When in doubt, p.17
When in Doubt, page 17
Jeri glanced at her through wide, bloodshot eyes. “Black…and…white units. Four-legged…pandas. Put a blue light…on them and…” Her gasps came more slowly. “Call them police dogs.”
“That’s good, Jeri.” Simone stretched over the sink, pulled a paper towel from the holder, and ran cold water over it. “Is it okay if I cool you off with this?”
Jeri nodded again.
Simone wiped Jeri’s forehead with the wet towel, folded her shirt open wider, and patted her naked chest. “How does that feel?”
“Good. Really good.”
Jeri’s pupils constricted, and her carotid pulse slowed as she recovered from the fugue state. Simone breathed a sigh of relief and momentarily shifted from psychologist to a woman with feelings. “You’re back with me.”
“Sorry I freaked out.” Jeri sat up straighter. “Was I rude to your friends? I felt, I don’t know, like I was smothering around them. And then I went into a full-on flashback.” She looked down at her clothes. “Were you trying to take advantage of me, Doctor?”
Joking was good. “Your friend Tom beat me to it.” Simone stood and took Jeri’s hands to help her up.
“Tom?” Jeri looked on the verge of panic again. “What? Were we—?”
“Calm down. She was trying to help when I got here. I gave her guard duty.” She nodded toward the door. “If you’re up to it, we should probably get you home.”
“I parked in back and walked to the meeting.” Jeri captured Simone’s hand as she turned to leave. “Thank you for helping me. I’m sorry if I caused problems with your friends.”
The look in Jeri’s eyes was pleading, hypnotic. Simone wanted to comfort her, and so much more, but another time, in another place. How often had she said those words recently? Would she and Jeri ever have a right time? “My friends will understand, or they won’t.”
“Simone, I remembered. Almost everything. I think,” Jeri said. “Would you help me with the rest, while it’s still fresh?”
Her first instinct was to say yes, but she shouldn’t. “Wouldn’t you prefer to call Cleaves?”
“I think I should stay with the memories, but if it’s a conflict for you, don’t worry. I’ll do the best I can tonight and call him tomorrow.”
The desperation in Jeri’s voice cut through Simone’s final professional and personal reservations. “Of course, I’ll help you.”
“I shouldn’t put you in this position. You’ve been so good with boundaries. Are you sure?”
Simone kissed Jeri’s cheek and met her gaze. “There’s no way I’m turning my back on you right now. You’re at a critical point remembering the shooting. Where should we go?”
“Would my house be okay? I’d like to be in a familiar place.”
“Perfect.” Simone led a very wobbly Jeri through the bar and out the back exit to Jeri’s car. As they pulled away, Simone saw Tom and a sexy butch entwined against the side of an old model Continental. How had she and Jeri met? Was this how they connected? She really didn’t want to know the details.
Jeri opened the front door of her house and waved Simone in. “Excuse the mess. I wasn’t expecting company.”
The house was immaculate, no dirty clothes on the floor, no leftover containers littering the countertops, and no stack of liquor or beer bottles. “Looks good to me.”
Jeri flopped onto the sofa and sighed. “Would you mind getting me a glass of ice water? I feel like I’ve run a marathon.” She pointed to a cabinet beside the refrigerator. “Glasses. And there’s Bushmills in the cupboard if you want.”
Simone fixed two glasses of water while keeping an eye on Jeri. She was still pale and trembling. In some cases, unearthing lost memories could be as traumatic as the original event. “It’s natural to feel tired.” She handed Jeri her drink and sat down beside her. “Your brain has just had a pretty intensive workout.” She sipped her water and waited, unwilling to push.
Jeri sat quietly drinking and staring at the fireplace until her trembling eased and her face again flushed with color. “I’m certain Vanoy charged me with a knife. The woman threw a flashbang, an explosive device, at my feet that temporarily deafened and blinded me. I can see their faces now. The woman yelled that he had a knife, but based on how I’ve been questioned, I assume the officers didn’t find it.”
“What could’ve happened to it?”
“In all the excitement, it would’ve been easy for the woman to take it and dive out the window. None of my assists saw her when they arrived. I don’t know why she’d take the knife.”
“And who were your assists?”
“The whole squad was there when I woke up. Carl and Randy were closest.”
Simone shivered as she recalled the uneasy feeling with Randy at the coffee shop and his whispered words. She’d wanted to tell Jeri her suspicions tonight but thought sharing about Kay would reestablish their trust first. And then, Jeri had her flashback. “Anything else?”
Jeri drained her glass and looked at Simone. “This is going to sound crazy, but I’m not sure I shot the guy. It doesn’t feel right. There’s a missing piece.”
Simone edged closer. “What do you mean?”
“I heard the gunshot, but it felt distant, not mine, if that makes sense. And the timing is mixed up with passing out. Why can’t I remember that part?”
Simone pulled Jeri against her shoulder. “Don’t worry about it right now. You’re three-quarters of the way there. I call that progress. The rest will come. Try to relax.”
“Will you be here?”
Simone felt Jeri’s body tense against hers. Was Jeri afraid she’d push her away like she had after their brief kiss? If so, she needn’t worry. Simone was too invested, too much in love to ever reject her again. In love? “I’ll be right here.”
Jeri sighed heavily and wrapped her arm around Simone’s waist. “Thank you. And I’m sorry for being such a basket case lately. I’m usually a pretty stable and reliable person, even fun. I can provide character references.”
Simone chuckled at Jeri’s rare lightheartedness. “Can you?”
“My best friend, Vita Nix, has known me for twenty-five years.” Jeri paused. “Well, maybe not Vita. She knows where all the bodies are buried. My neighbor, Mrs. Doyle, thinks I walk on water. You’d like her. She’s very Irish.”
“I’m sure I would.” Without thinking, Simone kissed the top of Jeri’s head and inhaled the outdoorsy fragrance of her shampoo. God, how she’d love to be in a cabin in the woods by a lake with the Jeri she’d met weeks ago—open, energetic, confident, and free of haunting memories and pending investigations. If only.
“Simone?”
“Uh-huh.”
Jeri pulled away and made eye contact. “I’m sorry again about what happened after our kiss. That’s not really me.”
“Shush. I believe you. Rest.”
Simone felt Jeri’s body go slack against hers and hugged her tighter. “I’ve got you.” But who would catch Simone if the angry Jeri returned and preferred the excitement of casual encounters to the challenge of a relationship? Or would she return? Maybe her memories would bring Jeri back to her life before the shooting.
She listened to Jeri’s steady breathing and relaxed into the rhythmic rise and fall of her chest. It felt good, right, to comfort the one she loved. There was that word again. She rolled it around in her mind. Yes, she was in love with Jeri Wylder. Their talk tonight had been open and intimate, but how would Jeri feel when Simone revealed her suspicions about Randy? She tightened her arms around Jeri. Time to think about that later. She wanted to enjoy this moment as if it would be their last.
Chapter Twenty-two
Jeri woke alone mid-afternoon covered in a blanket on her sofa. She’d run the gamut of emotions yesterday—relief at remembering most of the shooting, fear about the still missing bits, and intimacy and comfort in Simone’s arms while she slept. During the night, she’d cried, Simone whispered soothingly, and the nightmares hadn’t come.
Why did she leave without a word? Simone had shared a painful part of her past that brought them closer, but then they’d gotten sidetracked by Charlotte and Erica, and Jeri’s flashback. She reached for her phone and saw Simone’s text.
You looked so peaceful I couldn’t wake you. Speak later?
Jeri’s pulse quickened followed by a flush of heat. She wanted Simone—wanted to know her better, spend hours talking, learn about her childhood, all her past loves, and gradually hold and explore her body endlessly. Her feelings for Simone rang true with a certainty missing from the rest of her life since the shooting. Time to face facts. She was in love with Simone. No question. No doubt. She started to text back, but her phone rang. “Hello.”
“Officer Wylder, this is Barbara in the criminal investigations division. Can you come down to the station to look at a lineup in an hour?”
“Is it about my case?” Detective Bowen in CID was handling the criminal part of the shooting, but she wasn’t scheduled for another follow-up interview for two more days. Maybe they’d caught a break. Maybe someone was actually working her case even though she’d seen no evidence of it recently.
“I can’t say. I was just told to notify you.”
“On my way. Thanks.” Jeri dressed and walked slowly to headquarters, replaying the recovered memories from last night and hoping the actual shooting would surface. No luck.
Detective Bowen met her in the reception area of CID. “Follow me, Wylder.”
She buried her hands in her jacket pockets and followed, willing her jangling nerves to calm. “Can you tell me what this is about?”
He didn’t respond until they entered a small viewing room with a two-way mirror and closed the door. “We located someone who might be connected to your case but need you to verify.”
“Who is it?” Only one person, other than police, had relevant information about the shooting, unless another witness had come forward. “Never mind. Let’s do this.”
“You know the drill. Look at all the subjects carefully, but don’t make any comment until I ask the question,” Bowen said. “Are you ready?”
She blanked her expression, took a deep breath, and nodded.
Bowen tapped on the mirror, and lights came on in the adjoining room. Six women stood in front of the viewing window. Instead of looking for someone familiar, Jeri started on her right and worked her way down the line, studying faces, hair, build, and posture. She stopped at number three. Melony Wright. Jeri closed her eyes and reviewed the events of that night, confirming that she wasn’t confusing her memory with the mug shot she’d recently seen. Definitely the same woman, just less wasted today. She opened her eyes, certain this was the woman she’d been searching for. She continued to the end of the line.
Bowen waited until Jeri looked at him again. “Do you recognize anyone, Wylder? If so, tell me how you recognize her.”
“Number three. She was the woman in the room with Calvin Vanoy on Morehead Avenue the night he was shot.”
“You’re sure?”
The tight bundle of nerves at the base of her neck loosened, and her shoulders relaxed. “Absolutely. Who is she?” Jeri needed Bowen to say it, to confirm what she already knew.
“Melony Wright, Mel on the street. I wanted a positive ID before questioning her. I’ll take it from here. Thanks for coming down.” Bowen opened the door, but Jeri didn’t move.
“Would you mind closing that again, please.”
Bowen looked at her skeptically and did as she asked. “Yeah?”
“First, I want to thank you for not giving up on my case. I’m really grateful.”
“It’s my job and I take it seriously. Let’s hope the girl supports your version of events.”
“Yeah.” Jeri hesitated for a second and then plowed ahead. “I have a favor to ask.” If she told him about her dream or her gut feeling, he’d think she was nuts, but she questioned if she’d really shot Vanoy. The CSI had tested her hands for gunshot residue but wouldn’t tell her the results. “I’d like to see the weapon.”
“You mean your weapon, don’t you?” He shook his head. “You want to help, I get that, but let us do our jobs. The weapon in evidence is the one you were issued the day you graduated from recruit school. So, please don’t bring up a ghost gun at this point. It’ll make you look desperate…and guilty.”
“Please, Bowen. You’re under pressure to clear this case, but it’s my life and career on the line. If I could just look at the weapon you have in evidence. I have a hunch.” It sounded better than I’ve had a dream. “I don’t even need to touch it.”
His expression changed from surprise to disbelief and finally a look of compassion softened the lines around his mouth and eyes. “I don’t know what you hope to gain, but fine. One quick look. And you better not tell anyone I did this. Got it?”
“Agreed.” She followed him to the evidence room where he secured her weapon from the clerk and held it out to her. “Would you turn it so I can look down the barrel?”
He shifted the Glock inside the plastic bag until the end of the barrel was visible.
Jeri felt like she’d been gut punched. How could this happen? What happened? She formed her next words carefully. “Something’s wrong. My gun has a tiny nick on the end of the barrel. I dropped it on the sidewalk during requalification.” Her heart pounded so loudly she could barely hear.
“That can’t be. The serial numbers match. It’s your gun.”
“Did you run ballistics?”
Bowen looked everywhere but at her. “The request is in, but the lab is really behind right now.” He gave her a sheepish look. “Sort of thought there was no rush. We ass—”
“You assumed the entire gun was mine since the serial numbers matched. Well, I’m thinking you should put a rush on those tests now. Every cop knows Glock barrels are interchangeable.” She stared at him until he finally got it.
“Shit, what a rookie mistake. And I call myself a detective.” He handed the gun back to the evidence tech and nodded for her to follow him outside to the parking lot. “I think you need to know something else.” He checked the area to make sure they were alone. “Your body camera wasn’t recovered at the scene. We have no idea where it is. And as you know, the camera footage has to be uploaded to the server before we have access.”
“What?” Jeri felt like the world was closing in around her. “What about Randy’s and Carl’s cameras?”
“Randy’s wasn’t functioning because his battery ran down after six hours of off-duty work before his shift. And Carl never turned his on. The other officers arrived later.”
“How convenient,” she murmured. Cops were her friends, coworkers, and family, but she had a sick feeling that was about to change. Her squad and a dead man were the only people in the room when she woke up. Whatever happened while she was out, one or all of her guys knew the whole story. “I’ve been asking internal affairs to show me the footage for weeks to help with recall, and they never said a word. I thought it was because I’m not allowed to see it until the active investigation is over. What the hell is going on, Bowen?”
He shook his head. “I have no idea, but I’m damn sure going to find out. Nobody fucks with my investigation.”
She nodded. “Then you’ll have a lab tech check ballistics and then break the weapon down and dust the barrel for prints ASAP? I clean my gun before every shift. If that’s mine, my fingerprints will be all over it. If not—”
“Some lowlife, bent cop framed you for the shooting. Because…” He stopped as if realizing he was about to say something he shouldn’t.
“Because,” Jeri finished for him, “my hand tested positive for GSR.”
He nodded. “And gunshot residue can be transferred.”
Chapter Twenty-three
Simone was almost home from work before she sent the text she’d rewritten a dozen times during the day. Can I see you tonight? Jeri had inhabited her mind all day—their exploration of Jeri’s memories, sleeping on the sofa, and comforting her—the kind of intimacy that transcended sex. A couple of clients had commented on her distraction. Her usual pinpoint focus vanished when thoughts of Jeri popped up frequently, suddenly, and always with a jolt of emotion.
Jeri’s reply came quickly. Can’t wait.
Simone took a quick shower, changed into leggings and a bulky sweatshirt, and paced. Would her bad news dampen Jeri’s upbeat mood? Simone didn’t want to cause Jeri more trouble, but if her fears proved true, trouble and another rift were guaranteed. Her insides were such a tangle of nerves that she jumped when Jeri knocked. She opened the door, and Jeri’s face read like a woman not at all happy.
“What’s wrong?”
Jeri smiled but the attempt resembled a grimace. She gave Simone a hug that ended much too quickly and stepped back. “First, thank you for last night, for telling me about Kay, and especially for helping me through some scary stuff. I’m not sure what I would’ve done without you.”
She took Jeri’s hand, urged her inside, and closed the door. “Oh, I think Tom had things under control.” She tensed at the memory of Tom’s hands on Jeri when she walked into the restroom—not a scene she wished to experience again. She moved toward the sofa, unsure if she wanted to distance from Jeri or the memory. Without thinking, she blurted, “She’s the woman you had, what did you call it, rough play with?”
Jeri glanced sheepishly around the condo before nodding. “About that.”
“I don’t need details. You said she helped you and that’s good enough for me. I just sensed a connection when I saw you together. I’d rather hear what’s going on today.”
Jeri captured her hands and made her look at her. “But I want you to understand. Tom and I shared a bond we both needed at the time to get through our traumas. She told me about her family in Kentucky, and I talked about Vita and her Boston terriers mostly. Sex with a stranger isn’t the best coping mechanism, but it worked for us. Sort of.”
“I’m glad you had someone.” But hearing Jeri talk about a bond with the sexy Tom made Simone almost squeamish. She tried to pull away, but Jeri held firm.
