kept me alive. You took down MacTavish and helped free a dozen or more wolven from him. Yes, Stiletto didn’t make it. Because you chose your family and mine. If that makes you a monster, then I’m one too, because I don’t know that I could have made a different decision under those circumstances.”
“You wouldn’t have killed a packmate.” Mary Alice knew Ruri would have found some way, any way, around it. “You would have figured it out.”
“Maybe,” Ruri allowed, “but the big difference would have been that I would have had support. You were on your own and still had the wherewithal to recognize you were in over your head. Without that, Cassidy would be dead. No, the reason Stiletto died is because your government brought you together as a pack and then destroyed your bonds. If the blame lies with anyone, it’s with Uncle Ralph and the rest of those assholes. The only way out of an impossible decision is different choices. More voices. And they made damn sure that was never going to happen.”
“If you say so.” It made sense, but how much of that was because Mary Alice desperately wanted forgiveness for what she’d done, even if she didn’t deserve it?
“I do say so, and it is so.” Ruri held her back far enough to look Mary Alice in the eyes. “I fell for you because of the way you’re bloody well going to protect those who belong to you. I’ve watched as you try to gather your pack and see it safe. I love you, Mal. I love you because you work so hard to build the bonds that were torn away from you, that keep being torn from you. And no matter how hard it is, you keep fighting for them. For me.” Tears ran down Ruri’s face now too. “For us. Even as you push me away, you pull me back in. That’s not what being a monster is.” She shrugged, then sniffled. “How can I not love you?”
“Oh, Ruri.” Mary Alice ran her thumb under Ruri’s left eye, then her right. The gesture did little to staunch the flow of tears. “I love you, too. It’s impossible not to. You’re the only one who could take what I did and figure out how to keep me from wallowing in it.”
“Does this mean you’ll stop trying to push me away?”
“’Fraid so. You’re stuck with me now.”
“Good.” Ruri pulled Mary Alice in for a kiss.
It started out chastely, but it wasn’t long before Mary Alice became aware of Ruri’s bare breasts against her own. Her nipples pebbled, the puckered skin signaling her awareness of her girlfriend’s proximity. Ruri grinned against Mary Alice’s mouth. She bit down on Mary Alice’s lip hard enough to send pleasure pooling in her groin. Mary Alice opened her mouth to moan, but the sound was quickly swallowed by Ruri’s mouth completely covering hers. Ruri’s clever tongue dipped into her mouth, darting against her tongue, teasing it with the tip once, twice, then withdrawing.
Mary Alice became aware of Ruri’s hands in her hair. Ruri clenched her fingers, pulling on the sensitive roots and holding her in place. She kissed Mary Alice until she had no breath left in her, until her mouth had been possessed by Ruri, until Mary Alice had no thoughts except the desire in her belly and the woman holding her firmly in her place.
“Oh god, Ruri,” she gasped when she allowed her to take a full breath.
