Zero fox given, p.10
Zero Fox Given, page 10
“But I’m not courageous like you’re ex girlfriend, okay? I couldn’t have just walked away.”
“That’s the thing, yes, you could have. There’s nothing Angie has that you don’t already have; in fact, you’ve got it better than Angie did because her family didn’t talk to her for two years after she did what she did. They’re barely talking now. You’ve got a family that loves you and wants to make you happy, and I don’t know, maybe that gets in your way sometimes, but you can’t punish them or yourself because they’re doing the best they know how to do.”
Zelda tried to absorb all of that. It was difficult. She still wanted to fight. Her hackles were still raised high and everything inside her told her to back away from him. To deny everything he said.
Because if she admitted to herself that she did have courage, that she could make responsible decisions, then she would have to admit that she’d done a few things wrong.
“It’s okay,” Victor said. “It’s okay to not get everything just the way you want it all to be all the time. It’s okay to make mistakes. Just don’t tell yourself that you don’t have the courage to do something, because then you’ll start to believe it. And if you believe it, every time someone says something remotely troubling to you, you’ll regress.”
“You mean run to my room and slam the door.”
Victor grinned at her. “Yes, something like that.”
Zelda’s eyes burned. She looked away from Victor, but only because she was too ashamed and embarrassed. Of everything.
She could have been a collage graduate by now. She could have her life, her own home, her own responsibilities by now if she hadn’t let herself lie down and let everyone make her decisions for her.
Victor sighed, his hands pulling away from her shoulders, taking their warmth with him.
Zelda was left standing there, cold and embarrassed.
“Come on. We can talk while we walk.”
She rubbed at her face, desperately trying to get rid of the wet burn in her eyes. “Walk where?”
“Somewhere no one can listen in on us. I said a lot of private shit to you, and you look like you don’t want anyone to overhear any of this either.”
“What happened to facing your problems head on?”
Victor shook his head, that damned quirk of his lips coming back. “It’s one thing to face an enemy when you’re prepared for him, but everyone knows you don’t go to a fight unprepared. Come on, let’s go.”
They weren’t talking about fighting, but Zelda supposed she could see what he meant by that. She followed him.
Her pack was well lit, even in spaces where there were no houses. Victor didn’t take her into the darkness of the trees, but to one of the open areas of the pack.
The trees had been cleared out a long time ago. Cars and trucks sometimes parked here whenever the pack was having a party. Picnic tables and barbecues were also brought out here if it was something more informal, like the Fourth of July, or a wedding.
Zelda shivered. “I got married in this spot,” she said.
Victor looked at her, a brow lifting. “You did?”
Zelda nodded, suddenly kind of bashful about it. “It was one of my bridal requests. I wanted the marriage to take place in my own pack. As you can see, all the benches, and the gazebo is gone.”
Victor glanced around. “Do you want to go somewhere else?”
Zelda almost said yes. She stopped herself, then shook her head. “No. Face it all head on, right?”
Victor grinned at that.
And only then did Zelda start to feel a little more normal. A little more relaxed.
“So, what are we going to do out here? You want to teach me about personal responsibility?”
“Maybe.”
Zelda had to smile at him. “Okay, so I can work on not getting angry at my brother for not believing me when I said you’re my mate, but what if I happen to like going out to parties? What if pole dancing lessons are something I want to do for the rest of my life?” An amazing thought suddenly hit her. “I could teach pole dancing lessons!”
“You would actually have to be good at it before you could get started.”
Zelda punched him in the arm. The bastard snorted a laugh, but he barely flinched.
“I will get you back for that one.”
“That’s something of the point.”
Zelda blinked at him.
Victor just smiled back at her, that same wicked grin. He took off his jacket. She noticed he didn’t have his holster on.
“Where’s your gun?”
“Left it with Steve. It’s not the best idea in the world to have a loaded weapon on me if I’m going to teach you anything physical.”
“Physical?” Her pulse raced at the thought.
“Not sex. I’m going to teach you some self-defense. We’ll talk about how much going to nightclubs actually means to you later. This is more important.”
“Wait, what? You’re going to teach me self-defense? Really?”
“Of course. You’re young and healthy, and the situation you’re in requires some basic knowledge of self-defense.”
The objections came immediately. “I can barely swat a fly. I don’t even like laying out mouse traps because I think they’re cruel, and I have to get Link or Uncle Mike to squash the spiders in the house.”
“Flies, mice, and spiders aren’t trying to do you any physical harm.”
“I beg to differ!”
Victor may have smiled at her, but he still shrugged his shoulders, entirely uncaring for her plight against spiders and mice. “Beg to differ until the cows come home, when it’s your life on the line, instinct to survive will take over and if you don’t know how to harness that, you’ll get a little more of what happened outside of that nightclub where you and I met.”
Zelda shivered. She could still feel the hand around her mouth. The hand that had been holding a cloth wet with chloroform.
“Do you ever want to be in that position again?”
Zelda shook her head. “No.”
Victor laced his fingers together and cracked his knuckles. “Okay, then this should be simple.”
“But what can you teach me that would even work?”
Even when she wasn’t playing at being a damsel, she was still as helpless as they came. Her bone structure didn’t exactly bode well for a fight.
“You’re a shifter, aren’t you?”
Her fox ears flicked. “Yeah?”
“So, if someone grabs you, bring your teeth out and bite them. You could even shift into your animal shape. It’s incredibly hard to hold onto a wriggling animal with claws and teeth.”
Made sense. “I suppose.”
Victor stepped up to her again, taking her hand, looking at her manicured nails. “These are an especially important weapon.”
“My manicure?”
“Yes, exactly. Even if you can’t focus enough to change, putting these into the eyes of your enemy will guarantee they will drop you. If someone has you like this,”—he grabbed her by the throat, but didn’t hold on hard enough to cut off her airway—“most people will grab the wrists of their attacker, trying to pry them off.”
“Because they can’t breathe.”
Zelda even tried to remove his hands, but he held on tight enough that she couldn’t budge him.
“Yes, that makes sense, but if you go for their eyes, you’ll be released so fast, and if you do a little damage, you’ll have the chance to run while your assailant tries to recover. Try it on me.”
She blinked at him. “What?”
He grinned, shaking his head. “I won’t let you stick your nails in my eyes. I’ll know it’s coming.”
“They why bother?”
“Because the point is the same. My instinct to protect my eyes will force me to release you, even if I see the attack coming. I will have to let you go. Try it.”
She didn’t want to. What if she accidentally got him in the eyes? It seemed gross, but, at the same time, he was clearly not going to release her until she gave him what he wanted.
And in a way, she wanted to make him proud.
So Zelda moved quickly, pushing her fingernails towards his eyes.
He released her and stepped back fast. Fast enough that she hadn’t been able to get anywhere near his eyes, but he did let her go.
“Good. Very good.”
“What if they’re behind me?”
Victor nodded. “All right. Try this.”
He came up behind her, looping his arm around her throat, but again, he didn’t use enough pressure to cut off her airways, he just held on, preventing her from moving even when she struggled.
She didn’t like it. It reminded her too much of the way that guy had grabbed her.
“Don’t just fight like that. I’m up close and personal with you. You’re within reach to just put your hands back and find my eyes.”
She did, again. Victor released her quickly and stepped back, protecting his eyes.
Now Zelda was starting to feel a little more confident. “This really works?”
Victor nodded, pride in his gaze that hadn’t been there a few minutes ago. “It does. And believe it or not, but turning yourself into dead weight also helps. It’s incredibly difficult to carry someone like that, and if you’re in the middle of a struggle, it can throw off your attacker. He might drop you. You get up and run for it.”
Zelda put that information away for later. “Right. Okay, anything else I need to know?”
“Yes.” Victor crossed his arms. “It’s the most basic but most important thing. If I’m ever not around, and you have no way of running, remember this one key thing and it could save your life.”
Zelda pressed her lips together. The idea of him not being around was…troubling, but she was willing to listen. “Okay, shoot.”
Victor ticked off his fingers. “Stop your enemy from being able to move, to see, or to breathe, and you’ll up your chances for survival.”
“Okay.” Zelda nodded. “How do I do all of that?”
Victor grinned. “It means to go for their eyes, their throat, or their knees and feet. I’ll be showing you a little of all of that tonight.”
Zelda shivered, but she had to admit, she was eager to learn. “Couldn’t I just kick my attacker in the balls and run for it?”
“You’d be amazed at how well men actually protect that part of themselves.” Victor shrugged. “If you can get the shot in, great, but someone trying to grab at you who happens to be a male will usually see a retaliation like that coming. They don’t expect you to go for the eyes.”
Zelda nodded. “Right. Okay, eyes, throat, and joints.”
“Preferably the knee. You get a hard kick with the right angle in that spot and your attacker will go down.”
Zelda made a mental note of that, already pumping herself up to practice with Victor.
It was such a powerful feeling. The sense of control Victor gave to her as he went over the steps was unlike anything she’d ever felt before in her life.
No longer did she feel like a helpless snowflake flitting through life, waiting to melt as the slightest possible infraction. She felt confident. Just as she had when she’d been on the dance floor with so many eyes on her.
Only now instead of sexy confident, she felt bad ass confident.
She could get used to that feeling.
Chapter 15
Zelda wasn’t sure how long they practiced for, but it was a while. She was glad she’d been wearing comfortable clothes when she’d tried to make dinner earlier. The idea of Victor dragging her out of bed wearing a tight little skirt and high heels so he could teach her how to…not fight. That wasn’t what it was, and when she’d asked him about it, he’d made sure to clarify himself about it, too.
He was not teaching her how to fight. He was teaching her how to survive in the event someone grabbed her.
When he finished with her, Zelda sweated from top to bottom, her t-shirt clung to her, and being grabbed and held onto so many times by her mate, just for him to suddenly release her whenever she went for his eyes, or tried to punch his throat, or even dig her nails into his beck, got to her on a level she never thought possible.
Her body responded to Victor sexually whenever he grabbed her.
It got to the point where she stopped trying too hard to get away.
How could she possibly want to escape him when he held her so tightly to his back? She felt his heart slamming against his chest and through her shoulder blade.
Her blood thrummed hot.
It was likely only a product of their physical activity. The heat they produced as they worked together. Still, Zelda couldn’t help herself. She wanted him. She wanted Victor so badly that it hurt.
His breath rasped in her ear, making it flick from the warmth. “You’re getting too tired for this.”
It was sort of true, but she shook her head. “Not too tired for something else.”
She never would have been so bold with Harry. Whenever he’d wanted sex, for the most part, she gave in. Not that he’d ever been demanding. For a psycho murderer, he’d been fairly accommodating with that aspect of their marriage.
But she’d always waited for him to make the first move. Even when it had occurred to her that she could ask for sex, she’d just waited for Harry to give her the look, or to notice when his hands had rested on her in a certain way. She’d never said no to him. She’d tell him when she wasn’t feeling well, or when it was that time of the month for her, but now that she thought about it, she’d never told him no, and she’d never been the one to ask him for it in the first place.
How would he have reacted to her if she had asked for it, or if she had just flat out told him no?
With Victor, even though they had yet to have sex even once, the fact that he was so easy with the word no made her feel as though she could say it, too.
If and when the time came, which she doubted it ever would. Not with the way he touched her now.
Christ, he wasn’t even touching her in any way that could be deemed as almost sexual, and her body still responded to him.
“You say you’re not too tired for something else, but the fact that you keep dozing off makes me think otherwise.”
“I’m not dozing off.”
“You’re barely paying attention. It’s why I keep grabbing you. Why you’re not out of my hands yet.”
“I don’t want to be out of your hands.” She didn’t want to struggle to get away from him. She didn’t want to practice anymore. She wanted to stay out there with him and mate with him. Really mate with him.
She was tired of dancing around this.
The heat she felt all along his body, and the heat she felt rushing lower still, told her he wanted the same thing.
Victor backed off. He released her suddenly and without her having to do anything to push him away.
Disappointment filled her from top to bottom. Even knowing he didn’t like the sight of her pouting, she couldn’t help it.
“You know why I can’t.”
“Is it really because you’re my bodyguard? Or is it because of what happened with you and your ex?”
Victor barely moved. He stared at her, long and hard, as though calculating his words carefully.
“This has nothing to do with Angie. I’m not afraid you will hurt me, Zelda. I’m afraid I will hurt you if I don’t do my job properly. People get hurt if I don’t pay attention on the job; that’s sort of the point of me being here.”
“You don’t need to worry about that right now. We’re safe right where we are. We’re at my pack.” She reached out, gently taking him by his hand. “No one will see us.”
His nostrils flared. Zelda never in her life would have thought that to be something dangerous, but there was a warning in his eyes, in the tightness of his lips, in his expression in general.
“Steve is still out there. You’re not even being paid for this anymore. Let him do it.”
“I can’t.”
“Yes, you can.”
Zelda pushed herself to her toes, her mouth finding his. She inhaled deeply through her nose as their mouths met, the briefest touch of his tongue against her lips making her heady and drunk on sensation.
Victor had only ever kissed her twice before, and those times weren’t enough for her to get used to the feeling. Even when she was the one taking charge like this, she could barely bring herself to hold on.
A low growl rumbled inside Victor’s chest. His strong, heated hands settled on Zelda’s waist.
For a brief, terrible second, Zelda feared he would push her away, break off the kiss, and walk her back home.
He didn’t. Victor’s hands tightened on her waist, pulling her closer to his body heat, as though making sure she wouldn’t go anywhere.
If Zelda had been a cat shifter, she would have purred. Instead, she did the next best thing and let out a sound of triumph as she threw her arms around Victor’s neck, holding him tightly, pushing his mouth open and sliding her tongue inside to say a proper hello to his mouth.
Again with that rumbling sound. Zelda liked it. She liked the way Victor pushed his tongue back against hers before he pushed inside her mouth, as though it was now his turn to taste her.
Zelda moaned. The fact that Victor swallowed her kiss made the sensation that much better. Her body was on fire from the very tip of her tail to the top of her ears.
As Zelda pushed her body against Victor’s, demanding more of him, something animal seemed to awaken in the man. His grip around her waist tightened. He pulled her so close that she was flush against him, her breasts pushing up against his powerful chest through her shirt and lace bra.
Zelda felt the steady drum of his heart. Her feet left the ground. Victor didn’t even pull her up into his arms. He just lifted her a few inches off her feet and started walking with her.
As though she weighed nothing at all.
A hard surface pushed against the back of Zelda’s legs. A shocked cry escaped her lips as she was pushed against the rough surface.
