Synth, p.42
Synth, page 42
The monotone-looking female snorted at my words, and despite my best intentions to ignore her, I turned and glared.
“But that doesn’t mean we can’t effectively remove threats or help you,” I said stiffly, and her eyes narrowed at me. “There are other ways to immobilize Reborn that don’t involve firearms.”
“Don’t worry about gear.” Warren’s voice sounded to my right, and I turned to look at him. “We have other connections for that. We can spare you both rifles for the night so you won’t have to use your firearms. They won’t be new, but they’ll work.”
“Thanks,” I said, my voice coming out much softer than I had meant it to. I cleared my throat, tugging my eyes away from him as a nervous flutter stirred in the pit of my stomach.
“I can make the drops this week,” Hawthorne offered to Warren, and everyone in the cave turned to look at him. “I know it probably isn’t your preference, but if Corvus can’t make it, I can do it. At the very least, you’re going to need copies of these maps.”
My eyes flicked between the two men, silence ringing through the cave as Warren stared at Hawthorne, then, to my relief, slowly nodded.
“Alright. Do you remember the way here?”
“No,” Hawthorne admitted, a sheepish smile crossing his lips. “She’s the one with the good memory, but I’ll pay attention when we leave.”
“I can meet you closer to the road.”
“Alright. I can drop off copies of all this tomorrow afternoon so you can start planning right away. Once we get more assembled, Corvus can coordinate another drop time.”
“Okay,” I said, nodding in agreement. “Then let’s get to work.”
We packed up our stuff, agreeing to keep in touch and play things by ear throughout the week while Orion worked with Eridanus to finalize the plan and Hawthorne and I did everything we could to help without drawing more attention to ourselves. Orion told us he would have everything ready for Friday, and Warren would give us the final details.
I shook his hand just like last time, then turned with Hawthorne to leave. Everything was happening so quickly it felt surreal. I didn’t feel ready, and I couldn’t shake the uneasiness lingering in my bones. I was glad that Warren didn’t seem to be angry anymore, and yes, it was great to know that he didn’t hate me, but things still felt off.
I walked by Hawthorne’s side toward the mouth of the cave, my helmet hanging loose from my fingertips, only for my grip to instantly tighten when I heard Warren’s voice.
“Corvus!”
I turned, pausing just outside the cave in the rain, squinting through the dim light of the afternoon that filtered through the thick clouds and stung my face. Warren was moving toward me, and when his eyes flicked to Hawthorne, I felt him shift away from my side and saunter further out onto the rocks.
“I nearly forgot. I’ve got your gear bag,” Warren said, holding up the empty canvas material. “It will save you needing to grab another for the drops this week.”
“Thanks.”
I took the bag and shivered as his warm fingers brushed against mine. I opened my mouth to say something, but I didn’t know what to say, so I closed it. Even if we were completely alone with no one to hear our exchange, I still don’t think I would have found any words.
We needed to talk about what had happened. We both knew that. I could see it written all over his face as we awkwardly stood there, his eyes circling my exposed face like he was hoping it might have some clue as to what the hell we were supposed to do now. I swallowed, wondering what he was thinking and if he, too, felt the desperate pull that made me want to reach for him.
“You should put your helmet on,” he finally said. It felt like an odd thing to say, but then he took a small step forward, and his voice dropped lower. “I know it’s the rainy season, Valya, but it still stresses me out whenever you take it off outside during the day.”
“Alright,” I said, and I couldn’t help the small smile that touched my lips. “I will – but I promise you I’m fine. We don’t burst into flames and instantly die if the sun comes out.”
“Well, then you can explain all the technicalities of how it works to me,” Warren said, giving me a small smile. “But later. You need to get some sleep. This is going to be a long week.”
“I know.” I forced myself to step back, even though I didn’t want to leave. “I’ll text you later.”
He nodded, and I turned away, stuffing my helmet on my head but leaving the visor up so it didn’t feel so suffocating as I moved toward Hawthorne’s side. We walked across the rocks in silence, only the sound of the rain and wind tugging at our clothes filling the air until we hit the trees.
“So you really did patch things up with Aries then, huh?”
I frowned, not liking the teasing tone of his voice.
“Yes, I told you that I had.”
“Mhmm,” Hawthorne mused, flipping up his visor now that we were under the shadows of the trees so I could see his face as he turned to look at me. “But you didn’t tell me that you guys were that friendly.”
“We’re not.”
“Pfft,” he scoffed. “Yes, you are.”
“Aren’t you supposed to be paying attention to the trail?” I countered. “You have to find your way back here on your own, you know.”
“I’ll be fine.” Hawthorne waved his hand, turning to give me a sly grin. “Your human said he would come meet me by the road, which was rather nice of him considering how things went last time. What did you do? Talk me up? Tell him I’m not just handsomely good-looking but that I am, in fact, rather skilled and incredibly useful as a partner?”
“You’re ridiculous.” I rolled my eyes, but discomfort was starting to itch across my skin. “I told him you were a good asset to the mission, but now I’m seriously regretting those words.”
Hawthorne laughed, and I mentally crossed my fingers that this would be the end of his prying, but it wasn’t.
“So… you two seem pretty comfortable with each other.”
“I’ve been working with him for months, Hawthorne.” A tone of warning rang in my voice. “Of course I’ve gotten to know him.”
“Does he always worry about you?” His words made me falter, my feet stumbling across the slick moss-covered ground as I fought to keep my face impassive. “Because it’s sort of adorable and also hilarious that he thought you might burst into flames.”
“He doesn’t know that much about us,” I said, voice stiff as I regained my footing and hoped he would just drop the topic. The last thing I needed was for him to think there was something going on between us, which there was, but that was beside the point.
“Maybe not, but he seems to know a bit about you.”
I scoffed. “And how do you figure that?”
“Your reaction just confirmed it.” He sounded pleased with himself. “So, do you two hang out when you drop off supplies or—”
“Can you cut it out?”
“Personally, I think it’s rather cute that you like him so much,” Hawthorne said, and even though his voice was light and laced with playfulness, all my muscles tensed at his words. “Though he is ridiculously short – but I suppose not for you. It must be nice not having to constantly look up. I’m going to have to watch it, or you’re going to get a crush on him, and I really will lose my shot.”
I stopped, memories from twenty-four hours ago flooding my mind. The taste of his lips. The feel of his warm hands against my skin. And the horrible mix of nervous excitement and sickness returned as if it had never left.
“That’s not funny,” I whispered, my hands clenching at my sides.
“Oh come on, Gorski, I’m just—”
“Stop.” I turned to glare at him as my voice started to shake. “I asked you to stop. So just stop, okay? How hard is it for you to let this go? Why do you always give me such a hard time!”
My voice had risen, and I had all but screamed the last few words at him. He stopped moving, his body going completely still.
“I was just teasing, Valya.”
He looked confused, and to my horror, my eyes started to burn. I wanted to throw up again. A part of me wanted to go back in time and stop that kiss from ever happening, while a huge portion of me wanted to see where it could have led if my partner hadn’t called and interrupted us. I blinked, dropping my gaze to the ground as I tried to regain control. I really was pushing things—both physically and mentally—if I was about to cry two days in a row.
Reborn didn’t usually cry, not unless severely injured, so to say this was concerning was an understatement.
“Valya—”
He stepped forward, but I stepped back, refusing to look up at him.
“Let’s just go. We need to get back and get to work.”
I made to leave, but Hawthorne grabbed my arm.
“Hey!” He pulled, and I glared up at him as he spun me around. “I didn’t know.”
“Didn’t know what?” I spat, ripping my arm from his grasp. “That you’re incredibly annoying?”
“That you actually like him.”
I stilled.
“It’s okay,” he said, his voice cautious. He raised both hands as if he was trying to steady my racing heart. “I tease you all the time, and you’ve never once gotten angry about it because we both know I’m just screwing around, and it doesn’t mean anything. I know you, and you only ever get angry when something truly matters to you.”
I swallowed, my legs beginning to tremble as I watched him search my face.
“It’s okay,” he repeated, and I felt a tear break loose from the corner of my eye. “I wouldn’t have said anything if I knew. I – I thought there was something weird going on after I met him because he seemed so horrible and you were so stressed out, but I didn’t think it was this. I wouldn’t have joked about it if I knew you liked him.”
I nodded, dropping my gaze to his chest.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s alright.” I cleared my throat, forcing the rest of the tears down along with the bile that had come with it. “I’m fine.”
“Are you sure?” He sounded skeptical. “Because you don’t look alright.”
“Gee, thanks.”
“That’s not what I mean,” he said with a sigh. “I mean, are you – is it – do you want to talk about it?”
“No, I don’t want to talk about it!” I groaned.
“Well, I don’t know!” Hawthorne raised his hands again in defeat. “I’ve never been in this situation! I have no idea how to handle it. That’s part of why I was teasing you about it because it seemed like such an insane scenario.”
“I’m aware of how insane it is,” I said, turning away from him to keep walking back to the road. “Thank you for highlighting that fact.”
“Hey, I’m not judging.” Hawthorne fell into step by my side. “They really don’t seem all that different from us, and you’ve spent a lot of time with him, as you said. It just – it just seems complicated.”
“No kidding,” I muttered.
We walked in silence for a few minutes, Hawthorne no doubt questioning my sanity as I pondered if it was possible for a Reborn to die of stress.
“So, have you—”
“Do not ask that question.”
“What? No!” Hawthorne sputtered, looking at me in shock. “I was just going to ask if you’ve told him or if he knows! And you say I’m the inappropriate one.”
“You are the inappropriate one, and I don’t know.”
“How do you not know if you’ve told him?”
“No, I don’t know if he knows,” I said. “We haven’t had the chance to talk about what happened.”
He slowed, and I could feel his eyes on the side of my helmet again.
“And it was nothing like that,” I said, turning to glare at him. “So get your mind out of the gutter.”
“I didn’t even say anything.”
“You don’t have to, I know how your brain works.”
We walked in silence until we reached the edge of the woods and navigated toward my car. I tried not to think about the dried mud that covered both front seats as I opened the driver’s door or how I hadn’t even noticed that we were filthy when we’d left the ditch and raced out here. We’d been in such a hurry it hadn’t even crossed my mind. I would need to clean this out, but I doubted I would have the time before work, so I’d have to just throw in a dozen air fresheners and cover the seats with a sheet.
I sighed, falling into my car and turning the key to start the engine.
“I wasn’t lying, you know?” Hawthorne said as we both tossed our helmets onto the backseat.
“Lying about what?” I turned to look at him as I put the car in drive.
“About not judging you,” he said, but this time his voice was low, and his expression had grown serious. “I don’t. You’re my friend, Valya, and I’ll support you no matter what. I know you don’t want to talk about it, and that’s fine, but I am here if you want to talk about it. And I won’t tease you about him again.”
I stared at him in the refreshing dark of my car, a small, exhausted smile pulling at my lips.
“Thanks, Theo,” I said, and his eyes creased as he smiled. “You’re a good friend.”
twenty-five
Countdown
Tuesday, October 27
6:12 pm
The noise of a key scratching in the lock jolted my attention from the screen. My eyes went wide, my head turned, and my slow, steady pulse quickened as the door opened—only for it to relax as Hawthorne’s voice filled the air.
“Hey, you’re supposed to be sleeping,” he said, dropping his small gear bag on the floor so he could unlace his boots. “Wasn’t that the point of me going out to crawl through the disgusting ditch all by myself?”
“It’s after 6 pm, Hawthorne,” I said, pausing the video and stretching my arms above my head. I turned in my seat to face him fully, noting the mud that covered the legs of his dark black pants and his boots. The rest of him looked soaked to the bone. “I did sleep. I slept for four hours. I just got up.”
He frowned. “That’s not enough.”
“Yes, well.” I shrugged, not bothering to argue because he was right. “This week isn’t enough to prepare, either, but it is what it is.”
“Isn’t that the truth.”
“Besides, I don’t have to go in as early tonight. Hakim confirmed we’re taking the Wednesday day shift for the Morin stakeout, and that doesn’t start until 9 am. I’ll head into the precinct just before 4 am, so I can always take a nap before then.”
“Uh-huh.”
He didn’t seem to believe me, which was fair. I would probably spend the remainder of my time crawling through footage for warehouse 236A and preparing the next set of information to be dropped off to Warren. Hawthorne let out a sigh as he kicked off his boots and made his way across the room toward me.
“So – did you do it?”
“Yes.” I nodded, taking the hard drive he handed me and gesturing for him to sit down. It didn’t matter that he was riddled in mud; my entire apartment had been a mess since our late return the day before. “Orion was right. I heard it on the radio on the drive in. I wasn’t even in the building for two seconds before I saw a poster about the OT sign-ups. Mallick must have had his day cut short. He was probably into work minutes after it hit the evening news. I added my name to the sign-up list before I even headed up to eleven, then stopped at Vogle’s office to let him know.”
“Did he mind?”
“No.” I shook my head. “He wasn’t surprised, either. He knows I still have close ties to Patrol and Street and figured I would want to help support them. Besides, I wasn’t the only detective to sign up. Apparently, a bunch of other “go-getters” volunteered. The city is going crazy over this. The news mentioned that the mayor is trying to get some emergency status passed to keep the streets locked down over the weekend, but the local businesses aren’t having it because Halloween is their busiest night until the winter holidays and they rely heavily on the income, so the CPD is under a lot of pressure to ensure things stay under control. Vogle said as long as Hakim didn’t mind, it was fine.”
“And I take it Hakim didn’t mind?”
I snorted, plugging the new hard drive into my computer to start the download.
“No – big shocker there,” I said, and I was unable to keep the bitterness from my voice. It worked out well for our mission that he didn’t care, but the reminder of how little he thought of me still stung. “He just told me to keep my phone on – that he would call if something happened and he needed my help, which I doubt he’ll do. As much as he seems to love calling me in and keeping me late, I’m convinced that’s only to try and drive me away, which sucks. Even after all this time, he’s still just trying to wear me down and get me to quit.”
“He’s a jerk,” Hawthorne said, his tone conveying even more dislike than my own. “But that’s fine. It works in our favour.”
“Exactly.” I nodded. “Even if he didn’t hate me, I doubt Vogle would have pushed to keep me on call anyway. With so many patrols scheduled, he isn’t exactly expecting many murders or crimes requiring full-scale investigations. It will likely be petty theft, protest confrontations, and disorderly conduct, none of which will be considered an emergency if riots break out downtown with the protestors. The bigger issue is crowd control.”
“No kidding.” Hawthorne leaned back in his seat and ran his hand through his hair. He looked just as tired as I felt, but I knew he would never complain. “If the turnout is anything like what my contact seems to think it will be, the core will be packed. I just hope things stay peaceful.”
“Me too.”
“Any word on placement yet?”
“Not yet, but I’m sure I’ll find out in a day or two.”
“Well, let’s hope that Eridanus’s contact can pull this off,” Hawthorne said, and I nodded in agreement. “Otherwise, Saturday is going to be even more difficult than it already is if you can’t be there.”
