Holding her heart, p.19
Holding her Heart, page 19
spoken since last weekend when she left the club, but Eden
was slowly coming to terms with the fact that Aster had just
panicked, so the humiliation didn’t feel so severe anymore.
She cleared her throat and dialled Blair’s number.
“H-hello?” Blair spoke quietly.
“Hi, it’s me,” Eden said. Maybe she’d been a little harsh
in not calling sooner. “Are you free for a few minutes? I
understand if you’re not.”
“No, I’m free.”
“Right, well, I was wondering if I could speak to you
about something?”
Blair remained silent. Well, this was awkward.
“Blair?”
Blair sighed. “Go on. I’m here. What do you need?”
“Are you mad at me?” Eden asked, her stomach lurching.
She had every right to be upset with Blair last weekend, but
she knew Blair would have been worried this week without
hearing from Eden.
“No, I’m not mad. Just…thought you may have called
before now.”
“I know. I needed space.”
“Well, I hope you found some. How are you?”
“I’m okay.” Should she tell Blair that she was going on a
dinner date tonight? She felt as though she should, but Blair
wouldn’t be impressed with the fact that she hadn’t told her
about her meeting with Aster last night or last week. They
shared everything with one another.
“Good. I never meant to make you feel as though I was
humiliating you. Aster told me she was interested. More than
interested. So, I don’t understand what happened. I am sorry
it didn’t work out for you.”
“I’m going to dinner with her tonight.”
“O-oh.” Blair’s surprise wasn’t unexpected. Eden still
couldn’t quite believe it herself. “Well, that’s nice. I hope you
have a lovely night.”
“Honestly, I’m terrified.” Eden dropped to the bed,
placing her head in one hand. A cold sweat developed across
her skin, the air in the room thick with uncertainty. “What if
she wants more tonight? As much as I’d love to get my hands
on her, I don’t think I’m there yet.”
“I don’t think Aster is the type of person who wants a
shag on the first date. She’s too respectable.”
“But, what if she does?”
Blair laughed. “Then you tell her it’s too soon and that’s
that. But I don’t think you need to worry about her dragging
you into bed. And if I’m not wrong, she’s probably feeling
exactly how you are.”
“You think?”
“I’d be very surprised if she wasn’t.”
“Blair, I really like her. But I mean, really like her. And I
know I’m nervous about tonight, but God, I can’t wait to see
her.”
“Maybe now she’ll give you that kiss she turned down.”
Eden’s face heated. “That kinda happened already…”
“Oh, it did now?”
“She showed up last Sunday. God, she was breaking my
heart with everything she said to me. And it just happened. I
told her how I felt, but then she had to leave to visit her
dad.”
“Okay. This is good.”
“Why didn’t you tell me how amazing it was kissing a
woman? You’ve been keeping that a secret for too long!”
“She’s good then, huh?”
Eden’s insides swirled. “Oh, you’ve no idea.” If Eden had
known how last week would have felt, she’d have done it
much sooner than now. The longing, the desperate need to
be with Aster, it could have been averted. But then wasn’t
that part of the thrill? Didn’t it add to the excitement when
that time finally arrived? “Tonight is everything I’ve been
praying for. I didn’t think I’d see her again. My worst fear
was that she’d leave the company and then I’d be left in the
dark, but she came back with me last night when we finished
working…”
“And?”
“And it felt so good to be alone with her. She just held me,
Blair. We lay on the couch and relaxed with one another.”
“I like her. I think she could be good for you.”
Eden smiled. “I’m glad to hear that.”
“She certainly put me in my place last weekend.”
What did that mean? “How so?”
“I was angry with her when she turned you down. I found
her outside talking to Dom, and we may have had words.
There was some yelling involved.”
“Blair.” Eden sighed.
“Oh, she held her own. And the only thing she was
concerned about was the fact that you’d gone home alone,
and you were upset. She didn’t care about what I had to say,
which I admire since it’s none of my business, but she was
worried about you above all else.”
“I know I’m doing the right thing. Any consequences can
be dealt with another time.”
“Consequences?” Blair asked.
“Any that may arise. Family, friends…you know.”
“Honey, they are the least of your worries. If they can’t
accept the fact that you’ve fallen for a woman, simply don’t
invite them to the wedding.” Blair laughed, and Eden
followed. “But in all seriousness, I hope tonight is something
beautiful for you both. Enjoy every moment of it.”
Eden exhaled a slow breath. “I only called to ask what
dress you think I should wear. But it doesn’t matter. The fact
that we’re sharing the evening together is the most
important thing.”
“Correct. Call me tomorrow.”
“I will.”
Blair cleared her throat. “And I’m sorry. I never meant for
last weekend to happen.”
“It doesn’t even matter anymore. I’ll call you. Love you.”
“I love you, too.”
Aster blew out a shaky breath, turning her watch towards
her. Eden was due at the restaurant any minute now, but she
had a sinking feeling that her date wouldn’t show. Aster had
insisted she pick her up on the way, but Eden was
determined to arrive alone. She shouldn’t think too deeply
into it, but Aster’s mind had run into overdrive. If Eden
didn’t show…devastated wouldn’t come close to how she’d
feel.She’d built herself up all day, had numerous pep talks
from Grace, and now here she was. Waiting. Just…waiting.
And this was the part she hated most. Standing around with
no idea what would happen. And then Aster’s attention
turned to how remarkable Eden would look tonight if she did
show up. In all honesty, she wasn’t satisfied that she looked
good enough to be on Eden’s arm.
Will I be on her arm? Would that happen? Could they walk
into the restaurant as a couple, or would Eden prefer a more
subtle entrance? As friends, perhaps? Aster had it all planned
out in her head. The hand on the small of her back, the eyes
across the table, the innuendo. But what if Eden didn’t want
that? What if Aster was getting way ahead of herself? God,
this wasn’t good. The feeling she had inside didn’t feel as
wholesome as she’d like it to.
She’d never dated someone who wasn’t out. And she’d
always told herself she wouldn’t. Aster liked to show o the
woman she was dating. She wanted the entire restaurant to
know that she’d bagged someone beautiful, someone who
made her heart sing.
But tonight, that may not happen, and it was something
she would have to accept. She’d agreed to give Eden time to
figure this all out, to process it all when she was good and
ready, but she already itched to kiss her in the street. Slip her
hand to Eden’s backside as they walked together. Public
displays of a ection didn’t frighten her in the slightest.
Okay. Play it cool. Go slow. Give her time. That was the
logical thing to do. If Aster got too comfortable with this,
Eden could break her heart. Yes, this was a date—she
assumed—but it was also a chance to get to know one
another on a di erent level. Something more intimate. It
didn’t mean they were together or that they would end up
marrying one another. It meant that they wanted to eat
dinner together. Maybe see where things went. You have to
remember that. Protect your heart…while holding hers.
A white cab pulled up outside the restaurant. Aster
couldn’t see who was inside, the windows were tinted, but
her body told her it was Eden. It told her that she was about
to go on a date with a woman who was a million miles from
what she thought she’d ever be lucky enough to date. The
door opened, and Aster knew immediately who those
slender, tanned legs belonged to.
H-holy shit. Eden stepped out, her long dark tresses
flowing down the front of her shoulders. And she wore the
dress. Aster swallowed hard before Eden caught her eyes,
smiling as she gripped her clutch bag in her hands.
“Hi.” Eden had gone for false eyelashes tonight. But they
weren’t too much. Just the right length. They only brought
out the definition in her eyes further. The dark makeup
surrounding them had Aster squeezing her thighs together.
She was a sucker for a woman with come to bed eyes. “I’m
not late, am I?”
Aster distracted herself, looking at her watch. “Nope.
Right on time.”
“Okay, good.” Eden stepped closer, pressing a kiss to
Aster’s cheek.
Okay, not what I was hoping for…but it’ll do.
“You look remarkable.” Aster refrained from taking
Eden’s hand, instead shoving her own in her pockets. If she
didn’t keep them out the way, they would be trailing Eden’s
body for the world to see. “And you don’t know how happy I
am that you actually showed up.”
Eden wore a slight frown. “You thought I’d stand you
up?”
“I…can’t believe we’re going to dinner together. So, yeah.
It kinda was at the back of my mind.”
“Well, I’m here. And I’m looking forward to having
dinner with you. Should we go in?”
“Definitely.” Aster opened the door, holding it for Eden.
“After you.” Eden o ered a shy smile, passing by Aster. But
it hadn’t been the best idea. Aster’s eyes were now firmly
glued to Eden’s arse. “Did, uh…did you go into the o ce
today?” She shook herself from her thoughts, aware that she
was almost drooling.
“No. I stayed home and got ready for tonight.” Eden
glanced over her shoulder as they waited to be seated. “I may
have had a slight panic, but I’m fine now.”
“Why did you panic?” The same reason as you. Don’t
pretend you’ve been cool all day.
“This is all very new to me. I’ve never been to dinner with
a woman before. I mean, I have, but not like this.” Eden
smiled, interrupted by the waiter.
Once seated, Aster lifted the menu, unsure as to what was
and wasn’t acceptable this evening. If Eden wasn’t worried
about people seeing her, she surely would have taken Aster’s
hand, perhaps linked arms as they made their way inside.
The not knowing was frustrating.
She lowered her menu. “Hey, so I was wondering what’s
what with us tonight?”
“I don’t understand.” Eden’s eyes remained on the menu.
“Like, are we here as friends, so to speak? A business
meal, I don’t know…”
“A business meal?” This time Eden did look up from her
menu, confusion etched on her face. “Why would we be
having a business meal?”
“What I’m asking is…am I to keep my hands to myself?
Do I have to avoid anything that would be considered
flirting?”
Eden’s face morphed into a look Aster wasn’t sure she
recognised. Fear? Apprehension? “I-I…” She looked around
the restaurant, and then her eyes landed back on Aster. “I
don’t know. I hadn’t thought about it.”
Aster held up a hand. It didn’t matter. What counted was
that they were here at all. “You don’t need to worry about it.
I completely get it.”
Eden sighed. “It’s not that I don’t want to…”
“Eden, it’s okay.” She o ered a genuine smile. She didn’t
want Eden to feel uncomfortable. “Should we order some
wine?”
“Yes, okay.” Eden lowered her eyes, closing them
momentarily as she shook her head. Aster knew she wasn’t
supposed to notice it, but she did. “You choose. I don’t mind
what we have.”
Aster cleared her throat, sitting up straight. “No pressure
here, okay?”
Eden nodded, the smallest of smiles playing on her lips.
“Thank you.”
“Now. Let’s eat, drink, and enjoy ourselves.” Aster took
the lead. She had to remember that Eden was putting things
on the line here tonight.
“You look gorgeous, by the way.” Eden’s eyes pinned
Aster, her focus not wavering.
“Thanks.”
Eden slid her credit card into the leather wallet, placing it on
the edge of the table. Dinner had been exceptional, the
company even better, but now it was over. What was she
supposed to do? She didn’t want it to end. Aster had been the
perfect date, and the fact that she was willing to understand
Eden and her predicament meant the absolute world to her.
It hadn’t gone unnoticed.
“Eden, let me at least pay for half of it.” Aster slid her
hand across the table, pulling it back when she realised what
she was doing. Eden would love to hold her hand, but she
wasn’t quite there yet. Not in public, anyway. “Sorry.”
“I asked you to dinner. That’s the end of it.”
Aster smiled. “Well, thank you. It was lovely.”
“So you know, I’m fully expecting you to invite me to
dinner in the not-too-distant future.” Eden sat back in her
seat, her fingers stroking the stem of her wine glass. “Since
I’m not impressed that this date is over.”
Aster shrugged. “Doesn’t have to be.”
Oh, God. She’s going to suggest her place…or mine. “I have an
early start tomorrow.” That was a complete lie, and Eden felt
awful as it slid so easily from her mouth. Don’t do that. Aster
wouldn’t appreciate it.
“Oh.” Aster sunk back against her seat. “Well, maybe
another time then. I was looking forward to a walk along the
dock.”
Eden’s eyebrows rose with surprise. “You wanted to take
a walk?”
“Mmhmm. But I’m sure we can do it again. Maybe I need
to check you don’t have plans the following morning first…”
Could she backtrack? Take Aster up on her o er of a walk?
“I mean, I could walk with you.”
The waiter appeared, a single nod in Eden’s direction as
he took the leather wallet. Eden focused back on Aster,
watching her intently.
“You said you needed to get home.”
“I suppose I should take what I can get with you. I have a
packed week coming up, and I’m away for four days of it.”
“Anywhere nice?” Aster asked, her tone holding an
element of disappointment. But Eden felt the same. Not
seeing Aster through the week was kinda shitty in her book,
too.“Business trip.”
“It’ll be nice to get out of the o ce.” Aster pushed her
chair back when the waiter returned with Eden’s credit card.
“You must get bored sitting there all day.”
“Until recently, yes.”
“Something changed around the place?” Aster asked, her
eyebrow quirked as she stood. She never once took her eyes
o Eden.
“New sta . Kinda nice. Very pretty. I have a bit of a thing
for them.”
Aster smirked. “Well, I hope they treat you right.”
“So far, so good.”
They left the restaurant together, side by side as they
crossed the road and headed for the bright lights of the dock.
The temperature was around the average for the time of
year, but Eden had brought a wrap with her this time. She
wouldn’t have Aster shivering again.
“Maybe we could walk along the front?”
“Okay.” Eden followed, careful of her heels on the
cobbled pavement as they entered the dock gates. As they
reached an even surface, the sound of the water lapping
against the wall, Eden linked her arm through Aster’s. It was
quiet with not many people about. “Thanks for a lovely
evening, Aster.”
“Thanks for inviting me to dinner.”
“I’d like to think we can do it again, but if you don’t want
to, that’s perfectly fine. I wouldn’t expect you to hide who
