Dungeon dive, p.17
DUNGEON DIVE, page 17
“What the heck is going on?”
I couldn’t accept the fact that I couldn’t fathom Master’s feelings, and my whole body was shaking. He was someone whose feelings were utterly lost on me—someone I loved, at that. I never thought it would be this disheartening or terrifying. In my whole life, it had never happened to me before. I boasted an advantage that other people didn’t: the Perception skill. Thanks to that, this had never happened to me. Even with Master, who was good at deceiving himself, and with Ms. Lastiara (her being her), there was never a moment where I had absolutely no inkling whatsoever of what was going through their minds. Until now.
“Could it be? Not again... Did these eyes doom me again?”
An old memory resurfaced. Images of the village, of ____, burning thanks to the conclusion I had come to via Perception.
Wait. ___? Huh? What the... What’s ___? The word won’t come out? Is it that I can’t remember? What was it I lost again?
“All, all right, calm down. First things first, just calm down...”
I tried regaining my composure through my tried-and-true method. Back in the village, and during the war, and after I had become a slave, not one good thing had ever come from losing my presence of mind. I took deep breaths and took the time to sort through my muddled thoughts. This was the first time I was completely stumped as to what Master was thinking. But in a way, wasn’t that what interpersonal relationships always entailed? It would be ridiculous to count on understanding everything all of the time.
Indeed. This skill of mine was what was truly odd. But I put aside my rage against my eyes for the time being. What was important right now was being calm. Priority number one was predicting his next actions.
He had indeed said he didn’t like Ms. Lastiara in that way. But that was the point where it had all started going amiss. He was clearly laughing at something in particular and was angered by that something as well. I just didn’t know what it was. I did know that something wasn’t me or he himself.
Calmly, I assembled all the puzzle pieces, the information I had gathered thus far. I had to take a wider vantage point, considering not just how Master and Ms. Lastiara had acted that day, but everything else too. I searched for the primary factor, and then it dawned on me. I recalled what Ms. Alty had told me.
“They’re not about to change. It’s just that the people around them don’t approve of that.”
I figured that might have been what had given rise to this situation. Nothing else sprang to mind. To sum it up, Master had been changed by outside hands. And the only outside force that I could think of was the knights of Whoseyards. If they used the most cutting-edge drugs or magic tools on offer in a large nation like Whoseyards, it might not be out of the question. Maybe he was forced to change through some nefarious means, and he had just realized that, started laughing and fuming at his own gutlessness, and then left to save Ms. Lastiara? The chances of it were high. In fact, if that wasn’t the case, then why would he go out like that, right then and there? The only reason he could have had for leaving me alone in that moment was to go save Ms. Lastiara. If he’d gone to the Dungeon, he would’ve used his magic door instead.
Which led me to my ultimate inference. Master left me behind, telling me nothing, to go where Ms. Lastiara was?
“N-No, not that. Anything but that...”
The answer I had come to left my body shaking from head to toe. The situation was too similar to when I had made that blunder back in my hometown. It was that horrible incident all over again. Once more, I was going to lose everything that was important to me.
I couldn’t handle it. I ran outside and tried to dash towards Whoseyards. But a man was standing in the middle of the path, and I stopped in my tracks.
This was my third encounter with him. I had met him at the slave market, and then again at the pub with Ms. Alty.
My Perception skill was sounding alarm bells, screaming that the tall man with the sharp features before me was a threat. The corners of his mouth curled as he approached me.
“So, we meet again.”
That smile was still pasted onto his face, as ever.
“I’m in a hurry. Please step aside.” I figured I shouldn’t get near this guy, so I was blunt. Not that he cared.
“I reckon it’s about time. I came to see how you’re doing.”
“About time?”
I didn’t know what he was saying. All I knew was that whatever it was, it wasn’t on the level. I decided not to give him the time of day and attempted to go around him. But his next words stopped me in my tracks.
“Aren’t there some things you’d like to ask a Whoseyards man? I may look like this, but I’m a real eminent sir knight of Whoseyards, I’ll have ya know. I’ve got deep ties with milady Lastiara and with ol’ Sieg. If you want, you can ask me for advice.”
“Wait...you’re a knight of Whoseyards?”
If he was, then that made him one of the people I suspected of leading Master astray.
“Yep, in the flesh.”
I could feel the blood rush to my head. My emotions, which had had no outlet, now found a target in a knight of Whoseyards and came flowing to the fore.
“Wh-What did you people do to Master?! He’s been acting so strangely! He’s acting stranger and stranger because he’s been consorting with you Whoseyards people!!!” I shrieked.
But the man remained unruffled, replying coolly, “We did do something, but only to our lady, Lastiara. We didn’t do anything to Sieg.”
“You lie! I know that you people are trying to use him! That’s why you cast a spell on him, right? You’re trying to control him!”
“Nope, didn’t cast any spells on him. And you of all people should be able to tell I’m not lying,” he said, pointing to his own eyes.
It seemed that through his own skill, which was similar to mine, he’d detected my having Perception. And he was telling me to use my eyes to verify his claims. But I’d already determined their veracity. I knew full well that he wasn’t lying. Even so, I no longer knew what I could have faith in. I bit my lip.
“If that’s so, why is Master in such a state?!”
“I haven’t seen what state you’re referring to, so I can’t say, but there is something I do know.”
A pause. “Please tell me.”
“I know that at the end of the day, for one reason or another, Sieg can’t abandon anyone,” he answered readily. “He may suffer, he may swing back and forth, he may make loads of mistakes, but in the end, he can’t forsake anyone he’s emotionally connected to. That’s just the sort of guy Siegfried Vizzita is.”
Master was kind, so he had gone to save her. This man was stating definitively that that was all there was to it. I didn’t want to acknowledge it. Maybe because I wanted to hog his kindness for myself. Maybe for some other reason.
“That may be so. He certainly has that quality. But even more so than being kind, he’s cowardly, indecisive, and pitiful! He’d never normally risk trying to save her!”
“I’m sure you’re right. It’s just as you say. I’m fully aware of that too.” The man didn’t deny it. He continued to agree with my remarks. “He’s a coward, so he fears the Dungeon. He’s indecisive, which ends up wounding his comrades, and he doesn’t say what he wants to say. But the boy’s only strong point is Dungeon diving. That’s just how Sieg is. He was worse in the beginning. There’s no way he’s got the guts to save someone if it means antagonizing an entire nation.”
“Right? So—” I tried to use the words of the man who was agreeing with me to push forward my own opinion, but I was interrupted by his nasty smile.
“Ha ha. So, I daresay Sieg is striving to change as a person. He’s doing his best to get stronger so he can bring about a better outcome, don’t ya think?”
I couldn’t say no. I wasn’t in any way confident that he was mistaken. What if, hypothetically, he was spot on? If Master became even stronger, he’d go to some far-off heights with Ms. Lastiara. Heights I could never reach. All I’d done was learn a little fire magic. Him leaving me behind was a foregone conclusion.
Hold on...no. Maybe he’s already left me behind?
I was alone in the house, after all. I was the only one left.
“Th-That can’t... I don’t know about something like that. I’ve never seen anything like that...”
“I’m sure. That’s the limit you hit when you rely on eye skills too much, little lady. You never actually understood the first thing about Sieg.”
Master was trying to change? I hadn’t noticed because I was relying too much on Perception? I’d made yet another mistake thanks to my eyes? Master’s heart had turned stronger before I knew it, and he’d actively gained the will to fight against the colossal barrier called Whoseyards? That was why he had gotten angry with Whoseyards and was trying to save Ms. Lastiara?
“Now then, little lady, there’s no time left. Come tomorrow, Sieg’s likely gonna run off to rescue milady. And since he’ll have grown stronger, he’ll probably do a bang-up job and succeed.”
Arghh... He’ll actually save her; I just know it.
Master was strong. His heart was that of a boy, but if we were talking just his abilities, he was like an old veteran hero. I was sure he would save her in dramatic fashion and then advance even further.
“If that happens, the hero Sieg and the heroine Lastiara will be united through a predestined bond. It’ll tie their knot, if you catch my meaning.”
As the hero and heroine of the story, the two whose “knot” was tied would go on to the next stage. And would I be there? Me? A minor role in a previous chapter? Would I have my turn on that next stage?
No. Almost certainly not. A character without a role to play was only going to get written out.
“Ahh, but you know, you don’t have anything, little lady. You and Sieg can’t understand one another, you don’t have any connection to speak of, and you don’t have the strength to follow in his wake.”
He was right. I had nothing. I lacked Ms. Lastiara’s perfection. I had no beauty. My personality sucked. I wasn’t from a respectable family, and my past wasn’t special enough to involve nations. I had no talent, no power. And since I had nothing, there was no way I could stand beside Master. He would leave me in the dust.
“All you have left is the unilaterally secured agreement regarding your master-servant relationship. An agreement that we can’t even be sure Sieg is aware of.”
He didn’t have to tell me. I already knew. It was precisely because I knew it that I desired an alternate bond. I wanted strength. I’d sacrifice whatever it took in order to obtain that which Master wanted more than anything.
“It... It’s...” I said in between short gasps. “It’s still okay. If I just get strong, strong magic...”
I pointed out the potential that I possessed so that I didn’t get squashed flat by those words. Yet the man continued without mercy.
“You think mages who are more capable than you won’t show up in the future?”
He was trying to crush my hope, delightedly thrusting reality in my face. And I couldn’t deny it. The more time passed, the more people Master would become acquainted with. There was no guarantee that a mage who surpassed me wouldn’t appear. And if that happened, I...
“But hold on! Master told me I could stay here! He said I could cook his meals for him here, and that’s enough!”
“You get it, don’t you? That’s him pitying you. He said that out of sympathy, don’t you see? Food isn’t important to him. He himself is good at cooking, and there are plenty of people to replace you.”
I knew that. I knew that task had been given to me out of consideration for my feelings. He didn’t actually need my cooking.
My heart was shedding tears. I could hear it moaning, weeping.
“But... But Master didn’t say he would go! He hasn’t yet! He hasn’t breathed a word that he’d go to where she is!” I didn’t want to look reality in the face. I was hanging on to that slender ray of hope.
“Are your glasses truly that rose-tinted?”
“I haven’t heard a word about it from him! Master hasn’t gone to whatever stupid place Ms. Lastiara is! Starting tomorrow, we’ll be alone together again! We’ll progress through the Dungeon, just the two of us, once again!”
Upon seeing me stubbornly shake my head, the man shrugged in exasperation, turning his back to me as he left me some parting words. “You can believe that if you like. But you do realize that if luck’s not on your side, he may just leave you along with the whole house? Mull it over, little lady.”
With that, the man left the scene. His words struck a chord. All this time, I’d been kept in the dark and out of the loop. And today, I’d been left alone in the house yet again. I was unable to keep up with them, and they’d left both me and the house in their wake. That was everything I needed to know.
The fear from when I had fallen into slavery came roaring back.
Once again, ____ left my side. And just like I’d lost ____, ____, and ____, I’d now lose Master too.
That terror rocked me from head to toe, and I fell to my knees. My head was still swimming as I got to my feet, and I started walking dazedly like a ghost. I stalked the streets of Vart in search of Master, checking locations I thought he might have headed to. I scoured the pub, the churches, the shops vending Dungeon necessities. But he was nowhere to be found. And that could only mean he’d gone someplace that wasn’t Vart.
I put one foot in front of the other, suppressing the urge to hurl. I just wanted to see him.
I can’t stand being alone. I hate it. I can’t take it anymore.
That was running on repeat in my head when I bumped into a familiar face. I was walking down the street when a red-haired girl appeared out of nowhere with a shimmer of hot air.
“Ms. Alty!”
Having found a confidante I could depend on, I approached her, tears in my eyes. She greeted me with her own affectionate, benevolent eyes.
“Mar-Mar, you okay?”
“Ms. Alty! At this rate, Master... Master’s gonna...”
“I know, Mar-Mar. Calm down. It’s gonna be okay, so calm down.” She held my head and caressed me. With each stroke, I grew a little calmer.
“Ms. Alty...I think Master and Ms. Lastiara are gonna run off someplace without me. And then, and then, I...”
“You’re still good, Mar-Mar. I met with Sieg a moment ago.”
“You met with Master?”
I felt a modicum of relief hearing someone I trusted mention the one I loved by name.
“He hasn’t gone anywhere yet. He’s gonna be home in no time.”
That sliver of relief ballooned inside my heart. Those words—“he’s gonna be home”—returned a smidgen of my composure.
“But from what I’ve seen, I don’t know if Sieg’s gonna go save her or not. Sorry. Probably can’t know until tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow, you say?”
A sense of discomfort. The sensation I felt whenever Perception came across some contradiction or inconsistency. But I didn’t want to distrust my confidante, so I didn’t press. Besides, at this stage, I’d totally stopped trusting in my eyes. The only person I could trust was the one who had gone out of her way to help me thus far.
“Yep. If he’s gonna save her, it’ll have to be early tomorrow morning. Which is why you’ve gotta be by his side tomorrow morning no matter what, Mar-Mar. Then you can check and see. See everything, that is,” she said earnestly.
Ms. Alty was telling me of a way to comprehend Master’s feelings. She was always doing her utmost for my sake. I didn’t have it in me to doubt her spirit.
“Okay...so it’s tomorrow...”
“Yep, do that tomorrow. Everything happens after that. Now then, let’s go back a sec.”
She and I returned to the house. Then she left, but not before promising to meet me the next day. She said she had a lot on her plate that day, so I couldn’t stop her from leaving.
Holding on to the hope that Ms. Alty had given me, I waited for Master in the otherwise unoccupied house. The Whoseyards knight had pompously crowed that Master would save Ms. Lastiara, but it wasn’t set in stone. Ms. Alty had said it wasn’t a foregone conclusion, which meant that without a doubt, there was hope left.
As I brooded, I stayed home, practicing my magic and cooking. During that time, Master returned.
He came home! Just like Ms. Alty said: he came home! I received him with a smile. I knew it. It was all in my head. It’s obvious we’re gonna go back to our life with just the two of us now.
Certain of that, I greeted Master. We ate together and talked a little too. Nothing felt odd or off. The topic of Ms. Lastiara never came up. Perhaps out of fear, I unconsciously never mentioned it.
After our meal, he went right to his room. It was only later that night that something strange cropped up. Curious about how Master was, I noticed cold air leaking from the gap under the door when I passed by his room. I focused on the room’s interior to ascertain the cause.
The flow of that magic energy rang a bell. It was the same as when I was practicing my fire magic. Master was practicing ice magic in his room. And he was trying to cook up spells at a level beyond anything he’d done before, to boot. As I’d been doing the same, I could tell.
“Why’s he practicing magic now?”
If it was for the Dungeon’s sake, I didn’t mind. In that case, he’d just use the magic to dive again and nothing more. But there was a chance that wasn’t the case. Would Master go to the Dungeon the next day or would he go to the cathedral? I couldn’t get it off my mind, and I couldn’t get a wink of sleep that night.
Right next to the room where he was practicing ice magic, I continued practicing fire magic.
“Burn, nixfire! At the mercy of threads and oneiric reeling—”
Over and over and over and over again, I incanted. For some reason, it calmed me down. My emotions peeling off, overflowing, and toppling to one side felt so calming. I got a nagging feeling that something valuable and important was mutating. But even so, I couldn’t stop. If I didn’t keep at it, anxiety threatened to squash me flat.
