Never again no more 5, p.25
Never Again, No More 5, page 25
“Did you get my messages? I’ve called you.”
His nostrils flared. “I got all ten messages,” he said tensely. “And I received every call. Why are you at my house? Don’t you have a combined family to tend to?”
“Look, Aldris. Things between us took a turn for the worse. I’ve gone over and over in my mind how they got so bad. I don’t know where we went wrong, but I do know I don’t want us to hate each other. I was wrong on so many levels for so many things. Regardless of who did what to whom, I just want you to know that I forgive you, and I was hoping that you’d forgive me too. Not just because of the incident with Jessica, but with Mike, too.”
Aldris put his head down. “Is that all?”
“Yes.”
He looked up, his expression like stone. “I appreciate the comments.” He prepared to shut the door.
“Wait! So you’re not going to say anything?”
He shook his head. “No, I’m not. I’ve already said my apologies and done my begging. It wasn’t enough for you, so while I appreciate the comments, I don’t forgive you. I know I’m not perfect, and I don’t pretend that anybody else is either, but there are some things that just aren’t fixable. I’ve learned that lesson from you. I accepted it and moved on. I think it’s time you did the same thing too.” With that, he shut the door in my face and to any type of friendship or relationship we ever had.
Wow. I slowly walked away from his house. Our house. The flower I planted in the garden was still growing and blooming. I walked over to it and admired it. As I looked at it, tears began to fall from my face. Unlike this plant, our relationship had not stood the test of time, and it was both of our faults. I cried because the plant symbolized something I’d probably never have—a never-ending love.
As I got into my car, the car Aldris bought for me, I continued to cry. Everything around me was a reminder of my life with Aldris, from the way I wanted Mike to act even down to the new-car fragrance in my car. With all the ill shit that had happened between us, why could I now only remember the happy times with Aldris?
“Hello?” I answered my cell phone, trying to straighten my voice.
“Hey. Is everything okay?” Mike asked.
I cleared my throat. “Yeah. Everything is cool.”
“I was just checking on you and the kids.”
“We’re fine.”
“Nobody is giving you any problems, right?”
“No. We’re fine.”
“Are you sure you’re all right?”
“Yep.”
“Still mad at me?”
“No.”
He sighed. “Okay. Well, I guess I better get back to work. I was just checking in. I love you, baby.”
I exhaled as I rubbed my forehead. “Okay. I’ll talk with you later. I love you too, Aldris,” I said and hung up the phone.
Oh, shit! Did I really just say that? I thought as I finally cranked up my car to leave our house—I mean, Aldris’s house. The immediate ring of my phone from Mike told me that I absolutely did. I hit the RINGER OFF button.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
Chapter 35
Lincoln
“Close your eyes. I have a surprise for you,” Mona purred.
“What kind of surprise?” I asked, closing my eyes.
“The kind that you won’t get to see if your eyes aren’t closed,” she teased as I heard her walking into the room.
“My eyes are shut. I promise.”
“Okay. Open up,” Mona ordered.
I opened my eyes and gasped. “Shiiit. Lawd have mercy.” I rubbed my hands together.
The sight before me left me horny and speechless. She wore a halter bra and matching thong that were in my team’s colors with my number on each cup of the bra and the front of the thong. Red stilettos adorned her feet. Damn, she was gorgeous.
She tossed her hair. “What do you think?” she asked as she modeled the ensemble for me.
I stood up and walked to her. “I love the sentiment, and I think you are sexy as hell. I can’t wait to get this off of you.” I bent down and kissed her neck.
She giggled and wrapped her arms around my neck. “Your kisses are amazing. I love our time together.”
“You do?”
She nodded. “Uh-huh.”
“I do too,” I confirmed as I sat in the chair, and she straddled me.
Her soft hands caressed my face. “Sometimes I have to pinch myself because I still can’t believe this is real. My boyfriend is Lincoln Harper.”
“Well, believe it, baby,” I murmured as we shared a passionate kiss.
Yes, Mona was officially my lady. It’d been three weeks since we first met, and we’d been nonstop ever since. For our three o’clock date, I’d planned a nice, private picnic for the two of us. We ate and talked, and talked, and talked. It felt like I was reconnecting with an old friend versus getting to know someone I’d just met. We had the strangest connection to each other. We could pick up on each other’s thoughts, finish each other’s sentences, and the attraction both mentally and physically was through the roof.
Surprisingly, we still stuck to our core values. I wasn’t comfortable bringing her to my house because of my daughters, and she refused to let me know where she lived. A plus. I liked that she didn’t just go against all her values because I was the great Lincoln Harper. I appreciated the instances of reservation that she had with me. It was refreshing because it showed me that my status wasn’t what she was after nor was it what she cared about. So we ended up staying at a hotel. The sex was safe and great. I brought my own condoms, and she insisted that I use them. No, she wasn’t better than Charice in the bedroom, but that was only because Charice knew me well enough to know exactly what I liked and how I liked it. Mona would get there, and I was happy enough with her to patiently wait for her.
We’d seen each other nearly every day despite our schedules, even if it was only for fifteen minutes. She was the first person I spoke to every morning and the last person I spoke with at night. She’d flown out to meet me for our first preseason away game, and we were in her hotel room spending some quality time together when she showed me her custom-made lingerie.
I know what you’re wondering. Charice, Charice, Charice. Outside of visiting my daughter once, I hadn’t spoken to her. That wasn’t because she hadn’t tried, but because I was done with that situation. She’d called me once to tell me that I was overreacting and that she really was working to get things resolved. Yada yada yada. Same shit. Different day. You’d think she would’ve picked up on the hint that I was done with her, or better yet, figured out that I had someone new in my life, but that would require her to care enough about me to find out what was really going on in my life. As you can see, three weeks and one girlfriend later, she still had no clue. But she loved me, right? Exactly.
The only thing that bothered me about having to deal with Charice was the fact that I couldn’t talk about Lexi to Mona without revealing who her mother was. She asked, and I just kept telling her it was a long story and that I needed to know where this relationship would go before I revealed all the details behind my baby daughter. She understood and never pressed. She just wanted to confirm that I was not with her mother, which I could wholeheartedly assure her of. Once she heard that, she was straight. We were straight.
As we kissed, Mona’s work cell went off. She pulled back from our kiss. “I’m sorry, baby. I have to get this,” she said getting up.
“No problem.”
“Brent, this better be an emergency,” she said to her assistant. “What do you mean he’s recanting his statement? Shit! His mama got to him again. Look, have Leslie go through the other evidence. Make sure that it still sticks. Get the reports back on the car immediately, and contact Judge Patterson to subpoena him. I’ll be back tomorrow to tie up any loose ends. I’m having a blast, or I was. I will. You too. Bye.” She hung up the phone and turned to me. “Sorry,” she threw out, looking and sounding aggravated.
“Problems with a case, I take it.” I walked over to the bed and began massaging her shoulders.
“Yes. It’s taken me three months to build this case. I need that testimony.” She huffed. “God, this feels so good. Brent told me not to worry, to have fun, and to tell you he said hello.” She leaned against my chest as I continued to massage her.
“Tell him I said hello too, and he’s right, you know? You don’t need to worry, because it will all work out. You’ll make it work.”
“You make even the worst problems seem so small.” She sighed away her anguish.
Sensually, I kissed her neck. “I’m your man. That’s my job.”
She released the most tantalizing moan, and that did it for me. Our passion ignited, and we began to sex each other as if it were going out of style. The way she softly called my name and moaned deeply as I penetrated her made me feel like a damn king. The way she gave herself to me during lovemaking was so pure, virginal almost. She was like an angel. I could see myself falling for Mona.
“Lincoln, baby, don’t stop. No one has made me feel so good,” she moaned, breaking into my thoughts as we hit our climax.
As we lay there basking in the afterglow of our lovemaking, I had to address what she’d confessed moments ago. “I’m happy that I’m the only one who’s made you feel this way. It makes me feel as though I’m all you need.”
She turned to face me, snuggling close and running her hand across my face. “Lincoln, thank you for being patient with me,” she whispered.
“What do you mean?”
“I know that you’re probably used to all kinds of spectacular sexual antics.”
“I’d rather have what I have with you and know it’s real than be with a ho who can make my head spin around. Trust me. I’m satisfied. Don’t worry.”
She rubbed my chest. “What makes you so different? You can have your pick of any woman, beautiful and experienced, yet you’re so down-to-earth and willing to be committed. Don’t you want to ‘sow your royal oats’?”
“That is one James Earl Jones line I wish would die.” We both howled in laughter. “No, I don’t. I sowed more than enough oats when I first got into the league. Believe me. This is the good side of my bad boy. Now I want something real. A real relationship with real love.”
“How’d I get so lucky?” she asked aloud, sounding as if it was aimed more toward her than for me.
“I’ve been asking myself that same question every day for the past three weeks.” I kissed her on the top of the forehead. Tilting her chin to look at me, I made a confession. “I went out that night just to have fun and get a bunch of numbers for females who didn’t mean anything, and instead, I met you. I threw away every number I got that night, Mona. I don’t know where this is going, but I want to stay on the ride with you for wherever it will take us. As long as it’s just me and you, I’m all in.”
Tears welled in the corners of her eyes, and I softly wiped them with my thumb. Clearing her throat, she looked away and began to shake her head. “I have a confession to make,” she blurted out.
The moment it flew from her lips, my body tensed up. Oh, dear God. Tell me this woman was not married or in a relationship. Lord knows I can’t take anything worse, like any sexually transmitted diseases. I know we used protection, but still, only abstinence is 100 percent. Maybe there’s a child she doesn’t want me to know about. Damn. Damn. Damn, I thought in a fast flurry.
I sat up and so did she. I swallowed hard as I looked her in the eyes. “What is it?”
She interlocked her fingers with mine. “There is a reason I was hesitant to hang with you that night at the club or give you my number.”
She’s married. Fuck me. “What is that reason?”
“Umm. I’m nervous telling you this because I don’t know how you’re going to take it.”
I pulled my hands free. “Baby, you’re making me a little bit nervous.”
“Listening to you talk about the things you want, you know, a chance at a real relationship—a committed one—is something that I don’t know if I can give you. Well, I mean I could give that to you, but I don’t know.”
I shook my head. “Mona, you’re not making sense to me, baby. Break it down. You just said that you don’t know if you can be in a committed relationship with me, but then you could, so I’m lost. Do you or don’t you want to be with me?”
She sighed and rubbed her forehead. “I’m sorry I’m jumbling this all up. What I’m saying is that right now I am feeling like that is what I want, but the commitment part is what troubles me.”
“I’m not asking you to marry me, Mona.” She nodded as if she agreed and understood what I said. “I’m still confused. Do you want to see other people? Is that your bad girl thing? I mean, if you don’t want to be monogamous, then let me know.”
“No, baby, it’s not that—”
“So what is it?” I cut her off because now I was irritated.
“I haven’t had a boyfriend in four years,” she blurted.
I was a little shocked by that, but, I mean, she had just passed the bar and was trying to get her career off the ground, so it was understandable. Maybe she just had cut buddies because at the time she didn’t have the time to pursue a real relationship. That had to be it. She was scared to tell me that the last four years had been nothing but sex for her. Most women hated to admit that because of the double standard. However, I wasn’t going to be judgmental of that. I’d done the same because of my career.
“We’ve all gone through that phase. You had cut buddies. I get it. Your career came first, and rather than be committed, you just got what you needed. Baby, I’m in the NFL. That’s damn near a lifestyle for a lot of athletes.” I chuckled, looking at her.
She looked at me seriously. “Well, unless a lot of athletes’ cut buddies are gay men, then you can’t compare them to me.”
“Huh?” I scratched my head. “You dated gay men?”
“No. When I turned twenty-three, I had a thing with my friend, Kita.” I looked at her, still confused, and she exhaled and continued. “What I’m saying is I became a lesbian after my experience with Kita, and up until I met you, I had not been with a man.”
I was completely taken off guard. “So you mean to tell me you weren’t interested in me that night at the VIP?”
“Yes, I was. That’s why I stayed. I was shocked because you were the first man to interest me in four years. When you called me that night, it was my first time being turned on by a man in four years.”
My thoughts floated back to that night. No wonder she was strictly about getting the autograph, and then there was Diamond’s comment about her being shocked for more reasons than one that Mona had given me her number. It made perfect sense now. She liked women.
“How come you didn’t tell me this before?” No lie, I was a little upset.
She shrugged. “Did it really matter? I was single when I met you. Cynthia and I had broken up four months before.” She fanned off the thought. “She was worse than a man. Wanted every skirt that smelled sweet to her, and I got tired of that,” she explained, immediately going into the story of Cynthia and her as if I knew all along she had been a lesbian.
She had to back the hell up. The last relationship I knew of was with a man named Matthew. Where in the hell did he fit into all of this? “But what about Matthew? Your ex-boyfriend?”
She held my hands as she settled down to give me her full explanation. “He is my ex-boyfriend. The one who broke my heart by getting Brittany, one of my so-called friends, pregnant. That happened when I was twenty-two. I thought he’d be my husband, but he got her pregnant, and to add insult to injury, he gave her the life that I spent two years building. During that time, Kita was my backbone. I knew she was gay, and it’d never bothered me before. I never knew I was actually her type until I had a moment of weakness and she inducted me into my first lesbian experience.
“At first I was pissed and ashamed. I have very strong Christian values, even though I break a few rules, but being with a woman was never on my menu. It’s kinda like the first time you ever tasted a chocolate bar. Once you’ve had a good experience with that first taste, you crave it again. So I started a two-month secret affair with Kita. She wanted me to come out. I didn’t. We split on good terms, but she wanted someone who could embrace being a lesbian just as she had. Then I found out Matthew married Brittany. That did it for me. I turned my back on men and lived my life as a proud lesbian woman. I sowed my ‘royal oats’ with a few women until I met Cynthia. She was my longest relationship. She was a young attorney like me, and we just clicked. One year and three affairs later, I was done with her and her promises to stop being unfaithful. I remained single to get back in tune with myself, and then I met you in the VIP.”
I didn’t know what to say to that. Part of me was intrigued. What man didn’t fantasize about a threesome with his lady and another woman? Shit, that was like the ultimate sexual fantasy for every heterosexual male in America. Yet the other part of me, the part that wanted to settle down with a normal life, was pissed.
“Wow.” I stood up and walked into the bathroom.
She followed me. “You’re pissed,” she commented more as a question as she crossed her arms.
I peeled off my used condom and flushed it down the toilet. “Yes and no. I mean, how could you not tell me something like that?”
She threw her hands up. “I’m positive there’s some shit I don’t know about you, Lincoln.”
“Well, I can guarantee you it won’t be hearing me tell you, after sex no less, that I used to booty bump another man.”
“That is so hateful and judgmental, which is exactly why I was cautious with telling you,” she said defensively.
“I’m not hating on anybody. If that’s what you’re into, by all means, live your life. You have to take account for it, not me. What I’m pissed about is the fact that you didn’t tell me. Come on, Mona. Don’t you think that is some pretty pertinent information? While you were telling me about NYU and FAMU, you could’ve said, ‘Hey, by the way, I’m gay.’”
