Or maybe she had. Maybe she’d romanticized everything—at least in her own mind—despite her intention not to. Maybe she’d fantasized about him coming to her this morning, amazed by her talent, grateful and joyous. Maybe he might come to see her as necessary in his life. Maybe something might flower between them.

  Maybe she was delusional.

  Maybe he’d always seen her as a friend and never anything more. And maybe he would never see her as anything else. She should just be happy that she’d found a way to repay him for everything he was doing for Jack. Maybe that was as far as a relationship with him would go, should go.

  The trouble was, since Brandon’s death, no other guy made her feel. Made her want a relationship again. After the shock of losing her husband, she’d wrapped herself in an emotional cocoon. She’d kept her distance—not just from men, but from everyone, really. She didn’t have the energy or the desire to be in a relationship. Wasn’t interested in romance in the slightest.

  Not until that day at the B&G when she and Luke had collided in the doorway. A switch had flipped—a wicked, naughty switch that made her feel that way again. In that moment, pressed against his chest, touching him, smelling him, feeling his heat... Just thinking about it made her body tingle, made her sweat.

  She let go an irritated snort. For pity’s sake, Jack would be up any minute. There was no time for lust. It was enough that he was helping Jack, she reminded herself. Just be happy with what you have.

  Keeping this mantra in the forefront of her mind, she made herself a pot of coffee and watched the news as she waited for Jack to wake up.

  Of course, the first thing he said to her was “Where’s Luke?” The boy idolized Luke. Crystal could only hope that wouldn’t end in disaster. Jack wouldn’t understand Luke’s need to be distant, the way she did. Jack would be crushed if Luke suddenly decided to withdraw. She needed to make sure she didn’t do anything to cause that—which meant trying to maintain her emotional distance from Luke, God help her.

  She shot her son an attempt at a smile. “He snuck out while we were sleeping. Again.”

  Jack nodded somberly. “A man needs his privacy sometimes.”

  “So... How are the lessons with him going?”

  Jack shrugged. “Good.”

  Hmm. She’d hoped for more detail, but she didn’t want to press. “And how about school? Any problems?”

  “Nope,” he said without a scrap of insecurity in evidence. Her heart lifted.

  “Well, I’m glad to hear about that. Hey, I don’t feel like making breakfast,” she said. “Do you want to go downstairs and eat there?”

  To her surprise, Jack shook his head. “Let’s go to the bakery.”

  “Okay.” Crystal’s friend Veronica, who everyone called Roni for short—opened the bakery early most days. It was a good idea to visit early, before the crowd got there and she sold out of some of the best items.

  Roni was newly engaged to Luke’s brother, Mark, and because she used to be a teacher, Luke had roped her into helping him tutor Jack. Between Roni’s understanding of Jack’s challenges and her wizardry in the kitchen, she was one of Jack’s favorite people right now. Eclipsed only by Luke himself.

  They bundled up and made the short walk to the bakery, which still served as the only bookstore in town. And thank God it was close. There was a nip in the air. By the time they’d gone the two small-town blocks, they were both shivering. And even though the lead up to Christmas was Crystal’s favorite time of year—with the decorations and lights on all the lampposts—she paid them no mind in her rush to get warm.

  “Good morning,” Roni said, with a stunningly bright smile, as they stepped through her door to the tinkling of the bell and a welcome blast of heat. Roni was a perky redhead with a generous heart. Jack ran to her and gave her a hug.

  “He wanted to come here, rather than the B&G for breakfast,” Crystal said on a laugh, unzipping her parka. “Oh, hello, Millie,” she said as Roni’s grandmother poked her head out from behind a shelf, to see who had come to visit. It was kind of joke around town that no one ever actually bought a book at Millie’s bookstore, because she couldn’t bear to let any of them go, but that wasn’t true. It was only the romance novels she refused to sell.

  Millie grinned...mostly at Jack. She made a beeline to him for the hug she demanded. “Good morning, young man. Look here,” she said, tugging him over to a rack of superhero comics by the window. “You might like these.”

  Jack let out a whoop and eagerly ran to the rack. He glanced at Crystal. “May I, Mom?” he asked.

  “Those comic books have been a huge hit,” Roni whispered. “I’m trying to stock reading material people in this town might actually want to read. I have a whole bunch of truck magazines coming next week.”

  “Smart,” Crystal said. Then, to Jack, she instructed, “Just be careful with them.” Though, she probably didn’t need to remind him to be respectful. Not now. Since Luke had come into his life, he was a completely different child. It warmed her heart.

  “So how are you?” Roni asked, handing her a coffee and her favorite cream cheese pastry without even asking.

  “Mmm. Thank you.” Crystal took a bite—it was outrageously yummy. It took a moment to respond because she wanted the delight to linger. “Pretty good. I’ve been meaning to thank you for all your help with Jack. Look at him.” He had selected a comic book and had settled at a table in the corner, his jacket thrown over the back of a chair...and he was diligently reading—slowly, and using his finger as a pointer. It gave her a thrill to see him beginning to find some enjoyment in the activity.

  Roni nodded, her eyes bright. “That’s mostly Luke, of course.”

  Crystal’s heart pinged, just a little. “He is amazing,” she said. “He is so generous with his time. And he’s done wonders with Jack.”

  Roni’s smile was warm. “Mmm. He loves helping Jack. I can tell.” She chuckled. “And you have to admit, a man giving his time to a child? Well. It’s really attractive, I gotta say.”

  “It is.” But, damn, those words were hard to say. Changing the subject seemed apropos. “So,” she gusted. “How are the wedding arrangements going?”

  A good topic, apparently, because Roni lit up and launched into a blow by blow of all the craziness she and Mark had been dealing with. Dang. When had getting married become a full time job?

  But Roni was funny and Crystal was entertained, so it was a surprise when she glanced at her watch and realized how late it was. “Hey, Jack. We have to go. I have the lunch shift today.” She ignored the grumbled aww, the way mothers did.

  “He can stay here, if you like,” Roni said.

  Crystal was surprised. No one had ever volunteered to look after Jack. His reputation for acting out preceded him all over town, usually leaving her high and dry. “Are you sure?”

  “He can help me bake,” she said loud enough for Jack to hear, then she whispered to Crystal, “We can work on fractions. Kids pay more attention when there are cookies involved.”

  “Well, all right. But I’m just down the street if you need me. And you, kiddo. Mind your manners, all right?”

  “Okay.” Jack bobbed his head like a prisoner offered a reprieve...and cookies. “I’ll be so good. I swear.”

  “Of course, you will,” Roni said with a trusting smile.

  In the past, Crystal would have been leery. It always seemed to start with a trusting smile; it always seemed to end with disaster. But now, she didn’t have that ball in the pit of her stomach. Now, she was pretty sure that when she came back to collect her progeny, nothing would be on fire and no one would be bleeding. There might even be baked goods.

  Ah, life was good! She couldn’t help but think that it was all due to Luke.

  With a spring in her step, she headed to the B&G, slipped on her apron and filled up her water jug as she did every day as she prepared for work. And, as it happened, every day, the lunch rush completely sucked every crumb of her attention. Her shift flew by.

  She was wiping down the bar when a sudden hush fell over the chattering crowd. She had to look up, because sudden hushes always meant someone interesting had appeared, or something interesting was about to happen. And sometimes, that “interesting thing” needed to be cut off at the pass.

  Indeed, Jed Cage had just pushed through the doors, like an old-timey cowboy entering a saloon. He was wearing dusty chaps and boots and looked as though he’d just gotten off his horse after a two-day ride.

  “Jed,” the chorus went up throughout the bar. With the exception of the Stirlings, the Cages were the richest folks in the county. Jed typically preferred to stay on the ranch, but every time he emerged, every time he sauntered into the B&G, the same exact thing happened. Crystal bit her lip to hold back a grin as she waited for the inevitable.

  Jed tipped his hat to the rapt audience as he glanced around. When he spotted Crystal, his handsome face broke into a predatory smile.

  He moseyed over, his grin punctuated by the toothpick between his teeth. “Well, hello there, beautiful,” he said as he leaned against the bar.

  “Hey, Jed,” she said, wiping down a sticky bar menu before she handed it to him. “What’ll you have?”

  He waggled his eyebrows, as he usually did. “Same as always.”

  She unintentionally snorted a laugh through her nose. He always asked for the same thing, a date with her. She knew nothing would ever come of it. She simply wasn’t interested. But still, he kept trying. “Well, you can’t have that. How about a beer?”

  Jed’s bottom lip came out in a pout. “Come on, Crys. Why won’t you go out with me?”

  Because you call me Crys? She tried to hold back a smile. This was a familiar routine. Heck, she’d turned him down so many times it was a joke between them. “Jed, I’ve known you since kindergarten. You are not—nor have you ever been—serious about settling down.”

  His eyes went wide. “That’s not fair.”

  “Isn’t it? How many women have you dated in the last month?”

  He batted his lashes and sent her a mooncalf look. “None.”

  “I find that hard to believe.”

  “It’s true. I decided to hold out for you.”

  At this, she laughed out loud. “Good luck with that.”

  Suddenly, he leaned in and asked softly, “Seriously. Why do you always say no?”

  She leaned toward him, too, and whispered, “You only want to date me because I say no.”

  His gorgeous face devolved into something of a pout. “That’s not true.”

  “Plus, we’re at different points in our lives.” Since he’d done her the courtesy of getting serious, she thought it only fair to do the same. She wouldn’t tell him the real reason, of course—that she was only attracted to Luke Stirling. Heck, no one needed to know that. “Jed, I have a son to think about now. I’m just not interested in a roll in the hay.”

  He sobered even more. “What if I want more, too? What if I really do want to settle down?”

  She probably shouldn’t have laughed, but honestly. “Jed, you go through women the way some people go through toilet paper.”

  She regretted the words as soon as they came out, probably because of his wounded expression. “What if I’ve changed?”

  Had he? Did people change?

  Jack had. Luke had. Or at least he was trying.

  Crystal set her hand on his and squeezed. “If that’s true, I wish you all the best, but you need to bark up some other tree. I am not the woman you’re looking for.”

  She thought, for a second, that she’d reached him, but then his big ol’ grin came out again. “Okey dokey,” he said. “Maybe next time.” And then, with a jaunty salute, he turned to Chase to gab about whatever it was men gabbed about when they just got shot down for the hundredth time by the same woman.

  It wasn’t until Crystal glanced up that she realized Luke had come into the restaurant, and he’d witnessed the entire exchange with Jed, flirting and all.

  The worst part was, judging from his expression, he didn’t seem to care. Not at all.

  * * *

  Damn. Of all the things Luke had seen in his life, that had to have been one of the most difficult. It took everything in him to remain impassive. To force a smile as he made eye contact with Crystal. But, damn, it had been hard. Even though he knew, deep in his soul, that Crystal could never be his—not in the way he wanted—it had still been a shock to see her smiling and holding hands with another man. The fact that it was Jed Cage didn’t help. Jed was everything a woman like Crystal could want. He was wealthy, funny, kind and he had a face like a Hollywood actor or something. Probably not a damn scar on his whole body. No doubt, all his parts were still in factory condition. His worst injury had probably come from falling off a horse. Or getting a splinter.

  Surely that wasn’t jealousy roiling in his soul, that ugly, burning acid. More than likely, it was simply regret. Sometimes regret hurt more.

  Or maybe it was just shock. Shock to see another man blatantly flirting with the one woman he considered untouchable.

  Of course, other men would want her. Want to flirt with her, want to date her. She was gorgeous. She was smart. She had a good sense of humor.

  It was wrong for him to feel this... What was it? Bitterness?

  Yeah. That’s what it was.

  He had no business wanting her. He had no business caring who she dated. They were friends. Full stop. She’d been pretty clear about that.

  He forced himself to continue across the suddenly vast room to the bar. “Hey,” he said in as friendly a manner as he could muster as he reached her.

  “Hey.” Her smile was bright and...friendly.

  “Sorry I didn’t thank you for last night—” he said, then broke off when he realized what that sounded like. Heat rose on his nape. He raked a hand through his hair. “I mean...”

  “I know what you mean.” She set her hand on his and he tried not to think about the fact that she’d set it on Jed’s, too, just moments ago. Also, they’d been flirting. He’d been able to detect that even from across the room. “I’m glad I was able to help.”

  He blinked. “You’re not surprised?” He rotated a shoulder. “Look at this. It’s amazing.”

  She chuckled. “I’m not surprised. I do this for money you know.”

  “Well, then you sure as hell shouldn’t be working here.” He gestured at the bar. “You should be doing that all the time. It’s downright miraculous.”

  “It won’t last forever, you know. As soon as you start overtaxing those muscles, they’ll tense up again.”

  But he wasn’t listening. “I didn’t even wake up. Not once. Do you know how long it’s been since I slept through the night?” He didn’t give her time to answer. “Years.” Three years, five months and ten days, to be exact.

  “I’m glad it helped.”

  “Thank you.” His Adam’s apple worked. “I’m so glad...”

  “Yes?”

  He stared at her as his brain raced to find the appropriate words, raced to censor what he really wanted to say. “I’m so glad we’re...friends.”

  Something flickered across her face, but it was gone so quickly—replaced so quickly, by her usual unruffled smile—that he had to ignore it. Her fingers tightened on his. “We are friends, aren’t we?” she said softly.

  He searched her expression for something—anything—that might hint to deeper feelings on her part. Of course, there was nothing—nothing but warmth and friendship. He nodded. “I hope so.”

  She nodded, too. Her smile widened. “Of course, we are.” He suddenly hated the word. Even though friendship was all he could have with her, somehow he still wanted more. “Hey,” she said with a burst of energy. “Why don’t you come to dinner tonight?”

  The quick change of topic surprised him. It took a second for him to haul himself out of that deep pit of despair and fix a smile on his face. “I’d like that...” Then his mood plummeted. Damn. “Oh, wait. Can’t. I promised Sam I’d have dinner at the ranch. It’s Danny’s birthday.”

  “Oh.” Her smile faded. “Oh, sure. Of course. Some other time then?”

  “Why don’t you come?” He had no idea why that came out of his mouth, other than the fact that he wanted to spend time with her. And if it had to be as friends, well, hell, lean into it. “Emma would love to see Jack.”

  “Well...okay.”

  It was probably unethical to use her son to emotionally blackmail her into having a meal with him, but it worked, so he decided not to sweat it. “Great. Dinner starts at six. Can I give you a ride?”

  “Oh, that would be nice.”

  “Great.” He shot her a salute and turned around to leave.

  “Wait. Luke.” She called him back, like a siren he couldn’t resist.

  “Mmm-hmm?” Was it wrong that he was thankful for one more moment with her? Or just plain ridiculous?

  “Is there anything I can bring?” she asked.

  This time his smile was a real one. “Nope.” There was always enough food for an army. “Just yourself and Jack. I’ll pick you guys up at five thirty. See you then.”

  “See you then,” she echoed.

  And, when he got to the door of the B&G, and glanced back, her eyes were still on him, and she was smiling. Which meant nothing, really. He wasn’t sure why that fact lifted his mood so much, but it did.

  Also, he was seeing her again tonight. That lifted his mood as well.

  * * *

  Danny’s birthday party was raucous, but then, Crystal had expected nothing less. Especially when she walked in the door and saw the crowd. In addition to the entire Stirling family, several others were there, including Chase, his wife, Bella, and their children. Lizzie’s sister, Nan, had driven over from Seattle for the weekend, and Roni was there with her grandmother, her cousins and their children as well.

 

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