Second self, p.8
Second Self, page 8
“I know how lucky we’ve been,” said Sokara. “But the simple fact is that we need more room. People want to come here—”
“Khrill won’t have it,” said Raffi.
“But there’s room, Raffi. There’s room for all of us—”
“You know, the places you’re showing us, they’re working,” said Raffi. “You might want to think carefully about expanding them. You could ruin what you have here—”
“I’m not talking about making these places bigger. I’m talking about new settlements.”
Raffi frowned. “My understanding was that this part of the province had been designated yours, but not beyond. Wouldn’t that mean expanding into Cardassian territory?” She shook her head. “Khrill is never going to accept that—”
“I’m not talking about moving onto Cardassian land. I’m talking about opening up new land.”
It took her a minute before she realized what he was saying. “You mean going to the Caanta valley, don’t you?”
“Yes,” he said.
“Sokara,” she said, “there was a ban on travel up there when I was here—”
“That ban is still in place,” he said. “I want it revoked. Raffi, there’s space up there! Space the Cardassians aren’t using—won’t ever use!”
“They’ll never agree to it.”
“But they might, if you asked them.”
Raffi shook her head.
“The Caanta valley?” said Elnor. “That’s the area beyond the river confluence, isn’t it? Where you took cover…” He eyed Sokara. “In order to stop the massacre.”
“Ah,” said Sokara. “Absolute candor is at work here, I see.”
“Always,” said Elnor.
“Sokara,” said Raffi, intervening before the endless battle between Tal Shiar and Qowat Milat could begin, “I have a question for you. Did you know back then about the travel ban?”
“Yes,” he said.
“I see,” said Raffi. “You know, if I thought that you, or anyone associated with you, was using me—using the refugee crisis—as a cloak for finding out what that ban was all about, I will be pretty annoyed—”
“I’m not offended by that, Raffi. I understand why you say it. There’s no ulterior motive here. If the Tal Shiar want to find out what’s in the Caanta valley, they can do that for themselves. All I want is to help my people. And they need that land.”
“The Tal Shiar,” remarked Elnor, “do not follow the way of absolute candor.” He looked at them both. “What? I’m only telling the truth—”
“I’m not lying,” said Sokara.
“Khrill won’t have it,” said Raffi. “Do you realize how hard I had to work to persuade the Cardassians to go that way, back in the day? Some of them wanted to stay and face you rather than go into that valley—”
“I know there are superstitions attached to the area,” said Sokara.
“They’re not superstitions,” said Raffi. “That place is weird.” Her companions did not reply, and she realized how strange that must have sounded. “It’s not a good place,” she said. “Your people are better off here. Listen. I know they’ve lost their homes. I know how appalling these years have been. But what you’ve got here—what you’ve built—it’s good. It’s so much better than it could have been—”
“This is the truth,” said Elnor. “I grew up on Vashti. There was nothing there. There was no hope.”
“Raffi,” said Sokara, “many of the people here are still separated from their loved ones. Parents, spouses, children, brothers and sisters—stuck in camps on other worlds, waiting for permission to come to Ordeve. But the exarch has severely restricted the numbers of Romulans who can come. She says there’s no more room. But there is room. If we can go beyond the river and settle in the Caanta valley—”
“It’s not going to happen,” said Raffi. “I’m not convinced it should. We don’t know what’s out there.”
“I know that your time there was…” Sokara rubbed his eyes. “I know that we caused terrible distress. I know that what we did—what we tried to do—all those years ago, was unconscionable. Raffi, please. The people here were not part of that. It’s not their fault. They need help. They need your help.”
Aw, hell, thought Raffi. Sokara knew exactly which buttons to press on a Starfleet officer. An appeal to her better nature. An appeal for aid.
“Okay, okay. What do you think I can do?”
The relief on Sokara’s face was palpable. “We can go up there. You and I—”
“I’ll be there too,” said Elnor.
“Of course,” said Sokara. “We go up into the valley and prove once and for all that there’s nothing there. Just space. Show Khrill there’s nothing to be afraid of, that she can lift the ban and let us settle there. That’s all, Raffi. That’s all I’m asking. Go across the river and look.”
It was a bigger ask than perhaps he realized; or perhaps not.
“I’ll come,” she said reluctantly. “Elnor? Ready?”
“Now?” said Elnor.
“I take it you don’t want us to transport there?” said Raffi to Sokara.
“No,” he agreed.
“Why not?” said Elnor.
“The Cardassians would track transporter signals,” said Raffi. “They’d know what we were doing and where we were going. No, we’ll do this the old-fashioned way.”
“What’s that?” said Elnor.
“We’ll walk, Elnor,” she said. “We’ll walk.”
Rios, when she contacted him, was less than enthusiastic. “How’s this helping with the actual mission?”
“It might. It might not. But I have a hunch—”
“Oh, if you’ve had a hunch, that’s okay.”
“This valley. It’s a big unanswered question. What’s out there. And there were rumors at the time that the Obsidian Order had a base there.”
“That’s less a hunch than a reasonable supposition,” said Rios. “Okay, let’s get some answers. We’ll run some scans. See what we can see from up here.”
“Huh,” said Raffi, who had a feeling she knew already where that would lead. “Good luck with that.”
“Rios out.”
A couple of hours later, Cris was back. “This is—”
“Weird? Strange? Uncanny?”
“I was going to say odd, but whatever floats your boat, Raff.”
“Couldn’t find anything, huh?”
“Scans of the area revealed nothing. Which I thought was good—uninhabited area, nothing to fear—until the science team pointed out it meant absolutely nothing. No life signs of wildlife. I asked them to test for radiation levels to see if it had been a test site—again, nothing. Like there’s a blanket over the area.”
“Sounds familiar.”
“And then we got some information from Bajoran Intelligence. They’re sure there was a sighting of Garak in the area three weeks ago.”
Again, that alarm. Faintly, the sound of a door creaking slowly shut.
“Raffi, are you sure about this?”
“I think it’s unavoidable, Cris. Look, it won’t be long. There and back in three Ordevian days.” Sixty-six hours. Surely that was enough for Sokara. Would pay back her debt.
“Okay. Well, we’ll keep trying to get past this blackout. I’ll sleep easier knowing we can reach you. How’s the kid doing?”
“Surprisingly well,” she said.
“More power to him,” Rios said. “I’ll be in touch, Raffi. Take care. Stargazer out.”
She slept uneasily that night. Dreams of lost children, separated from their parents, unable to find their way home. In the morning, she and Elnor went to see the ruins.
* * *
Elnor, standing at the place where two rivers met, looking at the rubble of a long-gone town, felt lost and sad. He had come on this trip to Ordeve because he knew that was what Admiral Picard wanted. He was going to the Academy because he knew that was what the admiral wanted. Elnor often did what others wanted. He was starting to believe he did so because it meant he did not have to think about what he wanted.
He looked back over his shoulder. Raffi was walking purposefully through the ruins. She seemed to know exactly what she was looking for. The commander always gave that impression. She stopped, suddenly, looking down at the ground. She knelt and began to clear away some brambles covering the spot.
Elnor dug the toe of his boot into the ground. Rich, black soil. If anyone had asked him—and people rarely did—he thought that the Romulan settlers should be allowed to go into the Caanta valley. This ban—it was ridiculous. Nobody knew for sure what was there. More secrets. Why not find out once and for all? Secrets led nowhere. Find out the truth, and then live with the truth.
“Hello!” a voice called out from behind.
Elnor turned to see a man, a Bajoran, heading his way. But hadn’t the Bajorans left Ordeve years ago? Had some of them gotten left behind? The man, reaching Elnor, greeted him in a friendly manner. “Good morning! And what a splendid morning it is.”
Elnor considered the spring day unfolding around him; the bright blue sky, the new green leaves, the gentle breeze. “Yes,” he said. “It’s beautiful.”
“Well, don’t sound too surprised!” said the man. “Ordeve’s a very beautiful world. My name’s Toze Falus, by the way.”
“I’m Elnor. I’m…” Elnor struggled to think of something to say that was permitted. “I’m Romulan,” he decided.
“I can see that!” said Toze. “Plenty of Romulans around here. Fewer Bajorans these days, of course.”
“I was wondering,” said Elnor, completely truthfully.
“Well,” said Toze, “I’m an archaeologist.”
“Oh,” said Elnor. “So not local.”
“No—”
“Because you all left.”
Toze’s face clouded, ever so slightly. “Not a happy history,” he agreed. “But here. Have a look at what it was like here, once upon a time.” He reached into his pocket. Elnor’s hand tightened on his staff. “You don’t have to be afraid of me,” said Toze. “Or this,” he said, pulling out a small handheld device. “It’s a holo-projector. See? Let me turn it on.”
Suddenly, Elnor was transported into the past. The old Bajoran town sprang up around him. Holo-images, so detailed and rich that he could almost be persuaded they were real. Where the blackened stones and rubble now stood, Elnor could see homes. Little low houses, with red-domed roofs and bright mosaics. The gardens around them, green and thriving. The streets…
“What is a town,” said Toze, “without people?”
Suddenly the streets were full of life. Full of people, living their lives. Bajorans, who had settled here, and who had been forced to leave. Elnor’s straightforward heart went out to them. He knew how that felt. He recalled—distantly—the beautiful world of Inxtis, where he had lived as a small boy. He remembered the grief of departure, and the slow sad realization that he could never go home.
“All conjecture, of course,” said Toze. “We cannot know for sure. We cannot go back in time and be with them. But we can make good guesses. And… there was the temple.”
Elnor looked along the street. There, at the far end, rising up before him, the highest building in the town, was the temple of Akantha. The dome was pale yellow and, with the sun behind it, seemed almost to be alight.
“This is incredible!” said Elnor.
“Isn’t it?” said Toze. “A truly fine example of extrasolar religious architecture. The temple was a long way from Bajor but seems to have been of considerable significance in its day.” He leaned toward Elnor, lowering his voice, as if to tell him a secret. “Speaking confidentially,” he said, tapping his fingers to his lips, “I’m hoping to organize a dig here.”
“Why confidential?” said Elnor, leaning toward him, all the better to hear.
Toze glanced back over his shoulder. “There’s some textual evidence,” he said, in a voice that made him sound like he was giving away state secrets, “that we reached Ordeve by lightship much earlier than is generally believed. I think that a dig here, and perhaps at some other sites in the area, will help me find tangible proof of this hypothesis.
“But I know that others have been sniffing around Ordeve,” he went on. “Deechi Lan at the University of Tamulna, for one.” A fire was kindling in his eyes. “I swear,” he muttered, “if Deechi Lan gets those permits before I do, I’ll kill.”
“The permits?” said Elnor. This conversation, twisting and turning every which way, was bewildering.
“Oh, the Cardassians are dragging their heels about permission to work in the area. You know what they’re like. The nerve! It’s not like Bajorans weren’t living and working in Caanta for generations before they arrived. All I want to do is take a look—”
“We’re traveling out to Caanta,” said Elnor. “Later today.”
“You got permission to go out there?”
“No… not really…”
Toze’s eyes gleamed. “Aha! An illicit journey! Oh, how marvelous! May I come? Do say yes.”
Elnor looked at the man in frank terror. Raffi was going to be very mad at him. “I don’t know whether…” He looked back over his shoulder to where Raffi had stopped her impromptu weeding session, and was now standing again, looking down at the ground. “I mean…”
“Ah,” said Toze, seeing Raffi. “A superior. Come on. Let’s get her permission.” He bounded toward Raffi. Elnor hurried behind.
“Hello!” Toze cried cheerfully, coming up on Raffi’s right-hand side.
“Er… hello?” she said. “Elnor? Who is this?”
Elnor, who had the vaguest sense that they were interrupting something important, said, “I’m sorry to disturb you. This is Toze Falus.”
“I’m a professor at the University of Ashalla,” said Toze. “An archaeologist.”
“Lieutenant Commander Raffi Musiker,” said Raffi, “Starfleet. Can I help you, Professor Toze?”
“I understand from your young friend here,” he said, leaning in, “that you’re intending a trip into the Caanta valley…” He made it sound like they were intending to bury a few bodies at midnight.
Raffi gave Elnor a look best described as murderous. Elnor felt himself wither. “Do you indeed,” Raffi said.
“Please don’t be angry with Elnor,” said Toze. “I did catch him unawares. And I understand the, er…” He ran the tip of his tongue across his lips. “The sensitivities involved in visiting the area. I’ve had a request for permission with the exarch’s office for almost two years now.”
“I’m sorry, it’s out of the question,” said Raffi, turning away. “Elnor, a word.”
“Ah,” said Toze. “I was afraid you might say that. This puts me in rather a difficult position…”
Slowly, Raffi turned to look at him. “Go on,” she said, folding her arms.
“What I mean is… Oh dear, this is very awkward… But… My request to the exarch has involved many delicate negotiations. Supremely delicate negotiations. Should the exarch’s office ever learn that I knew about your intended visit and did nothing to apprise them of the situation, then I’m afraid that my own visit there might be jeopardized and then, well…” He held out his hands. “Deechi Lan,” he concluded, as if this explained everything.
“Deechi Lan?” said Raffi.
“He’s at the University of Tamulna,” said Elnor earnestly, in what he hoped would be a helpful contribution to the conversation.
“You,” said Raffi. “Hush. I’ll talk to you later.” She turned back to Toze. “A competitor, eh?”
“Academia,” said Toze. “Such a bloodthirsty profession.”
“I’m thinking of heading in that direction myself,” she said.
“Do,” he replied. “You’ll have a ball. So can I come?”
“I can’t think of a way to say no,” said Raffi.
Toze clapped his hands together. “Marvelous!” he said. “And, er—when shall we three meet again?”
“Dusk,” said Raffi.
“Oh, dusk, of course!” said Toze. “How thrilling. Until dusk, then, Commander. I shall be here. Depend on it!” And he bounded off, back to wherever he had sprung from.
“What just happened?” said Elnor.
“What happened,” said Raffi, “was that you didn’t keep your mouth shut and he just blackmailed us to come along on our extremely secret trip across the river.” She looked down again at the small slab of stone by her feet. “Dammit!” she said. Again, Elnor had the sense that he had interrupted something important. He opened his mouth to apologize, but Raffi was striding away, hitting her combadge as she did.
“Stargazer,” she said. “Get me everything you can about Toze Falus, professor of archaeology at the University of Ashalla.”
Elnor watched her go. Again, he felt that deep frustration at the concealments that went on around him, the purpose of which he could not see, and the mistakes into which this led him. That frustration turned rapidly into a deep well of sadness: that he would never fit into this world—this life—in which he found himself. Was he always going to be out of place? He looked down at the stone that had, until a few minutes ago, been the focus of Raffi’s attention. There were a few words, in Cardassian letters, etched on it:
AVARAK OF VULCAN
2354–2376
FOR CARDASSIA
He turned to Raffi, to ask, but she was too far away.
* * *
Sokara, confronted with the news that someone was joining them on their journey into the Caanta valley, and hearing the circumstances, said, “This is what happens when you work with the Qowat Milat.”
