Doc, p.6
Doc, page 6
She nudges me, “You know it’s delicious.”
The fights start and the rowdy room, suddenly quiets. Everyone is glued to the television, staring as two grown men literally try to pound each other into the cage. Loretta leans into me, explaining the rules and some of the points. At first, I’m a little on edge watching the fight. Then, I relax, knowing that I’m safe in this room. Loretta found us a spot in the back. I sip my beer and look around the room. After the fight is over, people come and go. Only Chris and Dave stay. There’s a lot of trash talking about everyone’s favorite fighters. There’s a lot of laughing too. I just sit enjoying being a part of the conversation. It’s a lot like the club, but also a little different.
It isn’t until I’m laying in bed that night, that I realize I’m still smiling. I haven’t been this happy in a long time, not that I’m unhappy usually. I love the club. I love the club family. I want my own family though, kids and white picket fences. I’ve never met a girl I could picture being with for the rest of my life. I think for a minute about that house with a picket fence and I can see Loretta pushing my babies on a swing.
I guess it’s time for me to take things to the next level.
Chapter 11: Loretta
I smile and wave as the last of the students finally leave. My shoulders slump as the tiredness settles in my brain. While I’m working and around everyone, I feel energized. I feed off of their excitement, but every night when I’m alone, I remember how long and hard I’ve worked all day. I gather up my bags: gym bag, lunch bag, laptop bag, slinging everything over my shoulder. Flipping the keys around my finger, I make my way to the door.
As I’m locking up, I hear the now familiar voice ask, “Want a hand?”
I gaze into the blue eyes of Doc and smile. I ask, “What are you still doing here?”
He shrugs, “Saw that Chris left early. I didn’t think it was safe for you to be out this late at night by yourself.”
“You know I can take care of myself.”
“Yeah,” he rumbles, stepping closer.
I bite my lip and say, “Well, I better head home.”
His hand slips under one the straps of my bag. “Where is your car parked?” he asks as he attempts to take my bag.
“I walked,” I admit.
He freezes. “Loretta, it’s well past dark. You shouldn’t walk home this late at night.”
“It’s a nice night. I live a mile from here. Plus, I can take care of myself,” I point out.
He grumbles something under his breath. Louder he says, “I’ll give you a ride home.”
I glance over at the motorcycle parked nearby. “That isn’t necessary,” I sputter, even though I want to jump up and down for joy. I finally have a chance to feel that rumble underneath me.
His hand closes around the straps of my bags and they fall off my shoulder. He walks over to the bike and starts pushing my bag into one of the saddlebags. He grabs my lunchbox and puts it in the opposite compartment. He steps over the bike and settles onto the thick leather seat. In one fluid motion, he kicks the beast to life. I take his outstretched hand and ease myself behind him.
He chuckles as he says, “You are going to want to hold on.”
I place my hands on his sides. I can feel his laugh as he twists the throttle. We are propelled forward. I slide my arms all the way around him, pressing my chest into his back. Over his shoulder, I call out directions. The mile ride isn’t long enough. I wish I could stay pressed against him for so much longer. He grins at me when we pull up in front of my apartment.
“How did you like your first ride on my bike?”
“I loved it,” I gush.
“Would you like to go drop your bags off and then I will take you for a real ride?”
I nod enthusiastically. Together we walk up the three flights of stairs to my apartment. I basically just throw my bags inside the door before locking up and following him back down the stairs.
This time he hands me a helmet. “Gotta wear the brain bucket for anything over a mile.”
I slide the helmet on and fiddle with the strap. He reaches over and clasps it for me, his rough fingers brushing against my face. “There you go,” he murmurs.
This time when I slide behind him, I wrap my arms tightly around his waist. We ride until we are out at the backroads. Then he twists the throttle a little harder propelling us forward faster. I stretch an arm out and let my fingers play in the wind. Sitting behind him, the wind billowing around me, my heart feels lighter. The weight and worries of everyday life disappear. For the first time I experience true freedom. I could ride behind Doc all night. Eventually, Doc turns and I realize we are on the way back to my apartment. Almost instantly, the worries of tomorrow fill the pit of my stomach. I don’t want the night to come to an end, but it must. I have workout in the morning. I shouldn’t have stayed out as long as I did tonight. Dave’s going to notice and is definitely going to yell at me about my lack of sleep. The time with Doc was worth the tongue lashing I’m going to get.
Doc idles in front of my apartment complex. I use his shoulder to help dismount, sliding out from behind Doc with reluctance. Before he can move from his bike, I throw my arms around him, hugging him tightly. “Thank you, thank you!” I tell him, so I don’t plead with him to take me back out on the roads.
His arm wraps around me. “Anytime,” he whispers.
I pull away, but his arm stays on my waist, preventing me from pulling too far away. Our faces are close. Kissing close. I lean into him, drawn by the passion darkening his eyes. It is all the signal he needs, and he hauls me back to him. I stumble into his form, still straddling the bike. His lips press against mine roughly. My hair is pulled by his strong hands, tilting my face further up into his. I gasp and he uses the opportunity to dive into my mouth. His tongue tracing along mine before exploring further. I hold onto him as tightly as I did during the motorcycle ride. I need his strong body as an anchor in the passionate waves.
He breaks the kiss suddenly, pressing his forehead against mine. We huff as if we just finished training. I don’t think I’ve been so out of breath in a very long time. My heart is beating hard. He presses a kiss against my temple and whispers, “Go upstairs, Loretta.”
I pull away slowly. He uses my hesitation to press another soft kiss against my neck. “Go,” he urges quietly.
Stepping away from him I turn toward the stairs. When I reach the first step I turn around. He is still sitting on his bike, a huge smile splitting his face, as he watches me walk away. My stomach flops and I want to run back to him. I don’t want the night to end and I’m a little afraid I’ll wake up tomorrow morning and this will only be a dream. He nods his head towards the stairs reminding me what I am supposed to be doing. His thighs flex as if he is fighting to stay put on his bike. I turn and race up the stairs. Flinging my door open, I fly to the window in time to see him drive away.
It isn’t until I lay my head on my pillow that I realize; I kissed a student.
I work out with Dave in the morning, but I can’t stop the flutter in my gut. I dial Chris’s number as I’m leaving the gym. He answers on the second ring.
“Rhett? You okay, you never call me this early.”
“I’m fine,” physically anyway, “but I do need to talk to you.”
“Breakfast?”
“Yeah, half an hour work for you?”
He agrees and then hangs up. We always breakfast at a little diner right down the street from the gym. I hurry home, shower, braid back my wet hair, and then rush out the door. Chris is already waiting at a table when I walk through the door. I slide into the seat across from him. Before he can say anything, I blurt, “I kissed Doc last night.”
The waitress steps up, “Okay, guys, you ready to order?”
“Waffles, for both of us, please,” Chris answers.
“My diet,” I protest weakly.
Chris silences me with a look. The waitress disappears and Chris mutters, “I can’t have this conversation without waffles, Rhett, and I’m not doing it alone.”
I nod and wait while he collects himself. “You know my rule has always been no fraternizing between the staff and students.”
My stomach rolls. I’ve known the rule since I was sixteen years old and first started working for Chris. “Things are a little different now, though.”
I perk up, a spark of hope igniting in my chest.
“Since, I made you part owner and you are working on buying the business you really have to make your own rules. It’s still not a good idea to mix business with personal relationships,” he shrugs, “but I also can’t imagine a better guy for you to meet.”
I nod once, not knowing what to say. Chris sighs, “Have you guys talked about what happens next?”
“No, it happened last night. He drove me home from work.”
“You walked again? I told you not to do that anymore at night.”
I glare at him. “I can take care of myself.”
He rolls his eyes and motions for me to continue.
“Anyway, Doc offered to take me for a ride on his motorcycle, so I went. We drove around for an hour and when he brought me home, we kissed.”
Chris nods as he thinks. He sips his coffee. It’s only a few seconds but it feels like an eternity. I’m waiting on a verdict, sitting on the edge of my seat as if this conversation is life and death. I try to lean back into my chair and relax, but pop back up as soon as Chris speaks, “Well, I say you need to tell him about your beliefs, Rhett. See if he’s still interested. If he is, then great. We will figure out some ground rules for while you guys are at the gym together.”
I’m so happy I want to dance in my seat. The weight I didn’t realize I was carrying on my shoulder’s lifts with Chris’s approval.
“But, Loretta,” his face is hard, like he’s got something distasteful in his mouth. He looks like he would like to do anything but exactly what he is about to say. My heart clenches knowing I’m not going to like whatever he says next. Chris never calls me Loretta unless he is about to tell me something serious.
“You have to be prepared for him to reject you. And you’ll have to keep working together at the gym,” he reminds me.
I sit back in my chair the knot in my stomach knotting again. The worry that has been weighing on me doubles. The waitress sets our food in front of us. As tantalizing as it smells, I don’t think I can eat it, not now. I spent a little while walking on a cloud last night. I felt giddy and tingly. I was so excited about the prospect of a new relationship, until I realized what I had done.
I’ve never been worried about being rejected by a guy before. I love God and I trust that when the right man comes along, I’ll know it. I have faith that God has a plan for my life and I just have to follow along. I’ve never balked at following the rules God laid out for relationships. I’ve always expected that the men I’ve been interested in will either follow the rules or they aren’t the one for me. Either way, I’ll be fine because I’m focused on God and the path he lays out in front of me. I’ve been blessed to be a part of the gym. I’m always thanking him for the things in my life.
For the first time in my life, I’m doubting my decisions. The possibility of being rejected by Doc, has me doubting myself and my beliefs. Everything seems to click with him. It’s easy. I don’t want to ruin our chemistry. Maybe it’s what God has laid out. Maybe it’s not. I won’t know until I talk to him. All I know is, I don’t think I could stand seeing him regularly, knowing that we could never be together. For half a second, I consider the fact that lots of people have sex before marriage. I guess I could be one of those people, too.
The knot in my stomach tightens. I can’t. I know I won’t. I know that if Doc decides my beliefs are too much, I won’t change anything. My heart will just hurt for a while. I’ll keep praising and walking with God.
“Eat,” Chris says through mouthfuls, “Worrying isn’t going to do you any good. You know what you have to do. You won’t know until you talk to him.”
I cut into my waffles, taking a bite. It hits my stomach like a brick. Chris forces lightheartedness into his tone, “I’ve got a great idea for a parent’s night out. I was thinking we could do a nerf war. I’ve still got all the boys nerf guns and have the kids bring theirs. Could be a good time.”
“Sounds like it,” I say.
“I’ll probably hate myself the next morning, I’ll be so sore, but it might be fun.”
I force down another bite and force myself to focus on not thinking about Doc. “Yes, I think so. When would you like to host the nerf night?”
I manage to get my mind off of Doc for the most part, but all day long, thoughts of him keep popping into my subconscious. He’s like an undercurrent throughout my whole day. I dread seeing Doc the next day, but I’m also looking forward to it. It’s twisted, but I just want the doubt to be settled. I’m busy answering questions with a new family when Doc walks through the door. I wave at him and he nods at me. I don’t manage to get free in time to talk to him before class, which means that I spend class trying not to look at him. I’m three rounds in. When I look up from fixing my ponytail, there aren’t any partners left other than Doc. I sigh and wave him over. I focus on rolling and so does he. Neither of us says anything until we are done rolling. He’s tying his belt, looking down at his knees when he offers quietly, “Want a ride home tonight?”
“Can’t,” I shake my head, “I have to do inventory tonight.”
“Okay,” he nods and walks away.
That seems too easy. He just gave in; I expected a little bit of a fight or something. I’m not sure what I was expecting. I expected more than quiet acceptance.
Once everyone is gone, I lock the doors, turn on some music, and get started counting out gis, rash guards, and shorts. It doesn’t take long, normally only an hour or so. Knocking at the door, makes me stand up and shake my head in annoyance. Someone thinks they can just drop by anytime. The locked doors should be a sign that we are closed. I peek out of the storage room, not wanting anyone to see I’m here. It’s Doc at the door. Striding forward, I walk to the front of the gym and let him in. My heart lightens when I see him smiling. I’ve got the opportunity to talk to him now. I won’t spend another sleepless night wondering about the outcomes of this whole mess. I turn the lock on the door as he says, “I brought dinner.”
The smell of food makes my stomach growl. He holds out the bags. When I reach out to take it, Doc leans in and quickly kisses me. It’s a quick peck, like what you would expect to get if you had been dating someone for a long time. It’s sweet in a way. He grins at whatever he sees on my face and leans back in. His lips meet mine for a second time, this time for a slower kiss.
Our second kiss isn’t fevered like the first. Doc slows us down, like we have all the time in the world. The kiss is leisurely, like a stroll in the park. Doc groans as he pulls me toward him. He deepens the kiss and I find myself letting him. Encouraging him. I pull him to me, the bag in my hand sliding down and hitting the floor. Doc threads his fingers through my hair. He tugs it lightly and I open my mouth. My hands grip on to his jacket. With the last of my strength, I start pushing him away. But I think he’s pushing me away, too.
“I have to tell you something,” I inform him. The words come out in a rush, falling out of my mouth too fast. They almost run into one word instead of a sentence.
“We need to talk,” he says at the same time.
I blink at him, thrown off by him wanting to talk to me, “Okay.”
“I decided a long time ago, that if I was going to have a relationship, I was going to do it right. The way God would want it done. So, I need you to know that.”
“I…” his words aren’t computing in my brain. I fumble around with the uniform in my hand. I smooth out the corners.
“I understand if that changes things for you,” he says.
“It doesn’t.”
He stares at me. “I’m serious, Loretta. No sex until marriage.”
I’m blurting, “I decided I wasn’t going to have sex until marriage in high school.”
Doc’s face doesn’t look like he believes me. I pull out a sheet of paper that I wrote down and show him. “Look, this is what I wanted to talk to you about. I was just avoiding you because I didn’t want to this to come to an end.”
He takes the paper and reads down the list. I hurry to continue, “It’s important to me and more importantly it’s important to God. Jeez, that was a lot of importants in one sentence. That doesn’t matter. I just needed you to know before we went any further into anything. Not that one kiss means we are going any further into anything.”
“Loretta,” Doc snaps. Doc leans in and kisses me.
Chapter 12: Doc
Loretta has been fidgeting around and avoiding me all afternoon. I thought maybe I just didn’t know her that well. Maybe she’s giving me the brush off. I’m also not sure how I’m going to talk to her about my beliefs. When I ask her if she wants a ride, she tells me she is going to stay late. So after class, I grab dinner and surprise her. I can’t go home until I’ve told her what I’ve got to say.
Of course, I get distracted. She’s distracting and I’d like to spend a week being distracted by her. I guess that’s why people have honeymoons. It takes everything I’ve got to push her away from me, but I manage it, somehow. Then we are both blurting that we need to say something to the other.
I should let her go first, but I don’t because if I don’t say what I’ve got to say I’m going to burst. Before I know what’s happening, she’s agreeing and showing me a list of things she wanted to tell me. I stare at it and her for a long time. Not believing what God has set in front of me. She is rambling and I can only think of one way to shut her up. I lean in to kiss her. Nothing like our first kiss or even our second for that matter. Short and to the point. All I need is for her to stop rambling.
“You decided this in high school.”
“Yes,” she says, breathless.
