Devoted, p.11
Devoted, page 11
He has only cameras; he doesn’t have fences. It makes sense the trail was created for the people who live in this area, but also to respect their privacy.
“If you like the hike, we can do it,” he offers. “That way we don’t have to drive if you don’t want to, but you won’t have to be on the road.”
“That’d be fun.” Nothing like my middle-of-the-night flight through Bel Air.
He takes out the backpack he brought along and slings it over his shoulder. I would offer to carry it, but I know he’ll say no.
Our surroundings are quiet. I can hear the distant drone of engines, a little louder than at the cabin. Birds are singing overhead, and the faint buzz of insects is all around me. The marked trail is a cleared dirt path a few feet wide.
Cannon lets me lead to set the pace. I walk at a comfortable speed. Being able to literally stretch my legs like this boosts my spirits. The walks I take around Cannon’s yard are pleasant, if limited. There’s nowhere to go except around the house unless I want to change out of my leggings and roam through the trees. And his little studio is the best gift I’ve ever gotten, but it’s nowhere near the size of a regulation dance floor.
Outside, on the trail, there’s no limit. It’s not that I need the exercise as much as I need to be boundless and free.
I glance over my shoulder. Cannon’s expression is the calmest I’ve ever seen. The lines of stress etched around his eyes and his mouth are gone. The peace of the trees has soaked into him. His body language is relaxed. He’s feeling the same as me. This is the reason he bought the cabin.
“Is there a destination, or are we just walking? I’m good either way.” And I am. Any place Cannon has to show me will be interesting, but if we both need to just hike, that’s fine too.
“It’s not big enough to call a lake, but when the terrain grows more rugged up ahead, there’s a little watering hole.”
I stop. Cannon comes to an abrupt halt before ramming into me. He hooks his thumbs around the straps of the pack. “What’s wrong?”
“What does the watering hole serve?” I’m as city as someone can get. I’m not New York City. A rat would scare the shit out of me. But there’re animals bigger than rats in the mountains.
His brows draw in before he chuckles. “Don’t worry, swan. There’re no animals that are going to eat you out here.” He lifts a shoulder. “I mean, maybe a mountain lion, but the coyotes should leave us alone.”
“Mountain lion?” Prickles burst across the backs of my shoulders, and I expect to turn around and see a hundred pairs of glowing eyes deep in the trees.
He grins, but it’s reassuring. “Mountain lion attacks are rare. They have plenty to eat this deep into the trees, and if we steer clear of them, they should steer clear of us.”
Hopefully, but I’m glad I’m not alone. I’m too much of a city girl to take these trails unaccompanied. Maybe one day I’ll be comfortable on them by myself. One of the few benefits of being sequestered for so long.
I suck in a deep breath of forest air, redolent of cedar and sugar pine. The smell of nature soothes me even if other parts of nature might want to eat me.
I keep going, and the trail trends upward. My legs are starting to burn, but it only makes me want to go harder. Muscles I don’t use enough are firing awake. It’s a good feeling.
To the right, a twinkle of blue becomes visible about fifty feet off the trail.
“Is that it?” I ask.
“That’s the one. It’s not large enough to swim in and there’s no visible source, but it’s perfect for the animals.” He swings his pack off and digs out one of the bottles of water. Handing me one, he says, “I think that’s why I like it. Some parts of these mountains aren’t meant to be used by us, but we’re lucky bastards to be able to see it anyway.”
I bet Jacobi and Kase don’t know Cannon’s artistic soul. Have they seen beyond the snarky, sometimes crabby veteran? It’s more than that he’s a dancer. His creativity is his core. Our time alone together has given me a glimpse of the Cannon few others have seen. The deeply reflective, artistic Cannon is a lot like this watering hole. Not meant for the public, and I’m privileged to be able to see it.
Several minutes tick by before restlessness sets in again. I’m cognizant that the trail doesn’t loop back to the parking area. To get back, I’ll need to double my exertion. “Is there more up ahead, or should we go back?”
“It’s up to you.” He takes my water bottle and tucks it back into the pack along with his. “There’s a pretty impressive drop-off in another quarter mile. It’s almost a shock after passing a little area like this. You keep expecting more of the same, and then boom, nothing but air.”
“Sounds like something I need to see.”
We share a smile. It’s something he wants to share, but he didn’t want to push me.
Once more, I marvel over how in sync I can be with a man I used to think was the complete opposite of me.
Cannon
* * *
Penelope’s jaw drops as soon as we clear the trees. I set the pack down again, her astonishment more satisfying than I expected. The powerlessness of our time out here fades when I can introduce her to views like this.
“This is crazy.” Without stepping forward, she peers over the edge.
The drop-off begins several feet in front of her, but the sheer steepness of it fills a person with uneasiness. The edge of the trail feels too close. At the end of the dirt, the slope begins. One wrong step, and it’s a ragged beating all the way down to rocks that have fallen over the centuries. This trail has withstood the test of time, but anyone who isn’t paying attention won’t.
From the boulders at the bottom, the land swoops out and up again, but not as high as the part of the mountain we’re on. That leaves a breathtaking view.
When I decided to quit contract work and buy the cabin, I spent months wandering the area. It had been so long since I’d had a permanent home that I wanted to learn every square inch of my place and the surrounding area. I hiked these trails for weeks, and this was one of the first views that made me pause and question my life.
There’re miles of steep inclines and trees. In one direction, rooftops are visible, same with roads cutting through the trees. In the opposite direction, it’s just more trees and mountains. A scenic message from the universe telling me that I was just another animal in a big world. It was the first time I stopped to think that maybe the fault of my mom’s ballet school shouldn’t rest on my shoulders. There’s too much of the world to rest on any one person’s shoulders.
It’s here I realized I’m one person. My mother was responsible. The investors were responsible. Perhaps even the adults who didn’t listen when the kids tried to tell them something was wrong. That doesn’t mean I can’t accept some responsibility. Karina tried to talk to me, but I was too busy meeting new challenges head-on. I was a teenage boy wrapped up in his own world.
That day, I shed some of the weight I’d carried around. I acknowledged that I didn’t run away, that my knee-jerk reaction to join the military and leave everything and everyone behind was an attempt to help. To be useful to society. To make amends.
For a while, it was in the form of helping my fellow soldiers and protecting people in another country. Then it was guarding people and assets associated with businesses. Hunting down lying and cheating spouses was more like a poison, and that’s when I veered off my path and came too close to my own personal cliff. I thought it would be karmic, but it was toxic.
Penelope’s troubles were the belay rope that kept me from plummeting into nothingness. She was the second drop-off that made me stop and question my life. I have a calling. Maybe it’s saving people. Maybe it’s saving just one person. I don’t know. Yet.
“I can’t believe they don’t have, like, a railing or something.” She glances ahead where the trail hugs the side of the mountain before it slopes down to lead into the valley and away from the cliff. “I guess that’s a bit city girl of me. People aren’t hiking out here because they want complete safety.”
“The thrill is a bonus, but my guess is there aren’t enough hikers on this trail to build in safety features.” I heft the pack around my shoulders. She stuffs her water bottle back inside. We’ve gone farther than I expected. I didn’t pack enough for a long hike. “Ready to head back?”
“Yes, we should before you end up having to carry me back. My feet aren’t used to uneven ground. These are good shoes, but I’m a concrete princess.”
I’ve carried her before, and I’ll carry her again. It would bother her more than it does me.
We take the trail back, making better time than before. The closer we get to the car, the more Penelope chats about what she sees. A new bird. The different sounds of insects from the city. The scuttle of what’s probably a rabbit nearby.
We emerge from the trees. There’s no one else in the parking lot. My phone vibrates. I unlock the doors and peek at the screen, pausing with my hand on the door handle. I have several missed messages from Kase telling me to call him as soon as possible. Damn.
I don’t say anything as we get in. Penelope didn’t notice I looked at my phone. I’m not ruining the hike for her. We’re minutes from the house. I’ll wait to call Kase.
She gushes about the hike on the drive back, dragging me out of the mental tunnel Kase’s messages sent me into.
What the hell is Roman up to? Will there be a day when I don’t ask that question?
“Mind if I call London again?” She calls her friend every other day. Kase said he would get a phone to Holland, and I expect Penelope will alternate which friend she calls each day.
Grateful she has friends she’s able to stay in touch with, I’m more relieved she’ll sit out on the front step to chat with her best friend. I need her to keep the routine. I don’t want her overhearing everything until I get the whole story. There’s always time to worry. Fewer moments like she’s having now.
I wait in my office until I hear the front door open and close. Then I call Kase back. “Sorry, we went for a hike.”
He jumps right in. “I finally tapped into information about the guy Penelope called Mick. His real name is Michael Coriander, and he’s honestly a lot like you, just on Team Roman.”
No, Mick is fucking nothing like me. He’s more like Roman. Cold and unfeeling. “He was both military and a contractor?”
“ ‘Mercenary’ might be a better description.”
My irritation lashes out. “Then he’s nothing like me.”
“My bad, I didn’t mean it that way. Just that he has skills, but where I know you’re a good guy with sometimes questionable morals, Mick can be either good or bad. He has limits, but offing the rich wife of a shady asshole isn’t one of them.”
I hate that my friends think I have questionable morals. I did some things during my PI investigations that would lift some eyebrows. I’d sleep with women for information. But it was mutual, a way for them to get something they wanted while they gave me something I wanted. That’s not much different from hooking up with someone I met at a bar. I never hurt anyone who wasn’t first trying to hurt me or someone else. As far as my other tactics, moral and law-abiding don’t always mean the same thing. But, whatever. It’s not like I gave them any other impression.
“So, you found out who Mick really is. The other guys too?”
“Tony and Xavier. The three of them have done jobs together before. None of them have records, but I think it’s because they’ve never been caught. I get the impression they’ll do certain jobs for enough money and won’t lose sleep at night, but it’s not like they have evil tattooed on their bodies.”
“That’s not not evil.”
“Funny, that’s how I describe my parents.” From what I know about Kase’s family, he isn’t kidding.
Roman hired a team, like we thought. That wasn’t why Kase called and kept calling. “Why’d you blow up my phone with missed calls?”
“Yeah… Checked out a couple popular media gossip sites. Penni’s on them.”
“What the fuck for?” Did Roman go public, and how’s he spinning the story?
Kase’s tone is heavy, almost apologetic. “Basically, they’re saying the daughter of former child actress Brittany Cowles left her rich husband and ran off with the bodyguard. Something about how very un-Basic Bitch it is.”
That son of a bitch. That’s how he’s spinning it, how he’s discrediting Penelope. That motherfucker. Why so public?
Kase might not have wanted to tell me, but I can hear the restraint in his voice. There’s more. As if that isn’t bad enough. “And?”
“It’s pretty insulting of Penni. They allude to a failed competition. They’re insinuating that she parted ways with Juan Pablo because they were having an affair and she moved on with you.”
“Fuck.” I pinch the bridge of my nose. I feel fucking awful for Penelope, but I can’t ignore the relief wiping out the adrenaline spike I experienced when Kase first told me. I haven’t been dragged into the spotlight. The situation could be worse for us. I hate Penelope’s image getting splashed around, but as long as it’s just her, we’re safe. The more my face is flashed around, the higher the likelihood someone will recognize me, increasing the chances we can be found.
It’s still a possibility if even one picture of me was leaked. “Maybe we should boost security around here.”
“I’ll make arrangements. You’ll want to alarm all possible entrances, maybe set up wildlife cameras in a wider radius than what you have. I’ll get it all arranged with Jacobi and be out there.”
“I appreciate it, man.”
“I’d rather do this work than my normal job. Trust me.”
“But you’re not getting paid.”
“Pro bono cleans my conscience. It can go from muddy to murky.”
“Then I won’t offer to pay you back.” My smile from my joke fades as soon as I disconnect the call.
London’s probably filling Penelope in on all the grim details. I need to assess the damage. I steel myself and go online.
Penelope
* * *
The energy of my hike invigorates me. I wander around the front yard instead of sitting on the top step of the porch.
When London answers, I grin. “Hey!”
“Oh, Penni. I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”
My vibrant mood is obliterated. “What’s wrong?”
“Oh. Didn’t Kase get a hold of you?”
“No? Unless Cannon’s talking to him now. We’ve been hiking, and our signal was bad.”
“It’s the news, Penni. It had to be Roman who gave the media a story about you leaving him for your bodyguard.”
London’s so distraught, but I can’t find the source. Sure, the story sucks, but there’re worse things the gossip rags could be saying about me. They could’ve dragged Mother into it more than they did. “Is that all? I left Roman for a man closer to my age?”
I’m more worried about Basic Bitch Nutrition. Roman could be using the media to flush me out since closing the studio didn’t work. Mother gave me a place to stay. She supported me. He’ll figure out we are closer than before and target her reputation.
And what about Cannon? Is his picture out there? Will anyone recognize him?
“Oh, honey. They’re making all sorts of speculations about you and Juan Pablo. And the way they’re going after your mother is just unfair. They’re trying to make comparisons to failed careers and failed marriages with both of you.”
A cloud covers the sun, the perfect way to describe my mood. The sky might as well open up and dump acid rain on me. “Do you know how bad the damage is? Is there any way I can talk to Mother or see how Juan Pablo is doing?” I chew on a fingernail to keep me anchored while my thoughts threaten to spiral out of control.
“I don’t know. I’m so sorry. Your mom is at least familiar with how entertainment media works. Maybe your dad is too?”
Father hates the spotlight, but he should remember the early days of his marriage to Mother. When she was doing bit parts and trying to break into adult roles. The magazines back then used to love to rip her apart—her looks, her acting, her choice of husband. She left the world to preserve herself and her marriage. It helped until their opposite personalities did the rest.
I make a fist to keep from chewing my entire nail off. “Why would this story be a thing? Why would people care?” I exhale and close my eyes. I sink onto the bottom step. My energy is drained. “Never mind. I guess the better question is—since we can suspect Roman of leaking the details, my question is why?”
“I don’t know that either. God, I feel like I’m just telling you shitty news and I have absolutely no solutions. But I agree. That’s the right question. How does it benefit Roman for the world to think you left him for a bodyguard?”
My panic creeps higher. How’s Mother taking this? Is the gossip causing issues between Juan Pablo and his wife? A tremble runs through my body. It’s bad enough Roman’s men shot at my mother and he shut down the strip mall. I’m helpless to stop his swath of destruction through those I love. “The reality is that if it were true, it would’ve been an easy decision—to run off with anyone. But he’s not telling people the truth about himself. So how does this story benefit him? Or rather, his business?”
“He won’t hurt us,” London says with confidence I don’t feel. “He knows enough about Jacobi to give us a wide radius. Same with Holland and Kase. If I use your logic, then going after our image won’t benefit him. It’d put him at risk.”
“Trashing Juan Pablo’s marriage doesn’t help him either.”
“Entertainment news loves to make people assume men and women can’t have a nonsexual relationship. Even Roman would have to know that. If he doesn’t, his team would.”
She can’t see me, but I nod. My thoughts are swirling, and I’ll have to get off the phone with her to think about the situation. I’ll have to watch all the media I’ve been taught to avoid and wade into the vicious social media posts. “Can you believe that we’re talking like this?”
