All night joes, p.1
All Night Joe's, page 1
All Night Joe’s
Written by
M.A. Williams
Copyright © 2023 M.A. Williams
All rights reserved.
The events depicted in this work are fiction. Any similarities to any persons or events are purely coincidental. The author retains moral rights to this work and all elements within.
Also by M.A. Williams
Screenplays
The Other Woman (2009)
Novels
Beware the Boy: A Life by Misadventure
The Soprano (Book 1 of the Hard Hat Mysteries)
Films
Double Top (2014. Dir. Christopher Bolton)
Podcasts
Better than Super Mario Bros.?
Game of Moans
SM:PD
Who Wins?
Specials
Trouble Brewing
Monday’s Specials:
Tuesday’s Specials:
Wednesday’s Specials:
Thursday’s Specials:
Friday’s Specials:
A Note from the Author
About the Author
Cast List
In order of appearance
Joe Mid-30s, although he looks older and more haggard. Feels as though he carries the weight of the world on his shoulders, and is solely responsible for everything and everyone in it.
Newly-minted co-owner of All Night Joe’s - the only 24-hour coffee shop in the heart of Cardiff’s busy student district.
Jeff Mid-30s. Joe’s best friend since forever. He’s irreverent and carefree - the absolute antithesis of Joe.
Jeff has worked at All Night Joe’s since leaving school at 16, when Joe Sr. offered him a job. He knows everything there is to know about the place.
Annie Late 20s, but far wiser and more mature than her years suggest. Enjoyed a close relationship with her late father.
Newly-minted co-owner of All Night Joe’s - the only 24-hour coffee shop in the heart of Cardiff’s busy student district.
Sarah Early 30s. Always dresses well - picture Cate Beckett in early seasons of Castle. Has the attitude to go with it.
A police officer, as well as the object of Joe’s affections. For what it’s worth, she seems to like him, too. Unless she’s just flirting with him for free coffee…
Magda A homeless immigrant who frequents All Night Joe’s in the evenings, when it gets too cold or wet. Joe frequently gives her free food or coffee.
Luke Walsh A barrel-chested goon. The illegitimate love-child of a WWE Superstar and a Silverback Gorilla.
Jacob Morrison Mid-50s. Greying and noticeably ermine in features. If so inclined, one might wish to call him a Slick Git.
Local “Businessman”.
Caroline Black Television Presenter. Effervescent to the point of annoying. Davina McCall, but more irritating.
Gareth Caroline’s long-suffering camera operator.
Darren Delivery driver
David Late-night customer. On edge. REALLY wants a piece of apple pie.
Kirsty Early 20s. A fresh-faced student, full of enthusiasm and as-yet unbroken by the world. A former employee of All Night Joe’s.
Troy De La Roux Late 20s. A hipster-rock star, lead singer of XXX, and former patron of All Night Joe’s.
Trouble Brewing
FADE IN:
1. INT. COFFEE SHOP - DAY
Close up on a large to-go cup being filled to the brim with frothy, caffeine-based goodness. The Barista is JOE. He finishes up the cup, places a plastic lid tightly on it and deposits it on the side for collection.
JOE
Albers?
A hand shoots up.
ALBERS
Here.
ALBERS steps forward and collects the coffee as Joe lines more up on the counter.
JOE
Anderson?
ANDERSON
Here.
Another hand reaches out and grabs the cup from the counter. This is repeated for the next few names.
JOE
Annheiser?
ANNHEISER
Here.
JOE
Busch?
BUSCH
Here.
JOE
Bueller?
No response. Joe looks up at the busy shop, but nobody is milling around waiting for a drink.
JOE (CONT’D)
Bueller?
Still nothing.
JOE (CONT’D)
Bue-
(beat)
Dammit, Jeff! You're meant to filter out this crap!
Joe takes out his wallet, removes a five and stuffs it into the tip jar as JEFF looks over and laughs.
Along the counter, Jeff is taking orders and handling the money. A CUSTOMER shoves his way through the waiting queue and holds out a mug.
CUSTOMER
You burnt this coffee - it's undrinkable!
Jeff checks the mug - upon inspection it appears to be almost empty.
JEFF
Looks to me like you did okay with it...
CUSTOMER
I want another one. But make it an Espresso this time.
JEFF
Sure thing. Three-fifty.
CUSTOMER
What?
JEFF
The Espresso. It's three-fifty.
CUSTOMER
I'm not paying you again - you screwed up my drink, so you can pay to fix it.
Behind the Customer, a WOMAN WITH CHILD take a spot in line.
JEFF
Here, let me see.
He takes the mug from the Customer, takes a sip then back-washes the coffee back into the mug.
JEFF
Tastes fine to me.
He offers the mug back to the Customer.
CUSTOMER
You- you can't do that!
JEFF
That’s funny, because I think I just did.
CUSTOMER
I want to see the Manager.
JEFF
Of course you do, Karen.
Joe has noticed the scene developing and comes to intervene.
JOE
Is everything alright over here?
CUSTOMER
No it most certainly-
JEFF [INTERRUPTING]
Yeah - just this fucking idiot, trying to bullshit a free Espresso.
Gasps from all around at Jeff's profanity.
CUSTOMER
What did you call me?
JEFF
You heard me.
CUSTOMER
I'll have your job for this!
(To Joe)
I DEMAND that you fire him! Immediately!
JOE
I'm sorry, Sir. Let me get you another coffee. On the house.
JEFF
Fuck that - that’s exactly what he wanted in the first place.
The Woman steps forward to the counter.
WOMAN WITH CHILD
He can't talk like that in front of customers! What if my daughter had heard him?
CHILD (O.C.)
Fuck!
More gasps.
JOE
Ma'am, I'm so sorry. Jeff - apologise.
JEFF
Not a chance.
JOE
I wasn't asking.
CHILD (O.C.)
Fuck!
JEFF
No way - they're just words. Whatever happened to free speech?
JOE
Free speech?
JEFF
Yeah, you know - the inherent human right to voice one's opinion publicly without fear of censorship, persecution or punishment.
JOE
Thanks for the civics lesson. Apologise. Now.
JEFF
Oh come on - it's not like I'm hurting anyone.
CUSTOMER
You say that, but I've drunk your coffee.
JEFF
Oh, fuck you, Pal!
CHILD (O.C)
Fuck!
Joe shakes his head in despair as the assembled customers gasp once more.
CUT TO:
CREDITS
On the chalkboard outside All Night Joe’s at the start of each day are listed the daily specials which start in a neat, clear handwriting that becomes gradually worse throughout the week.
Monday’s Specials:
- Part One: All Night Joe’s
- Part Two: Austerity
Part One: All Night Joe’s
2. EXT. ALL NIGHT JOE’S - 19:45
Establishing shot of All Night Joe’s in all its glory. If you're picturing something in the vein of an Edward Hopper picture, you'd be along the right lines.
3. INT. COFFEE SHOP - CONTINUOUS
JOE and ANNIE enter, dressed in black. JEFF counts out a handful of change and splits it between the cash box and the tip jar. The place is deserted, although there is evidence of customers having recently departed given the detritus left on the tables.
JEFF
How was it?
JOE [Forlorn]
It was a funeral, so, you know…
Annie clears plates and cups from the tables and takes them through to the kitchen.
JEFF
How did she take it?
Joe shrugs.
JOE
I’m still not sure it’s sunk in that he’s dead. Her and the Old Man were pretty close.
He looks around at the empty shop.
JOE
Busy?
Jeff shakes his head, disappointed.
JEFF
One or two - it’s been dead.
(b
Oh, shit! No! I mean-
Joe waves it off as Annie returns from the kitchen with two cups of coffee and hands one each to Joe and Jeff.
JOE
Thanks.
JEFF
Thanks, Annie.
Annie smiles. She crosses the shop, hangs her jacket on a coat stand in the corner and dons an apron.
JEFF
Look, I hate to run out, but do you mind if I take off? My game starts at eight.
JOE
What game?
JEFF
Hockey - it’s the semi-finals tonight.
JOE
I thought only toothless Canadians and failed figure-skaters played hockey?
JEFF
Says the guy who blew tryouts...
ANNIE
Oh, right - your game. I’m sorry, Jeff, I completely forgot. Yes, of course - you go.
JEFF
Are you sure? I don’t mind-
JOE
It’s fine.
Jeff throws back the coffee and winces as the coffee scalds the inside of his mouth and sears his throat as it gushes downwards.
ANNIE
Don’t worry - Kirsty should be here soon.
Joe forces himself to hide a grimace.
JEFF
Thanks. I’ll come right back so you can get home tonight.
Joe points to a stack of leaflets on the counter.
JOE
Take some of those. Maybe ask some of your teammates to stop by once in a while.
(beat)
You think you can get there by eight? You’ll be cutting it close.
JEFF
The bus goes right by there - it’ll be fine.
JOE
You can take the car, if you like.
JEFF
The Prius? Now who’s Canadian? Besides, I’m banned, remember.
Annie laughs as Jeff leaves with a smile on his face. As he reaches the door he stops and turns back to them.
JEFF
Oh, I forgot - some guys were in here earlier asking for you. I told them you weren’t here today, but they said they’d stop by again later.
JOE
Any idea who they were?
JEFF
No, but one of them was huge. Looked like he should've been guarding a bridge or something. Massive arms. Bet he’s hung like a-
JOE [INTERRUPTING]
Alright, thanks. Break a leg.
JEFF
Thanks.
JOE
No, I mean it.
They share a quick smile before Jeff turns to leave.
JEFF
Later, fuck face.
(beat)
Annie.
Jeff leaves. Joe turns to Annie and smiles at her.
JOE
Listen, why don’t you take the night off? I can manage until Kirsty gets in, and Jeff should be back before it gets busy again.
ANNIE
That doesn’t seem very fair.
JOE
It’s fine - you’ve had a long day.
ANNIE
So have you. I know you’re right, but I think I want to be here tonight. It sounds stupid, but being here, it kinda feels like Dad’s close by.
Joe places a hand gently on her shoulder and his tone softens.
JOE
That doesn’t sound stupid at all.
ANNIE
Although, if you don’t mind, I will go home and change. These shoes are killing me.
JOE
Well, if you will wear those damned heels...
Annie smiles.
ANNIE
You sound just like him.
JOE
You go home and change, then come back when you’re ready. If you decide not to come back, that’s fine too.
She leans towards him, gives him a quick kiss on the cheek and takes off the apron.
ANNIE
What would I do without you?
JOE
What are big brothers for?
4. INT. COFFEE SHOP - 20:15
The shop is busy with customers and Joe does a great impression of an octopus; arms at full stretch as he manages the coffee machine and the till at the same time. The line is moving pretty well, considering he's on his own.
His phone beeps on the counter beside him. He picks it up and reads a message from Annie;
“Going to take a bath and ring Mum. Will see you later. Love you x”
Joe turns back to cast an eye over the heaving shop, before letting out a heavy sigh.
JOE
Shit!
Joe puts the phone back down, finishes up the cup on the machine and places a plastic lid tightly on it before depositing it on the side for collection. The name scrawled on the side of the cup in black marker is difficult to make out. Joe strains to read it.
JOE
Primrose?
A quick scan of the room. Nobody moves. He squints harder.
JOE (CONT’D)
Primrose Ever... Everdean?
A hand shoots up in the crowd.
PRIMROSE
I volunteer!
“Primrose” makes her way to the counter, where Joe waits with her coffee. When she arrives, Joe hands it to her.
JOE
You know that stopped being funny like five years ago, right?
Primrose smiles as she takes the coffee from him. He hands her a leaflet for the upcoming student event.
PRIMROSE
What’s this?
JOE
Party on Thursday night. Tell your friends.
PRIMROSE
Will there be free coffee?
JOE
Why don’t you come and find out?
PRIMROSE
Touché...
Primrose heads for the exit. She stops in the doorway and turns to Joe.
PRIMROSE
[Shouts] May the odds be ever in your favour!
Primrose leaves and Joe shakes his head, laughing, as he takes another five from his pocket and slots it into the tip jar.
The next customer is a MAN IN A SUIT. Joe doesn’t look up as he approaches.
JOE
What can I get you?
MAN IN SUIT
A yes.
JOE
Excuse me?
Joe looks up as the man slides a thick A4-sized envelope across the counter to him. At the top of the envelope is the logo of Coffee-a-Go-Go - a local chain.
JOE
Oh, it’s you.
MAN IN SUIT
Busy tonight...
JOE
Glad you noticed - means you’ll understand if I don’t stop to chat.
The man smiles and nods to the envelope.
MAN IN SUIT
Alright, I’ll get out of your hair. Just promise me you’ll think about it.
JOE
Final offer?
MAN IN SUIT
I hope so.
He gives Joe a wink and purloins a small packet of biscuits from the counter as he leaves, tossing a few coins down in their place. Joe nods and waves the next customer forward.
CUT TO:
INT. ALL NIGHT JOE’S - CONTINUOUS
Time-lapse of Joe working his way through the queue until, at last, there is just one customer left.
SARAH is the last in the queue. Joe is busy clearing up a fairly hefty spillage around the coffee machine. As he looks up she points to a poster on the wall, advertising an upcoming student party.
SARAH
It’s not that time again already, is it?
JOE
Best party of the year!
SARAH
I thought they’d only just gone home for the summer. When is it?
JOE
Thursday. You should stop by.
SARAH
I’m supposed to be working, but if it’s quiet I’ll see if I can stop by.
He offers her a smile as he reaches for a takeaway cup.
JOE
The usual?
She offers him a sweet smile as she takes a five from her pocket.
SARAH
Two - Hales will freak if I don’t take one back for him.
(beat)
I like your suit. You going somewhere nice?
JOE
Funeral.
SARAH
Oh...
JOE
We buried my dad this afternoon.
SARAH
Shit, I'm so sorry! I...
JEFF
It's okay.
SARAH
No, it's not - I'm a horrible person!
JOE
Forget about it - you weren't to know.
He pours two cups and hands them to her. She offers the five but he waves it away.
