“Kincade, are you listening to me?”

  “Always,” I said without thinking. I wasn’t listening. I didn’t even know she was talking. I was too busy thinking of all the ways I wanted to make her my home.

  Irritation had worked its way into her soft voice. “Don’t blame me when things go left because you weren’t listening.”

  “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

  Her features softened instantly. She wiggled her brows and shot me an amused smirk. “I see you’re already in character.”

  “I—”

  “Let me grab my bag and we can go.” She kept talking like I hadn’t tried to interrupt her.

  My hand caught her wrist before she got too far, and when she turned to look at me, I could read the question in her eyes.

  “What is it?”

  “I’m not playing a role when I tell you you’re beautiful, E.”

  She dropped her gaze to where my hand still grasped her wrist and nodded. “Right…okay.”

  Gripping her chin, I repeated, “The most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

  Week five continued

  7. ERICKA

  “I just realized I don’t know any of your hobbies,” I pointed out as Jonah sped down 95. After I was dressed, he drove us up to West Palm so he could change, and now we were headed back south to Delray to meet his family.

  Zigzagging up and down Palm Beach didn’t bother me when I got to look at Jonah like this.

  He’d ditched his usual Levi’s and changed into a pair of black slacks and a maroon button-up that he’d left untucked. The sleeves were cuffed, showcasing his thick forearms. And he’d left the first three buttons undone. A simple gold rope chain rested against his exposed skin, and my mouth hadn’t stopped watering since he walked out of his bedroom and said, “Let’s go.”

  “Why do you need to know my hobbies?”

  “Because I’m going to meet your family. It makes sense that I would know these things. Besides, it’s more believable if we have shared interests.”

  “I like taking care of what’s mine.” He spared me a sidelong glance before focusing on the road. “Whether that’s my woman, my business, my home, or my cars. Everything connected to me needs to reflect how much I care.”

  His voice was rough as sandpaper as his hand flexed on the wheel, and the sound made me cross and uncross my legs.

  “Those aren’t exactly hobbies, Kincade.”

  The look he tossed me said make it enough, and I clamped my mouth shut before my flippant retort could form.

  Thankfully, he decided to be helpful and provide a solution. “Just say we connected over football. Because of your brother. It’s not a complete lie.”

  “Fine. How long have we been together?”

  “Three years.”

  “THREE?”

  “Yes.”

  “How am I supposed to explain my absence?”

  “I always told them you were busy with work or visiting family out of state.”

  “And they believed you?”

  He shook his head slightly and changed lanes as we came up on our exit. “Not really. They gave me an ultimatum today, and that’s why you’re here.”

  “But why me? You could have gotten anyone to play your girlfriend. Probably someone more believable.”

  As we rolled to a stop at the light right off the exit, he turned to look at me full-on. Red light illuminated his serious features when he said, “There’s no one else I wanted to ask. It was either you or no one.”

  Gulping, I shifted my gaze to the dashboard. I needed to ground myself in reality and remind myself that I was only here to play a role tonight. “You mean, it was either me or the woman they wanted to set you up with. Is she really that bad?”

  “No.” He shook his head. “She’s just not you.”

  The light turned green as I watched him from the corner of my eye. His face was impassive. Like he hadn’t just said something that sent me into a tailspin trying to process it.

  She’s just not you.

  What was he saying? And why did his words keep creating a palpable pulse between my legs?

  “Now that I think about it, why haven’t I ever seen you date?”

  In the three years I’d been in Palm Beach, I’d never seen a woman hanging off of his arm. What gave?

  Did he only call on women when he needed sex?

  I wasn’t naive to the fact that men had needs. So even if he liked being single, there had to be a handful of women he could call at a drop of a dime. Women who weren’t me. Women who didn’t collapse into nothingness when things got too difficult. Women who—

  “I’ve already answered your question, E. How many different ways do you want me to say it?”

  His fingers flexed against the wheel, prompting me to recall a blurry image from weeks ago.

  Clearing my throat, I said, “That first day you showed up at my house, your knuckles were bruised. Why?”

  “Why are you asking me that now?”

  “Because I just remembered.”

  “I ran into your little friend.”

  My face fell. “My little friend?”

  Jonah didn’t look at me but said, “Arthur,” in a bored tone.

  Aaron.

  “He tried to fight me. I was defending myself.”

  “Are you lying?”

  “Yes.”

  I bit down my smile and shook my head as we got closer to our destination.

  As an RN, I had shit to lose and couldn’t go around catching battery and aggravated assault charges whenever someone disrespected me. No matter how much they deserved it.

  Too many times I had to be the bigger person when in reality, I wanted to drag some people to hell for the way they played in my face.

  But Jonah? The stakes were different for him.

  I didn’t know everything, but I knew he’d made enough under-the-table deals with the right people to fly under the radar when it came to certain…proclivities.

  “How did you find out?” There were far more pressing questions, but I settled on that one.

  “Hacked his phone.”

  “Oh.”

  Silence cloaked the car as he steered his chrome Maybach with one hand. His clothes weren’t the only thing he’d changed at his apartment. I felt like royalty as we glided effortlessly across the road in the luxury car.

  As my mind quieted, I was hit with the realization of what him hacking Aaron’s phone meant, and that made me shift uncomfortably in my seat.

  My face flamed with the heat of embarrassment. He’d read the messages that Aaron sent me? The ones where he told me he fantasized about other women in order to finish when he slept with me? The ones where he told me I wasn’t special? The ones where he made it very clear that it was my fault for not capturing his attention or his respect long enough to keep him interested.

  Nausea twisted my gut.

  The rest of the ride to the restaurant was completed in tense silence, and when we pulled up to the valet stand, I was desperate for the fresh night air that hit my face once I got out the car.

  I couldn’t even appreciate the tasteful multi-color lights illuminating the exterior of the stone building before Jonah met me on the sidewalk, blocking my view with his brows pinched.

  “You mad at me?”

  I shook my head.

  I wasn’t mad, I was embarrassed. Fucking humiliated. This was what I got for asking questions I wasn’t ready to hear the answers to.

  “You want me to take you home and forget about this?”

  “No.”

  “Then why are you frowning?”

  The answer to his question was simple—I didn’t even know I was frowning. But I was positive the expression on my face now that he was holding me was ten times worse.

  I got lost in the depth of his gaze and tried to redirect my thoughts. Away from Aaron. Away from the realization that Jonah knew the type of men I’d tolerated. Away from…this.

  Shit. Maybe I did want to go home.

  “I didn’t know you knew about Aaron.” And now that I do, I want to hide.

  “You think I look at you differently for the shit he said in those messages.”

  It wasn’t a question. He was stating it as a fact after reading my face for point two seconds.

  “Look at me.”

  My eyes fluttered up to meet his.

  “There is nothing he or anybody could say to make me look at you differently.”

  I knew he was placating me but gave a weak nod and brittle smile. “Okay.”

  Jonah leaned forward, searching my face before he dropped his head beside mine and gave me the reassurance I hadn’t asked for. “I’m serious, Ericka. I know what I have to say doesn’t change how much it hurt in the moment. As long as you know that he will never talk to you like that again. He already knows I’ll kill him slowly if he so much as thinks about you again.”

  He spoke calmly, his cheek pressed against mine. To outsiders, it probably looked like he was whispering sweet nothings in my ear. And from my reaction, those assumptions would be confirmed.

  My skin misted, my heart fluttered, and my palms itched to touch him.

  Jesus, be a fence.

  “Are you okay?” he asked, pulling away to look at me again.

  So many things had shifted between us in the last few weeks and I was still trying to catch up. My brain, heart, and pussy were in three different time zones fighting to process everything, and it just left me feeling unsettled.

  His hand cupped the side of my face, and the rough pad of his thumb brushed over my cheek. Shivers chased away the all-consuming warmth I felt seconds ago. Then, he shifted forward and let his forehead rest against mine.

  Finally, I nodded.

  “Then fix your face, Ericka. And let’s go meet my family.”

  ◆◆◆

  “So, how long have you been dating my cousin?” the woman who’d been introduced to me as “Loli” asked as she pushed her salad around on her plate.

  “Three years,” I answered, providing the answer that Jonah and I rehearsed on the way to the restaurant.

  Three years was still a stretch to me, but I was going with the flow. There was no way I’d be able to lie to my family that long without a single receipt. But Jonah claimed he knew what he was talking about. So, like I said, I was going with the flow.

  The most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.

  His words weren’t the problem. The problem was the look in his eyes when he said it. His eyes penetrated every layer of defense I usually had at the ready and saw straight through to my soul.

  He meant every word he’d said, and I was still trying to make heads or tails of it at this dinner table.

  Jonah had seen me at my absolute lowest point and refused to let me plummet. He was beside me on the days I didn’t wash my face, brush my teeth, or change clothes for days at a time.

  How the hell could he call that beautiful?

  I didn’t notice there was a grimace on my face until Loli’s smile slipped.

  “Did I say something that made you uncomfortable?

  “No, you didn’t make me uncomfortable. I just got lost in thought for a second. I’m sorry.”

  “Girl, you don’t have to apologize. I’m just happy to finally meet you. He talks about you all the time.” She propped her chin up with her hand and beamed at me. “So, what’s your secret? Spill on how you tolerate that man for longer than an hour. He used to terrorize me growing up and hasn’t really stopped now that we’re adults.”

  I knew she was teasing. Just making conversation. But a part of me wouldn’t allow me to pass up the opportunity to sing Jonah’s praises.

  I spoke straight from the heart. “Your cousin gets me in ways I don’t even understand. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

  Ericka from five weeks ago would have balked at that statement, especially saying it with a straight face. But I didn’t even feel like the same woman from five weeks ago.

  My eyes wandered over the freckles splattered against her toffee skin as she gave me a dreamy sigh.

  “Ugh, that’s so freaking sweet.” She dropped her fork and focused all of her attention on me. “And I can tell he feels the same.”

  My cheeks flushed at her observation. Why was I blushing over something fake? I should have felt guilty for the way we were lying to his family.

  Loli hit me with another dreamy sigh. “One day it’ll be my turn. Keep doing whatever you’re doing. I’ve never seen him like this.”

  “Like what?” I asked.

  Loli’s smile widened. “Like this. He can’t keep his hands, lips, or eyes off you.”

  Right on cue, Jonah leaned over and kissed my temple.

  Under the table, his fingers hadn’t stopped lazily grazing my palm, and an unexpected rush of familiarity settled over me.

  This shouldn’t have felt so natural.

  I was just here on a favor.

  So, why didn’t it feel like that?

  JONAH

  To say my family loved Ericka would be an understatement.

  They were smitten with her. Immediately.

  Stars in their eyes and goofy smiles on their faces.

  I’d never seen my mother this open with a stranger or heard my father speak so much. He was somebody who liked being seen and not heard, but he couldn’t stop asking her questions.

  And Ericka wasn’t making it any better. She answered every question, no matter how out of pocket, with a graceful smile that just invited them to dig even deeper.

  As soon as we were seated, I grabbed her hand under the table, thinking I was offering comfort, but really, that’s what she was doing for me.

  My fingertips skated over her soft palms mindlessly as we talked. Every time she tilted her head to smile at me or let her eyes snag on mine for a second too long, my ability to act ‘normal’ dwindled a little more.

  Especially when she leaned to her left to hear something my cousin was asking but pulled my hand along with her, making sure there wasn’t a moment of separation.

  It was like she’d fully accepted her role as my emotional support for the night. Or…she was a really good actress.

  On my right, my mother nudged me with her shoulder and spoke directly into my ear.

  “Oh, JoJo, I’m so happy she could make it,” she gushed on a whisper like she hadn’t coerced this meeting. “She’s so sweet. And I can tell she loves you as much as you love her.”

  Guilt sat at the pit of my gut like a lead weight. And my dad just added another layer when he leaned forward and beamed at me. Pride was apparent in his eyes, but so was relief.

  Fuck.

  “I know you don’t like our meddling, but we didn’t want you to end up alone,” my mother said softly. “We know some people choose that route, but I knew it would never be for you. You love too hard and want too much out of life to not share it with someone.”

  Another wave of guilt washed over me.

  I was going to hell for lying to my parents. Plain and simple.

  As soon as I had that thought, Ericka laced her fingers with mine under the table. She was still talking to my cousin, but the energy in her touch grounded me before my thoughts spiraled.

  I could bring a man within an inch of his life with a straight face, but I couldn’t keep my cool through one dinner with my parents?

  The stakes were different. The stakes were always higher when Ericka was involved.

  Week five continued

  8. ERICKA

  When I told Jonah I wasn’t ready to go home once we left Kaleidoscope, I wasn’t expecting a long walk on the beach. Especially when I wasn’t even sure we were allowed to be on said beach.

  Ignoring my protests about public access being closed, he walked over to my side of the car and opened the door for me. But instead of stepping back so I could get out, he dropped into a squat and undid the straps on my shoes.

  He’d pulled his car right up on the beach, so when I stepped out, my toes sank into the sand.

  For someone who lived so close to the beach, I rarely came. It was always work, or being tired from work. Or me simply not wanting to come alone.

  But now that I was here, I couldn’t deny the grounding effect of hearing the water wash up on the shore before being carried back out.

  The moon sat in the inky night sky, hidden behind thick clouds. The muted glow provided just enough light for me to see in front of myself as I walked along the water’s edge. But Jonah’s hand didn’t stray far from my back either.

  The steady pressure at the small of my back served as a welcome reminder that he wouldn’t let me stumble.

  The first ten minutes we walked in complete silence. It was more peaceful than awkward and gave me enough time to partially decompress after the dinner we’d just had.

  “Your family’s sweet, JoJo.”

  Jonah scoffed at the use of his nickname.

  “What? You don’t like that name?”

  “You can call me whatever you want, love.”

  My steps stuttered at that damn pet name, but I played it off by tugging at my pant legs and shaking off some of the sand at the bottom.

  “Do you want me to carry you?” he offered softly as he watched me.

  “No,” I said, shaking my head, but I held fast to his forearm as we continued to walk. “I can manage.”

  For the first time in a long time, my mind was completely at peace. There weren’t a million made-up scenarios dancing around my skull. The numbness I’d been trying to shake for weeks was just…gone.

  I wasn’t clear on when the heaviness had lifted and made room for the giddiness I felt right now, but I welcomed it with as much calm as I could. I didn’t want to scare the feeling away by thinking about it too hard. It’d been running from me for too long for me to fuck this up.

  My nose burned with happy tears, and I stopped walking to look over at Jonah, who didn’t miss a beat.

 

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