A high platform, similar to the one they had all climbed with ease in the first task. It stood about twenty feet tall. “You need to climb this rope and then you descend via the netting on the other side.”

  All the while Juggernaut spoke, Spike couldn’t help but look at the dark entrance to the tunnel Ranger had talked about. He focused hard to see if he could hear the diseased. Nothing. Maybe there weren’t any in there.

  “This is the rat run.” Juggernaut walked from one end of the tunnel all the way to the other side. “Once you’ve crawled through here, you go back to the first obstacle and start again.”

  If he needed to, Spike could simply refuse to go in. When he glanced at Ranger, the boy winked and pointed at the tunnel. Sweat lifted beneath Spike’s shirt and he shook to think about what lay in wait for him in the hole. He’d just refuse. That was all he needed to do. There was no shame in it. Many of the cadets had done it already. He could blame it on claustrophobia.

  “The idea,” Juggernaut said, positioning himself so he stood in front of the cadets again, “is to keep going until the team behind you catches you. You need to get used to being chased. It’ll happen a lot over the next few months.”

  After letting the silence hang, Juggernaut said, “But this is a team event. You’ll go outside the wall as a team, so I want you to work as a team now. You all get through or none of you do. I’ll stagger your starts, fifteen seconds between each team. The way you take out the team ahead of you is for the last person in your team to touch one of the people in theirs. It’s not about being the fastest, it’s about being the most cohesive unit.”

  Although Juggernaut went on to explain more of the rules, Spike didn’t hear him, all of his attention on the dark holes at either end of the rat run. The day had a chill in the air, the grey clouds pregnant with the promise of rain. While he watched the holes, the temperature seemed to drop several more degrees.

  Spike would fake an injury. Nothing else for it. He could come up with some reason for not being able to do it so he didn’t let his team down by refusing to go into the hole. They could do the task without him. Then he looked at Ranger and his smug face, Lance beside him, also looking over. He’d never hear the end of it. It wasn’t like Juggernaut would allow it either. Injury or not, the diseased would still kill you outside the walls. Maybe they’d fail before they got to the tunnel anyway. No way could Hugh climb the wooden wall or the rope. No way.

  The crack of Juggernaut’s hands made Spike jump, which Ranger picked up on. Nudging Lance next to him, they both laughed. “Because it’s my task, my team goes first, followed by team Minotaur, who are the next closest in points.”

  Although Spike tried to fill his lungs, he still couldn’t get his breath in. Despite every urge in his body to resist, he followed his team and lined up in front of the wooden wall behind Bigfoot.

  Close enough to Ranger for the boy to lean back and say, “Me and Lance tested the tunnel out, didn’t we? My tip to you is to pull your arms in. You’ll still feel them pawing at you, but as long as you don’t give them something to grab onto, you should be fine.”

  While laughing, Lance nodded. “That’s a good tip. I would say close your eyes so you don’t have to look at them, but it’s darker than the devil’s arsehole down there, so it doesn’t matter.”

  Ranger nodded. “The devil’s arsehole. I like it, Lance.”

  Clearly lifted by Ranger’s comment, Lance stood slightly taller than he had a second ago. The boy lived for Ranger’s approval.

  “Look,” Hugh said, butting between Spike and the two boys, “why don’t you two leave him alone and focus on what you’ve got to do, yeah?”

  Hugh probably thought he was helping, but before any of them could say anything else, Juggernaut shouted, “Go!” While counting down from fifteen, he lined the rest of the teams up one behind the other. So distracted by Ranger, Spike hadn’t yet tried to look at Matilda. As always, when he finally did, she acted like he didn’t exist.

  Team Bigfoot—dressed from head to toe in their brown tracksuits—hit the wooden wall first. They must have had a chance to practice it because Ranger and Lance, the tallest two in the team, gave a boost to the shortest and weakest. Once they’d helped them, they jumped up and dragged themselves over the wooden wall too.

  Because of the wall, when team Bigfoot had slipped over the other side, Spike couldn’t see them. Now they were gone, he looked at the tunnel again. How would he avoid going through it? Maybe he imagined it, but as a gust of wind hit him, he could have sworn he smelled the vinegar tang of the rotting diseased.

  “Go,” Juggernaut shouted.

  It took for Hugh to shove Spike in the back to make him move. He ran for the wall to see Max reach it and wait for him. They copied team Bigfoot’s strategy, Spike standing opposite Max while they boosted Olga, Hugh, Heidi, and Elizabeth over. “Come on, man,” Max said to him before they jumped. “Get your head in the game. You can do this.”

  Fatigue already dragged on Spike’s strength, his adrenaline robbing him of his athleticism, but he managed to catch the top of the wall and drag himself over.

  Landing on the solid ground on the other side, Spike saw the rest of his team were already halfway through the cargo netting, and team Bigfoot were getting to the top of the platform at the end of the long rope. He heard Juggernaut shout, “Go,” at the team behind them.

  Even while he scrambled beneath the netting, Spike threw glances in the direction of the tunnel. Hopefully Hugh would hold them up on the climb.

  It took for Spike to get to the rope on the next obstacle to see it had knots tied in it. Hugh had already made it halfway up.

  “Go,” Juggernaut shouted, and Spike saw Hugh quicken his pace. The knots made it simple for him.

  The rest of his team on the rope, Spike turned to see team Yeti behind them as Suzi Swing, the last member of their team, dived under the cargo netting. Maybe he should be the one to slip on the rope. They’d catch him if he stalled just a little.

  “Spike!”

  Spike looked up to see Olga on the platform above. Max and Heidi were still climbing towards her.

  “Hurry it up, yeah?”

  He couldn’t throw this task. He had a team relying on him.

  Because they had Heidi in front of them, Spike caught up to Max on the rope and the two of them had to move at her pace.

  When Spike reached the top and dragged himself up onto the platform, he watched his team climbing down the netting on the other side and then looked at the tunnel again. Just before he started his descent, Ranger waved up at him and smiled. Another kick of adrenaline accelerated his pulse before he backed himself onto the netting, his entire body shaking.

  The net twisted and swayed on his way down. Spike could fall. That would be believable.

  At the back of his team still, but off the netting, Spike looked up to see the front runners of Yeti were on the platform at the top of the rope. Hugh led Minotaur into the tunnel.

  “Remember,” Ranger called at Spike as he emerged from the other side of the rat run, “just get your head down and go quickly. You’re a fast boy; I’m sure they won’t be able to grab you.”

  The noises around Spike faded, the deep thud of his pounding pulse taking over. The entrance to the tunnel looked darker than before. He tried to listen for the diseased inside. How many were there? But he couldn’t hear anything. He watched Elizabeth, Heidi, Olga, and Max follow Hugh into the tunnel as if it were nothing. They all vanished from sight, consumed by the darkness.

  When Spike tried to move forwards, he couldn’t. His heart beat at the speed of a hamster’s, and every inhale dragged in less air than the last. His hands went to the skull ring on his finger and he twisted it while staring at the hole.

  No matter how hard Spike gasped, he couldn’t catch his breath. If he went in the tunnel, he’d have a heart attack. While shaking his head, he muttered, “No.” His panic reached up and wrapped two strong hands around his throat.

  Another look at Ranger showed Spike the red face of the boy as he laughed at him. Then he looked at Matilda. She looked sad. Deeply sad and disappointed. She’d gambled on him and she’d lost.

  Spike fell to his knees and shook his head. “No, I can’t do it. I can’t do it. I can’t do it.” Unable to catch his breath, stars flashed in his vision. He looked around for someone to help. Anyone. All the cadets stared at him like he was contagious.

  Bleach ran over and dragged Spike to his feet. He put a protective arm around him and led him out of there.

  Just before they rounded the corner out of sight, Spike looked back at the others one last time. He saw Ranger and Lance, both puce with laughter. Just before he vanished, Magma’s son took one final shot at him when he said, “There wasn’t any diseased in there, you fool. It’s all in your head!”

  Spike looked up at Bleach. “Is that true?”

  Although Bleach didn’t reply, he didn’t need to. Instead, he released a hard sigh and focused on where they were heading.

  Chapter 42

  A bowl of vegetables in watery gravy in front of him, Spike lifted another spoonful of it into his mouth. He had no appetite, but if he didn’t eat, one of the team leaders would say something. He’d also grown sick of the flavour. It had tasted novel on day one, but now they were three weeks into training with no change in their diet, he didn’t know how much more of it he could eat. The once appetising smell now reminded him of feet, and the broth tasted like salt water. It didn’t help that he had a nauseating rock in his stomach. Having panicked in front of everyone had ruined him. How could he be taken seriously as a contender to be the next apprentice? When he looked up, he saw at least half the room watching him like they’d done since he’d sat down.

  When Bleach had taken Spike back to their dorms after his second panic, Spike had stated his intention to skip dinner, but Bleach wouldn’t let him. Whether he faced the others at dinner or breakfast or the next gym session, he’d have to face them. Avoiding the dining hall would only delay the inevitable and make it an even bigger deal when he finally turned up. Besides, some of them would have panic attacks at some point during training. Some of them probably already had. Like Spike, they needed to know that although it might feel like death, it wouldn’t kill you. When he’d said panicking while being chased by the diseased would, Bleach had chosen not to respond.

  Spike looked up again, the attention of many of the cadets still on him save for the one that mattered most. Ranger sat close to Matilda like he always did, and he talked at her like he always did. Not for the first time, Spike imagined himself going over there and smashing Ranger’s head against the table in front of him. He’d slam his face so many times against the wooden surface it would turn his nose to mush.

  For the past few years Spike had wanted nothing but the chance to go for national service. Now he wanted to be anywhere but. Things were so much easier before. He and Matilda would run through the city without a care. They’d stay up late, talk until the sun rose, look into each other’s eyes, and he’d dream of what their future looked like. Now she wouldn’t even look at him. How could he tell her how sorry he was? How he shouldn’t have made her gamble her freedom on him. Tears itched his eyes. He should have climbed the wall with her that night.

  Then she looked at him and he gasped. She held him in her brown-eyed gaze. If she felt something at that moment, he couldn’t read it, but at least she showed him she knew he still existed. A blink of her long eyelashes, it looked like the slightest glaze of sadness magnified her eyes, but he couldn’t be sure. He looked at her hair. The hummingbird clip had gone. He looked back at her face again, but she’d already shifted her focus.

  When Hugh shoved his bony elbow into his ribs, Spike tutted and spun around. “What?” Faced with Hugh’s soft features, some of the tension left him. “Sorry,” he said, glancing at the rest of his team and their slack shock. “That was uncalled for. What’s up?”

  Although slightly redder than before, Hugh said, “We just want you to know that you haven’t let us down. We understand what happened today, and you should know we’re here for you, standing shoulder to shoulder with you.”

  “I’ve nearly had a panic attack every morning I’ve been here,” Elizabeth said.

  “Me too,” Hugh said.

  Spike rubbed his sore eyes, his movement clumsy as his hands shook. “Thank you. And I’m sorry I’ve been so off tonight. I’m sorry we’re not getting a lie-in tomorrow. I …” Before he could say anything else, he saw Matilda in the corner of his eye as she stood up from her seat. She appeared to be heading towards the toilets. “I … uh, I need the toilet.”

  Spike got to his feet, watching Matilda leave the room as he moved through the tables after her.

  To get to the bathroom, Spike had to pass team Bigfoot. Ranger sat—like he always did—at the centre of his table, close to the space Matilda had now vacated. Lance sat so close to him, he was damn near perched on his lap. Spike noticed the glint in Ranger’s eye and saw it coming from a mile off. So when he got close to Ranger and the boy shoved his foot out at the last minute, he simply stepped over it and hissed the word prick as he passed him.

  Once through the door leading to the toilets, Spike saw Matilda heading for the girls’ cubicle. He broke into a jog to catch up with her and grabbed her shoulder, pulling her around to face him.

  After she’d glanced back down the corridor behind him, she said, “What are you doing, Spike? You know the teams aren’t supposed to mix.”

  “It’s been so hard to sit in the same room with you every day and not talk to you.”

  Matilda looked from one of his eyes to the next and her own glazed with tears.

  “Talk to me, Tilly.”

  “What do you want me to say?”

  “Tell me why you’re behaving like I don’t exist.”

  For a second, she just stared at him. For a second, she looked like she wouldn’t reply. “You want to know? Really?”

  “I can’t feel any worse than I already do.”

  “At first, I ignored you because I could see Ranger winding you up through me. I’ve ignored him too. I wanted you to stay focused on the task at hand. I knew what lay in front of us wouldn’t be easy. I knew you needed to keep your head. Also, we were told we couldn’t have relationships in here. I didn’t want to push that. And then …”

  “And then?”

  “I saw how you reacted to the diseased. I’ve witnessed your suffering and it hurts too much. Not only is this place breaking you, but it’s taking away all my hope of a better future. I had some before we came in here.”

  “I’m sorry. I’ll get better.”

  “You’ve nothing to be sorry about. I don’t blame you. I blame myself. Artan and I had freedom in front of us the night before we came here, and against my better judgement I decided to give this a try. I should have taken responsibility for Artan’s and my safety. To look at you reminds me I didn’t. That my brother’s with that man, and will be for the next six months, all for nothing.”

  “It’s not for nothing, Tilly. Please, you’ve got to tr—”

  “Don’t, Spike! I have to trust myself and my instincts. Have you seen how you react to the diseased?” Her eyes pregnant with tears, she looked disgusted to take him in. “When was the last time we had a protector that has panic attacks when they see one of those things?”

  Although Spike opened his mouth to reply, Matilda cut him off. “I’m not angry with you, I’m angry with myself. I made a bad choice. I should have known better.”

  “Why don’t you try to be the next apprentice?”

  “Haven’t you listened to anything I’ve said? I have to be here for these next six months. Every night I pray for Artan’s safety. If I tried to be an apprentice, I’d have to leave him alone with that man for even longer. And what do you think it would do to Dad to see me trying to be the next apprentice? What do you think it would do to him if I got it? I can’t put Artan in that kind of danger.”

  “We could make sure he’s—”

  “I need to make the choices that are the best for me and Artan. I need to trust myself and my own judgement. I’m not seeking counsel on it.”

  “But—”

  “Stop, Spike. Just stop.”

  As Spike looked at his love, he drew a deep and stuttered breath. “What does this mean for us?”

  No change in her expression, tears now ran from Matilda’s eyes. “We were kids before we came in here, Spike. We dared to dream. Dreams don’t come true in Edin. Ask my dad.”

  When a booming laugh bounced off the walls, Spike spun around to see Ranger in the corridor, Lance a step behind him. “Well, well, wasn’t that a beautiful performance? I never realised you were so in love, William.” He winked at Matilda and grinned. “All right, sweetheart?”

  Spike balled his fists. “What do you want?”

  While covering his chest by laying the palm of one hand against it, Ranger stepped back a pace. “My goodness, you’re a feisty one, aren’t you? I just wanted to use the toilet. I wasn’t expecting to walk in on this. But now I have, I just wanted to say how sweet you two look together. You make a nice couple. That’s okay, isn’t it?”

  When Spike looked at Matilda, she shook her head at him. But what did it matter what she wanted anymore? After national service he’d probably never see her again.

  “Anyway, enjoy the rest of your evening.” Ranger turned to walk off, pausing before he’d shown them his back. “Oh, and I wanted to warn you about public displays of affection. If the team leaders found out about you two, they’d crush this relationship like a bug beneath a boot heel.”

  A rush of blood, Spike moved forward, his shoulders squared. “It’s not a relationship, you idiot.”

  Ranger shrugged. “I’m just going by what I saw. Whatever you guys do is your own business. It’s just … it would be an awful shame for the leaders to find out about it, don’t you think?”

 

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