Rodeo snow, p.15
Rodeo Snow, page 15
We took the bus across downtown while Corinne griped at me for not answering my phone. I didn’t turn it on a lot at that point since nobody called me but my parents. I was concentrating so much on Corinne that I almost missed Schwartz getting off. “C’mon,” I said, running after him.
He led us over this bridge, then under it. “Downtown shelter,” he announced proudly. There were beer cans and whiskey bottles everywhere.
“There’s no one here,” I said. The river looked industrial, like a cold stream of toxic waste. It was easy to imagine a dead body floating in it.
“This place is scary.” This was from Corinne, the girl who didn’t like people to think she was afraid of anything.
Schwartz whistled, then smiled toothlessly at us. “Wait,” he ordered. He disappeared through some bushes and didn’t come back. No one came for a long time.
“Let’s ditch him and get out of this place, “ Corinne said. “Maybe he just brought us here to rob us.”
“We don’t have much money,” I pointed out. “He knows that.”
“Yeah, well maybe he forgot. He doesn’t seem like he has the greatest memory. He almost ditched us on the bus.”
“I want my skates back. You can leave if you want.”
“Right. Like I’m going anywhere around here by myself.”
We waited a while longer, then the bushes rustled. “Who’s there?” Corinne asked.
“Billy?” I said. “Is that you?”
Billy walked out towards us looking like the cadaver I’d imagined at the river.
“Billy,” I got right to the point. “Why did you take my skates?”
“Huh?” he said.
“Great.” Corinne was exasperated but I wasn’t done yet.
“Did you sell them? You could live off those skates for a long time if you live under a bridge. Right ?” Billy just stared at me and Corinne gave me a look like I was being stupid to give him ideas. “You wanted to punish me, didn’t you? Like working on that fence with you wasn’t punishment enough.”
“Gene, you’re being kind of weird,” Corinne said.
“You just do really dumb things that get you in trouble and that leads to more trouble and then you have to have the nuns rescue you and now you think I’m going to just give up my skates without saying anything. Where are my skates?” My voice got louder.
“Dunno.” Billy turned to leave.
“Wait a minute.” I went after him and grabbed him, too frustrated to be afraid. “Where are my skates? I want my skates.” I shook him. It was like shaking a skeleton.
He looked like he did when I first met him: jittery and wild. Like a creature that had been caught and was trying to get away. He opened his mouth and howled.
“Stop it!” Corinne yelled. I let go even though I didn’t know which one of us she was talking to. I let go of Billy and any hope of ever getting my skates back.
Chapter 17: Beautiful Beast
Let’s get outta here.” Corinne tugged at my arm as I started to follow Billy into the bushes.
“I’m supposed to bring him back,” I insisted and pulled away from her. “And I want my skates.”
“He doesn’t have them,” she said, which stopped me cold.
“What? You don’t know that.” But I decided to follow her as she climbed up the river bank.
“Did you see them in his pack?” she asked, as we crossed the bridge.
“Uh, no,” I admitted. I hadn’t really noticed he’d had a pack at all.
She stopped as we got to the bus stop and put her hands on her hips. “You didn’t notice his pack did you?” she accused. “You were too into your insane interrogation game. You’re pretty psycho, Snow, no wonder no one wants to be around you.” She tossed her hair back and glared at me.
We got on the bus. She payed. Great, this was the closest I’d ever get to going on a date with Corinne Camden: visiting a bum hangout, her treat, and getting to hear how she thought I was psycho.
“No way did he have your skates in his pack.”
“What—do you have x-ray vision or something? They could have been hidden.”
“There wasn’t room.“ As she said this, I noticed there wasn’t room on the bus seat for both of us and our packs. My leg was touching hers. “His pack would barely hold a pair of baby booties.”
“He could have had them hidden at the bum camp,” I said, still mad at myself for missing the chance to go after him.
“Did you really want a bunch of crazy guys to attack us? I don’t know what’s the matter with you. It’s like you’re used to them or something.”
I was used to them. I spent more time with the bums at Loaves and Fishes and talked to them more than I did any of my former friends those days.
“Besides, I don’t think he has them.”
“Why?” Why couldn’t somebody helpful have been helping me? Like Lark or Andy.
“Because if you’d stop giving him your asinine theories you would have noticed that he didn’t know what you were talking about.” Corinne inched her leg away from me.
“Oh. Don’t you think that’s because he’s crazy?”
“You’re the one who’s crazy.” She got up to get off the bus.
The next time at Loaves and Ishes as Lily called it, I told Sister Jude I’d found Billy. “Is he here?” she asked, starting to walk out of the kitchen to see him.
“I saw him last week.” I watched her excitement turn to disappointment.
“Last week?” she said. “He could be anywhere by now.”
“Oh.” I hadn’t thought of that. “Maybe not. I could take you there.”
“The camp under the bridge?” she asked. “I’ve been there.”
“You’ve been there?” Why the hell she did she need me to help her?
“He won’t come out for me,” she explained.
“He doesn’t have my skates,” I repeated Corinne’s theory.
Sister Jude gave me this weird look, like all of the sudden she cared more about my skates than I did. “Of course he has your skates, Eugene, you just need to bring him back to me and I’ll get them for you.”
That night I trudged home, skateless as usual, full of fake mashed potatoes, creamed corn, and gravy. “Why is Sister Jude so weird about Billy?” I said as I walked in the door.
“Probably because he’s her weirdo brother,” Lily piped up from the living room.
“What?” I walked between her and the TV.
“Quiet,” she said. “My show’s on.”
“Lily.” I stood there. “What do you mean he’s her brother?” The laugh track on her show got louder like what I just said was hilarious.
“He’s her brother.” Lily sounded exasperated. “Everybody knows that.”
“I didn’t know that. How do you know that?”
“Move!” she said. “It’s my favorite part and I’m missing it.” I stepped out of the way and collapsed on the couch. How could everybody have known that and not me? When a commercial came on, I grabbed the remote and pressed mute.
“Hey!“ Lily protested. “That’s my favorite commercial!”
“You’ve seen that commercial a hundred times.”
“Mom!” she yelled.
Mom came in instead of lecturing us from another room like she usually did. “What’s going on here?” she asked.
“Lily says that everybody knows Sister Jude is Billy’s sister. Not nun type sister but his real sister.”
“Really? I didn’t know that.” Mom tilted her head, considering this. “Guess it makes sense though. She seems so worried about him.”
“How do you know that?” I asked Lily once more.
“I listen. Most of the time people don’t even know I’m there. That’s how I know everything,” she bragged.
I pulled out my pack to start my homework. Why didn’t Sister Jude ever tell me that Billy was her brother? If she knew where he was why didn’t she just go and drag him out? How was I ever gonna get my math homework done? My head was so full of questions I had a headache.
The next morning, Lark followed me out of first hour and said, “Gene, I am apprehensive about the Government test. May I come over tonight and study with you?”
I stopped and looked at her like I’d seen a ghost, a ghost with pink lip gloss and really good hair. You couldn’t stop in the halls at South. It was like stopping in the middle of the freeway during rush hour. I should’ve known, I’d done both. Somebody bumped into me and like a human domino I bumped into her. “Sorry.” I bent down to pick up the notebook I knocked out of her hand. “Uh sure,” I said, wondering was this really how it was done? They just got back together with you with no explanation at all like nothing had ever happened?
When Lark came over to study, my family was a little too happy to see her.
“Why, Lark,” Mom said, “We’ve missed you around here.”
“We’ve missed your chocolate,” Dad added.
“I’ve missed you too,” Lark said. “Especially Lily.” She put her arm around my little sister, who smirked at me.
We sat at the dining room table. I’d put my stuff there before Lark came so we could avoid the awkwardness of the couch. I was so nervous about having her there that I opened my book and immediately started quizzing her. She, of course, knew everything and didn’t really need to study. But we just kept working and going over everything, which had the effect of disappointing Lily, the eavesdropper.
We decided to reread a chapter and then go over it, but I was having a hard time concentrating. Lark had done something to her hair. It was the color of honey instead of that Barbie doll blonde. She smelled really good, as usual, but her makeup was different too, less dramatic. She looked less like a European model and more like a really hot teenage girl.
“What?” Lark looked up from her book.
“Nothing.” I felt my face go red and looked down.
“You looked like you were going to say something.”
Your ex-girlfriend who may not be the perfect one for you, but is this totally gorgeous girl who seems to be making an effort to be a real teenager instead of someone on the cover of Elle, gives you a chance, a chance to say just the right thing, the thing that will flush all the crap from the past down the toilet and let you start over again. What do you do?
A. Say “I was just noticing how beautiful you are,” as you gaze sincerely into her eyes.
B. Say “I wanted to say I’m sorry. How could I have ever looked at anyone else when I could be looking at you,” as you gaze sincerely into her eyes.
C. Don’t say anything. Just gaze sincerely into her eyes and lean over and kiss her.
These, of course, were the options of someone more sophisticated than me. “Nothing, ” I looked away and muttered. “Well, I’d better get to work on my math homework,” I added, still not daring to look at her.
“Oh,” she said, in this hurt voice, and closed her book. “I guess I’d better be going then.” She got up, put on her coat and headed for the door.
“Did you do something to your hair?” I blurted out as she was leaving.
“A while ago.” She put her fingers through it self-consciously.
“I like it,” I said. “It looks . . .” I paused trying to find just the right word . . .“nice.”
“Oh.” Her voice kind of quavered like she might start crying. Then she gave me this big lit-up smile. “Thanks.”
She closed the door. I turned to find Lily there. “You really blew it,” she said. “Don’t you want her to be your girlfriend?”
The next day I found out that it wasn’t up to me. Corinne and Andy were talking to me again, stopping by my locker which had once again become Lark’s and mine.
“Did you get your skates back yet?” Corinne asked me.
“No,” I said. I’d given up on my skates. All I wanted to do was to get out of Loaves and Fishes duty and avoid seeing Sister Jude for the rest of her twisted life.
During lunch, Corinne mentioned my skates again. “You know you should be practicing for the street comp this spring. You’ve got to get them back.”
I took a deep breath and told Corinne, Lark, and Andy about finding Billy and finding out about Sister Jude, leaving out the part about Corinne because I got the distinct impression she had never mentioned her involvement to these guys. “So I’m pretty sure Billy doesn’t have my skates and I have no idea why Sister Jude lied to me,” I told them.
“Doesn’t sound like she lied so much as she didn’t tell you everything,” Andy said. He was eating one of his favorite things for lunch: a peanut butter and ketchup sandwich. It’d been so long since I’d eaten with him, I’d forgotten that he put ketchup on everything.
“A sin of omission rather than commission,” Lark elaborated. All she was technically eating for lunch was an enormous apple. Except she kept stealing my potato chips.
“It’s a sin all right.” Corinne ignored Lark’s advanced English and the fact she and I were committing or omitting the same sin and stole some of my chips too.
“Hey!” I complained. I’d forgotten what it was like eating with those guys. Most of my eating experiences involved shoveling in whatever was in front of me, not sharing it with girls who pretended to themselves they were on a diet.
“You’ve got to confront her, Gene,” Corinne went on. “Tell her it’s a sin that she lied to you and accuse her of stealing your skates.”
“Wait a minute,” I said. “I’m pretty sure she didn’t steal my skates.”
“You’ve got to make her feel guilty even if she didn’t. She’s the only one who can get them back for you.” Corinne smiled a self-satisfied smile.
“No way,” I took a big gulp of pop and burped.
“Gross!” said Lark.
“Sorry.” I’d forgotten that I wasn’t at the table of the apes with Brady.
“I’ll go with you,” Corinne offered.
“Like you and Sister Jude are on such good terms,” I laughed. “I’ll go by myself.”
When we got up from lunch, Corinne and Andy walked in front of us with their arms around each other, which made me realize I didn’t have the slightest idea what I was supposed to do with Lark. Lark wasn’t helping. She just walked alongside of me, radiating awkward vibes, which were contagious.
“Uh, you know last night when I told you . . . you looked nice?” I asked Lark on the way to our locker.
“Yes?” She sounded interested in what I had to say which meant I must’ve been doing something right.
“I didn’t mean it.”
“Oh.” Lark looked shocked and started walking faster like she was trying to get away from me.
“Wait.” I ran to catch up with her as she reached our locker. “What I meant is you looked better than nice.”
“Oh.” She looked like she was going to cry.
I grabbed the book that she kept on the top shelf of the locker. I’d checked it out after she tried to hide it from me. It was her Dutch-to-English/English-to-Dutch dictionary. “I meant to say you look—uh—schepsel.” I found the word for beautiful.
Lark looked puzzled.
“Wildeman,” I added, figuring two words for beautiful were better than one.
She started laughing and tears ran down her face. “Gene, you just called me a beast.”
“Oops.” I looked again trying to get the right word. “Schoon? . . . beautiful.” I said. And I didn’t have to do anything more because she kissed me.
“You guys are disgusting.” Brady elbowed his way into our locker and everything seemed like it was back to normal.
Making up with Lark or maybe I should be honest and say making out with Lark, gave me the confidence to confront Sister Jude. I went over to the convent after school, walking around all of the spring puddles shimmering with car oil, wondering where in the hell I could find a dry place to skate anyway.
I took the stairs down to Sister Jude’s office and found her hunched over her desk. I had to clear my throat and cough to get her attention. “Eugene,” she said, “I’ve been meaning to call you.”
Right. I’d stopped believing anything Sister Jude said.
“Sit down.” She motioned me to a chair in front of her desk like she was the vice principal.
I stayed standing. “So Billy’s your brother.”
“You know my ministry with the homeless isn’t really because of Billy. It’s in spite of Billy.” She rattled off this defense statement without looking at me. Then she sighed. “I do good work with everyone except Billy. He won’t let me help him Eugene. I can’t get it through his thick skull that I’m only trying to help him.”
“Maybe someone else needs to help him.” I sat down even though I hadn’t planned on it. “My sister won’t let me help her,” I said. “Once I tried to teach her how to read and she grabbed the book and threw it at me.”
Sister Jude finally looked at me. “I thought you might be able to help him. You do have a mutual enemy.”
“Who—you?” I blurted out.
“Yes. You know, he told me that he thought you had a bad attitude toward me and he liked that.”
“I don’t really.” I was embarrassed at how I used to laugh when Billy made fun of her.
“He wasn’t that much older than you when he went to Vietnam.” Her eyes clouded over like she was somewhere else. “He was so smart and talented. Maybe he would have had problems anyway, I don’t know.” She reached down and opened her deep bottom desk drawer. “Here honey, these are for you.” She pulled out my skates, my long lost Shimas and dumped them on top of her desk. I just stared at them.
“How long have you had them?” I finally asked.
“I got them right after Schwartz talked to you. Schwartz tried to get Billy and the skates back but all he was able to do was take the skates.”
