That was heartbreak enough for one day.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  “Okay, this is it.”

  Theo’s heart was in his mouth as Miranda pulled into the driveway of the Majestic Hotel, her tiny Chevrolet Spark crunching over the gravel. While his dad might still have let him use the Lux car service, Theo hadn’t wanted his help. It felt important to do this on his own from the start.

  “Wow,” Miranda said as they approached the building. “It’s even cooler than I remembered.”

  The Majestic had her finery on display tonight, lights blazing against the evening sky, but she couldn’t hold Theo’s attention. His eyes were fixed on the battered VW campervan parked out front.

  He wasn’t too late.

  Sucking in a breath, he tried to will himself calm. There was no going back now, anyway; he’d already burned his bridges in New York. All that was left was to go forward. He only hoped words didn’t fail him when he was face-to-face with Luca. And that—even the thought of seeing him again—made him smile. A twitchy, nervous smile, for sure, but still a smile.

  “Okay,” Miranda said as she parked up next to Luca’s van. “What’s next, boss?”

  “I’m not your boss anymore,” he said absently, his attention captured by the open doors to the Majestic. From inside, he could hear the faint sound of music. Odd, given that Lux would take possession of the hotel in the morning.

  “It’s a turn of phrase,” Miranda said. “Besides...maybe I’m hoping you’ll hire me?”

  That made him look at her. “You are?”

  “We’ll see.”

  They would indeed. Absolutely nothing about this insane plan was guaranteed, and there was a fair chance it would be the worst mistake of Theo’s life. But there was also a chance it would be the best thing he’d ever done and there was only one way to find out. Steeling himself, he grabbed his bag and climbed out of the car. He sucked in a deep breath of New Milton air, relishing the sea-tang and the fresh breeze tugging at his neatly styled hair as if urging him to let go, to unfurl like a sail. Despite his nerves, he smiled. Yes. Yes, this felt right.

  The sun had only just set, the sky striated in burnt orange and black, and the hotel rose glorious before it. Mine, he thought, with a sharp, nervous pulse. Maybe, ours.

  With Miranda a couple steps behind, he headed across the drive and up the steps onto the porch. Closer now, he could hear the music more clearly and his steps faltered. There were other sounds, too: people talking, laughing. A party?

  Shit. They were having a party. He stuttered to a halt a few steps inside the doorway. He’d assumed Luca would be alone, or at the least only with Jude and Don.

  Miranda’s hand landed on his back. “Don’t stop now, boss.”

  “There are people here,” he hissed.

  She laughed. “Yeah. So?”

  “I can’t—”

  “You gotta.”

  She was right. He had to do this if he was going to make things right. In for a penny, in for a pound, as his dad liked to say.

  Shoulders braced, Theo followed the sound of the music across the foyer to the door of the Majestic’s elegant dining room. The tables had been pushed back against the walls, and small lights twinkled around the French doors which stood open to the porch and the garden beyond. Theo’s stomach jumped because it looked so much like his own vision for the place, and that felt like an omen, like the universe willing him forward. Even so, he hesitated on the threshold. The room was crammed with people, some at the makeshift buffet laid out on the tables, others standing in groups talking and laughing. Music came from the old CD player in one corner, although nobody was dancing. He spotted Dee straight away, her bright purple hair standing out, and then he saw Jude and Don. He smiled to see Jude looking so well, sitting like a queen holding court at the far side of the room, Don playing consort at her shoulder. Above them someone had strung a homemade banner, reading: Goodbye and Good Luck!

  His stomach flip-flopped nervously. If all went well... But, no, he wouldn’t get ahead of himself. Pausing in the doorway, he took a couple of steadying breaths, watched the gauzy curtains billow in the breeze and let the scent of sea air settle him. He was here. He was going to do it. He was going to—

  Luca stepped in from the porch. He wore jeans and a shirt, his dark blond hair swept back, walking with his customary laconic swagger. Theo’s stomach tensed, remembering their fight outside the hospital, and all his inner demons screamed in alarm: This won’t work. Luca doesn’t want you, he never wanted you. He said so.

  Miranda touched his arm. “There he is. Go get him, tiger.”

  She gave him a little push and he half-stumbled into the room, walking forward with his pulse pounding in his ears so loud that at first he didn’t notice the conversation subsiding around him, didn’t notice the eyes turning toward him. It was only when the woman Luca was talking to said something, and Luca turned with a start, stopping dead, that the rest of the room came roaring back. Luca’s eyes were wide—Astonishment? Shock?—and his lips parted, but he didn’t say anything, he just stared.

  Theo found himself stranded in the middle of the room, the oppressive weight of everyone’s gaze intolerable. The only sound was the tinny music, and somehow it only accentuated the silence. He swallowed, endeavoring to work a little moisture into his mouth, and said, “Hello, Luca.”

  Luca nodded, frowning. “You guys don’t take possession until tomorrow.”

  True enough. “But that’s not why I’m here.”

  Dimly, he was aware of Jude getting to her feet, a blur in the periphery of his vision. His focus was wholly on Luca, watching the way his frown deepened, watching the way his throat worked as he swallowed hard, listening to the catch in his voice when he said, “So why are you here?”

  Good fucking question. “Because I...” Say it. Say it. “Because I have a proposal.”

  One of Luca’s eyebrows twitched. “About?”

  You, me, our lives. Everything. “The Majestic,” he said, which encompassed them all. “Could we go somewhere to discuss it?”

  A murmur skittered around the room and someone turned off the music, plunging them into deeper silence. Theo preferred it, because now all he could hear was his own thumping heartbeat and the distant wash of the surf.

  Luca glanced around, looking at Jude, then turned back to Theo. “Here’s fine.”

  He’d worked out a speech, of course. Not one he’d intended to deliver to half the bloody town, but it didn’t matter because all the words had fled his mind anyway. He opened his mouth, closed it, flinched away from memories of that night with Grant Daly in another room full of people, another stupid declaration. He wiped his clammy palms against his chinos, anxiety spiraling up into his throat. Everyone was looking at him. Luca cocked his head, one hand twitching as if checking the impulse to reach out.

  Theo stumbled forward in response, his body trying to overrule his hesitant mind. “I’ve bought the Majestic,” he blurted.

  Luca exchanged another look with Jude. “We know...”

  “No, I mean—” He frowned, chewing his words. “I’ve bought it, from my father. I cashed in my trust fund, some investments, and my shares in Lux.” Fuck, shut up, they don’t care about that. “I want to save it.”

  A wave of excitement rolled around the room. Jude put a hand to her mouth, Don gripping her shoulder. But Luca didn’t move at all, his eyes fixed on Theo. “I don’t understand. Why?”

  And that was the crux. That was why he was here. Blowing out a nervous breath, throat tight, he made himself meet Luca’s eyes. He loved those eyes, so bright and open. “Because... Because she’s too beautiful to tear down.” True, but again not the whole truth. “Because I can see it. I can see how it’ll work, what it’ll look like, how we’ll market it. Because I want to build something up from scratch, fight for it, make it grow. And I want—” He swallowed, bracing himself to say it out loud, to claim his desire as his own. “I want to do it with you, Luca. Because I think we could be great together. And I think you want it, too.”

  The words hung there, suspended between them in a breathless hush. His heart hammered, each beat a sharp, lurching pain. Each second of silence harder to bear than the last, deeper than the last. Luca’s gaze rested on the floor, his mouth a hard, straight line, hands fisted at his sides. Theo could see his chest rising and falling, shoulders bunched. But he said nothing, he didn’t answer.

  A flush of humiliation crawled across Theo’s skin. His ears burned, pulse drumming louder, blood rushing. He dropped his gaze to his shoes, eyes hot, blinking hard. He tried to swallow, but couldn’t, wanted to say something, but couldn’t choke out any words.

  Luca didn’t want him. Of course he didn’t. Why the fuck had he ever thought he would? And then another thought struck: would this look like harassment? Fuck me and I’ll save your hotel? Horror forced his head back up. “Obviously, if you’re not interested, I’ll go ahead without you.” The words scratched in his throat, sounding wrong to his ears. “I’ll leave you to think it over...”

  And that was all he could manage. His legs were shaking, his breathing all over the place, and he could barely see through his blurry eyes as he turned and fled the room. Miranda was on his heels but he couldn’t look at her. All he wanted was to get out, to go, to run. Because Luca didn’t want him and he should have fucking known.

  Nobody would ever want him.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Luca’s body wasn’t his own, it stayed rooted to the floor while his mind spun in freefall.

  From the moment he’d seen Theo standing there, watching him with those serious, apprehensive eyes, the world had stopped turning. He’d hardly been able to breathe. At first he’d thought Theo had come, in person, to take possession of the hotel and that had fired up his anger. But then...

  He couldn’t get his head around it: Theo had bought the hotel, personally, because he wanted to save it. And he wanted to save it with Luca. He was offering Luca everything he’d been too afraid to take, and it scared the living crap out of him. It paralyzed him with terror because if Theo could offer him everything, then Theo could take it all away. He could trample Luca into the dirt, leave him bloody and broken. If losing him had hurt like a bitch after nine days together, what the hell would it feel like after nine weeks, or nine months, or nine years?

  “Wow.” Ashna threw him a flinty side-eye. “I guess you really aren’t that into him, huh?”

  But Luca was only half-listening. In his mind’s eye, he could still see Theo standing in the middle of the room, wide-eyed and terrified. His shaky declaration might have been the single bravest act Luca had ever witnessed, because despite all his uncertainties, and with no guarantee of success, Theo had laid everything on the line. And somehow, impossibly, he’d done it for Luca.

  He’d come back, for Luca.

  His heart began to beat. Surely it had been silent for minutes, hours. Weeks, even. Perhaps it hadn’t beaten since the day Theo left. But it was beating now, slamming against his ribs, and his body was flooding with energy, with fear and hope and terror and a banked tension he couldn’t release until he’d spoken to Theo.

  “I have to find him,” he blurted, pushing past Ashna. “I have to find him!”

  He strode out of the room, then he ran, sprinting across the foyer. He had to speak to Theo. Fuck, where was he? The foyer was empty and he burst out onto the porch, terrified of seeing taillights disappearing down the drive. But nothing moved. All was silence. “Theo!” he shouted into the night. “Theo!”

  Darting down the steps, he spun around. It was full dark now and the light from the hotel only spilled so far. Beyond it, everything was pitch-black. “Theo?” Where the hell would he have gone? Around the hotel and onto the cliffs, maybe. His stomach lurched. Fuck. It was dark and Theo sometimes tripped over shit. What if he fell?

  He sprinted around the back of the hotel and ducked into the garden. They’d rigged twinkle lights on the porch and they cast a little more light, but there was still no sign of Theo. Or—wait. Was someone standing in the shadows by the gate?

  “Theo?” He ran forward, slowing to a walk so as not to spook him, but when the figure turned around it wasn’t Theo. It was the woman who drove his car, the one who’d driven him away from the hospital. She stood, arms folded, and glared at Luca. She’d glared at him last time, too, and he felt compelled to raise his hands. “Where is he?”

  In the dark, he could see her eyes gleam. “Oh, so now you want to talk to him?”

  “He took me by surprise. I didn’t—” But he couldn’t explain himself to this woman, not until he’d found Theo. “Please, tell me where he went. I have to find him.”

  She looked away, arms still folded. “Don’t fuck this up,” she warned, and jerked her head toward the gate. “He said he was going down to the beach.”

  The thought of Theo scrambling down the steep steps in the dark, when he was upset, made Luca’s stomach pitch. Darting past the woman, he yanked the gate open and ran. Only his own fear of falling kept him from throwing himself down the steps. But there was no sign of Theo—no crumpled body at the bottom, thank God—and he dashed out onto the sand. The tide was in, so the beach wasn’t very deep. It was, however, very dark. He filled his lungs to yell, but stopped when he saw movement on the foreshore. Someone walking. Theo, it had to be. Luca would recognize him anywhere.

  He let out his breath in a slow exhale and waited for the surge of anxiety to return, the paralyzing fear he’d felt only minutes ago in the Majestic. But it didn’t come back. All he felt was a heady, churning hope. Heart pounding, he started walking across the beach, fingertips tingling in anticipation.

  Theo had taken a risk. Luca could do the same.

  He slowed as he got closer to the water. Theo stood far enough back not to get his feet wet, staring out at the horizon. As Luca watched, Theo scrubbed a hand over his eyes and Luca’s heart pinched so tight he had to suck in a breath. “Theo...”

  Startled, Theo turned around with a jolt. In the darkness Luca could see the pale oval of his face, his eyes dark pools, glinting in the scant starlight. He looked skittish and Luca found himself holding out a hand like you would to settle something wild. “I’m sorry,” Luca said.

  Theo nodded. “It’s okay.” His voice was raw and tearful. “I shouldn’t have put you in that position—”

  “No.” Luca came closer. “No, you don’t understand.”

  Theo held up a hand, warning him off. “Don’t. Spare me the reasons, Luca. It doesn’t matter. I fucked up, I know I did, and—”

  “No, you were right.” The words spilled out without planning or anticipation, leaving him dizzy. “I want everything you said, Theo. I want to stay in New Milton. I want to run the Majestic, I want to build her up into something new and better. I want what we talked about: weddings, and happy people, and—” His voice gave out, balking at the last hurdle. But he cleared his throat, made himself carry on. Theo had done it in front of an audience, Luca could do it in front of the only audience that mattered. “And I want it all with you. I want—” He swallowed, took a breath. “Theo, I think I’m in love with you.”

  Theo stared, eyes impossibly wide. “What?”

  Luca reached for him, found his fingertips. Theo didn’t resist, his simple touch grounding Luca. “I should have told you weeks ago, but I’m a fucking idiot. And a coward. I’m sorry.”

  “I’m sorry, too.” Theo’s warm hand gripped Luca’s. “I shouldn’t have closed the sale without—”

  Luca put a finger over Theo’s lips to stop him. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you.” He traced Theo’s mouth, the smooth-shaven skin of his jaw, stepping closer still. “And what I said about wishing we hadn’t...? Theo, you have to know I didn’t mean it. Not even a little bit.”

  “You were angry.”

  “I was an asshole.” He cupped Theo’s face, looked into those wide, trusting eyes and felt his heart swell until he was certain it couldn’t be contained. “You’re so fucking real, Theo. So full of heart and emotion, so responsive, so amazing. And brave. I know I don’t deserve you, but, God, can we try?”

  His beautiful, wry eyebrow lifted. “Why else do you think I’m here?”

  Luca smiled, vibrating with emotions he could hardly comprehend: want, love, joy, hope. Gratitude. A million things he’d vowed he didn’t need and now couldn’t live without. And all of them for Theo. He bumped their noses together, felt Theo’s soft breath against his lips, felt his hands rest on Luca’s hips. God, but it felt good to be touched again. Slipping his arms around Theo’s waist, Luca splayed one hand on his back, holding him steady, close. Safe.

  “Luca.” Theo breathed his name into the tender space between them. “Luca.” And then they were kissing, a deep slow slide of mouths and lips, Luca’s hand knotting in Theo’s hair, bodies tangling, breath mingling. Theo tasted of salt-tears, his mouth hot and open, hands twisting into Luca’s shirt as they pressed together from chests to toes, every inch of them touching.

  Gasping for air, Luca kissed Theo’s jaw, his ear—felt Theo’s knees give, his soft moan so beautiful Luca’s eyes burned. “I love you,” Luca said again, the words easier now, less terrifying. “I love you, Theodore Wishart.”

  “I love you, too.” Theo laughed, a watery joyful sound. “Oh God, I can’t believe this is real. I can’t believe it’s really happening.”

  And all the doubts contained in those words made Luca choke, made him wrap Theo in his arms and hold him hard. Theo did the same, both of them wrecked and tearful and flying so high Luca could feel the heat of the long-set sun on his back.

  “Whoohoo!”

  The yell came from the clifftop, and they turned, not pulling apart, to see shapes dancing on the edge, backlit by the faint glow from the Majestic. Theo laughed, burrowing in closer to Luca. “Oh God, I think that’s Miranda.”

 

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