Trigger warning, p.9
Trigger Warning, page 9
From the restaurant they moved to the harbour, they bought ice cream and watched the seagulls. Although they lived in a harsh reality, where they barely could pay the bills, these were moments when it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered.
Something interrupted them laughing on the park bench. A phone call. She saw Luca pick up the phone, with his usual, worried look on his face. He said it was his brother, he needed help again, and they needed to leave. She would stay at the trailer home that night, waiting for him to come home. It wasn’t his brother calling. It never was. It was some cunt working for the Arrows, forcing him to do something. It had never been his bloody brother.
Abby felt a hand on her shoulder. Without checking, she knew it was John. He quietly sat down next to her, his leg wrapped up in a bandage, his clothes fresh and dry. When he moved his hand to her back, she shuffled closer to him and rested her head on his shoulder. The sulking was over. Now the tears ran like rivers down her cheeks, quietly. She started to shiver in the cold, her clothes still being wet. John took off his jacket and placed it on her. Cuddling her, like she was a little child.
***
He took her back inside just before sunrise. Her skin felt cold and dead underneath the wet clothes. Raven came in to help her change into something dry. She didn’t say a word. Nobody said a word. The only thing Abby could hear was the voices of men she didn’t know, talking about the mission, of how they slaughtered the Arrows.
Once dressed, and with heavy steps, she walked to the sick room. A nurse; a short woman dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, but with a set of blue gloves on her hands, greeted her at the door. “Can I help you?”
“How’s… “she cleared her dry throat. “How’s Luca? The man who had been tied up. Broken ribs.”
The nurse’s smile faded, and she slowly shook her head. “He’s gone. His heart is still beating, but he’s gone. I’m sorry.”
Abby felt the pain strike her chest again, making her feel nauseated. Without thanking the nurse for the information, she walked into the room, found Luca on one of the beds, and crouched down next to him. He looked like he was sleeping, but despite all cuts and bruises on his face, he also looked like he was at peace.
“I love you too,” she said and kissed his cold forehead. “I’ll see you again, someday.”
Chapter 17
By morning, he was gone. Abby sat in the small office, where she had been sleeping while in the bunker. Both Raven and John had tried to talk to her, to offer her some nice words, but she declined any visitation. She needed to be alone. To think, to grieve. She tried to find anything positive about the whole situation, but it all went down the drain. She did get a chance to somewhat speak with him again before he died, and he had been able to see her face again, to hear her voice. But was he even in a state of mind, then, to understand what was going on? She hoped so, as it was all she had to hold on to.
What would happen now? She didn’t know. They had successfully wiped out a bunch of Arrows at the base, but they were everywhere. Not just in Whitestead, but all over the country. This wasn’t the end of anything, just a small victory for the Whitestead Syndicates, for the Streetwalkers. Abby was still stuck with them, and she had no idea how she would move forward. Without Luca, without any goals or dreams. Her memories of her life as Brooke Clarke didn’t matter anymore. She would eventually move back into her apartment on Bell Avenue and continue getting phone calls from Lee, asking her to do things she didn’t feel like doing.
She had killed a man, at least as far as she knew. And she couldn’t even feel anything. She didn’t feel sorry for the guy, after all, he was part of the monsters keeping Luca inside that, that horrid room. But she didn’t even feel different. She had heard on TV, and read in books, that a person often changes after they have killed someone, they go through a stage of remorse, of pain. She didn’t feel any of it.
Then it hit her. Garett. That bastard. He was going to bring her to the Arrows, to make them kill her, in front of Luca. She was certain; it was Garett. She left the room and searched for John, who was having a smoke.
“John, where is Garett?”
He looked confused. “Why do you want to know? What happened?”
“That bastard is the one who tried to kidnap me!”
“Whoa, hang on a minute, how do you know?”
Abby clenched her teeth together, feeling the rage. “I know! When I saw him at the base… I just knew. It was him!”
“You gotta have more to go on. Why would he do that?”
“Because of the money! What if they offered whoever could bring me in a bunch of fucking cash? You don’t think he’d do it?”
John put out his cigarette. “I don’t know. Let me talk to him.”
Abby moved up to John, standing close. “I’m coming with you.”
“Alright, alright. Come on.”
They found Garett, sitting in the kitchen, munching on a banana. His face went pale when he saw them walking in. He met Abby’s eye, and she could almost smell his fear.
“Garett, come with us for a minute,” John said.
“What for?”
“Just do it.”
Garett followed them back to the smoking area, where nobody could hear them. He leant up, nonchalantly, against the stone wall, and smirked. His ugly, black teeth exposed.
“You tried to fucking kill me!” Abby shouted.
“What?”
“Don’t even try to deny it.” Abby moved up to him, her hand forming a fist.
“Back off,” John said as he gently moved Abby away. “Abby thinks it was you. You showed up at her apartment and tried to kidnap her. Did you do it?”
“Oh, come on! I didn’t even know that happened!”
“Garett, we’ll take on a much less comfortable approach if you don’t tell us now. She’s sure it was you. Why did you do it? Did they offer you cash?”
Garett blinked a couple of times, a sign of getting nervous. “No man. It wasn’t me.”
“You fucking lying cunt!” Abby had to stop herself from attacking him with her fists, although she didn’t think she would be able to hit him very hard.
“Look, Abby, I understand you are angry, with your… boyfriend dying and all. But I didn’t do it!”
“I’ll fucking kill you!” She took a leap forward and punched the temple of Garett’s head. He flinched, then moved to the side, placing a hand on his head.
“What the fuck man?”
“Abby, calm down.” John moved her back again.
“He’s fucking lying.”
John took a breath, and in the blink of an eye, he punched Garett in the stomach, causing him to fold in half, then he pushed him over. “I can do this all day, Garett. Just tell us what you know.”
“Okay!” Garett held his hands up above his head. “Get the crazy bitch out of here, and I’ll tell you what I know!”
Abby had to resist the urge to get her gun and shoot him on the spot.
“Can you give us a moment?”
“No. I’m standing right here.”
“She’s standing right there,” John said as he crouched down to Garett’s level.
“I fucking hear her, alright? Just give me a second.” He rose from the floor and leant back up against the wall. “Fucking… shit was going downhill. I don’t work for the fucking Arrows. Alright? I swear to you.”
“That’s fine, but what do you know about the kidnapping?”
“I didn’t kidnap her!”
Was that a confession? “You didn’t what? It was you!”
“Abby, please.” John placed himself right in the middle of Abby and Garett. “Tell me everything.”
“They offered good money, alright. Ace wasn’t going to pay us anything. I have fucking bills to pay, unlike you lot who gets everything for free.”
“So it was you? You were going to kidnap her, for money?”
“What will you do if it was? You can’t do anything, because it never happened.”
“Just fucking tell me, man.”
“Yeah, alright, it was. But you can’t do anything about it. Never went through with it. I changed my mind. Alright?”
A wave of adrenaline shot through Abby’s veins. “Let me kill him, John.”
John shook his head, still looking at Garett. “You stupid fucking cunt.”
“I changed my mind!”
“It doesn’t matter,” John pushed Garett up against the wall and punched him in the stomach again, then he quickly pulled his arms behind his back. “Abby, get Jamie, or Lee.”
Nodding, Abby ran to find Lee.
***
Garett was moved into a separate room, an empty storage space, and then questioned by Lee. Abby waited with John outside. It felt like hours. What more would they possibly need? He was guilty, and he needed to pay for it.
“Why do you want to kill him?” John asked, after being quiet for a long time.
“What? Isn’t that what should happen anyway? He didn’t just try to kidnap me, but he was working with the enemy!”
“That’s not the point. I’m asking, why do you want to kill him?”
Abby sighed. “Isn’t it obvious? He worked for the same people who left Luca for dead. And what did Luca do? He also betrayed someone, he betrayed the Arrows. Similar crime. But I’m not as fucking heartless as them. Death will be an easy choice for Garett, compared to what Luca had to go through.”
John ran his fingers through his hair and managed to put on a faint smile. “Well, you’re right. And Lee will let you do it. Just remember, killing someone often has lasting consequences.”
“What do you mean?”
“On your mind.”
“Oh, trust me, I’ll be fine.” She actually thought she would. It was like she had turned numb. Maybe she would feel something after killing Garett, but she would do it for Luca.
Lee exited the room, wiping sweat from his forehead. “Well, he’s guilty. What do you want to do?” He was looking at Abby.
“What’s the punishment for betraying the syndicate?” she asked.
“Well, death. Do you want to do it? John said you might.”
Abby took a breath. “Yeah.”
“Alright.” Lee locked the door to the storage room. “I’ll speak with Jamie, then get back to you.”
***
John stayed with Abby, sitting next to each other on a couch, looking out over an empty, garage-like space filled with boxes and storage bins. He was acting strange, upset, maybe. Abby couldn’t quite place it, but it was like he didn’t like her anymore, or didn’t like what she was going to do. He didn’t talk much, didn’t do much at all.
“What’s the matter with you?” she asked, trying to gain eye contact.
“With me?” John chuckled. “Nothing wrong with me. It’s you I am concerned about.”
“Why?”
John moved his face closer to hers. “I just don’t want you to do anything you’ll regret. You’re grieving right now. Not the best time to make important decisions.”
Abby frowned, annoyed. “So, what? Should I just let Lee do it? Or you? What for? It was me he was going to kidnap, and since I’ll be stuck doing… this for the rest of my miserable life. Why not get used to it?”
John sighed, but didn’t move a muscle. “Fine. I trust you.”
“Thank you.” Abby glanced down at John’s mouth, feeling the urge she had grown accustomed to, wanting to kiss him. But she didn’t, she had to do this first, she had to finish it, for Luca.
When Lee came back, he was holding a revolver. Wearing his usual, fancy suit, he handed it to Abby. “You sure you can do it?”
“Yeah.” Abby accepted the gun, checked it, and drew in a breath.
“It’s all yours.”
With determination flowing through her body. She walked, without looking around her, to the storage room. She unlocked it, stepped inside, and switched on the light. Garett was sitting on a chair in the middle of the room, his arms tied behind his back, and his feet tied together. A memory flashed before Abby’s eyes. The memory of the man, the Arrow, at the club. The man Lee had forced her to see, in order to toughen up and realise what was going on.
Now, she was the one with the gun. She only allowed a quick glance at Garett’s scared face before she turned back around and cocked the gun. Don’t look at him, just do it, if you don’t, someone else will, and you will get no closure, none whatsoever.
She turned her gaze back to Garett and aimed the gun at his head. Taking a couple of steps forward, she ensured she wouldn’t miss. Just before she pulled the trigger, she saw Garett close his eyes. Once she was finished, she didn’t stay to look at the damage, she quickly exited the room, avoiding any nasty memories to cling on to her brain. John met her outside, and she collapsed into his arms, tears flowing.
But these weren’t tears of guilt or fear; it was tears of moving on, of being brave enough not to stay stuck in the past. Whatever comes her way, and whatever happens, she’ll deal with it, and never look back.
About the Author
M. M. Wedin was born and raised in Sweden, Scandinavia. At age twenty, she moved to Melbourne Australia and has lived there ever since.
Writing has always come naturally to her, but it took years to build up the appropriate skills and the courage to publish and make her stories available to the public. Apart from being a writer, she is also an editor and web designer.
To find out more about M. M. Wedin, visit her website at
www.melinasvoice.com
or catch up with her on
www.facebook.com/melinasvoice
M M Wedin, Trigger Warning
