Whelan 03 nice try, p.16
Elling & Jackie, page 16
Not when she was still in love with Elling, despite her head telling her to forget about him.
Inside the clubhouse, her nieces and nephews spotted her before she could make herself useful in the kitchen. Chee and Nikki reached her first, almost tackling her in their exuberance.
"Geez, guys, stop growing, okay?" She hugged them both. "What's it like to be eighteen years old?"
They giggled, falling into each other. Nikki held on to Jackie's hand and said, "We're ten."
"Sure, you are." She laughed, truly happy to hear Nikki. There was a time when she'd been mute, but she'd conquered her fears and had bloomed under Thorn's roof when he married Nikki's mom, Jessy. "So, is school out for the summer?"
Chee looped his arm around Nikki's shoulders. "We're going to make a tree fort over at Uncle Olin's house for Trik. Uncle has lumber and nails and ladders and rope and a whole bunch of neat stuff."
"That's cool." She held her hand out for Cora, wandering by and seeing her.
One by one, she connected with all the kids, making sure they knew she was still a part of their life. Gunnar even promised to call her sometime during his break on his new cell phone, and Lynea gave her two kisses telling her good luck. She wasn't sure what the sentiment was for, but the love filled a small part of her bruised heart.
Escaping to get a drink, she walked in the direction of the kitchen and found Stassi standing alone in the hallway. Her sister put her finger to her lips and motioned her over.
When she reached Stassi, her sister pulled her out the back door. The warmth of the day hit her after being in the air-conditioned clubhouse.
"What are you doing?" She jerked her arm out of her grasp.
"The men are talking about the Fed's sting." Stassi continued to whisper, though there was nobody around outside. "None of them were worried, because Jett received wind of what would happen weeks before the run. When law enforcement showed up, all they found was an empty semi-trailer and a whole bunch of bikers enjoying a ride."
"What?"
Stassi tilted her head. "They'd sent a decoy to make the delivery, while our brothers rode into the sting, knowing they were going to be arrested. Don't you get it?"
"No." She tried to grasp what she was learning.
Brikken was always involved in something illegal. She'd known that from an early age. That's why the women were never included in the meetings, and the men never indulged their wives or girlfriends when they were questioned. How many times had she heard the term "club business" and been expected to shut her mouth and ask no more questions?
Still confused, Jackie lifted her shoulders and shook her head. "So, they knew they were getting caught and made sure the cops wouldn't find anything and be able to charge them with a crime? I don't see what that has—"
"I'm telling you the arrest wasn't because Elling had sent the Federal Agent after Brikken." Stassi's gaze hardened. "As much as I hate to admit it, because I really don't like the guy. The sting wasn't brought on by Elling or Slag Motorcycle Club. Brikken knew about the sting weeks in advance—that's what I heard."
"Who said it?"
"Jett."
She inhaled swiftly. So, it wasn't a rumor Stassi had overheard. If the explanation came out of the president of Brikken's mouth, it was true.
"What are you going to do, sis?"
"I'm..." She blew out her breath, her mind racing in circles. "I don't know."
Elling had come over to talk to her, knowing what happened to Brikken. When he claimed innocence, he hadn't been lying to her. He hadn't used her to get to Brikken or sent Agent Campbell after her family.
"Oh, my God." She closed her mouth, gawking at her sister. "Do you know what this means?"
Could she see Elling again?
Could she apologize?
Did she have anything to be sorry for? She was protecting her family.
Stassi's upper lip curled. "I don't like him, so it doesn't matter what it means to me."
She looked off into the distance at the fence surrounding the Brikken property. The pain in Elling's eyes when he'd come by to talk with her at the hotel and found Stassi with her had stayed with her. For some reason, she couldn't believe that his pain came from her anger. Something else bothered him.
Maybe he was frustrated over having to keep their relationship secret. She understood that emotion. For how much it excited her in the beginning, it only caused her more stress.
"I need to see him," she whispered.
"Can't you just let him go and take comfort that you didn't have your hand in why our brothers were picked up by the cops?"
She shook her head. "Not until I talk to him and listen to what he has to say."
"Sis, I can't go back to Portland with you. I have to go back to work." Stassi grabbed her arms. "I don't think you should see him alone or at all."
"I have to." She hugged Stassi. "Please, don't say anything to anyone."
"This isn't right."
She pulled back and held her sister in front of her. "Promise me."
Stassi studied her for several seconds. "Jackie."
"Don't Jackie me. Promise." She shook her sister, strengthened by her conviction. "Don't tell anyone."
Tears fell from Stassi's eyes, and she nodded. "I promise."
Her spine straightened. She wiped her sister's cheeks and pinched some color into them.
"Don't make me regret it," whispered Stassi.
"I won't. You know, I would never do anything to hurt any of you." She hooked her arm through Stassi's and stepped toward the door. "Let's go back inside and celebrate having our family all back together."
Doing things on her own and trusting her gut was part of living an independent life away from Brikken. She could date who she wanted, do things people couldn't tie to Brikken, and be loved for being Jacqueline and not Chief Stanton's daughter. That's what she wanted.
Chapter 29
Elling stopped a block away from the Colman Hotel. Marcus, riding beside him, pulled in front of him and careened his neck to look at why he'd stopped. They'd left the clubhouse with the purpose of running the engine hot on Marcus's Harley after topping off the oil.
"What's wrong?" yelled Marcus.
He shut off his engine, got off the bike, and walked to his MC brother. "I have something I need to do."
"Hell, man. It's almost five o'clock. We're going to get caught in traffic in a few minutes if we don't cross the Willamette River now."
He lifted his chin. "Go on."
"Sure?"
"Ja. This is personal." He stepped away.
Marcus entered traffic and rode away. Elling walked to the end of the block and crossed the street. Jacqueline would be working.
He counted on her being too professional to yell at him or call security when he showed up. It'd give him time to get a few things off his chest. Last time he'd tried to talk with her, he'd become frustrated finding her little hellion of a sister in the room and having to fight her off.
Striding up the sidewalk, he forced the other pedestrians out of his way. He walked through the front door of the hotel and up to the desk by the time Jackie looked up with a smile on her face.
He grabbed that happiness before she hid it from him. His gut tightened. She darted her gaze around the lobby, probably searching for an escape.
He stood in front of her desk and planted his hands on the surface. "I'm coming back when you get off work. Let me in your room."
"No." She looked down at his hands.
"We need to talk."
She pursed her lips. "Not here."
"Where?"
"There's a coffee shop two doors up the block. They're open until two in the morning." She refused to look at him. "I get off at eleven o'clock, and can meet you there."
"If you're not there, I'll come here," he said, needing her to know he wouldn't be stood up.
She lifted her chin, gazed into his eyes, and nodded. He sprawled his hands and leaned in. It'd been almost two weeks without touching her. He needed to feel her in his arms and bring her back to him.
"You need to go before I get in trouble," she whispered.
He damned the situation. Nothing should come between him and his woman.
His woman.
He hadn't thought of staking a claim on her, but that's how he was feeling. She was the woman for him. He wouldn't allow another man to have what belonged to him.
In secret or in front of the world, he wanted there to be no questions that he was responsible for Jacqueline. That the Brikken tattoo was only a reminder of her past. She belonged to him as a Slag member.
"Eleven o'clock." He stepped back without taking his gaze off her.
The feelings she had for him weren't lost. She was holding on tightly to them, but they were there. He'd swear on his life.
Her neck spasmed as she swallowed. He hardened himself for her to argue, but she said no more to him.
Turning, he walked out the door. He only had a few more hours to wait.
Then, she'd be his.
Chapter 30
Elling stood outside the coffee shop on the sidewalk. Jackie hurried toward him. It was almost midnight, having taken the time after work to change her clothes. She preferred other people not knowing she worked at Hotel Colman because of her work uniform when she was handling something personal.
She arrived in front of him out of breath. Not from physical exertion but because she was scared. Scared that what she wanted would be torn away from her or his reasons for seeing her was something different than she hoped for.
His gaze swept down her body and back up to her eyes. "You came."
"I'm a Stanton. My word is good." She cringed internally. Why had she said that? It was something Stassi would say. Or, Chief.
He stepped back and opened the door. She walked in front of him. It was awkward and wonderful at the same time. She'd never gone out with him on a date. The times she'd been with him had been hidden away in a hotel room.
Spotting an empty table in the back of the room, she wound her way past the other customers and sat down. Elling stood, looking around the room. She watched him in amusement. If he would've plunked himself down in a seat without learning about his surroundings first, she would've stayed on guard and aware of what was happening around her.
Elling pulled his chair around until the back was facing the wall and sat. It put him closer to her, but she accepted his intent for what it was. He wouldn't allow anyone to sneak up on him, which made her relax a little because it was hard enough for her to concentrate when he was near.
A waitress arrived at the table to take their orders. She asked for a cinnamon roll Frappuccino because of the late hour.
"What can I get for you?" The waitress directed her attention to Elling.
"Just a coffee," he said.
The waitress smiled at him. "Americano, white—?"
"Just coffee." Elling leaned back in his chair.
"Flavor? Cream...?"
He glanced at Jackie and flashed his attention back to the waitress with a deadpan expression. She pressed her lips together in amusement, waiting to hear what he had to say to get his preferred drink.
"Just coffee. Pour it straight out of the pot. Don't add anything to it. Then, bring it to me," said Elling. "Please."
When the waitress left, he said, "She seemed to have a difficult time understanding me."
"You don't visit coffee shops often, do you?"
"Nei. First time," he said.
She propped her elbows on the table and leaned her cheek against her clasped hands, loving the way he talked. "Not many people drink their coffee black or without sugar."
"Everyone does." He frowned. "How do you drink yours?"
"Wait and see." She lifted her brows. "I'll let you taste mine."
His gaze warmed and intensified. Her stomach fluttered. The way he looked...yeah, her mind went right to something else they could do together, too.
Luckily, the waitress brought their drinks, distracting her from her fantasies. She ripped the protective paper on her straw and put it in her drink, pushing the Frappuccino toward Elling.
He looked at her twice, then sucked on the straw. Tonight's serious conversation put on hold as she got used to having a crowd around her.
The subject matter was not something she wanted broadcasted around the room.
"What do you think?" she asked.
"Cold." He gave her back the drink. "It tastes like a sugary milkshake rather than coffee."
"Yeah, but it's delicious." She took another drink. "I don't drink hot coffee late at night because it wires me up, but this doesn't seem to bother me."
He lifted his mug to his lips, drank, and grunted. She studied him as he put the drink back on the table. It would take him a while to get used to someone else's coffee.
"About me leaving that day..." He caught her gaze. "Are you going to be okay with me not mentioning certain things while we're here?"
She nodded, understanding he wouldn't talk about either motorcycle club while in the company of others.
"I left to follow our friend that morning in the parking garage for the purpose of protecting my club." His hand came an inch off the table, emphasizing his words. "I had no idea our friend was going after someone else."
Her mouth dried, despite the drink in front of her. She was usually good at reading a person to tell if they spoke the truth, but Elling had her confused.
She wanted to believe him. Selfishly, she wanted to welcome him back into her life and pick up where they'd left off.
She'd gamble her heart away for another chance with him. But she had her family to think about, too.
"Let's say that's true and I'm not saying it isn't. There are reasons why I believe you now, and I wasn't the last time you tried to talk to me." She leaned closer. "I don't know anything about what you and my family have going on between you both or anyone's intent toward the other. I only know being with you wouldn't go over well. Can we concentrate on that right now?"
"Ja."
"It would be bad."
"I imagine it would be," he mumbled. "I don't back away."
"Neither do they." She inhaled deeply.
He took another drink and grimaced. She picked up her cup and turned the straw toward her. They were only going through the motions of working things out.
Coming here was a bad idea, but it was the only way she could think that they'd have an opportunity to talk without being alone together in the same room. Being around others kept her from losing her temper and saying something she shouldn't.
"What would happen if you made the choice to be with me?" He ran his tongue over his top lip. "Will they cut you off?"
"They're family. They'd never turn their back on me."
"Then, what stops you?"
Her throat closed and she stared at the table. She'd wondered the same thing. The worst thing imaginable was disappointing Chief. Her relationship with the whole family would shift. There would be no more Family Day at the clubhouse for her. She wouldn't know what was going on with Brikken—not that she ever knew the small details, but she knew enough. They wouldn't trust her with any information because of who she loved.
"They would never accept you, and I'd feel distant from them over time because my heart and loyalty would fall to you." She swallowed. "That's if they let you live."
He shifted on the seat and leaned toward her. "We would accept you," he said quietly.
Her pulse thrummed. She shook her head. "I don't want to be accepted by them. I only want you."
"I want you, too." He reached across the table, hooked the back of her neck, bringing her closer. "I walked out of the hotel earlier knowing I couldn't let you go. I won't."
"You did?" she whispered.
His gaze intensified, and he held her in front of him for several heartbeats. "I need to get out of here."
"You need to go?" She trembled.
"Nei." His fingers tightened on her neck. "I need to touch you."
She put her hand in her pocket and pulled out a twenty-dollar bill. Elling caught her wrist as she held up the money, trying to get the waitress's attention.
"Put it away." He motioned for the woman responsible for their table and slipped her money from his vest without letting go of Jackie.
He pulled her from the table, tucking her against his side, and walked out of the coffee shop. With her arm around his back, she leaned into him, thankful she changed into sneakers to keep up with his longer stride.
Now that she had her hands on him, she couldn't stop touching him.
She inhaled the leathery scent coming off him and sighed contently. It was a smell that brought her comfort and love. On him, it was thrilling and new.
The last couple of weeks had been the worst days of her life. The back and forth tug-of-war of her thoughts. One minute hating him. The next, loving him.
Every emotion heightened. Deep down, she knew she'd never be able to walk away from him.
He stopped. She looked up at him, realizing her vision was wonky.
Elling swiped her cheek with his thumb. "What's the matter?"
She rolled to the front of him and locked her hands behind his back and tilted her face. "I'm obsessed with you. I've been feeling like I'm going crazy."
"You're not crazy."
"There were so many times I panicked over the last couple of weeks. I needed you, and I looked around, trying to find you because I knew even with us fighting and my family...and your club, you would help me."
"I would've." He stroked her cheeks with his thumbs. "I would do anything."
"How can I have a life full of people who love me and want to take care of me, but all I want is you?"
His gaze softened. "I'm going to be there for you. Whenever. Wherever. You're not going to lose me."
"Promise?"
He kissed her upturned lips. Her hands slipped down to his ass, squeezing as she pulled herself tight against him, feeling his hardness.
She moaned. "Come up to my room."
"I can't stay." His chest inflated with is breath. "Long."
She stepped away, grabbing his hand, and led him down the block to the front of the hotel. There were no worries about bringing him through the building because he wasn't a guest. She was allowed to have company in her room.
