My lips part to argue, but I quickly find that I don’t have any words. Instead, a massive lump clogs my throat and red-hot tears fill my eyes once more.

  “Thank you,” I force out, my voice rough with emotion before the catch clicks closed and I fall back against the door, dropping my face into my hands.

  My body trembles as I suck in shaky breaths and images from the past two days flicker through my mind as clearly as if I’m watching a movie.

  If only I’d done the right thing and refused to meet Ant on Friday night.

  I knew we were going to get caught. I knew we were on borrowed time. But that still wasn’t enough to stop me from putting him at risk.

  And then there’s Daemon.

  A part of me is glad that it wasn’t Nico who found me. But it’s not a very big part.

  It could have been Alex, or Toby, or Seb. They wouldn’t have freaked out quite as badly. They might have helped me escape. They certainly wouldn’t have dragged me out, drugged me and locked me away in their lair. Okay, so Alex might have. But at least he wouldn’t have…

  “Fuck,” I breathe as more and more regrets slam into me.

  Finally, I push from the door, let Daemon’s shirt flutter to the floor and shove my borrowed knickers to my ankles, wincing at what my life has been reduced to this weekend.

  I was already keeping enough secrets from my best friends, and now they’re only growing. And I’ve just dragged Brianna right into the thick of it.

  Turning the shower on, I step under the water long before it has time to warm up. My need to wash my mistakes away, his scent from my body too much to deny.

  I gasp as the ice-cold water literally takes my breath away, but I force myself to stay there to endure the pain of my mistakes.

  Squeezing my eyes closed as the water begins to heat up, images of Daemon sleeping peacefully on his bed fill my mind.

  My hands tremble as I vividly remember crushing up those pills and watching him drink them without even questioning me. Guilt assaults me, twisting up my stomach until I have no choice but to rush from the cubicle, drop to my knees and heave into the toilet.

  My stomach convulses, expelling the breakfast Daemon fed me a few hours ago. The memories of how sweet he was as he cared for me in his own dark way bring more tears to my eyes.

  “Calli?” Bri shouts. “Are you okay?”

  My entire body trembles and I rest my brow against the toilet seat, feeling weak and hopeless.

  “Yeah,” I call back weakly.

  “Calli,” she warns, aware that I’m lying to her.

  Sitting back and wiping my mouth with the back of my hand, I blow out a breath.

  “I’m okay.” Thankfully, my voice comes out a little stronger this time, almost strong enough to convince her.

  “Dinner will be ten minutes,” she tells me, but something tells me it’s not what she really wants to say.

  “Okay, I'll be out in a bit.”

  “You want me to go and kick his arse into next week?” she offers, making a smile pull at my lips.

  The image of her storming over to his and doing just that is too amusing to ignore. Well, until I remember that he’s probably still out cold and unable to defend himself.

  “It’s okay. I can handle it.”

  It’s a lie. A huge fucking lie. When he wakes and comes after me… a shudder rips down my spine.

  I thought he was bad that night as he marched me away from Ant and pinned me back against the car. Anger like I’ve never experienced came off him in waves, but I fear I’ve barely scratched the surface of Daemon’s depravity—and, if his words are anything to go by over the past few days—his obsession.

  The things he said to me about being the only girl he’s ever seen, about not wanting anyone else since he was six years old.

  Pushing to my feet, I stumble back toward the still-running shower and tip my face to the water.

  A million and one questions spin around my head, but the most pressing are around the things he said about wanting me, watching me, craving me.

  It was bullshit… right?

  He’s never so much as looked my way, ever. He barely even spends time with the guys, let alone knows I exist.

  Forcing thoughts of him out of my head, I grab my shampoo and set about washing him from my body, too.

  I want to say I feel better as I pull on a pair of leggings and an oversized hoodie, but I don’t. My head and my heart are still both wrecked over the events of the past forty-eight hours, and it’s more than obvious that it shows on my face when I step back out into the main living area of my new basement home.

  Bri’s smile drops as I walk toward her, my eyes locked on the containers she’s laying out on my kitchen counter.

  “Please, don’t look at me like that. Trust me, I know I fucked up. I don’t need to read it on your face.”

  “Wha— I’m not. No. I don’t think— I don’t even know what’s happened,” she argues.

  “Pretty sure you’ve figured out the basics,” I mutter, stealing a spring roll and ripping it in half with my teeth.

  “Things often aren’t as simple as they seem. You’ve met your family and the people surrounding you, right?” she says, trying to make light of the situation.

  “Sadly,” I confess, beginning to load up a plate with more food than I’d probably be able to eat in a week but not giving two shits about being a pig.

  Without another word, I walk over to the sofas and lower my plate to my lap, ready to dive in and lose myself in my favourite comfort food.

  I never lose Brianna’s attention, but equally, she doesn’t say any more. She just places a glass of prosecco in front of me and then makes herself comfortable on the sofa opposite me with her own food.

  To start with, the silence is blissful, but it doesn’t take long before it changes and the need to talk about what I’ve done becomes too much to ignore.

  “You won’t tell them, will you?” I ask, my eyes begging hers.

  “No,” she says instantly, making my whole body relax. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t think you should tell someone. How long has this been going on for?”

  I shake my head, wishing there was a simple explanation for all of this.

  “Th-there… there isn’t anything going on. This weekend was a one-off.” Lie. “It was a mistake.”

  Her attention never wavers from me. It’s as if she’s hoping to read all the things I’m not saying in the depths of my eyes.

  “Calli, I…” She lets out a loud sigh. “I’m not even going to pretend that I have any clue what’s going on here, but from what I’ve seen, I think you’re playing with fire.”

  I can’t help but laugh at her words.

  “You think?” I blurt. “Nico will—“

  “Need to get over himself. His protective-big-brother shit is cute and all, but fuck, girl. I can’t imagine how insufferable that must be.”

  I shrug. I guess it seems that way to someone who’s not in the middle of it. But it’s my life, Nico is my brother, and deep down I know he only wants the best for me. And it’s all I’ve ever known. He’s an overbearing prick that I got used to a long time ago.

  “Unless you’re doing it on purpose,” she offers.

  “What? No. He might be a royal pain in my arse, but I’d never do anything to actually hurt him. Not on pur…” My words trail off as I realise it’s a lie.

  I’ve been seeing Ant for months. Sneaking in and out of his room at the warehouse. It may never have been a strike back at Nico, but I’ve never been under any illusion that he would be happy about it. Hell, I knew that Nico would kill Ant the second he found out, yet I’ve still been unable to stop.

  “I wouldn’t blame you if you were. Sometimes, guys like that need teaching a lesson. I’m just not sure doing so right under his feet—literally—is the best way forward.”

  “Nico is Nico. None of us have any kind of chance at teaching him a lesson. He’s stubborn as a mule.”

  “You got that fucking right,” she mutters, making me smile on the outside while my inside cringes hard, knowing that she’s been with him, having seen the push and pull they're currently in the middle of.

  Silence stretches between us once more as we continue to eat. I want to enjoy it, stuff my face until all I can think about is how much of a pig I am and how full my belly is. But I can’t. Because while thoughts of him continue to float around my mind, my appetite is pretty much non-existent.

  “I can’t believe you ended up with him. Especially when Alex has been following you around like a little sad puppy for weeks,” she finally says.

  I glare at her, really wanting to not go there, but fearing she’s not going to give me any option now she knows the truth.

  “It’s complicated.”

  “Oh, trust me. I get it. Just one question though.”

  “Fine,” I sigh, hoping she means that and isn’t going to ask a million the second I answer her.

  “Why isn’t he here knocking your door down? You ran away, and I don’t get the impression any of those boys let anything slip through their fingers like that.”

  Without instruction from my brain, I look over my shoulder at the external door we walked through, and then the sliding glass panels that look out over the sunken garden beyond.

  My stomach knots with anxiety as to whether they’re all locked. It’s pointless. They always are. But still, the thought of him turning up here after what I did makes my stomach bottom out.

  He’s going to kill me when he catches up with me.

  A bolt of fear strikes through me, but it’s quickly followed by something else. Something I really shouldn’t be feeling. Excitement.

  “Do you want him?”

  “That’s a second question,” I point out, quirking a brow at her.

  She rolls her eyes. “Sorry, I just—”

  “It doesn’t matter what I want,” I confess sadly.

  Her lips part to ask another question, I’m sure, but thankfully, she thinks better of it.

  “I love those makeup bags over there. Have you been making them?” she asks, diverting the questions to my new hobby.

  Pushing thoughts of boys that I shouldn’t think about let alone find myself anywhere near aside, I focus on the little bit of my life that actually makes me happy right now.

  8

  CALLI

  Reluctantly, Brianna left after Jodie started blowing up her phone, wanting to know who she’d been distracted by. I could see in her eyes that really, she wanted to stay and try to drag some more information out of me, but I wasn’t having any of it. As far as I’m concerned, the less anyone knows about the shitshow that is my life right now, the better.

  I don’t need anyone’s judgy eyes or opinions over how I’ve managed to make some seriously questionable decisions in the past few months.

  With my tablet clutched to my chest, I climb into bed as memories of Halloween night come back to me.

  The second he touched me, it was like nothing I’d ever felt before.

  I want to say that things would have gone differently if I’d known who it was, if I were able to see through the mask and to the danger that was lurking beneath. But I couldn’t. I was too drunk, too determined to break out of my innocent little life, and I jumped in without considering the consequences.

  I just wish I could regret it. But I can’t. Those few minutes in that dark room, even without knowing who I was with… It was everything. The excitement, the recklessness, the desire. All of it brought me to life in a way I’d never experienced before, and I was there for it. Hell, clearly, I’m still fucking here for it, because I fell headfirst into him this weekend despite what he had just done. Despite the fact that he’d barely said two words to me since that night.

  I’m a fool. I know I am. Wishing for something that’s never going to happen.

  We can’t be together, I know that.

  Not only would we never work, Nico and Theo, my parents, would never allow it.

  They all have very solid ideas about who I’m going to end up with, and while Daemon might be an invaluable member of the Family, I know he’s not who any of them would put me with to pop out little soldiers for my dad and brother to train.

  I let out a pained sigh as I wake my tablet up and log into the secret account I have to message Ant.

  My heart pounds and my hands tremble as the app opens up.

  I have no idea what happened after Daemon marched me out of his room. All I know is that he shot him. My initial reaction was that he killed him, but as the hours have passed since, there’s something inside me that wants to believe he didn’t.

  Daemon might be a lot of things, but he’s not stupid. He’ll have known that I’d never forgive him if he did kill him.

  But does he care enough?

  All the air rushes from my lungs as I stare at our brief conversation from Friday night and find nothing new.

  “No,” I whimper. “No, please.”

  Calli: Ant? Are you okay? Please, please tell me you’re okay? I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.

  A tear splashes on my screen as I hit send and just stare, praying it’s going to be delivered. That it’s going to be read.

  But it never is.

  Abandoning my tablet, I drop my head into my hands and sob.

  My eyes barely respond when I try to open them when I come to some time later. They’re swollen and they hurt. And as I roll onto my back to stare up at the ceiling, I realise that’s only the tip of the iceberg, because my entire body aches. My inner thighs pull and my core… that’s sore in a way I’ve never felt before.

  My cheeks heat as I remember staring up at Daemon as he thrust into me, claiming my virginity like he actually believed it belonged to him.

  I sigh, closing my eyes once more, wishing I could drift back off into the nothingness that sleep offers me.

  Unfortunately, I don’t get anything close to that kind of peace, because my tablet starts ringing somewhere on the bed.

  With a frustrated huff, I throw the covers back and start searching.

  I cringe when I find a video call with Stella awaiting me. I have no idea what I look like—probably the back end of a dead rhino—but something tells me that ignoring her will be worse.

  Swiping the screen to connect the call, I grunt, “Morning,” as I fall back down on my pillows.

  “Anyone would think you spent all weekend partying,” she says with a laugh.

  “If only,” I groan, fighting like hell to keep images of what my weekend really was like from my head. “What’s up?”

  “Nothing. Just checking you’re still alive. You kinda went off-grid.”

  Shit.

  “Uh… yeah. I just needed a weekend to myself, you know? I had tons of work to do and—“

  “It’s totally cool. Things have been a bit… crazy this weekend, anyway.”

  “Oh yeah?” I mutter, already knowing that she’s only going to give me the CliffsNotes of what’s actually happened. It seems even my new best friends don’t think I can handle the whole truth these days.

  “Shit, Cal,” she sighs, regret laced through her tone. “It’s not that I didn’t want to tell you. The Boss said—“

  “I get it, okay? It’s my life.”

  “Jodie and Joanne were abducted by Jonas after he escaped, and the Italians helped orchestrate the whole thing.”

  “What?” I blurt, sitting bolt upright.

  “Yeah, I know. It’s fucked up.”

  “Is Jodie okay?” I ask. “Toby?”

  “Yeah, everyone is good. Well, aside from that motherfucking cunt and his little Italian friend.”

  “He’s gone?” I breathe, even more relieved than I expected to be at finally hearing that news.

  “Yup. We’ve finally sent him on his one-way trip to hell. Toby blew that house sky high.”

  “He… he blew up…”

  “Jodie’s house.”

  “Christ.”

  “It’s over, that’s all that matters. They’re gonna set Joanne up in a flat downstairs.”

  I nod, trying to imagine how they might be feeling right now.

  “When did all this happen?”

  “Friday night.” I swallow nervously as understanding dawns as to why Daemon was in the Italians’ warehouse then. “I’m sorry we didn’t tell you more. We knew the Italians were involved and that they were potentially watching us. Damien and your dad demanded we all be as normal as possible.”

  “Normal?” I balk, trying to push past the fact that they’d all lied to me. “If you all started acting normal then they’d know something was wrong.”

  “Oh, shush you.”

  “What’s happening with the Italians?” I ask, needing something, anything that might help me discover what happened to Ant. It’s not like I can just head over there and ask.

  “Honestly, I don’t really know the details, but the guys went and raided their little hangout on Friday night. Took a couple of their key guys hostage in the hope of delivering a message. I dunno what they’re really planning to make it look like they’ve got the biggest dicks. What I do know is that they all came back looking like they’d been to war.”

  “They killed them?” I ask, the blood visibly draining from my face, making me wish she hadn’t video called me. I might be getting better at hiding things, keeping my secrets, but I have zero game face.

  “I don’t think anyone died, no. There are going to be a few suffering from the ambush, though, if the amount of blood on the guys was anything to go by.”

  My lips part as a million questions dance on the end of my tongue about the events of Friday night, but I quickly swallow them all down for fear of giving too much away.

  “Cal, are you okay? You look a little… pale.” Her eyes dart around my face and I panic, lifting my hand up to cover my neck. From how bright those hickeys were when I stood in front of the bathroom mirror yesterday, I know there’s no way they’ve miraculously vanished overnight.

  “Yeah, I just didn’t sleep very well,” I lie. Truth is, I slept like the freaking dead. It was probably a mistake. I should be sleeping with one eye open from now on, waiting for Daemon to strike back. I have no doubt he will. He’s known as the boogeyman within the Family. The one who is likely to sneak up on you when you least expect it. He’s deadly, brutal, the exact opposite of the person you want coming after you in the dark.

 

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