A dancing monkey, p.5
A Dancing Monkey, page 5
My mind wanders off into a daze for a couple seconds.
“Are you there, Melissa? Hello?”
“Oh hey! Yeah, uh. I’d be happy to help. Yeah, yeah. I’ll head right on over. Where are you exactly?” I snap out of my little daydream in time to answer awkwardly.
“Oh, thank you so much! I’m here at the south side of terminal 3 near the baggage claim. I’ll see you soon. And thank you again, Melissa.” Ethan replied with a clear sound of gratitude as he ends the call.
It takes me a minute to collect my thoughts with what just happened. I look down at my phone and stare at Ethan’s number and quickly add it to my contacts. Why the hell did I just daze out like that when Ethan told me who he was? It’s so strange; I feel like I was almost expecting him to contact me.
I quickly hop up from the bed and scramble to dress myself at least halfway decent. Blue jeans and a pink graphic tee. After I jam my toes into the weekend pair of slippers, I rush out the door and into my pearl white coupe.
Most of the drive is busy with rush hour traffic going to and from the airport. Taxi cabs, mini vans, and limousines file in and out of the street. Hordes of business men and women flood the walkways pulling their luggage behind them. Airline personnel are scattered everywhere yelling either at each other or into their radio mics. How the hell am I going to find that guy in this mess of people?
Pulling my car up against a curb, I struggle to get my phone out of my purse. Hopefully I get reception here considering that I’ll be competing with everyone else. I quickly go to my call history and dial up Ethan number and hold the phone up to the side of my head.
“Hello, Melissa?” Ethan's voice is difficult to hear while he’s surrounded by the sound of people talking around him.
“Hey, Ethan! I’m here at baggage claim curbside. I’m in the white two door car, it’s kind of small. Do you see me?” I yell in the phone scanning the crowd on the sidewalk next to me.
After a few seconds, I see Ethan rush out from the herd of people and go around my hood to my passenger door. Ethan is average height with blonde short hair. His light complexion accents his eyes, the deepest blue I’ve ever seen. The black designer suit with a briefcase at his side, makes it obvious that he’s coming in from a business trip.
“Thank you so much!” Ethan says as he quickly gets into the seat next to me.
“Why the heck is it so crowded here?” I ask as I carefully pull into slow congested traffic.
“I think I heard some of them talking about a business venture convention that just ended. This must be everyone trying to leave.” He explains as we slowly pass vans offloading exhibition equipment. I stay silent keeping my eyes fixated on the shuttle bus in front of us.
I try my best not to let the scene of business suits get to me. Everyone in sight has their professional career they’re working on while I’m off screwing around in casual clothing like I’ve never given any care to my future. And I didn’t want to sit here and talk to Ethan about his work either, to be perfectly honest. I’m sure he has a lot to say, but that’s not what I feel like engaging with right now.
I want to open a discussion far from work and business. So like an idiot, I blurt out the first thing that I could think of.
“So, uh. How’s your sex life, bro?”
-Chapter 8-
“Uh. Excuse me? What did you say?” Ethan asks as he turns towards me with a wide-eyed expression.
“Uh, nothing! I’m just a little out of my head since this morning.” I stumble over my words in awkwardness. What the hell kind of question is that to ask? I barely know the guy!This must be the cavalier mood still lingering on my mind, or maybe it’s my loose attitude from driving slightly buzzed from wine.
Oh my God! I’m driving drunk? My paranoia grows like wildfire. I was in such a hurry to help Ethan, Liz, or anyone! I don’t even know anymore, but I know I must be careful driving now. I’m so sorry if I cause us to die, Ethan! Plus now I’ve got to recover this disaster conversation with him.
“Did you just ask if I’m having sex right now?” Ethan asks with his eyes shifting to the side.
My face crinkles up with embarrassment, as I keep my head pointed towards the road to try and avoid any eye contact. “Uh..! I guess I’m more wanting to know what’s been going on with you, romantically. You know, man?” I try to give the impression that I’m totally joking and just wanting a casual conversation.
“Oh. Well I’m not seeing anyone right now, if that’s what you’re asking.” Ethan replies shyly as he looks down at his briefcase. Good, the awkward tension lessens.
I quickly go through all the information I can remember about Ethan. Liz introduced him to me and Demi last year at her birthday party. Her and Ethan have been friends since grade school. “Haven’t you known Liz for a while? Did you two ever hook up? You like her, don’t you?” The questions pass my lips like a reflex. I just keep on firing off questions that pop into my head without thinking. Now I’m just crossing personal lines like a drunk would. Well, I guess that’s pretty accurate for me right now.
“No. No, I guess not. Well it’s not really like that…” Ethan murmurs a bit and stays quiet as he plays with the buckle of his briefcase, which is sitting on his lap.
Good job, Mel. Now I’ve probably opened a whole can of worms with him! This is perfect, I’m stuck in mid-afternoon traffic with someone who needs my help. And all I do is probe him with personal questions.
“You know, Melissa. No one’s ever asked me about Elizabeth. I mean, at least not like you just did.” Ethan finally breaks the silence after a couple minutes of staring down.
“Wait, what? Really?” I question with legitimate concern, hoping he’s not just calling me out on how inappropriate I’m behaving.
“Elizabeth always introduced me to her friends as her childhood buddy. I’m her little pal that any guy who wanted her, shouldn’t ever worry about. I guess I got used to it in high school.” He slowly explains.
“So? How do you feel about her?” There's another probing inquiry coming from my unfiltered mouth.
“She and I have been through almost everything together. I love her like family, for sure. But as time has gone on..." Ethan's voice becomes timid, "Um, well... it seems to go deeper than that. Accepting my position with her is all I can do, right? Honestly, I despise all the trashy men she gives chances to. They’re abusive, controlling, rude, and careless. But a woman like her, with a man like me?" Tension in Ethan's voice starts to grow. "Elizabeth is very outgoing, and she doesn’t seem to want to slow down anytime soon. As for me, I really wouldn’t mind settling down and raising a family some day. I guess we’re just complete opposites, Melissa.”
My hands grip tight to the steering wheel. “I really think you need to stop wasting time, Ethan. You need to tell her right away. Before it’s too late!”
The traffic has come to a dead stop. Drivers around us can be seen losing patience while they check their phones. Others try to look pass the vehicles ahead to see why we’re all stopped.
“But, but… we don’t seem very compatible and…” Ethan sheepishly says.
“So, what if it doesn’t seem? You shouldn’t live your life guessing without trying. Why don’t you just give it a chance? Ethan, maybe it’s time to give Liz a chance to hear how you feel. Then, maybe she will give you a chance.” I snap back at him.
After a moment of timid contemplation, Ethan asks “What if she doesn’t feel the same?”
“That depends on her response. If she needs you to stay as a friend, then you can. But, there’s a chance that you may not be able to handle seeing her afterwards. It will be hard, I’m not going to lie. If you can’t handle being around her as a friend after that, then you need to leave her. But at least you can walk away knowing that you tried, Ethan. It’s one hell of a gamble. Either take the risk and get a solid answer or stay in your safe zone as the childhood buddy.” I explain.
“I see.” Ethan responds with a defeated tone.
“On the other hand, Liz could be waiting for you to make the first move.” I try to lighten his mood with the alternative.
Heavy silence comes between us.
Personally, I’m kind of surprised we made it this far into the topic at all. I’ve never spoken to Ethan like this before. I wonder if anyone’s ever really spoken to him about his emotions like this before. I almost feel like a psychologist, or like a Love Doctor. I stare at the back bumper of the van in front of us eager for an answer or reaction from him.
“I understand what you’re saying, Melissa. Thank you for worrying about me like this. Even though I agree with you, it’s something I’m not entirely ready to risk yet. I’m glad to have had the chance to open up to someone about these things. No one’s ever been this curious about me. But you’re right. I can’t keep waiting and wondering what would or could happen.”
I feel like I’m allowed to breathe again after such a speech from Ethan. Somehow, through all my intrusive rambling and probing, I actually got him to talk to me about it and agree. “So, are you going to tell her how you feel?” I ask timidly.
“Well... I believe I’m ready to consider what can happen. You’ve given me a lot to think about before I’m ready to take that gamble. And eventually, I just might be able to tell Elizabeth how I truly feel about her. This has indeed been eating away at me for quite a while now, and I suppose I’m not getting any younger.” Ethan explains looking up at the traffic in front of us. As he finishes talking, the cars all around us gradually start to move. The flow of traffic becomes more and more free as though Ethan himself permitted it.
I smile as my clammy palms relax on the steering wheel. We continue driving through uptown towards Ethan’s middle-class condo. We spend that time reminiscing about our favorite times we had with Liz.
I stop the car at the curb just outside the main entrance of Ethan’s place. He thanks me again and hurries inside clutching his briefcase wearing an awkward smile on his face.
On my drive home, the excited feeling of Ethan confessing his feelings for Liz slowly turns into wonder. I begin to recount this feeling, but in a negative sense. It quickly takes me back to the entry in Jon’s diary. The one when Jon regrets not confessing to his crush, Jane. It’s a helluva coincidence that Ethan would be in the same boat as Jon. “Only this time, I wasn’t going to stand by and let him make the mistake of not doing anything.” I say to myself feeling the clamminess in my hands returning.
After pulling the car up onto the driveway of my townhouse, I scuffle inside. It’s quiet as I flip off my slippers. Remembering my glass of wine on the nightstand, I quickly make my way back into the bedroom. Both my hands swoop up the glass as I indulge the rest of the dark red wine.
A sudden sound in the distance hits my senses. I nearly choke as my hands twitch violently nearly dropping the glass.
It’s the sound of the doggy door that Cookie uses to go through. It leads into our small backyard where she does her bathroom business. Cookie enters the room and goes right for my ankles to sniff. I slowly put down the glass and tickle her ears. “Hold shit. You scared me just now, girl.” I say to her with a giggle.
Cookie gazes up at me with an endearing look. My expression shifts immediately to a strange realization. “Wait a minute, Cookie, were you trying to scare me?” I whisper dazing down at her eyes. “Jon’s dog died when Jon couldn’t do anything about it. But, I did something about it for you, Cookie… And here you are…alive.”
It’s just like what I’ve done with Ethan and Liz when Jon didn’t do anything about Jane. Right after I read those entries about a sad thing that happens to Jon, something coincidentally happens to someone around me.
First, Jon’s dog dies tragically of a car accident and he blames himself for not keeping his dog in the house. Then, Cookie was seconds away from meeting the tires of that bus, but because I freaked out about someone catching the runaway ball, my dog’s alive.
Second, Jon takes his time with the confession of feelings for Jane and ends up losing her. But in my reality, I see Ethan is a man struggling with his longtime feelings for Liz. My advice for him seems to have given him the needed confidence to finally tell her.
Still, it may cause Ethan to lose her if she doesn’t reciprocate those feelings back. He at least won’t have to live on wondering. Maybe it’s best that Ethan takes his time to decide with Liz, and if it doesn’t work out, at least he’ll know he tried and he’ll have closure.
Oh, come on! It’s not like he has a month until Liz disappears with some popular kid in school like Jane, right? But one thing is clear to me. I’m given the chance to do something about it in both scenarios. Cookie could have been killed by that Metro bus, and I would’ve ended up heartbroken like Jon. Did my talk with Ethan really turn the tides of fate? It’s not like he was going to be hit by any vehicles or anything…
I quickly shake the thought out of my head. My hands must’ve gone into autopilot. I’m sitting on the bed again with the diary open to where I left off, eager to continue into Jon’s life. Maybe I was meant to find this diary.
The next entry starts off:
March 7th:
Dear Diary,
“I’ve finally made a best friend.”
-Chapter 9-
“Ryan was the first friend I made after graduating high school. He taught me how to drive a stick, how to shoot a gun, and how to download music for free. We worked together at the Miller Junction shoe store at the mall.
He moved out here a year ago to pursue his architectural degree in college, while I was doing general studies. After a year of hanging out with him, we decided to move into our own place. Mom and dad had to move again so I decided to be on my own and grow up.
Our apartment was a decent size two bed, two baths, small kitchen, and a balcony. Ryan and I hung out all the time. We’d work on our cars, binge on TV shows, and work together. For almost two years, we were best friends. Until Kathy came along.”
Kathy, huh? I’m seeing a slight trend Jon’s having with women. I really hope he doesn’t fall for his best friend’s girl.
“One afternoon in the shop, we had a customer come into the store. She had a return that I handled. We talked for a little bit. I couldn’t tell right then and there, but I think that she was checking me out. She introduced herself to me. Kathy. I was oblivious to her advances. Eventually she got bored of me and headed out.
Ryan cuts into her way as she’s leaving and starts flirting with her on the spot. He comes up to me after getting her number. He was so excited to finally score a date with someone for once. Normally, I would be happy for him, but there was something about her I did not like.
The next night, I get a text from Ryan saying he was spending the night at Kathy’s place across town. Good for him, I thought.”
Oh, I know where this is going to go: Jon’s best friend is going to shut him out for his new girlfriend. I’ve seen this go down before, it’s a tragedy. “Come on Jon. Don’t let your friendship fizzle out because of some girl.” I whisper.
Over the next several pages in the diary, Ryan’s relationship seems to develop with Kathy. Kathy’s intention seems to be right on point with separating Ryan from Jon. The two best friends slowly grow apart as Kathy embeds herself into Ryan’s head with every passing week. The entries become only a couple sentence updates of when Jon tries to put effort towards Ryan.
April 14th:
Dear Diary,
“Today, I asked Ryan if he wanted to wait with me in line for the new video game, Macabre Fighters 5. But, Kathy wants to see a movie.”
April 30th:
Dear Diary,
“Today, I asked Ryan if he wanted to see the new Monster War movie, but Kathy’s cat is sick and wants him to watch it for her.”
May 7th:
Dear Diary,
“Today, I asked Ryan if he’d help me study for my exam in economics. Nope, he’s helping with Kathy’s final’s project instead.”
The list goes on and on with Jon’s handwriting turning into the jagged texture I’ve seen before when he’s angry.
I really wish Jon would just have a heart-to-heart talk with his best friend, but it seems that Ryan’s always ready to blow him off with a `Kathy’ excuse. I think Jon needs to make it clear that he seriously needs to discuss it with Ryan to get his attention. Or else, just leave him be. I get that Ryan’s happy with his girlfriend, but it’s rude to just shut out friends like that.
Dear Diary,
“It’s been almost two months. Ryan still tries to act normal at work with me in passing, but there’s an emptiness in his attitude towards me.
He only comes home to the apartment to sleep or shower. Before I am even able to get a word in, he’s out the door. The rent money’s always left on the counter, making me feel like I’m just a storage manager for his stuff until he chooses to move out with his queen, Kathy.
I don’t even care anymore. I don’t bother trying to ask how he is or what he’s been up to. I know it’ll be all about her! What can I ever do about it?”
As I reach the end of the entry, I can feel Jon’s sense of defeat radiating from the page. I take another sip of wine. By now, the alcohol’s really hitting me. My head feels heavy along with my own emotions. It’s normal for me to empathize with whomever I’m reading about. Especially if it’s sad, and if there’s alcohol involved.
Before my fingers can turn the page, my phone lights up on the nightstand singing Liz’s ringtone. I quickly push the diary off my lap to my right and answer the call. “Hey, Liz.”
“Hey there, pretty lady! How’s the spa day I prescribed you?”
“Pretty relaxing. I’m just catching up on some reading.”
“Ah okay. Hey, thanks for picking up Ethan for me! I’ve been swamped with paperwork all day.”
“Oh yeah, it was fun. I got to catch up with him a lot.”
