By the time Saint and Crue clamber into the kitchen, Dawson and I have already finished the first batch. “Well, look who got lucky last night,” Saint teases as he slides on to the stool beside Corv. Crue slips up behind Saint and rests his arms over his shoulders, while I pin them both with a warning look.

  “If you didn’t want us saying anything, then maybe you should have worn a shirt, duh.” I frown at Crue after helping Dawson pour another batch of batter on the skillet.

  “What?” The three assholes begin to laugh. Darius comes up beside me and claps me on the shoulder drawing my attention to him.

  “I’m guessing Valance is a scratcher,” he says as he wiggles his brows. That’s when it hits me, she clawed the shit out of my back last night. The laughter that bubbles out of me is that infectious even Darius joins in.

  “Shut your pie holes,” I say as I go back to helping my boy finish making the pancakes.

  “Has anyone seen my phone charger?” Crue asks.

  “Yeah, you left it in my car the other day,” Corvin answers. Crue ambles out of the room to go grab his charger as the rest of us discuss the upcoming season. “I’m so ready, man, DCU isn’t shit now without their bitch of a captain.” At the mention of Gary, Darius grows tense.

  “I’m worried about what he’s up to, I haven’t heard shit from Troy,” D grits out.

  “I know he has visited your dad a few times, but as for school and what the hell he is doing for cash, I have no idea,” I answer.

  “I haven’t heard shit from my dad either,” Saint says solemnly. Corv reaches over and clasps our boy on the shoulder offering his support. Devon is still a thorn in our side we need to take down. With everything that has been happening with Valance, I haven’t really thought about any of the business side of things.

  “We’ll deal with him—” Darius is cut off the moment Crue walks back in carrying another fucking flower and a white folded piece of paper.

  “We have a problem.” The somber tone of his voice has me stiffening. Darius pushes me out of the way so he can take over helping Dawson finish the last of the pancakes. I hold my hand out for him to pass me the paper. Crue shakes his head earning a glare from me. “I don’t think you want to see this.”

  “Give it to me now, Crue,” I demand. Crue cuts a look at Saint who nods for him to do as I asked. He takes a step forward and places the paper in my hand, I unfold it and read the fucking letter.

  You thought you could leave and I wouldn’t know?

  Have you learned nothing in our time together? You can try to run, try to hide but watching you at the beach the other day I could see the look in your eyes, you miss me. Say the word my love and I will get rid of that handsy self-righteous bastard who claims to be our boy’s father.

  I’ll see you real soon, V.

  All my love and more.

  I crumple the letter in my hand just as Valance and Leah walk into the kitchen. Val’s hair is wild and untamed, her eyes are bright and filled with happiness. She smiles at the others but that smile drops off her face the moment she sees the flower in Crue’s hand.

  “Where did you get that?” she whispers, I hate the hint of fear I hear in her tone. Crue looks to me and Val follows his gaze, that’s when I notice she is wearing my shirt and fuck me if I don’t love the sight of that shit. “What’s that?” she asks, pointing to the crumbled paper in my hand.

  “Nothing,” I grit out. She pinches her lips to the side as she closes the space between us and pries the paper from my fist, she unfolds it and reads the letter aloud. Once she is finished, she crumples it again and tosses it in the trash, then turns to me with a look of hopelessness in her blue eyes.

  “I’m sorry.” My brows pull in, confused at why she is sorry. Leah wraps an arm around Val’s shoulders and pulls her into her side.

  “You have nothing to be sorry for, none of this is your fault, Val.”

  Val nods, acknowledging Leah’s words but says nothing for a moment as she gets lost in her own thoughts. Darius helps Dawson plate the last of the pancakes before sitting him on the counter in the middle of Corv and Saint so he can eat the fruits of his labor. I fucking love my brothers for how well they have adapted and accepted my son as their own. “Where did you find the flower and note?” Val asks as she looks to Crue.

  “Uh, on the windscreen of Beck’s car.” That surprises the shit out of me. Val nods and slowly lifts her gaze to mine.

  “He knows who you are, Beckett, he’s been watching me since I arrived at CHU. I’m so sorry I brought this on you guys. If… if you want me to go, I get it.”

  Fuck that!

  I close the space between us, pull her out of Leah’s hold and crush her against me. She wraps her arms around me and buries her face in my chest. Leah shoots me a knowing smirk before rounding the counter and going to Darius. I know Valance and I still have a shit load of stuff to work out, we may have fucked but we’re both still harboring anger toward each other, which will take a shit load of time to work through.

  “You’re not going anywhere, nor is Dawson. We’ll figure this shit out,” I say. She pulls back and stares up at me.

  “Beck, me being here is going to put everyone in danger.” Her argument is as weak as piss.

  “We’ve all lived together before, we’ll make shit work,” Saint says. Val turns to him in surprise.

  “I have a kid!” I narrow my eyes at her.

  “Correction, we have a kid,” I snap.

  “And we don’t give a fuck, he’s our family,” Darius says in a tone that leaves no room for argument.

  “Fuck!” Valance's eyes bulge out of her head at Dawson’s outburst. Darius flinches and backs away holding his hands up.

  “My bad,” D mutters as he slips Leah in front of him as a shield, earning an eye roll from the blonde. Val shifts away from me to approach our son who is covered in maple syrup and grinning at her.

  “Baby, that word isn’t okay for children to say, only adults can use that word.”

  My boy frowns and looks at me. “Becky say fuck.” I splutter, the little turd just singled me out!

  Val groans and looks to the ceiling before refocusing on our kid. “Well, he’s an adult so he can say what he likes.” Dawson shrugs and nods then goes back to eating while Val turns back to me with a look of unease in her eyes. “Can we talk?”

  Three words no guy ever wants to hear.

  Valance

  I follow Beck out the back and mimic his move when he drops down into one of the loungers next to the pool. It’s new for me to be able to ask someone to watch Dawson so I can have a minute alone. Leah practically leaped at the chance to hang out with Dawson when I asked if she could watch him while I spoke to Beck. I’m starting to learn that he is safe with these people. If Beckett trusts them, then I guess that means I can too, it’s just hard when I have had no one to rely on but myself since the moment he was born.

  “Just say whatever it is that’s on your mind.” I take a deep breath and steel my spine as I meet Beck’s pale-green eyes. He has his emotions walled off from me and I hate that I can’t read him when he does that.

  “I don’t want you to give up going to Alaska because of me.” From the way his brows furrow, I can tell he wasn’t expecting me to say that.

  “What?”

  “You can’t change your life and plans because I have some crazy asshole stalking me… I’ll figure something out—”

  “You’re out of your fucking mind!” I recoil at his harsh tone. “If you think I’ll leave my fucking kid now that I know he exists, then you are stupider than you look!” I bristle at his underhanded insult.

  “Screw you, I was only trying to help—”

  “How the fuck were you trying to help by getting me out of Dawson’s life?” he yells.

  “No, Beckett, I was actually just trying to help!” Knowing this is just going to escalate, I stand prepared to make my way inside until he jumps up and blocks my path.

  “Don’t fucking walk away.”

  I throw my hands in the air. “Why the hell not? I won’t sit here and have you yell at me because you think you have a right,” I shout.

  “I do have a fucking right.”

  “No, you don’t!”

  “You hid my kid, I have every fucking right!” he roars.

  “You killed my father!” I scream back. Beck’s eyes widen for a second before he schools his features, his eyes fill with hatred as he peers down at me.

  “How long you gonna hold that shit over my head, Valance?” His tone is calm and neutral which worries me more than if he yelled.

  “When you admit that you had no fucking right to interfere and decide that it was your call to take away a parent from me.”

  “I don’t even fucking know what that means.”

  “For someone who owns a multi-billion dollar company you aren’t very bright!” I tartly reply.

  “Yeah well, what do you expect from someone who didn’t have a fucking roof over their head until they made it to college because they were too embarrassed to tell their friends they slept in abandoned houses or under a bridge because their girlfriend kicked their ass to the curb.” Guilt washes over me. “Don’t look at me with pity, Valance, I don’t fucking need it. I made something of myself and I’ll never be that poor little punk kid who had nothing. My son will never know the struggles that I faced.”

  “Yeah, and he’ll never know what it’s like to have his father murdered in front of his eyes.” I grit out through clenched teeth.

  “You forget my parents are dead as well, I know what it feels like.”

  “No, you don’t.”

  “Then explain it to me!” he roars.

  “My dad was a piece of shit, I know that, but what you don’t get, Beckett, is I don’t care that he’s gone. Your actions that night had a domino effect. I lost my home as well, and unlike you, I didn’t have a chance to run. I had a kid to raise on my own.” Tears trail down my cheeks now. “I’m mad at you because you doing what you did meant I lost my home.” He scoffs and shakes his head.

  “How materialistic of you,” he snarks.

  “Fuck you! Home wasn’t a place for me, you dumbass. My home was you! I fucking lost you that night, that’s what I’m angry about because you have never once admitted you fucked up and left me behind! You. Fucking. Left. Me.” Angry tears cascade down my cheeks. Beckett stands there with his mouth ajar and a shocked look on his face. I shake my head and blow out an exasperated breath.

  “Valance…” he whispers my name like it’s a prayer, but I can’t deal with this shit, I’m too emotional.

  “Don’t, Beck. Clearly too much shit has happened for us to move on. I’ll work out somewhere to stay—”

  “You’re not leaving!”

  “Why not? You have made it crystal clear that you don’t want me here, so why the hell would I stay? Us fighting and all the tension between us isn’t good for Dawson.”

  “Because I am telling you to stay, you don’t have anywhere to go.” I glower up at him.

  “My apartment may not be much to you but it’s our home—”

  “You’re not listening, Valance, you don’t have an apartment.” I gasp and stumble back a step.

  “What’d you do, Beckett.” He shrugs his shoulders.

  “Had removalist go in and pack your shit, handed your keys back to the realtor. Oh, I also paid off all Dawson’s childcare fees. He won’t be going to that place, we’ll all pitch in and work out a roster to watch him while you're at school. I’ll order him a bed and have it delivered later this afternoon. All your school shit is paid in full and I also contacted your boss at that shitty diner, you won’t be working there anymore. Now, if you’re done having a fucking tantrum, I’m freezing and going inside.” I stand here stunned fucking speechless as I watch him turn and walk back inside. I cringe when I see the claw marks along his naked back.

  One week later

  Living with Beckett is intense, for the past week it’s been nothing but arguing all day and then each night we put our son to sleep in his own bed, that Beckett had delivered, and put in his room, then we fuck the night away and get lost in each other. Every morning, we wake to find a fucking Black Mamba Petunia on the porch. Beck and the guys had cameras installed but now, whoever this stalker is has a range of different companies delivering them. Beck has forbidden Dawson and I to leave the house without someone with us since I went to the store the other day alone, and the next morning a package arrived with photos of me and Dawson with a man photoshopped into the pictures with us. It’s obvious they used a different picture of a random guy to crop into each of the photos. That scared me, but yesterday when another batch of photos came, those ones had me paralyzed with fear. They were pictures of Beck with holes cut into his face and a letter promising to kill him if I didn’t leave and return to my apartment.

  “Momma, go school?” I shake my head to chase away those dark thoughts and smile down at my little boy, who sits on the mat with Katie coloring.

  “Yeah baby, Momma is going with Aunt Leah, Uncle Nathan and Uncle Saint.” The day Beck and I had our big fight out back, he told Dawson that everyone in this house is family so he should address them by aunt and uncle, my little guy was thrilled. Corvin, Crue, Darius and Beck amble into the room from working out in the basement. Beck’s gaze immediately lands on me and it sends a shiver down my spine. Before I lose the nerve I march over to him and hold out the old leather book I made. He stares at me for a second before looking back at me.

  “What’s this?” he asks skeptically.

  “Back at your cabin, you told me you wanted to know everything, every single detail about our son.” I shuffle nervously from foot to foot worried he will hate it.

  “Yeah?” I take a deep breath and push on.

  “I never knew if I would ever see you again, but in case I did, I wanted you to be able to see all of his firsts, his milestones, and see pictures of him growing over the years. This book is filled with everything. The other day I didn’t just go to the store, I went to the storage locker where you had my things taken to get this for you.” HIs eyes widen as he looks between me and the book. He tentatively reaches out and grabs it.

  “I-I don’t know what to say.” I smile and lean up on my tip toes placing a quick kiss to his lips before backing away, smiling like a dork.

  “Don’t say anything, just enjoy learning about your son. There’s also a USB in there, I filmed his birth so don’t watch that with the guys!” I warn him. Everyone laughs at that. Beck’s gaze meets mine and for the first time, when he looks at me, there is no hint of anger only… awe and that steals my fucking breath.

  “Eww, can we go before he bones you in front of us.” I throw my head back and laugh at Saint. I place a quick kiss on Dawson’s head as Cody and Katie stand to grab their bags. The three girls and I have class first up, so Saint is coming with us so we aren’t on our own.

  “Bye Momma, be good. I stay home with uncles and Daddy.” Everyone freezes, and no one utters a single word for a solid minute.

  “He said Daddy!” Beck whispers. Dawson frowns as he looks around the room to find us all staring at him. Beck’s laughter is what breaks the tension, I stare at him in surprise as he places the book on the small table next to the sofa then reaches down to lift our son up and places him on his naked shoulders. Oh God, the sight of Beckett in nothing but a pair of black shorts and our son on his shoulders has me getting hot and breathless.

  “Oh snap, Becky is a DILF!”

  “Goldie!” Darius snaps at Leah, who just giggles. I nod my agreement because she is right, Beckett Dawson is a dad I’d like to fuck. “I’m standing right fucking here!”

  “Language!” Saint and Crue shout in unison, making us all laugh again. Everyone has been trying to not cuss around Dawson. My laughter dies off the moment I look back to Beck. My breath hitches when I see the raw hunger in his gaze as he looks down at me. Even when we have had sex recently he has never looked at me like this. Before I can read too much into it, Leah grips my arm and pulls me after her.

  “Hurry up before Darius murders me!” she says on a laugh as we rush out the front door. The girls break out into fits of laughter but I don’t join in, my mind is still stuck on the look in Beck’s eyes. The memory of it sends a shiver down my spine.

  “You have a death wish,” Cody jests. Leah rolls her eyes and shrugs.

  “Darius knows I love him but Becky is just… my Becky.” Jealousy runs through me at Leah calling Beck hers. I want to stomp my foot and tell her that he’s mine but I can’t. Truthfully, I have no idea what the hell we are, it’s not like either of us have said anything on the matter.

  “Well, at least you know where you stand,” Cody says solemnly.

  Leah cringes. “Corvin still holding you at arm’s length?” she asks. Cody nods her head as she drops her gaze to the ground. Saint reaches out and grabs Katie’s bag, yanking her back into his side so I quicken my pace to stand on Cody’s other side to give them some semblance of privacy.

  “He won’t even talk to me!” Cody breathes out.

  “Why?” I ask.

  “I told him I loved him Christmas Eve and he walked out of the room and refuses to acknowledge that I said it. Every time I bring it up or try to talk to him he just walks away or we fight. Before when we would fight, we would have the best makeup sex but now, it’s like he can’t even touch me.” I cringe feeling horrible for my friend.

  “Corv is a dick if he can’t see how amazing you are.” Cody smiles at Leah, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. God, I hope that I don’t end up like Cody, pining after Beck and watching him fall for another girl, that would crush me.

  Beckett

  Crue, Corvin, Darius and I sit around in the living room with our laptops on our laps trying to work while Dawson plays with his toys on the mat. I keep looking at my screen then to the book Val gave me this morning. I’m dying to open it but I’m terrified if I open it all my anger will come rushing to the surface. We fight every day and fuck the night away, honestly sometimes I think we pick fights just so we can guarantee that we’ll fuck each night. Having her and Dawson around has been fucking amazing. Waking up next to her each morning feels so fucking right.

 

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