Pippa park crush at firs.., p.12
Pippa Park Crush at First Sight, page 12
Because how was I supposed to tell Mrs. Lee all the ways she had ruined my life right after she had finished pouring her heart out to me?
“Uh, I was just going to ask you about… your… um… er… fantastic taste in lipstick!” I declared. “You always pick the perfect shades. Cherry red, wine mauve. So classy! And I wanted to know what brand you use. So that I can get some. For me. Um, when I’m allowed to wear makeup, that is.”
Even as I said it, I knew it made almost no sense. Mrs. Lee tilted her head to one side and studied me, and I thought she was going to tell me I was talking gibberish. But then she smiled. It was a soft, kind smile, not like her usual molar-baring grin.
“Of course, dear. Now, pay attention, because here’s the best advice I can give you: Sometimes you have to try a lot of things—even things that don’t suit you at all—before you can know what really works for you.”
“Okay,” I said, slightly baffled.
“Good. Let’s find you a color.” Picking up her purse from the coffee table, she rummaged through it, muttering things like “This brand is cheaper but has less staying power” and “But this one might match your undertones more” and “Of course, this one is a Korean brand, and you know we have to support our own.”
Finally, she pulled out a half dozen tubes of lipstick and shoved them into my hands.
“Try them all on!” she encouraged me. “Let’s see which one is truly you.”
I headed to the bathroom and pulled the door closed behind me. Uncapping each of the lipsticks in turn, I fanned them out and held them up to my face. I wasn’t even sure why I was doing it, except that I didn’t want to disappoint Mrs. Lee.
I stared at myself in the mirror, noticing the dark bags underneath my eyes and the paleness of my cheeks. That deep red shade would make me look like a vampire, I thought. Maybe that’s truly me—a wicked bloodsucker.
“You know,” Mrs. Lee called through the door, “my mother never let me wear lipstick at all. But I sneaked a tube in my pocket every time I knew I was going to see Roger.”
The picture of young Mrs. Lee swam up in my mind’s eye again, this time wearing cherry-red lipstick, smiling up at her Korean American boyfriend—who, I noticed with a slight shock, looked a lot like Marvel Moon. At least, in my imagination he did.
My heart lifted a little. Was it the thought of Marvel? Or did Mrs. Lee have some kind of weird cheer-up effect on me?
Setting down the rest of the tubes, I brought “Cherry-Oh Baby” to my lips and began stroking it on. I didn’t do a very good job—I didn’t really know how to put makeup on well—but as the bright color bloomed on my mouth, my spirits rose another notch. I capped the tube and opened the door. “So what do you think?” I asked Mrs. Lee, smiling.
She clasped her hands. “It’s you, Pippa! Absolutely you!”
15 BIANCA
13 Days Until Christmas Eve
(I’m Feeling Superstitious…)
“So it turns out my mom and dad have an ulterior motive for this ski trip,” Starsie announced.
The six of us were at our usual lunch table, and although normally this was one of my favorite parts of the school day, today I kept glancing at the clock, hoping the lunch bell would ring before anyone asked me for details about the party.
“What do you mean?” Win wanted to know.
“Apparently the resort we’re going to is where they met, and they’re planning to renew their wedding vows!” Starsie said. Her eyes sparkled. “It’s kind of goofy, but also super adorable, don’t you think?”
We all oohed and aahed, except Bianca, who was scrolling through her phone and didn’t look up.
Starsie noticed Bianca’s lack of attention, too. “Are you even listening, B?” she asked, pretending to pout.
Bianca glanced up. “That’s great,” she said with a tight smile. “Really sweet.”
Starsie’s smile faded and she looked a little hurt.
“Oh, a reminder for everyone,” Helen said quickly. “Don’t forget—it’s Buddy’s Hanukkah party next Wednesday. And you’re all coming, right?”
My eyebrows raised. Or course I knew about Buddy’s Hanukkah party—it was an annual tradition, and I hadn’t missed one yet—but I didn’t know he had invited all the Royals. Did he even want them there? It was hard to picture Buddy and Caroline sharing oxygen in the same room.
Caroline cleared her throat, like she was thinking the same thing. “Is this an optional excursion?” she asked. “Because it’s Yoga Sunset Night at my gym, and I could really use it.”
“Come on, Caroline,” Starsie said.
“What? It does wonders for my posture. Seriously. I get like an inch taller.”
“This is important to me,” Helen said. “It’s my first time meeting Buddy’s family! And all his Victoria Middle friends will be there. And I won’t know any of them. I need my friends by my side.”
Caroline groaned. “Fine. I’ll show—because I love you, or whatever. But if anyone posts a picture of me, I will sue for defamation.” Caroline’s gaze landed on me, slowly sizzling my corneas. “I do not ‘hang out’ with Victoria Middle misfits.” She looked back over at Helen apologetically. “Except for your boyfriend, of course.”
Helen ignored the dig. “Well, that’s settled. So, let’s move on. How’s the party shaping up, Pips? Do you need help with the decorations?”
“Yeah, what’s the theme?” Caroline chimed in.
I winced, feeling betrayed by Helen even though I knew her question was innocent. “Umm… things are moving along,” I said, trying to keep my voice neutral. “I have some red and green streamers, and I was thinking of cutting up some paper snowflakes to hang on the windows.”
“And?”
“And?” I repeated. From the look on Caroline’s face, I realized that a pack of streamers from the Dollar Store wasn’t going to cut it. “Well, uh, I was planning on going to the store this weekend,” I lied. “To pick up everything else. So, I’ll know more then.”
Why did I just say that? I swallowed, and the stone inside me doubled in size. It wasn’t just that I had no money. It was that I had negative money. I’d confessed to Helen that I couldn’t pay her back yet, and she had agreed to cover me until I could, but after that, I still needed to find a way to cover food costs. Not to mention the problem of the place… I stifled a groan. The stone was growing bigger by the second.
“If you want, I can bring over some of the decorations I used last year,” Bianca offered.
For a moment, I just stared at her, eyes wide and jaw low. I knew I must have looked like a carp with my mouth hanging open like that, but I was still trying to process what Bianca had just said. Decorations? Bring? To me?
“That’s… really nice of you,” I finally spluttered.
And I truly meant it, but I couldn’t help the tinge of suspicion in my voice. It had only been a month ago that Bianca seethed with resentment because of Eliot; now she wanted to help me? I stared into her intense gray eyes, trying to see if this was a trick, but if it was, she was doing a good job hiding it.
She shrugged. “They’re just sitting around my house, taking up space.”
I took a deep breath and wiped my sweaty palms on my pants. No more worrying about decorations! Of course, decorations didn’t matter if you had nowhere to hang them….
“Why don’t I bring them over tonight?” she added.
“Ooo-kay,” I said. A vision of Bianca coming into my apartment and seeing Mrs. Lee camped out in her bed made sweat break out along my hairline. I’d have to meet her in front of the building. “Just, um, text me when you’re getting close. You know, like a few blocks away. So I’m sure I’ll be there… because I never know where I’ll be… but I won’t be far… because where else would I be….” Stop rambling, Pippa. I smiled at Bianca. “Uh… okay?”
“Sure,” she said, giving me a faintly puzzled look.
“What about entertainment?” Caroline asked. “Last year we screened a bunch of holiday movies in Bianca’s media room.”
I gulped. “I haven’t really gotten that far,” I said.
Win gave me a little smile of support. Her family wasn’t wealthy. Media rooms weren’t part of her world either. “So—who’s your date for the party?” she asked me, trying to change the subject.
Bianca glanced up from her phone, her gaze suddenly, sharply focused on me. Uh-oh. I was in enough potential hot water with the Royals—I didn’t want to give Bianca any doubt about me and Eliot. Not that there was any, unfortunately.
“Um, I’m thinking about asking this guy, Marvel.”
“Marvel? That’s a funny name!” Starsie laughed.
“Starsie,” Win chided her.
“What?” Starsie asked, her eyes widening. “It is. He sounds like a comic book character. Does he have superpowers?”
“Is he your boyfriend?” Bianca asked, ignoring Starsie.
“No. No. We’re just friends.” Bianca’s laser-like gaze was still locked on me. “For now. But who knows?”
“Oh my god, look at your face.” Caroline tittered. “If he’s just a friend, why do you look like you’re about to combust?”
“Do you wish he was your boyfriend?” Starsie waggled her eyebrows. Each of the Royals stared at me expectantly.
“Well… maybe,” I said. “I mean, I like him, and he likes me. Or, at least, I think he does. He gives me a lot of attention when we’re together and laughs at my jokes… but maybe he’s just a friendly person to everyone?”
The group nodded thoughtfully, taking in this new information.
Bianca was the first to break the silence. “There’s only one way to find out,” she declared.
“I know, I know,” I sighed. “I have to ask him if he likes me.”
“Excuse me? Absolutely not!” Her nostrils flared.
I stared blankly at her and she sighed. “Pippa. What if it turns out he doesn’t like you back? Then you would completely lose the high ground.”
“The high ground?”
“It means you keep your pride,” Caroline told me.
It sounded a little ridiculous to me, but the rest of the table seemed to understand what Bianca and Caroline were talking about.
“B and C are right,” Starsie chimed in sagely. “It’s sad when you like someone, and they don’t like you back. But it’s a million times worse when someone doesn’t like you back but also knows that you like them.” A small shudder rocked through her. “It’s my worst nightmare.”
“But if you’re not supposed to ask, then what do you do?” I asked, bewildered.
“You’re supposed to flirt,” Caroline said.
“What does that even mean?” I asked.
“It means you put on something nice and make sure to borrow some mascara.” Caroline sighed.
“Don’t listen to her,” Bianca said, earning a huff from Caroline. Now that she knew I was crushing on someone other than Eliot, she seemed more than happy to offer advice. “Boys don’t like it when you give them all your attention. Of course, you still have to make a move. Otherwise, you could lose him completely. But be subtle.”
“Or you can just tell him that you like his hair,” Starsie added. We all raised our eyebrows at her. “What?” she asked. “Boys like compliments, too. I have a ninety percent success rate with that line.”
I looked at Win, waiting for her to chime in, but she just shrugged. “I don’t know if I’m the best person to give advice,” she said. “Maybe try a lot of eye contact?”
Surprisingly, all the other girls nodded again, like this was obvious.
I was pretty certain that once I told Marvel that Buddy wasn’t my boyfriend, he’d agree to come to the party, but a few dating tips couldn’t hurt. Maybe I’d try some of them out Sunday night at rehearsal.
“Thanks,” I said. “I’ll let you know how it goes.”
* * *
I had just started heating up a pot of creamy chapagetti for me and Mrs. Lee when Bianca texted me a single word: Downstairs.
Nooo! She was supposed to text me when she was close.
Abandoning the pot on the stove, I tugged on my jacket and hurried down the steps. Bianca was sitting in the passenger seat of her dad’s sleek black Range Rover when I walked outside, but once she spotted me, she climbed out, carrying an enormous cardboard box.
“Hey,” I said. “Thanks for dropping this off.” I reached for the box, but she held onto it.
“It’s not heavy. I can handle it,” she told me. “Will you just get the door?”
“Uh, the door?”
“Yeah, the door,” Bianca repeated. She looked like she was resisting the urge to roll her eyes. “I can walk through it and carry this up to your apartment.”
“Riii-iiight,” I said. But I didn’t move an inch.
Bianca tried to take a step past me, and I squeaked out, “No! Um, I mean, no… that’s not necessary. We had a really hard practice today, and I’m sure you’re exhausted, and really I can just bring up the box myself—no problemo!”
“I’m not tired at all,” Bianca countered. She tried to move past me again, but I quickly shifted to the left. “Besides, it can’t hurt for me to take a look around your apartment. We can decide where we want to hang up the tinsel, and if any of the colors don’t work, I’ll get more.”
“That sounds amazing! Except—”
Except what? What could possibly be the exception to that?
“The thing is…” I opened my mouth. I had no idea what was about to come out, but I absolutely couldn’t let Bianca into my apartment while Mrs. Lee commandeered the living room. “Well, you see, my sister has a friend who’s staying at my apartment for a day or two. And she’ll totally be gone by the party, so no worries there, but the thing is, she has a cat, and, well, you know, allergies are just a really big concern right now.”
“But I’m not allergic to cats,” Bianca said. “My uncle has two.”
“Oh, I didn’t mean that you’d be allergic to the cat!” I said hastily. “I meant the cat might be allergic to you! Or, er, not you specifically! Just, in general, he doesn’t react well to people—I mean, new people. He starts barfing everywhere and his eyes go kind of crossed, and, uh, we’re trying really hard to find medication for him, but the vet didn’t have any appointments open—and, anyways, it’s just a huge, complicated… thing,” I finished.
It was by far the most absurd thing I had ever said, but once I started speaking, there was no stopping me, and afterward I had no choice but to own it. I stared at Bianca, and Bianca stared back at me, and inside, I tried to keep myself from dying.
“I see,” Bianca said after a long silence. “In that case, I guess you really should take up the box. Because of your cat. Who is allergic. To me.”
“Right,” I nodded emphatically.
“And you’re sure everything’s okay?”
“What? Of course!” I laughed. “A hundred and twenty thousand percent.”
Bianca stared at me with those impenetrable eyes for another minute, and then she shrugged. “In that case, I guess I’ll be going.” She looked at the dark-tinted windows of her dad’s car and then turned back to me. “Pippa… thank you.”
“Of course, I—wait, what was that?”
“I said, ‘Thank you,’ ” Bianca repeated. “I know Caroline is being a little bit of a pain about everything, so I just wanted to say thank you for handling this.”
I waited for the nasty follow-up or the “but,” only it didn’t happen. Apparently, Bianca was being sincere. And it would have made me feel over the moon—if I wasn’t on the verge of messing things up so badly with her and everyone else.
“Anyway, I’ll see you Monday. Let me know if you need any help.” She cleared her throat and her shoulders bunched up a little, like she wanted to say something more. “Bye, Pippa.”
She turned back to her car, and for a fleeting second, I thought about calling out to her. Maybe this was the time to tell her the truth about the party—that I really, truly did need help.
Of course, I didn’t say anything.
I watched her slowly open the door, climb in, and disappear. Then I slumped back against the brick wall of my apartment building, my breath rushing out in a plume of disappointment.
I’d had the chance to ask Bianca for help, but I hadn’t taken it. I couldn’t take it. And I had no idea why.
I shook my head. I was always trying to prove myself to the Royals—always insisting that I could handle everything. And look where it had gotten me. My insecurities had pushed me to this cliff, and now that I was here, I didn’t know how to get back down. Ignoring the pounding in my temples, I carried the box upstairs and into my room. I cracked open the top—and stared at enough tinsel to decorate a football stadium. The box had everything. Gold streamers, sparkling fairy lights, artificial green garlands… there were even the gold-plated snowflakes Caroline had sent me photos of from the department store.
Bianca had brought me a treasure trove!
Unfortunately for all of us, I had nowhere to put them.
16 ASSESS AND ADAPT
Only 10 Days Until Christmas Eve
(And Trying Hard Not to Think About It)
As I walked into the church on Sunday evening, my phone chirped at me. I pulled it out and frowned at the notification. I had a voice mail? No one left me voice mails. Not even Mina, since she always complained that I never checked them.
What was my password again? As I tried punching in numbers, I could hear angry voices on the stage.
“It’s all her fault!”
“We don’t want her on our team anymore.”
Yikes, that sounded bad. Maybe I shouldn’t go inside just yet…. Stopping outside the sanctuary, I perched on a chair and tried another number combination. Yes! It worked.
I pressed the phone to my ear… and my heart practically exploded as I heard the most wonderful voice mail ever.
“Miss Park? This is Joanne at the Blue Room.” That was one of the party spaces I’d called. “I wanted to let you know that we just had a cancellation on December 24, so if you’re still interested in our space, it is available.”
